Mommy Dearest, Page 2

  “Mommy,” Rob’s mom says. It’s one of the few things she has learned how to say. She insists on Crystal calling her Mommy, but Crystal still finds it strange.

  “Okay, Mommy,” Crystal says, tasting the word and finding it odd in her mouth. “Would you like a sandwich?” She lifts up her own so she can see it. “Sandwich?”

  Rob’s mother shakes her head. She doesn’t seem to eat much, except for chocolate. Crystal has noticed that a lot of their chocolate has disappeared from the big box in the pantry, but she doesn’t comment on it. There is no reason to. Old ladies have a sweet tooth. It’s only normal.

  Crystal closes the window, then finishes making her own sandwich and starts to eat it, standing by the counter. She looks at her watch and wonders if her wash is done. She decides to go check once she is done eating the sandwich.

  Rob is working from home today and she walks to his office to tell him to come out for lunch.

  “I made you a tuna sandwich. It’s on the counter in the kitchen,” she says.

  “I’ll be right there,” he says, smiling. He types a few words on his computer, then gets up, kisses her on the forehead and follows her out.

  As they walk through the living room, there is suddenly something that strikes her. She can’t put her finger on what exactly it is, but something is different, she thinks, then turns her head to look at the fireplace. She walks closer, then picks up one of the picture frames.

  “What’s going on?” Rob asks.

  She stares at the picture of her and Rob from their trip to the Bahamas, for a very long time. Then she puts the frame down and picks another one up.

  Crystal can hardly breathe.

  “What’s wrong, honey? You’re all pale?”

  She grabs all the frames and sits on the couch with them. Rob sits next to her, looking at what she has in her hands.

  “What’s the matter? What’s going on? Why are you crying?”

  She shows him one picture, then sobs: “I tried so hard. I did my best. I am not a housewife, yet I tried. I even cooked. I thought she liked me. I thought we were doing great.”

  “What are you talking about?” Rob looks at her, his eyebrows wrinkled in deep concern.

  Crystal points at the picture and the missing face. “She cut me out, Rob. Look. She cut me out of each and every picture I have put out. My face is gone from all of our memories.”

  He looks at them, then shakes his head, looking like he doesn’t quite believe her. “Who did this?” he asks.

  “Well, who do you think? You mother dearest, of course.”

  Rob wrinkles his forehead. “My mother? Why on earth would she do something like that?”

  “Well, you tell me,” Crystal says. “Look at them. My face is missing in every picture, every memory I have of us together.”

  Rob looks pensive. “I don’t see why she would do that. Are you absolutely sure it was her?”

  “Who else could it be, huh? You tell me, Rob. We’re the only three people in this house. There is only you, me, and your mother.”

  “But, come on. It’s my mother? I hardly think she’d do something like this. She’s usually so…”

  “Did you do it?” Crystal asks. She is getting furious now. Why won’t he believe her?

  He shakes his head, looking annoyed. He knows where this is going. “Of course not.”

  She puts her hand on her chest. “You think I did it? You think I would cut my own face out of all these pictures, huh?”

  Rob scoffs. “No, of course not.”

  “Then, I rest my case.”

  Rob nods. He sighs and rubs his eyes like he always does when he’s tired. “Okay. Okay. I’ll talk to her.”

  He gets up and leans over and kisses Crystal on the head. She watches him as he walks out of the living room, then listens as they discuss loudly in Romanian. A few minutes later, Rob returns.

  “She says she didn’t do it.”

  “What? She’s lying.”

  He throws out his arms, then sits next to Crystal again, putting his arm around her shoulder. “I don’t know what to say. I’m so sorry, honey. I guess she liked Lisa a lot better than I thought.”

  Crystal sniffles. “You think that’s why she did it?”

  He shrugs. “I don’t know, honey. I really don’t know. She says she didn’t do it, so I can’t very well get her to tell me why. I don’t think she has anything against you. I really don’t. I just think she might need some time to adjust to the whole situation. She and Lisa were pretty close. She liked her a lot. I told her to behave and she promised she would, okay? And I’ll make sure to replace all the pictures.” He looks into Crystal’s eyes. “Now, give me one of those beautiful smiles that I love so much. She’s only here for a month. One month. That’s all. Okay? Let’s make the best of it, hm? She is, after all, my mother.”

  “I don’t know how I sh…”

  “Just let it go, honey. I know it’s not easy, but I am asking you to do this. Can you do that for me?”

  Crystal looks at him, looks into those gorgeous brown eyes, then nods with a sniffle.

  “Okay,” she says. “I’ll do my very best.”

  “That’s my girl.”

  5

  Crystal pretends like nothing has happened. She has decided to let it go, to forgive the old woman—even if she won’t admit to having done it—for the sake of her beloved Rob because having his mother here makes him so happy.

  Because it’s the right thing to do.

  The next evening, she cooks a nice steak for dinner for the three of them and serves baked potatoes with them, because she knows Rob’s mother loves potatoes. Crystal doesn’t say much during dinner. In silence, she watches Rob and his mother, while secretly looking forward to the day when she’ll have him all to herself once again. After all, all women have to deal with a mother-in-law, right?

  At least yours lives across the globe. For now.

  Rob seems to have forgotten the whole picture ordeal already. He and his mother are chummy and chat with each other in Romanian, while Crystal feels left out. Rob says something, looks quickly at Crystal, then says something else, leaning over, almost whispering it to her. His mother bursts into laughter, looking at Crystal too, then shakes her head with a very loud tsk.

  What are they talking about? Me?

  Crystal decides to not care. She continues to eat her steak and sips her red wine. Well, a little more than sips it, more like gulps it down before asking Rob for more. But he doesn’t hear her; he is chatting with his mother, laughing. His mother leans over, grabs her napkin, then spits on it before she removes some steak sauce from Rob’s chin. Rob laughs, then turns to look at Crystal, looking like it is the most normal thing in the world.

  She just spit-washed him! She spit-washed your man!

  After removing the sauce, Rob’s mother grabs his cheek, pulls it and shakes it while making a weird gobbling sound. Crystal feels sick to her stomach, but it’s not over yet.

  Seconds after she has pulled his cheek, the old woman leans forward and kisses Rob on the lips, making loud smacking sounds.

  What the heck? I have to kiss that mouth!

  Once her lips depart from Rob’s, she turns to look at Crystal. Crystal tries hard not to read too much into her expression or the look in her eyes, but it sure feels like she is triumphantly saying:

  “You’ll never get him. You’re not good enough for him anyway.”

  But, of course, Crystal could be wrong.

  Don’t let her get to you like this. It’s what she wants. She wants to come between you two. Don’t let her.

  “So, do you want to watch a movie tonight?” Crystal says, smiling widely at Rob’s mother, with a look in her eyes stating:

  “He was yours, but now he is mine. Two can play that game.”

  Rob looks perplexed at her. Then shrugs. “Sure.”

  Now, it is Crystal’s turn to smile triumphantly. There is no way Rob’s mom will be able to watch a full-length American movie wit
h no subtitles. This way, Crystal has him to herself. At least for tonight.

  “The new Star Wars is on demand. We could watch it?”

  “Yeah…well…I mean…” He sighs, then looks at his mother. “Well, the thing is. I promised her I would help buy her an iPad, though. You know she can’t really navigate on Amazon on her own, so we’ll have to wait till that’s done, but I’m sure we can do it afterward.”

  Crystal exhales and leans back in her seat. She looks at her future mother-in-law, who sends her a victorious smile, revealing some very sharp corner teeth.

  6

  Of course, the old bat stays up all evening, sitting with Rob at his computer, looking at iPads and iPad covers on Amazon. Crystal sits on the couch, reading her book while waiting for the old woman to go to bed.

  Why is she still awake? She usually goes to bed at eight thirty. It’s almost ten. She’s doing this just to annoy me, isn’t she? Well, I am not letting her. I will ignore her attempt at making my life miserable.

  As the clock strikes eleven thirty, the old woman finally decides on an iPad and a cover and kisses her son when she gets up from the chair, helped by Rob. Crystal smiles at her and wishes her goodnight, then looks at the clock. Rob comes to her and sits down.

  “Guess it’s too late for that movie, huh?”

  Crystal nods. “Sure is.”

  Rob leans his head on her shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

  She chuckles. “It’s okay, baby. She’s your mother.”

  “Let’s go to bed.”

  Crystal puts her book down, kisses Rob, and gets up. They walk hand in hand to the bedroom. He grabs her and lifts her up on the bed, then undresses her. She laughs and enjoys his kisses. They make love and Crystal forgets everything about creepy mother-in-laws and the fact that they have to get up at six thirty in the morning because Rob has an early meeting.

  When they’re done, they brush their teeth and go to bed. Crystal is the last one in and she turns off the light. As she does, she looks outside through the curtain. Then she screams.

  Rob, who has his head in his iPad, looks up. “What’s going on? Why are you screaming?”

  “There’s someone out there,” she says.

  Rob jumps out of bed and pulls the curtains aside. “Where? I don’t see anyone.”

  “Someone was there. I saw a figure. Right outside our window, Rob. Someone was looking in. Oh, my God, it was creepy.”

  “I don’t see anyone now.”

  “It disappeared,” she says. “The figure went away. When I screamed, the person ran.”

  Rob opens the door leading to the yard and walks outside. Crystal is right behind him.

  “There,” she says. “The figure was standing right here. Facing the window, as if they were looking in. Oh, my God, Rob. Do you think this person watched us having sex? Oh, my God, Rob, that scares me.”

  “I’m sure it was just someone passing by,” Rob says and walks around the corner of the house to be sure, then returns. “Maybe it was a homeless person, like the one who tried to get into Steve and Marcia’s house the other day. He probably thought the house was empty. Don’t worry about it, honey. He’s probably harmless, just looking for shelter. I don’t see anyone now. Whoever it was got the scare of a lifetime and won’t be back.”

  Crystal swallows hard. “Are you sure?”

  He nods and grabs her hand in his. “I am positive. Now let’s get back to bed. We have an early morning, remember?”

  Crystal whimpers, then nods. “O-okay.”

  They walk back to bed and get in. Crystal lies for a very long time staring at the ceiling, eyes wide open.

  7

  “You want a second cup for the road?”

  Crystal looks at Rob. She is exhausted. So is he. All night, she kept waking him up, thinking she saw something outside and asking him to go check.

  “Sure,” he says with a sigh.

  She hands him one, then helps him with his tie. “I’m sorry for waking you up last night.”

  “It’s okay,” he says. “You were scared.”

  He kisses her on the nose. She closes her eyes. She hears a voice coming from behind, speaking a language she doesn’t understand. Crystal sighs. Rob’s mother isn’t usually up this early. She senses it will be a very long day. Rob won’t be home till late tonight.

  Crystal feels Rob pull away, and then he addresses his mother in Romanian. They speak in what sounds like agitated words, but Crystal doesn’t know if they are. It often sounds like that when they speak.

  “Is anything wrong?” Crystal asks, not really that interested. She had planned to drink coffee in bed as soon as Rob was out the door, but now it looks like she’ll have to fix breakfast for Rob’s mom instead. Usually, Rob’s mother sleeps till at least ten, so she thought she had plenty of time.

  Rob shakes his head. “No. My mom needs to wash some clothes. She didn’t bring much.”

  “Now?” Crystal asks.

  “Yes. She insists. Could you please just help her out?” he looks at his watch. “I’m late.”

  Crystal sighs. “Sure. Now, go.”

  Rob kisses her on the nose.

  “I love you,” she says as he heads out the door.

  “Same.”

  She waves without cringing, then realizes Rob’s mother is standing right next to her in the doorway, also waving at her son. He blows both of them kisses and then drives away.

  “Okay. Show me what needs to be washed,” Crystal says, trying to signal washing, which is harder than you think. “Was-shed.”

  The old woman nods and smiles eagerly, then points towards the guest room. “Yes, yes.”

  Crystal follows her inside the room. There are clothes everywhere on the floor, on the chair, and even on the desk and bed. Never has Crystal seen such a mess. Old bags of chips spread out and spilled on the carpet, soda cans, and chocolate wrappings. The old woman picks up a few articles of clothing and puts them in a pile in the middle of the floor. Crystal goes to grab a basket from her bedroom and puts in all the clothes, while Rob’s mother just watches, nodding and pointing.

  “Yes, yes.”

  Crystal sighs and carries all the woman’s clothes to the washer and starts to fill it, wondering how she can have used all these clothes in just the few days she has been there. Didn’t she sleep most of the time?

  Did she bring dirty clothes here?

  Crystal shakes the thought, then puts more in from the basket, when she suddenly stops and takes out a long blue skirt.

  Is that blood?

  Crystal looks at it closer, then shakes her head in disbelief. She puts the skirt in the washer and puts detergent in. As she is about to turn it on, she changes her mind. She opens the lid and pulls out the skirt instead, thinking:

  This might end up coming in handy.

  8

  Crystal puts the skirt in her bedroom and hides it in a drawer. When Rob returns that same night, late, she doesn’t mention it. They eat a late dinner, all three of them, Rob’s mother slurping her soup so loudly it makes Crystal’s skin crawl.

  Rob, on the other hand, seems happy. It has been a long but good day, he tells her while they eat.

  “Very productive.”

  Rob has started his own company that sells components to Boeing and the space program. Exactly what it is they sell, Crystal never understood, but his company is doing very well, and when it is going well, Rob is happy and so is Crystal.

  “I got you a little something,” he says and goes through his pockets. He finds a small box and hands it to her.

  Crystal gasps and looks at Rob’s mother, clasping her mouth. Rob’s mother smiles and nods, exclaiming:

  “Yes, yes.”

  Crystal opens the box. Inside is a beautiful bracelet.

  “Rob! It’s gorgeous,” she says and takes it out to see it in the light. “What’s the occasion?”

  “Does a man need an occasion to spoil his fiancé?”

  She chuckles. “Of course not.”

>   “You like it?”

  “Like it? I love it.”

  He helps her put it on. She gasps when she sees it on her wrist. The diamonds glisten in the light from the chandelier above.

  “Oh, Rob, it’s gorgeous.” She gets up, then kisses him lovingly.

  He looks her in the eyes. “Thanks for putting up with everything lately.”

  She chuckles. She knows what he means. “No problem. For you, I’ll put up with anything.”

  Crystal sits back down in her chair, not taking her eyes off the bracelet on her arm. Rob suddenly says:

  “Oh wait, that reminds me…” he searches again, then pulls out another box, a smaller one, and hands it to his mother.

  “This is for you.”

  Crystal looks at Rob’s mother, who squeals in happiness as she opens the small velvet box and pulls out a set of earrings.

  “What’s that?” Crystal asks.

  Rob grins. “Look. They match. It was a set, but I thought I’d give each of you one. That way you’ll be like sisters.”

  He is still grinning. He means it seriously. Crystal suddenly wants to throw away the bracelet, while Rob helps his mother put the earrings in. They look ridiculous on her, way too heavy for her old ears. Too shiny.

  “Thank you,” his mother says. “Thank you.”

  So now you can speak English.

  The look on Rob’s face is priceless. He is so happy, holding his mother who is smiling from earring to earring. Crystal doesn’t know what to say. She looks at the bracelet, then back at Rob, who kisses his mother on the lips.

  “I lo-ve you,” his mother says, pronouncing it lo-vah.

  “Aw,” Rob says, looks at Crystal and says: “Did you hear that? She must have picked it up while she was here. That’s so sweet.” He looks his mother in the eyes, then says:

  “I love you too, Momma. I love you too.”

  9

  Once in bed, they try to have sex, but Crystal is not into it. She lets him finish his business, then rolls to the side and turns off the light. She closes her eyes, grumbling angrily something incomprehensible that Rob doesn’t even hear.