Invitation to a Beheading, Page 3

  Meanwhile Marthe began deceiving him during the very first year of their marriage; anywhere and with anybody. Generally when Cincinnatus came home she would have a certain sated half-smile on her face as she pressed her plump chin against her neck, as if reproaching herself, and, gazing up with her honest hazel eyes, would say in a soft cooing voice, "Little Marthe did it again today." He would look at her for a few seconds, pressing his palm to his cheek like a woman, and then, whining soundlessly, would go off through all the rooms full of her relatives and lock himself in the bathroom, where he would stamp his feet, let the water run and cough so as to cover up the sound of his weeping. Sometimes, to justify herself, she would explain to him, "You know what a kind creature I am: it's such a small thing, and it's such a relief to a man."

  Soon she became pregnant, and not by him. She bore a boy, immediately got pregnant again--again not by him--and bore a girl. The boy was lame and evil-tempered, the girl dull, obese and nearly blind. Because of their defects both children ended up in his kindergarten, and it was odd to see nimble, sleek, rosy Marthe leading home this cripple and this stocky tot. Gradually Cincinnatus stopped watching himself altogether, and one day, at some open meeting in the city park there was a sudden wave of alarm and someone said in a loud voice, "Citizens, there is among us a--" Here followed a strange, almost forgotten word, and the wind swished through the locust trees, and Cincinnatus found nothing better than to get up and walk away, absent-mindedly picking leaves from bushes bordering the path. And ten days later he was arrested.

  "Tomorrow, probably," said Cincinnatus as he slowly walked about the cell. "Tomorrow, probably," said Cincinnatus and sat down on the cot, kneading his forehead with the palm of his hand. A sunset ray was repeating effects that were already familiar. "Tomorrow, probably," said Cincinnatus with a sigh. "It was too quiet today, so tomorrow, bright and early ..."

  For a while they were all silent--the earthenware pitcher with water at the bottom that had offered drink to all the prisoners of the world; the walls, with their arms around each other's shoulders like a foursome discussing a square secret in inaudible whispers; the velvet spider, somehow resembling Marthe; the large black books on the table...

  "What a misunderstanding" said Cincinnatus and suddenly burst out laughing. He stood up and took off the dressing gown, the skullcap, the slippers. He took off the linen trousers and shirt. He took off his head like a toupee, took off his collarbones like shoulder straps, took off his rib cage like a hauberk. He took off his hips and his legs, he took off his arms like gauntlets and threw them in a corner. What was left of him gradually dissolved, hardly coloring the air. At first Cincinnatus simply reveled in the coolness; then, fully immersed in his secret medium, he began freely and happily to ...

  The iron thunderclap of the bolt resounded, and Cincinnatus instantly grew all that he had cast off, the skullcap included. Rodion the jailer brought a dozen yellow plums in a round basket lined with grape leaves, a present from the director's wife.

  Cincinnatus, your criminal exercise has refreshed you.

  Three

  Cincinnatus was awakened by the doomlike din of voices mounting in the corridor.

  Even though the day before he had prepared for such an awakening, still he could not cope with his breathing and the beating of his heart. Folding the dressing gown over his heart so that it would not see--be quiet, it is nothing (as one says to a child at the moment of an incredible disaster)--covering his heart and raising himself slightly, Cincinnatus listened. There was the shuffling of many feet, at various levels of audibility; there were voices, also at various depths; one surged up, with a question; another, closer, responded. Hastening from afar, someone whizzed by and started to slide over the stone as over ice. In the midst of the hubbub the director's bass uttered several words, indistinct but definitely imperative. The most frightening thing was that all this bustle was pierced by a child's voice--the director had a small daughter. Cincinnatus distinguished both the whining tenor of his lawyer and the muttering of Rodion ... And again somebody on the run asked a booming question, and somebody boomingly answered. A huffing, a crackling, a clattering, as if someone were probing with a stick under a bench. "Couldn't find it?" the director inquired distinctly. Footsteps ran past. Footsteps ran past. Ran past and returned. Cincinnatus could not bear it any longer; he lowered his feet to the floor: they had not let him see Marthe after all.... Should I begin dressing, or will they come to costume me? Oh, have done with it, come in ...

  However, they tortured him for another two minutes or so. Suddenly the door opened, and, gliding, his lawyer rushed in.

  He was ruffled and sweaty. He was fiddling with his left cuff and his eyes were wandering around.

  "I lost a cuff link," he exclaimed, panting rapidly like a dog. "Must have--rushed against some--when I was with sweet little Emmie--she's always so full of mischief--by the coattails--everytime I drop in--and the point is that I heard something--but I didn't pay any--look, the chain must have--I was very fond of--well, it's too late now--maybe I can still--I promised all the guards--it's a pity, though--"

  "A foolish, sleepy error," said Cincinnatus quietly. "I misinterpreted the fuss. This sort of thing is not good for the heart."

  "Oh, thanks, don't worry about it, it's nothing," absentmindedly muttered the lawyer. And with his eyes he literally scoured the corners of the cell. It was plain that he was upset by the loss of that precious object. It was plain. The loss of the object upset him. The object was precious. He was upset by the loss of the object.

  With a soft groan Cincinnatus went back to bed. The other sat down at the foot of the cot.

  "As I was coming to see you," said the lawyer, "I was so spry and cheerful ... But now this trifle has distressed me--for, after all, it is a trifle, you will agree; there are more important things. Well, how are you feeling?"

  "In the mood for a confidential chat," replied Cincinnatus with eyes closed. "I want to share with you some conclusions I have reached. I am surrounded by some sort of wretched specters, not by people. They torment me as can torment only senseless visions, bad dreams, dregs of delirium, the drivel of nightmares and everything that passes down here for real life. In theory one would wish to wake up. But wake up I cannot without outside help, and yet I fear this help terribly, and my very soul has grown lazy and accustomed to its snug swaddling clothes. Of all the specters that surround me, you, Roman Vissarionovich, are probably the most wretched, but on the other hand--in view of your logical position in our invented habitus--you are in a manner of speaking, an adviser, a defender ..."

  "At your service," said the lawyer, glad that Cincinnatus had at last become talkative.

  "So this is what I want to ask you: on what grounds do they refuse to tell me the exact execution date? Wait a minute, I am not finished yet. The so-called director avoids a straight answer, and refers to the fact that--wait a minute! I want to know, in the first place, who has the authority to appoint the day. I want to know, in the second place, how to get some sense out of that institution, or individual, or group of individuals ..."

  The lawyer, who had just been impatient to speak, now for some reason was silent. His made-up face with its dark blue eyebrows and long harelip revealed no particular mental activity.

  "Leave your cuff alone," said Cincinnatus, "and try to concentrate."

  Roman Vissarionovich jerkily changed the position of his body and clasped his restless fingers. In a plaintive voice he said, "It is exactly for that tone...."

  "That I am being executed," said Cincinnatus. "I know that. Go on!"

  "Let's change the subject, I implore you," cried Roman Vissarionovich. "Can't you even now remain within legitimate limits? This is really awful. It is beyond my endurance. I dropped in merely to ask if you didn't have some legitimate wishes ... for instance" (here his face lit up), "perhaps you should like to have printed copies of the speeches made at the trial? In case of such desire you must immediately submit the necessary petition, whic
h you and I could prepare right now, with detailed specifications as to just how many copies of the speeches you require and for what purpose. I happen to have a free hour--Oh, please, please let's do this! I have even brought a special envelope."

  "Just out of curiosity ..." said Cincinnatus, "but first ... Then, there is really no chance of getting an answer?"

  "A special envelope," repeated the lawyer to tempt him.

  "All right, let's have it," said Cincinnatus, and tore the thick, stuffed envelope into crimpy scraps.

  "You shouldn't have done that," cried the lawyer, on the verge of tears. "You shouldn't have done that at all. You don't even realize what you have done. Perhaps there was a pardon in there. It won't be possible to get another!"

  Cincinnatus picked up a handful of scraps and tried to reconstruct at least one coherent sentence, but everything was mixed up, distorted, disjointed.

  "This is the sort of thing you always do," whined the lawyer, clutching his temples and pacing across the cell. "Perhaps your salvation was right in your very hands, and you ... It's horrible! Well, what shall I do with you? It's lost and gone now ... And I was so pleased! I was preparing you so carefully!"

  "May I?" said the director in a distended voice as he opened the door ajar. "I shan't disturb you?"

  "Please come in, Rodrig Ivanovich, please come in," said the lawyer. "Please come in, dear Rodrig Ivanovich. Only it is not very cheerful in here ..."

  "Well, and how is our doomed friend today?" quipped the elegant, dignified director, compressing in his meaty purple paws the cold little hand of Cincinnatus. "Is everything all right? No aches or pains? Still gossiping with our indefatigable Roman Vissarionovich? Oh, by the way, dear Roman Vissarionovich, I have some good news for you-- my little romp just found your cuff link on the stairs. La voici. This is French gold, isn't it? Very, very dainty. I usually do not make compliments, but I must say...."

  They both walked over to a corner, pretending to examine the charming trinket, discuss its history and value, marvel at it. Cincinnatus took this opportunity to take up from under the cot, and, with a high, purling sound, which became hesitant at the end, to ...

  "Yes, indeed, in excellent taste, excellent," the director was repeating as he walked back from the corner with the lawyer. "So you are feeling well, young man," he meaninglessly addressed Cincinnatus, who was climbing back into bed. "However you must not be childish. The public, and all of us, as representatives of the public, are interested only in your welfare--that must be obvious by now. We are ready to make things easier for you by relieving your loneliness. In a few days a new prisoner will be moving in to one of our deluxe cells. You will become acquainted, and that will entertain you."

  "In a few days?" asked Cincinnatus. "Then there will be a few more days?"

  "Listen to him," chuckled the director. "He has to know everything. How do you like that, Roman Vissarionovich?"

  "Oh, my friend, you are so right," sighed the lawyer.

  "Yes, sir," continued the former, giving his keys a rattle. "You ought to be more cooperative, mister. All the time he's haughty, angry, snide. Last night I brought him some of them plums, you know, and what do you think? His excellency did not choose to eat them, his excellency was too proud. Yes sir! I started to tell you about that there new prisoner. You will have your fill of chit-chat with him. No need to mope as you do. Isn't that right, Roman Vissarionovich?"

  "That's right, Rodion, that right," concurred the lawyer with an involuntary smile.

  Rodion stroked his beard and went on: "I've got to feeling very sorry for the poor gentleman--I come in, I look, he's up on the table-and-chair, trying to reach the bars with his little hands and feet, like a sick monkey. And with the sky real blue, and the swallows a-flying, and cloudlets a-high--such bliss, such blessings! I take the gentleman down from the table like a baby, and meself I bawl--yes, just as I'm standing here--I bawl and bawl ... I really went all to pieces, I was so sorry for him."

  "Well, shall we take him upstairs, what do you think?" the lawyer suggested hesitantly.

  "Why, sure thing, that we can," drawled Rodion with sedate benevolence. "We can always do that."

  "Drape yourself in your dressing gown," uttered Roman Vissarionovich.

  Cincinnatus said, "I obey you, specters, werewolves, parodies. I obey you. However, I demand--yes, demand" (and the other Cincinnatus began to stamp his feet hysterically, losing his slippers) "to be told how long I have left to live ... and whether I shall be allowed to see my wife."

  "You probably will," replied Roman Vissarionovich, after exchanging glances with Rodion. "Just don't you talk so much. All right, let's go."

  "If you please," said Rodion, giving the unlocked door a shove with his shoulder.

  All three went out: first Rodion, bowlegged, in old faded breeches, baggy in the seat; behind him the lawyer, in a frock coat, with a smudge on his celluloid collar and an edging of pinkish muslin at the back of his head where the black wig ended; and finally, behind him, Cincinnatus, losing his slippers, wrapping himself more tightly in his dressing gown.

  At the bend in the corridor the other, nameless, guard gave them a salute. The pale stony light alternated with regions of darkness. They walked, and walked. One bend followed another. Several times they passed the very same design of dampness on the wall, looking like some dreadful ribby horse. Here and there it was necessary to turn on light; a dusty bulb, up above or at the side, would burst into bitter yellow light. Sometimes, also, it would be burned out, and then they would shuffle on through dense darkness. At one spot, where an unexpected and inexplicable sunbeam fell from above and glowed mistily as it broke on the eroded flagstones, Emmie, the director's daughter, in a bright checkered frock and checkered socks--a mere child, but with the marble calves of a little ballerina--was bouncing a ball, rhythmically against the wall. She turned, brushing a blond lock from her cheek with the fourth and fifth fingers of her hand, and followed the brief little procession with her eyes. Rodion gave a playful jingle with his keys as he passed; the lawyer lightly stroked her glowing hair; but she was staring at Cincinnatus, who gave her a frightened smile. Upon reaching the next bend of the passage, all three glanced back. Emmie was gazing after them, while she lightly plopped the glossy red and blue ball in her hands.

  Again they walked in darkness for a long time, until they came to a dead end where a ruby bulb shone above a coiled fire hose. Rodion unlocked a low iron door; beyond it a stone staircase wound steeply upward. Here the order changed somewhat: Rodion marked time as he let first the lawyer and then Cincinnatus pass; upon which he softly fell in at the end of the procession.

  It was not easy to climb the steep staircase, whose progress was accompanied by a gradual thinning of the gloom in which it grew, and they climbed for such a long time that, out of boredom, Cincinnatus began counting the steps, reached a three-digit number, but then stumbled and lost count. It grew lighter by degrees. Exhausted, Cincinnatus was climbing like a child, beginning with the same foot each time. One more twist, and suddenly there was a solid rush of wind, a dazzling expansion of summer sky, and the air was pierced by the cry of swallows.

  Our travelers found themselves on a broad terrace at the top of a tower, whence there was a breathtaking view, since not only was the tower huge, but the whole fortress towered hugely on the crest of a huge cliff, of which it seemed to be a monstrous outgrowth. Far below one could see the almost vertical vineyards, and the creamy road that wound down to the dry river bed; a tiny person in red was crossing the convex bridge; the speck running in front of him was most likely a dog.

  Further away the sun-flooded town described an ample hemicycle: some of the varicolored houses proceeded in even rows, accompanied by round trees, while others, awry, crept down slopes, stepping on their own shadows; one could distinguish the traffic moving on First Boulevard, and an amethystine shimmer at the end, where the famous fountain played; and still further, toward the hazy folds of the hills that formed the horizon, th
ere was the dark stipple of oak groves, with, here and there, a pond gleaming like a hand mirror, while other bright ovals of water gathered, glowing through the tender mist, over there to the west, where the serpentine Strop had its source. Cincinnatus, his palm pressed to his cheek, in motionless, ineffably vague and perhaps even blissful despair, gazed at the glimmer and haze of the Tamara Gardens and at the dove-blue melting hills beyond them--oh, it was a long time before he could take his eyes away...

  A few paces from him, the lawyer leaned his elbows on the broad stone parapet, whose top was overgrown with some kind of enterprising vegetable. His back was soiled with chalk. He peered pensively into space, his left patent-leather shoe placed upon his right, and so distending his cheeks with his fingers that his lower eyelids turned out. Rodion had found a broom somewhere and kept silent as he swept the terrace flagstones.