(Mis)Trust

  (mis)TRUST

  Sarah Ann Walker

  Also by Author Sarah Ann Walker

  I am HER…

  THIS is me…

  We are US...

  My Dear Stranger

  LOST

  Choices…

  Copyright © 2016 (071716-1) Sarah Ann Walker

  Cover Design: James Freeburg

  All rights reserved.

  ISBN-13: 978-0-9917231-6-4

  This book is a work of fiction. Any reference to real people, or real locales are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  (mis)TRUST

  DEDicaTION

  To Jakkob

  You are absolutely everything I love in this life.

  Xo

  Mommy

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  James, thank you for another amazing book cover.

  To my parents, thank you for not bugging me too much for not calling you back when I’m all up in my head writing.

  Brennah, thank you for giving me my handsome nephew Zakkary, and my 2 beautiful nieces Piper-Ireland and Teaghan.

  Paola, thank you for being my longest, dearest friend.

  Silvana, thank you for still making me laugh- the WW is for you.

  Sam, thank you for being my BBE- Best Brit Ever. (This Scots for you!)

  Amy, I look forward to my ass grabs in Michigan.

  Samantha, thank you for our read-alongs, I love our time together.

  Rachelle, thank you for being an extraordinary pimping support to me.

  Brenda, thank you for still holding my hand. I miss you.

  Randi Newman, thank you for your amazing support with this book, and for your constant, beautiful friendship. You are my most special stalker turned dearest friend ever, and I love you and Mike to pieces.

  Please tell Mike he finally got an awesome cameo. xo

  Katica, thank you for your invaluable input with this story-

  Everyone has you to thank for the ending.

  Thank you Deniro, Kim, Megan, Dawn, MTO Diane, Raven, Michelle, Carla, Glenda, Alanna, Samantha, Suzanne, Elizabeth, Shabby & Laura

  Thank you to Darcy, Diana, Amy, Julianne, Jamie and the Twisted Sisters, Lustful Literature, Hashtag Minxes Love Books,

  Triple M Books and The Diva’s Book Lounge Group

  to name a few…

  I want to thank all the readers, friends, and bloggers who have supported me these last 3 years and 7 books. I wish I could name you all.

  xo

  Sarah

  Introduction

  The Past

  The Present

  The Future

  Author’s Bio

  Music List

  Alex Clare- Too Close

  Lady Gaga- Bad Romance

  Imagine Dragons- Demons

  Mumford and Sons- I Will Wait

  Franz Ferdinand- Take Me Out

  Of Mice and Men- Little Talks

  Fun- We Are Young

  Lumineers- Ho Hey

  Depeche Mode- Somebody

  Depeche Mode- A Question Of Lust

  Pearl Jam- Rearview Mirror

  INTRODUCTION

  Feeling Tyler's lips suddenly against the side of my neck, I jump in my chair and playfully swat him away. I have to study and he knows... Ahhhhhh.

  "Ty... Oh. Right there," I moan as his hands start massaging the back of my neck. Feeling my shoulders kissed as my t-shirt lowers, I groan when he rubs my tense neck a little harder. "I have to study," I practically gasp when I feel his tongue work back up the side of my neck to my ear.

  When he whispers, "I just need 2 minutes, Lovey," I smirk to myself. 2 minutes? Tyler has never been only 2 minutes, but...

  "2 minutes?" I turn my head as his hands slide around my neck to hold me close to his mouth. Kissing me softly, Tyler grins an uh huh as I open for his tongue. Okay, I can spare 2 minutes I decide as I tug his head down harder to my mouth.

  Suddenly pulled from my desk chair with his hand holding the back of my head to the floor, he crawls over me. Moving my legs, Tyler is between them instantly lifting my back as we kiss until my t-shirt is removed when we part lips briefly.

  Grinding against me, Tyler takes me from my old, dirty library books to arousal in seconds. Pulling away from my lips, Tyler lowers himself to my chest as his hips continue to grind against me.

  Taking my nipple through my ugly off-white bra, I'm sucked in deep through the cotton until my legs spread wider and my back arches closer. Feeling his hand trail down my stomach to the waistband of my track pants I'm already panting. Feeling him slide inside to touch my pussy I'm nearly gasping. When he abandons my chest to move down my body I lift as he pulls my pants and underwear with him as he lowers.

  Crying out, Tyler is just shy of too much when I feel a finger push deep inside me just as his tongue lashes at me. "Okay..." I breathe between moans. "You can have 5 minutes," I sigh before feeling him huff a little laugh right against my dampening body.

  Closing my eyes, I take in the pleasure. My body has been tight with stress and worry, and my mind has been filled with so much information, I often wonder how I possibly retain as much knowledge as I do. I've been so mentally overwhelmed lately, these moments between me and Tyler are all that seem to ground me. He is always here for me, and he always seems to know when I need to be distracted from the workload and pressure.

  Tyler knows me, knows when I need him, and he always loves me harder when I need it.

  "I love you," I whisper as the familiar stirring of an orgasm takes me over.

  Pulling his hair to keep him tight against my body, I writhe against his face feeling the growing pull deep inside me. I'm not going to take much longer and I'm looking forward to the temporary release of the pressure I’m under.

  Working my body, Tyler knows exactly what to do with his tongue and fingers to make me come undone. He knows where to touch me inside and how much pressure to use outside. He knows where I love his tongue against me and he knows what I need to be relieved.

  Arching, my body starts grinding back against him as the pressure builds. I'm so close, my words are now muffled, incoherent and nearly pleading. My legs are shaking and my mind is fading as the urgency increases.

  Crying out my release against his mouth, Tyler works me a little longer to try to keep me going until I exhale my final groan of pleasure. When my hands fall from his hair to drop on the floor he knows my orgasm is over. He would know anyway, but Tyler always jokes when he hears the thump of my hands on the floor and the physical relief of not having his hair yanked out of his head I'm finally done.

  "Your 5 minutes is up," I say as seriously as I can until I look down at Tyler's stunned face. Laughing at his expression, my throat is a little hoarse though I feel so much lighter than I did only minutes ago.

  "I. Don't. Think. So," he says laughing as he moves my thighs wider to advance on me. Kissing my mouth, I take in my own taste and scent and pull him harder into me when he makes penetration. Back and forth he enters and retreats until settled in deep we stop kissing for a moment to look at each other with our Tyler/Saige eyes as everyone refers to them.

  "I love you," he kisses me slow and softly. "But it’s your turn to do some work," he laughs flipping us quickly as I gasp.

  Suddenly on top, my hair swings on my shoulders and my hands plant on his chest when I settle on him deeply. Moving and lifting, I know what Tyler likes and I know how to move for him. Tightening my internal muscles as I lean my pelvis back and rise, Tyler always squeezes my thighs with his hands from the pleasure he receives. When I lift slowly off but crash back down Tyler always arches under me.


  Opening his eyes, Tyler begs, "Let me get you off again."

  "No," I moan. "I'm good," I smile as he groans when I ride him a little harder and faster.

  Though I'm very much enjoying this sexy distraction, I don't have time for Tyler to try to coax another orgasm from me. A second orgasm always takes longer to achieve, and an orgasm during actual sex usually takes much time and effort for both of us- time I don't have right now.

  "Come here, Lovey," he whispers until I move toward his mouth.

  Kissing Tyler, I feel his gentle hands caressing my back and I know everything amazing between us. Tyler is always playful in the bedroom, sometimes even a little adventurous, but he always calms by the end to show me his love with his hands. Tyler's hands are always careful, almost a gentle caress of devotion before he finishes inside me. It's his last act before I know he's ready to release, and I always wait for his hands to pet me softly before I feel everything he doesn't need to say flow deep inside me.

  Riding out Tyler's coming storm, I close my eyes, move faster and harder, but feel the softness of his hands on my back telling me he loves me.

  Watching his neck suddenly arch as his chest pumps up and down, he breathes in harsh gasps until I know the end for him. Opening his eyes quickly, he stares at me with his hard intensity just as I feel the orgasm leave his body. He is coming quietly, groaning softly, but staring at me like he's giving me every part of himself that he possibly can.

  Moving down to rest on his chest during his last pants and thrusts, his arms wrap around me tightly. Tyler is so much larger than I am, I've always loved how tightly he holds me after sex.

  Exhaling my tension and the physical exertion of the last 20 minutes, I'm distracted and happy. I know no matter what happens with my exam or my future I'll always have this life with Tyler.

  Leaning into my hair, Tyler teases, "You really need to stop distracting me when you have to study, Saige."

  Huffing a laugh against his sweaty chest, I ask, "With my sweat pants and ripped t-shirt?" Nodding, he mock glares at me pushing a piece of my hair behind my ear before he kisses my lips again softly.

  "When are you leaving for work?"

  "Soon. But when I come back tonight I don't want to see you sitting in the same chair hunched over the desk, okay? You need to take breaks, Saige," Tyler says just firmly enough to make me listen without sounding like an annoying parent.

  "I will. Thanks for this break, but I really need to get back to it now that I'm all relaxed and calm," I rise on my arms and kiss him deeply once more.

  "I can always relax and calm you again tonight when I get home," he grins with the dirty look I love.

  "I look forward to it," I kiss him again.

  Standing, I look down his body once while he stares at my body with more hunger. "Perv..." I grin as he smiles up at me.

  "For you? Always..." he laughs as I walk away shaking my ass for him.

  *****

  Hopping in the shower, I need to get back to my studies. I need to enjoy this release from all the pressure I'm under, at least for as long as it lasts.

  "I'll be home around midnight," Tyler says behind the shower curtain before throwing it open quickly to shower. Taking the shower head from my hand, he rinses his body and hands it back to me. Moving me against the tile wall he kisses me deeply one last time before stepping out.

  "Love you, Lovey," he grins waiting for my usual goodbye.

  "Bye, Ty," I smile before finishing my shower.

  The Past

  CHAPTER 1

  Leaving for the library, Tyler stops me with a deep kiss in the hallway. Dropping my bag to wrap my arms around his neck, I lean in and take all he can give me. Desperately, I kiss him as he holds my head close and my waist even closer.

  After forever, Tyler pulls away with a little grin. "Just thought you needed another distraction."

  "I always need your distractions," I snuggle in deep.

  Hugging me tightly, Tyler asks, "When will you be home from the lecture?"

  "Just after 7. Then I'll get down to studying again. What are you doing this afternoon?"

  "I'll study a little, then go to the gym before work. But I'll be home by 11 to kiss you goodnight."

  "Good. I'm going to need a little Tyler tonight," I say seriously until I notice his smirk and realize what I said. "Not THAT little Tyler," I burst out laughing as he does. "Well, maybe," I grin pushing my ass into him when I bend over to pick up my nap sack.

  "Enjoy the library," he groans rubbing my ass. "And don't let Handle stress you out. You're going to kill this exam, Lovey."

  "Let's hope," I whisper when he kisses the back of my head again before I leave.

  *****

  Oh, pleeeeeease. Why do I hit every red light in the entire city when I'm screwed for time? Why? Murphy's Law? The fates? Why the hell am I so hated by the Universe?

  Peeling around the neighborhood I can't believe I might be late. I can NOT believe I might actually miss the intro of my final exam.

  How the hell could I have possibly over-studied in the library? Isn't that like the lamest excuse any student has ever given since the beginning of time? Well, other than my dog ate my homework, I think

  'I lost track of time because I was studying too hard' is the second lamest excuse. No matter what I say though, Professor Handle will only nod and turn his back should I actually attempt to explain, which really, he won't let me anyway.

  God, I'm so screwed.

  Parking as close as I can to the lecture hall, I run for my life. Professor Handle is a notorious hardass, and he loves closing the lecture hall doors at exactly one minute after. Christ, he even smiles at students running for the lecture hall before he closes the heavy doors in their faces. And god forbid the poor student who doesn't know the rule of the closed door- they’re screwed for the rest of the semester. Once they open the door, they are asked their name, then they're asked to leave, and Professor Handle never forgets a name or a face.

  Rounding Traynor Hall I'm seconds from the... NO!!! Skidding to a stop mere feet from the doors, I'm done. Goddamnit, it’s closed.

  Leaning against the wall to catch my breath, I can only hope Kyle took notes he'll scan me later. I can hope, and though note-taking isn't one of his greatest attributes it's my only option for the pre-exam lecture notes for my final tomorrow. Looking down the hall, I see one other girl I recognize from class leaning, nope, actually banging the back of her head against the wall like I want to right now. Shit.

  Walking back to my car totally nauseous, I feel freaked out but refuse to stress any further, or worse yet, burst into tears from the pressure. I screwed up, but I need to focus on studying and wait for Kyle to get home so I can beg for his notes. I have to relax and go home and cry on Tyler's shoulder until he makes me feel better. That's all I can do.

  Exiting the building I see another late student suddenly stop running when he recognizes me.

  Giving a pitiful, you're totally screwed face, he shakes his head and huffs, "The construction on Kennedy Street?"

  "Nope. Over-studied," I practically groan.

  "Shitty..." he nods solemnly.

  Giving each other a last sad smile, we acknowledge we're screwed and walk in opposite directions from the Traynor building.

  I can't believe I did this. I can't believe by studying for the most important exam I'll ever write I've missed the most important pre-exam lecture to the most important exam I'll ever write in my life.

  •••••

  Stopping for a coffee on my way home, I need the caffeine so I'm sharp while studying tonight. I need the buzz and I need the clarity. This exam is all about memorization which means I need to remember all the little cases and the obscure legal facts and dates Handle threw at us all semester. God knows he would never put the famous Roe vs. Wade on the final- he'd consider that an insult to our collective intelligence.

  Coffee in hand, almost home, Tyler told me he'd be studying a little for his own exam in a few da
ys before leaving for work, and I really hope I see him before he's left- I need to see him before he leaves. Once he's gone, I know I'll have our apartment to myself to pull a semi-allnighter before I wake up after 5 hours of sleep to review before the biggest exam of my life.

  This is not a tragedy, I have to keep telling myself. This is a little hiccup, and Tyler will say something wonderful and supportive to make me calm down, and then I'll get down to studying. Things could be much worse, I know that. I just need to focus and adjust to my exam cram reality, and hopefully to Kyle's decent notes in a few hours.

  Man, having your entire future mapped out based on one exam percentage is way too stressful.

  *****

  Walking in our door I'm surprised by the loud dance music playing in the living room. Tyler said he was going to be cramming until he left- not that our definitions of cramming are the same. But still, blasting music throughout our whole apartment seems a little counter-productive.

  "Ty?" Calling out he doesn't even acknowledge me over the music. "Tyler?"

  Probably studying at our desk, he usually listens to classical music before an exam. He once read classical music makes you retain more information, so this techno pop crap is not his usual choice, nor mine for that matter.

  "Tyler? You'll never guess what I did. I..."

  I freeze.

  Gasping, I can't even move.

  With my hand still holding our bedroom door, all I see are his hands on her back. Watching her ride him, I'm stunned staring at his hands gently running up and down her back.