Ruled By Rabbits, Page 2

  *thump*

  “Shhh, the neighbours don’t need to know you’re having a meltdown,” Mom said. “What’s wrong?”

  “The fly!” Dusty said and looked at the fly, who surprisingly wasn’t fazed by all the thumping.

  Mom got her eyes to focus. She looked at the fly and then back at Dusty.

  “That? The fly?”

  Dusty nodded. “I had to warn you.”

  Mom rubbed her eyes and stretched. “It’s a fly.”

  “But he isn’t supposed to be here!” Dusty insisted.

  Mom had to agree. “Can’t argue that.”

  Mom and Dusty stared at each other for a minute.

  “I did my part, “Dusty said. “You’re the adult – make the fly go away.”

  Mom sighed and “shooed” the fly out the window.

  Dusty flopped. “That was close.”

  “Good night, bunnies,” Mom said and made her way back to bed.

  Dusty smiled to herself, knowing she had protected her home from the intruder.

  DUSTY’S DILEMMA

  “Why don’t they take me seriously?” Dusty asked Hopper.

  Hopper stopped chewing her hay. “Have you ever actually seen how you look when you do it?”

  “Well, no …,” Dusty said.

  Hopper sighed. “I hate to admit it, but it is pretty cute.”

  Dusty was mad. “It’s not meant to be cute. It’s meant to get their attention.”

  “Well, it does,” Hopper said.

  “Yes, but Mom and Dad stand there and smile and laugh and point,” Dusty grumbled. “I want them to know I am mad when I chew on my cage.”

  “Then you have to look mad,” Hopper said. “You’ve seen me do it. Heck, I tug so hard on the bars I let go and fall backwards!”

  Dusty planted her feet and started to gnaw on the cage.

  Her floppy ears toppled from side to side as she alternated chewing on the left and the right. Her furry cheeks puffed out, making her look like a stuffed toy. And the lack of actual noise didn’t help her cause much.

  “Well?” she asked Hopper.

  Hopper sighed. “If they made a stuffed toy that looked like you chewing your cage, it would be a best seller with kids – adorable!”

  “I failed!” Dusty cried and flopped over.

  Mom walked into the living room. “Aw Dust Bunny, you’re too sweet! I love when you flop!”

  Dusty covered her eyes with her paws. “I’m cursed with cuddlability!”

  MUSICAL CHAIRS

  “Dust Bunny,” Mom said. “Time to watch our TV show.”

  Dusty loved to watch TV with Mom.

  Dusty hopped along behind Mom. Dusty watched as Mom sat in her usual chair, the blue comforter underneath her. Dusty took her place under the chair, within petting range.

  When the first commercial break came, Mom got up to get a glass of water.

  The light grey lop hopped onto the chair, moving the blanket around till it was perfect.

  Dusty was still sitting on the chair when Mom got back, so Mom sat on the chair in front of the computer.

  As the show continued on, Dusty needed to use her litter box.

  Mom moved back to her chair.

  Dusty re-entered the living room, seeing Mom in the chair, she returned to her spot under the chair.

  At the next commercial Mom went to get a banana for a snack and Dusty resumed her time on the chair.

  On the way back to the living room, Mom gave Hopper and Cola a slice and then hand-delivered a slice to Dusty.

  “You sure do love that chair,” Mom said and gave Dusty a noserub.

  “No, Mom,” Dusty said. “I love you and since this is your chair, I love it too!”

  Mom smiled. “I think you should stay there for the rest of our show.”

  “OK, Mom,” Dusty agreed and snuggled into the blanket.

  Dusty was always so easy to get along with.

  COLA

  COLA VS THE CURTAINS

  Cola is pretty sure they do it on purpose.

  They don’t reach the carpet so when she hides behind them (“them” being the curtains that hang on the patio door), Mom and Dad can still see her paws. Cola doesn't want Mom and Dad to see her and the curtains just refuse to co-operate! And when she wants to look out the patio door, there they are – in the way, blocking her view – and she has to push them out of the way but they just bounce right back!

  The curtains don’t bother Duster at all … but they sure do irritate Cola!

  Sometimes she sneaks up on them and will head butt them! That’ll teach the curtains to get in her way.

  Other times she just walks right up and bites them! Yes, Cola is fierce! She gets a good hold on them and pulls … but no matter how hard she tries, no matter how scary she is the curtains won’t leave!

  Oh well … Cola will just to learn to exist with them … at least she has Duster to console her when the curtains get on her last furry (and adorable) nerve!

  GRANDPA AND GRANDMA'S FIRST VISIT

  “Who are these people and why did they interrupt our nap?”

  “Who is that lady sitting in Mom’s chair?”

  Duster and Cola were cautious coming out of their cages that morning and they bee-lined it for Mommy’s chair. They like to cuddle under there and this new lady wasn’t going to interfere with their cuddle time!

  Mom and Dad seemed pretty happy to see them but Cola was still going to be cautious. She decided to investigate so she crept up beside the lady and stared at her. SHE IGNORED COLA! Hmmm … Cola went back to Duster and snuggled up to him, pouting slightly - how could anyone ignore her?

  Mom was sitting on the floor and Cola watched her get up and go to the kitchen (surely this meant treats for the bunnies!). When she came back in, she had something in her hands (cups of coffee as Cola heard the lady thank Mom for it) She gave one to the lady and one to the man and she had nothing for the bunnies!

  OK, these two were soon going to be on the same level of irritation as the curtains!

  Duster and Cola decided to move to the other chair the man was sitting in. Cola heard him say their names and then he tried to pet the bunnies! They moved out of his reach and cuddled close to each other.

  “Cola, Duster, come out and say hi to Grandpa and Grandma,” Mom said.

  Grandpa and Grandma! So that’s who they were. Mom and Dad talked to them all the time on the phone and they always said “Duster and Cola, Grandma and Grandpa say good bye.”

  Well, why don’t they say goodbye now and let us get back to our naps? Cola wanted to ask.

  And where were the presents they usually sent for the bunnies? Mom and Dad always brought home something for them when they went to visit Grandpa and Grandma – timothy hay, their favourite bunny treats, something! How dare they show up empty handed!

  Cola would have nothing to do with them and retreated to the corner of the room, waiting for Duster to join her.

  But Duster was getting brave! He walked right up to Grandpa and nudged his legs! He did it twice!

  Grandpa laughed and told Duster he was a good boy!

  “Wait a second …,” Cola thought. “I'm a good girl! Hello! Grandpa! I’m a good girl!”

  She still wouldn’t get too close though but she left her corner and sat behind Grandma’s chair. Duster came to join her and she checked him over, making sure there were no grandparent germs on him!

  Eventually they went back to their cages and Mom and Dad and the grandparents went out to do some shopping.

  Better have something for us when they get back, Cola thought.

  When they returned Mom and Dad let the bunnies out of their cages again and Grandma took some pictures of them.

  And then Dad showed the bunnies the salt licks Grandpa and Grandma got for them!! Duster and Cola were so excited! They can come back and visit us anytime they want! Grandparents are great … especially when they bring presents!

  “We love you Grandpa and Grandma!” Cola and Duster exclai
med.

  WEEKEND WARRIORS

  It’s so cute how humans think bunnies adjust to their schedule – Cola is sure her bunny buddies will agree it is the opposite - the humans adjust to the bunnies' schedules!

  Duster and Cola love the weekend. They spend most of their time out of their cages during the week but they get even more free range time on the weekends. Oh yeah and Mom and Dad are both home on the weekend. Sometimes they get this silly idea to sleep in … really doesn’t fit in with Cola and Duster’s schedule and, well, they resort to any means necessary to make sure their parents are up and the bunnies are out of their cages asap!

  For example, any given Saturday …

  Cola stretches and looks over at Duster. “No sign of Mom or Dad yet?”

  Duster shakes his head, helicopter ears all over the place.

  Hmmm … does Cola be nice and let them get more sleep … nah! They can have a nap this afternoon, which means bunny sleepover for her and Duster (when Mom and Dad let the bunnies sleep in their bedroom with them).

  Cola starts to chew on her cage. She pauses.. No sounds from the parents room. She chews some more … wait … nothing. She chews again, really putting her heart in to it … pause … nothing! They must be ignoring her.

  Next step … picking up and dropping her bowl full of pellets.

  Bang!

  Nothing.

  Bang! Bang!

  Nothing.

  Now Cola is getting mad. How dare they ignore her! That’s it – game on!

  Duster finds this whole process amusing … he’ll thank her when Mom and Dad are up and they are binkying around the living room!

  Bring on the toss toy!

  Cola slams it down on the floor of her cage … and listen … and oh, she thinks she hears movement!

  She bangs it again … definitely heard something …

  It’s Daddy’s voice (she love my Daddy) … “Cola, stop it … “

  Stop it?

  Oh now she is mad - Daddy is in cahoots with the curtains!!

  Slam! Bang! Whack goes the toss toy!

  Now Cola knows for sure she hears them getting up … out comes Mom … cage door is open … and she takes the toss toy!!

  And then she goes back to bed.

  How dare they?

  Duster is too busy eating his hay to notice Cola's fur getting bent out of shape.

  “Psssst, Duster, I think you need more hay,” she tell him.

  “More hay? Cola, I have a whole pile of it!” he replies.

  “Oh come on, wouldn’t it be nice if Mom would bring you some more fresh hay?”

  Now he’s on board! When Duster wants more hay he digs at the floor of his cage where Mom always puts his hay.

  Digging! Both of the bunnies digging at their cages!

  Here come Mom AND Dad ….

  Then Duster starts with his “triple threat of cuteness” as Mom calls it … you can see his blog for a full description of this … and she can never be mad at him, especially when he does his grand finale flop!

  Gosh, they sure are taking their sweet time … Dad comes and opens Cola's cage and then Duster’s and … yippee they won –the bunnies are free to binky!

  Bunnies 1, parents 0

  COLA'S FUR

  “Mom we have to talk.”

  “OK, Cola, just a minute, let Mommy send this e-mail …”

  “No, Mommy, NOW!” and Cola thumped her foot.

  Mommy turned to look at the black dwarf bunny. Seeing she had her Mom's full attention Cola told her they have a very serious problem and she needed to go to the vet.

  Mom was very concerned, seeing as Cola had just recently been spayed.

  “Are you not feeling well?

  “Mom, I am mad!”

  “What are you mad about, Bear?”

  Cola stood up on my back legs so Mom could see her belly.

  Nothing registered on Mom's face. Didn’t she get it?

  “Mom, look at my belly!!”

  Still nothing.

  “Mom, the vet stole my fur!”

  “What” she asked Cola.

  Hello – was she blind? Right there before her eyes, the bald spot on the bunny's stomach where only a few days ago her spectacular black fur had been (yes, Cola admits she is a diva when it comes to her fur).

  “Mom, the vet stole my fur.” Cola persisted. “I want it back.”

  She could tell Mom was trying to find the right words to tell her something.

  “Well, Cola they didn’t steal your fur … they had to shave your belly so they could do your spay.”

  “No one asked my permission to shave my belly! I didn’t sign anything! Get the car! We are going to the vet to get my fur!” Cola hopped towards the door.

  Mom wasn’t moving.

  Oh my gosh …

  “Mom, did you sign something saying they could steal my fur?”

  Mom sighed. “Cola, yes paperwork was signed so they could do your spay, which meant they had to shave your belly …”

  Cola cut her off. “You knew they were going to shave my fur??”

  “Yes.”

  Cola thumped her way back over to where Mom sat.

  “Was the fee for shaving my fur included in the fee for the spay?”

  “Of course.”

  Even worse Mom paid them to steal her fur!

  “Cola Bear …”

  “Uh huh, you do not deserve the privilege of petting MY fur!”

  Later on that week …. Mom and Dad went out to run some errands and when they got back Cola noticed Mom’s fur on top of her head (she hears them call it hair sometimes) was shorter. Cola was vindicated! Daddy knew Mommy paid the vet to steal her fur so he took her somewhere to get her fur cut. He was pretty smart about it too … he kept telling her it looked really nice cut short like that!

  (Obviously Mom and Cola have since made up but sometimes Cola still misses that fur …)

  THE GROWLER

  “Good night every bunny.”

  And Mom was off to bed.

  Duster and Cola were circling the living room … Cola took a run towards the bedroom door and discovered Mom had left it open just a crack!

  She stuck my nose in and looked around … dark … and there was Mommy curled up under the blankets.

  Then Cola heard it!

  “Grrrr …..honnnk …. chuuuu ….”

  What was that?

  Cola ran to tell Duster there was something in the room with Mommy. They both agreed – they had to find out what it was and warn Mommy. They need her in one piece for bunny breakfast after all!

  Duster and Cola ran back to the bedroom door, Cola went first …

  Nothing.

  “Duster, come on … it’s in here somewhere!”

  Cola climbed up on the bed near the pillows and Duster climbed up near Mommy’s feet.

  They started to move the blankets around.

  “Grrrr …..honnnk …. chuuuu ….”

  Duster and Cola both jumped … it was close by! How did they both miss seeing it???

  “It’s a Growler,” Cola declared.

  “What’s a Growler?” Duster asked.

  How did he not know what a Growler is??

  “Oh, Duster … it is a monster that attacks bunny parents when they are sleeping and tries to stop them from serving bunny breakfast in the morning!”

  Duster’s eyes got big. “It’s attacking Mommy???”

  Cola nodded, Mom must be unconscious not to hear the Growler!

  “Grrrr …..honnnk …. chuuuu ….”

  There is was again!

  Cola jumped off the bed to check near the laundry baskets while Duster stood watch (OK he actually laid down beside Mom and worked on rearranging the blankets).

  Nothing behind the laundry baskets or the dressers … time for Cola to check the closet.

  As she was hopping my way to the closet, Mom rolled over and we again heard the Growler.

  “Grrrr …..honnnk …. chuuuu ….”

  Duster p
ut his paws on Mommy’s chin and stared at her …

  “Grrrr …..honnnk …. chuuuu ….”

  No way!

  “COLA!!” Duster thumped. “The Growler is INSIDE Mommy!!!”

  Cola forgot the closet and jumped back up on the bed – both of them staring at Mom … “Grrrr …..honnnk …. chuuuu ….”

  They were two bunnies that didn’t know what to do …

  Then the bedroom door quietly opened and in came Daddy – he would know what to do!

  Daddy laughed because they were both staring at Mommy, she sure does snore loudly!

  (UPDATE: Mommy is OK after the Growler/snoring incident and she shared shared bunny breakfast the next morning as usual!!).

  OOGA BOOGA

  “OOGA BOOGA”

  Mom seems to think those should be the “scariest” words in the world to Cola and Duster. Mom started to say “ooga booga” to them a little while ago when she would round the bunnies up to get them back to their cages so she could go to bed. Mommy admits she isn’t sure why she started to say “ooga booga” but it has stuck.

  However, Cola and Duster translate those words to mean something different than what Mom does *insert cute bunny snicker here*

  9:00 PM, any given week night, Mom wants to go to bed:

  “Bunnies, time for bed,” Mom will say and move the chair Duster and Cola like to cuddle under.

  Duster and Cola stretch, looking so cute but they don’t make a move towards their cages.

  “Come on bunnies. Good bunnies go to bed when Mommy does!”

  They’re not convinced that it’s really time for her to go to bed yet.

  “Ready, Duster?” Cola asks.

  Duster stretches again …

  “Come on, bunnies … good bunnies … let’s head towards your cages.”

  Sure thing, Mom, right on that...

  Duster and Cola slowly start to hop towards their respective cages … oh hey, see that over there?

  And they are off … under the TV stand … under the desk … under the various chairs in the living room …

  “Ooga booga, bunnies!” Mom says.

  “Duster, hear that?” Cola asks. “Mom says she feels like running a few laps before bed!”

  Well she does sit at a desk all day … it is their responsibility as good bunny children to ensure their parents get some form of exercise every day!