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Home Tears, Page 23

Tijan


  “Because you’re cool and fun, and he’s not.” Kate clinked her drink to one of Bubba’s.

  “Yeah.” Bubba nodded in agreement. “We even bought these two orange hunting pads, you know that you can sit on when you’re hunting and they warm your ass up. Aiden sewed them onto this waistband that she took from my old underwear. We’re going to make Robbie wear them when he gets here.”

  Kate’s smile slipped. “Thanks for that.”

  Bubba clamped a hand on Kate’s shoulder. “Robbie is a baboon, if you ask me.”

  “I know.” And Kate tried for a smile, but the energy was gone.

  He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her in the air in a big hug. He whispered something in her ear, and Kate squealed. Her smile wasn’t as forced anymore. Then she stopped, looking inside the doors, and nudged Dani with her arm. She gestured inside.

  Jake was right inside with Julia next to him. They were both in the front entryway, and Jake was staring at them. His eyes skimmed over the flamingo with the faintest tease of a grin at his mouth. Then Julia looked up from where she’d been listening to someone else talking. She saw Dani and stiffened immediately.

  Dani muttered under her breath, “I don’t want to go in there.”

  And just then, the door opened. Jake walked outside with Julia in tow.

  “Jake!” Bubba lifted his arms, but couldn’t shake or hug him. He was holding his drink. “You need some coconut juice?” Before Jake could respond, Bubba clamped him on the shoulder with his free hand and moved around. “I’ll get you coconut juice. You, too, Julia. You look like you need to get buzzed.”

  Julia opened her mouth, but closed it as Bubba was already through the door.

  “He’s on orders to get everyone drunk and to get their car keys.” The ends of Kate’s mouth tugged upward in a grin, but it slipped as she nodded to Julia. “Julia.”

  “Kate.”

  Dani chuckled. She shouldn’t, but she couldn’t stop herself. She was saying before she completely realized what was going to come out of her mouth, “Man—two people you hate, Julia. You’re stuck out here with us. And you have to play nice.” She whistled. “That’s gotta burn in a special place.”

  Jake’s head tipped upwards. “Oh, my God.”

  Kate looked away. Her shoulders shook a tiny bit.

  Julia sighed. “Nice, Dani. That’s real classy.”

  “I’ve already gone three rounds with our grandmother. You remember her? She’s alive, and she hates my guts right now. I can handle going a round with you.”

  Julia frowned. “Our grandmother?”

  “Sandra O’Hara is alive and kicking, although I guess it could be debated on how ‘alive’ she actually is. She’s not real big on being accountable for anything, but hey. I know where the ‘running’ trait came from. Did you know how fucked up our family is? Some of it came from her. Shocker.”

  Julia went unnaturally still. “I don’t believe you. You’re just trying to play games because you’re hoping that I won’t press charges against you for burglary.”

  “You already tried.” Dani gestured to Jake and Kate. “But we do have two police officers right here. Feel free to try again.”

  “It’s mine, and I want it back.”

  Jake cleared his throat. His voice rose in volume. “I thought we were here for poker.” He put his arm around Julia’s shoulder, turning her back inside. “Let’s play some poker.”

  “I have as much right to Mother’s picture as you, Dani.”

  “No, you don’t!”

  “How can you say that?” Julia cried out. “You don’t know anything about our family—”

  “Your family!” Dani interrupted, holding on to her drink for dear life. This wasn’t the place, but whom was she kidding? Julia would never meet with her one-on-one. It was here and now. She was tired of avoiding. It was time to fight. “It’s been your family from day one after Mother was buried. Kathryn took you and Erica in and I was pushed out.”

  “Bullshit. You got Mae. I got Kathryn.” Julia couldn’t keep the bitterness from her voice.

  “Has that been building up over the years?” Dani taunted. “What? Are you bothered you didn’t get both aunts?”

  “This is ridiculous!” Julia hissed. “We are adults, and we are above this.”

  “No, we’re not. We’re sisters.”

  “You’re irrational—” Julia started to chide her sister, but Dani cut her off, “Kinda like needing to leave a party so you can obsessively mop the kitchen floor at midnight because it wasn’t mopped enough earlier in the day? Irrational like that?”

  Julia sucked in her breath—again.

  Jake groaned. “Oh no.”

  Julia’s eyes flashed a warning. “Excuse me?”

  Dani shook her head. “I’m not going to excuse you. You have to have everything in perfect order. You have to feel needed, all the time. You were like that growing up. I’ve no doubt you’re like that now. I bet Kathryn doesn’t need you to remind her to take her pills. She’s got her own alarms set to remind herself to take those pills.”

  “Dani.”

  She whipped her head to regard Jake. “What? What cardinal sin have I committed now?!”

  Jake murmured quietly, “Kathryn’s dying. We got the news this past week.”

  This past week—when Jake was schmoozing with Boone and his family, when Julia was suddenly friends with Boone’s new girlfriend.

  Dani snorted, hardening over an ache inside of her. “Let me guess. You were never going to tell me. Were you?”

  She waited.

  Nothing.

  Silence.

  She got her answer. “I see.”

  Julia was seething. “You said it yourself. She’s my family, not yours.”

  “You did, too. Your words, too, Julia. You got Kathryn. I got Mae, the only difference is that I lived with her, and she turned you and Erica against me. She chose to love you and Erica, but she never loved me.”

  “Kathryn told me about her agreement with Mae. Mae got you, and Kathryn got us. It was agreed upon, but Mae took forever to get her life in order, so Kathryn took care of you. You should be grateful—”

  “Of what?”

  “Jake—” Kate coughed from behind them. “Maybe you and I should go and start up another poker game.”

  Jake glanced between the two sisters. “Maybe we should.”

  Kate and Jake disappeared, and Dani shot back,”It doesn’t have to be either/or in our family. Why am I the only one who gets that? It never had to be like that.”

  Julia quieted, but her neck was red.

  “You wanna know where that even came from?” Dani cried out. “From our mother.”

  “Don’t talk about her. She doesn’t deserve to have her memory dragged through the mud.”

  “She visited Sandra O’Hara. It was our grandmother who told her what to do, to even talk to Mae about having me.” Dani’s laugh was empty, even to her own ears. “She took advice from a crazy woman. Okay. She’s more broken than crazy, but still crazy. Stubborn, too.”

  “Grandmom is dead. Kathryn told us that.”

  “No.” She really wasn’t. Dani shook her head. “I’ve seen her three times now.”

  Julia jerked backwards and held her hands up. She was shaking her head. “I can’t do this, not now. I can’t—” She choked off her words. The fight left her. Her shoulders dropped down. Her head hung low. Her hands fell back to her side.

  “Did you know that our grandfather was married?” Dani kept going. Maybe it was because she wanted to stick it to her sister that she knew more than the all-knowing Julia did. Maybe it was because her sister liked to stick her head in the sand, but she couldn’t this time. There was evidence. People were still living. Julia wouldn’t be able to deny them away. Or maybe she was saying all this because she was sick of being the only one to hold it? Maybe it was time they stopped perpetuating the cycle?

  “Stop it, Dani!” Her head flared back up. Her eyes were wide with
panic. “I can’t listen to this right now. Not when—Kathryn is dying. She needs me.” She rushed back inside, the door slamming shut behind her.

  Dani was left alone, a flamingo perched on her head.

  “Hey.”

  She turned around and saw Jonah perched on the steps. “Hey.” She touched the flamingo. “I thought for a second Fancy Nancy came alive, or I’ve embraced the crazy gene in my family and started to hear voices.”

  Jonah chuckled dryly as he moved up the stairs and leaned next to her. He hoisted himself up on the railing, then lifted Dani to sit next to him. His hands lingered on her waist before removing his arm around her back. She studied him, seeing the pain in his eyes, the bags under them, and the slight crinkle around his mouth. She didn’t think they looked like they were there from smiling or laughing.

  She offered her drink. “You look like you could use this more than me.”

  He took it, giving her a half-grin. “Are you sure?” He gestured inside where Julia had gone. “Another one of these and I’m thinking you could go for round two.”

  His hands were resting on his lap, so she reached and lifted one, lacing their fingers together. “How’d your thing go with your dad?”

  Bullseye.

  Jonah’s lip curled upward, amused at some irony that was lost on Dani. “Your fight with your sister was refreshing.” Jonah chuckled again, a twinge of bitterness laced with it. “Beats the superficialness of my family. Aiden just—she lied right through her teeth when we dropped off our dad at Robbie’s. He loved the house, said he’s going to come more often to visit.”

  “You think he is?”

  “No. We know our lies. Everyone knows them, but we’re fake anyway. You and Julia, you guys don’t get what’s between you. It’s refreshing.”

  She didn’t understand that, but at that moment, Jonah needed it to be about him. She looked down to the ground, knowing this next part could be painful. “Jonah, about…”

  “Before?”

  “Yeah. About before—”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “For what?” Dani lifted her head.

  “I pushed you. I’m sorry.”

  “Oh.” Her shoulders shook in a silent laugh. “Everyone seems to be pushing someone today.”

  “Who were you pushing?”

  “My grandma.”

  Jonah nodded. She already filled him in on her visits, and he squeezed her hand. “How’d that go?”

  “Not good. Horrible, actually. I found out my grandmother and grandfather were cheating bastards, and there’s some type of curse on our family. The fathers keep leaving, but come back to get the moms pregnant again. Happened to Sandra. Happened to my mom.” She hoped it wouldn’t happen to her. “Probably a good thing none of us have had children yet, huh?”

  His laugh was soft, but sad.

  She looked at him, studying his side profile as he was gazing out into the distance. “Why’d you push me earlier?”

  “It’s not important.”

  But it was. She felt it in her chest. It was so important, and she needed him to say it again. She was salivating for the chance. She wanted to reassure him, and this time she felt it in her heart. She knew she wasn’t going anywhere. She wanted him to see it in her eyes, that she meant every single word.

  She whispered now, “Ask me. Ask me again.”

  His eyes met hers, narrowing slightly. He was looking into her, reading her.

  She was letting him. There was no wall, no hesitation this time. She wanted him to know her, not just her body. All of her. A second passed. He was still searching in her. Another second. More. He waited a full thirty before asking, his voice so soft and tender, “What would you do if you found out another person cared about you? If you mattered to one more person?”

  “Nothing.” She was trying to convey her feelings through her eyes. She wanted him to know so badly. “I wouldn’t run. I wouldn’t walk. I wouldn’t hide. I’d do nothing except stand and embrace it.”

  His eyes darkened, an emotion passed in them, one that had her heart beating so fast again. “Yeah?” He let go of her hand, but touched the side of her face. He held her in the palm of his hand, and his thumb rubbed over her cheek. It was like he was smoothing away any lingering worries she might have. “What if I was that person?”

  She leaned toward him, her eyes going from his lips back to his gaze. Both were pulling her in, making her yearn for more. “Then I’d say, I feel the same.” Her breath held in her throat. They were talking in code, but it was out now. She was telling him how she felt, and a second later, his lips were on hers.

  This. She turned, wound her arms around his neck. This was everything.

  It started raining.

  Both were soaked, and Jonah held her hand as they dashed inside. People watched as they moved through the house. A few had a smart comment to share.

  Dani was quiet, merely holding Jonah’s hand.

  Kelley Lynn was right. Kate was right. Their community adored Jonah. The men slapped him on the back with a dirty remark about their wetness. And the women took note of who held his hand. Dani caught more than a few pissed off women, wrinkling their noses and curling their lips in a scowl.

  Well. Any secrecy that Dani thought they had was gone now. They were officially a couple. Ducking upstairs, Jonah pulled her into Aiden and Bubba’s room. Quilts were strewn across the room, over tables, and even on the floor.

  Dani crossed to the window and watched the rain. It was a downpour. It looked like a full sheet was draped over the house, like it could be cut through with a knife. “It’s really coming down, huh?” Then she surveyed the room. “Something tells me that Robbie’s master bedroom doesn’t exactly compare to this room.”

  Jonah searched inside Bubba’s closet. “Probably not.” His voice was muffled until he produced a T-shirt and a clean pair of boxers. He laid them on the bed, briskly pulling his drenched shirt off, hanging it over the counter in the bathroom. “I’m going to have to wear my wet jeans. I don’t exactly measure up to Bubba’s size.”

  Dani tracked the water on his chest, his glorious and golden and muscled chest. All. The. Way. Down. His jeans cut off her view. His hands were there, and he paused. She was waiting, trying not to lick her lips. He still didn’t undo them, and her eyes jerked to his. He was watching her. No laughter. His gaze was dark, almost smoldering, and she felt her body starting to quiver in response.

  She lost the battle. Her tongue darted out, wetting her lips.

  He groaned. “You’re killing me, Dani.”

  “Sorry.” She wasn’t.

  His voice grew hoarse, like it was work for him to speak. “Stop looking at me, or I’m coming over there.”

  Her voice matched his. “We’re in your sister’s bedroom.”

  “I’m starting not to give a damn.”

  They couldn’t. Nope. But she wanted to. They needed another topic, and then she remembered. “Your family.”

  “What about them?”

  “What happened with your dad?”

  “You want to talk about my dad? Right now?” He sounded incredulous, his eyebrows arching up.

  “It’s either that or everyone’s going to know we’re doing something else up here.”

  He closed his eyes. His hand caught and held his neck, and his head fell back. “Shit. You’re right. Okay. My dad. You want to know about him.” Then he groaned, unzipping his pants.

  Dani sat up, but bit down on her lip. She would not say anything to interrupt this. She would not do anything to stop him