Effortless, Page 4

Chapter 4

 

  Gossip

  I woke up the next morning far earlier than I'd intended to. A small flutter of nerves in my stomach told me that I was doing something potentially embarrassing today. I pushed the feeling back as I sat up. Unlike the dream I'd just awoken from, I wouldn't be tripping in front of the class today. No, the only sort of embarrassment I'd feel was walking the halls with a rock star. I was pretty sure Kellan would feel the need to walk with me to my first class, like I was a Kindergartener going to school for the first time, but that was okay. Having him beside me drew all of the attention to him, and he didn't mind being everyone's focal point.

  Looking around his empty bedroom, I wondered where the rock star was. Standing, I slipped on my underwear and grabbed one of his t-shirts from his drawer. It smelled amazing as I slipped it over my head and I briefly considered wearing it to school with me. My first class today was British Literature with a focus on turn of the century feminism, but surely those long-deceased, forward thinking writers would understand the allure of Kellan Kyle's clothing?

  Knowing I was up way too early, hours before I had to get ready, I headed downstairs to where my boyfriend most likely was. Not surprisingly, I found him in the kitchen, perfect and causal, dressed in worn jeans and a light shirt. He was leaning against the counter as the coffee brewed. With the coffee scent mixing with the wondrous scent of him, I smiled and walked over to where he was watching me.

  Before I could say anything, he spoke one of my favorite words. "Mornin'. "

  Wrapping my arms around his waist, I snuggled into his chest. "Good morning. " It still being an indecent hour, I yawned after my greeting.

  Chuckling, he rubbed my back. "You don't have to wake up with me. You can sleep in until your school starts. "

  Resting my chin on his chest, I peeked up at him; his dark blue eyes seemed completely rested, intense and alive with a passion waiting to be stoked, just under the surface. "If you're up, I want to be up. " Scrunching my brows, I added, "Why do you get up so early, when you've got nowhere to be?"

  Sighing softly, he looked away from me. "Well, let's just say that my childhood trained me to wake up at the crack of dawn. " Looking back to me, he shrugged. "Waking up on my own was preferable to being woken up. " Shaking his head, he softly added, "I guess the habit stuck, now I can't seem to stop waking up early. "

  I bit my lip, hating what had been done to him at such an early age, hating that it still affected him, even years later, even with the abusers dead and gone. Feeling a remembered melancholy seep into his eyes, I shook my head and forced myself to smile brightly. "Well, I'm glad you do. Quiet mornings with you are some of the best memories that I have. "

  His sad smile widened into a peaceful one as he ran some fingers back through my hair. "Me too," he whispered. "I always looked forward to you coming down to see me. " He shrugged. "Even if it was just for a little while, it still made me feel like we were. . . together. "

  His smile started to fade and I reached up to cup his face. "We were, Kellan. We were together. . . even if it was just for a little while. "

  Memories of all of our stolen moments together swept over me as I touched his face-laughing with him, quiet conversations, holding him, being held by him, being angry with him, being insanely jealous over some harlot he'd been with the night before, even though I'd had no right to be. Falling in love with him. . . Most of it had started right here in his kitchen, waiting for the coffee pot on the counter to finish brewing.

  Lost in the memories, lost in the dark blue depth of his eyes studying mine, I nearly jumped out of my skin when the phone rang. Kellan smiled and chuckled at me as my heart raced about a million miles per hour. I smacked him on the chest as he gently pushed me back and walked over to the obtrusive thing. The shrill sound stopped when he picked up the corded handle.

  "Hello?" Leaning back, Kellan smiled at me as I took some deep, calming breaths. Then his eyes shifted over to stare out the window as he listened to the voice on the other line. "Hey, Denny, long time, no hear. "

  My eyes widened as I listened to my boyfriend greet my ex-boyfriend. It was. . . odd. I knew they still talked, I still talked with Denny too, it just rarely happened when I was in the room. Tilting my head, I considered leaving Kellan to have a private conversation with the man that I knew he still considered family, despite everything.

  Just as my body turned away, Kellan's voice stopped me. "Yeah. . . she's right here. . . hold on. "

  I twisted back to Kellan holding the receiver of the clunky, green phone out to me. Shrugging a little, he whispered, "He called here for you. "

  His face and voice were smooth as he said it, but I thought I saw a slight crease in his brow, and I wondered how he really felt about me still talking to Denny. Knowing he had nothing to worry about there, since Denny and I were completely over, not to mention distanced by thousands of miles since Denny was back home in Australia, I smiled comfortingly and grabbed the phone from him. Kellan remained where he was against the counter, making no attempt to leave me to my privacy. I could understand why.

  The butterflies in my stomach flared up again as I brought the receiver to my ear. It had been a while since I'd talked with Denny last, a couple of months actually. The time apart was making me nervous to talk to him again. Well, that and Kellan standing a foot away from me. Remembering that Denny was still a good friend to both of us, I relaxed as I greeted him. "Good morning, Denny. "

  He laughed, the sound instantly taking me back to the countless lazy afternoons we'd spent together in Ohio. It tightened my heart a little bit. Over or not, I still missed him. "Actually, it's evening here. Did I wake you?"

  His accent was thicker now that he was back at home. It was delicious to the ear and I smiled and laughed at his comment, remembering the massive time change between us. "No, Kellan and I are up. "

  I bit my lip, also remembering that he'd called me here, and had asked if I was awake, which meant he figured I'd spent the night, which meant he probably also assumed I'd slept with Kellan, in the figurative sense. And he'd be right, if he thought that. I hated him thinking about it, much like I still hated to think about him with his current girlfriend, a sweet woman named Abby that he'd been with for a while now, longer than Kellan and I had officially been together.

  He didn't react to me lumping myself together with the man who'd stolen me away from him, though. Kellan, however, smiled devilishly. "Ah, good. Did I miss it?" Denny asked anxiously.

  I furrowed my brow and shook my head. "Miss what?" Kellan repeated my gesture and I shrugged at him.

  Denny quickly filled in the blanks for me. "Your first day back to school. Is it today, or did I miss it?"

  My mouth dropped open as I understood why he was calling. "Did you call just to wish me good luck on my first day of school?" Tears stung my eyes that he would still be so sweet to me. He shouldn't, not after everything I'd done to him. He should curse my name and vow eternal vengeance on me. But that. . . just wasn't Denny.

  I heard him clear his throat and pictured him running a hand through his piecey, dark hair, a goofy smile on his beautiful face. "Well, yeah, I know how nervous you get about stuff like that. " He paused and my throat dried up, amazed and stunned by his level of forgiveness. Kellan narrowed his eyes at my reaction, but didn't say anything. In the silence, Denny asked, "Should I not have called, Kiera? Is this. . . weird?"

  Swallowing repeatedly, I shook my head. "No, no, I'm sorry. Yes, of course you should call me. And no, you didn't miss it, and yes, I'm a little nervous. " Not liking the tension that had built up, I said all of that really fast.

  Kellan crossed his arms over his chest and tilted his head, but Denny laughed. "Oh, okay, good. Well, I just wanted to wish you well, and let you know that I was. . . thinking about you today. "

  He cleared his throat again while I blinked back the tears again. God, he was just too good of a person. Sometimes I thought I was an id
iot for ever hurting him. Okay, all the time I thought I was an idiot for hurting him.

  "Thank you, Denny. . . for remembering. That was incredibly sweet of you. " I felt a flush creep over my face as I peeked up at Kellan. He sniffed and quickly looked away. I felt that age-old guilt wash over me. And just when I thought I'd never have to feel guilty again too.

  Softly, Denny responded with, "No problem, Kiera. I know that Kellan," he swallowed after saying his name, "is probably doing a lot to help you out today, so you probably don't need to hear it from me, but, good luck. "

  Not knowing how else to respond, I only whispered, "Thank you, Denny. " Kellan, still not looking at me, took a step away. I immediately grabbed his arm. He paused, but still wouldn't look back at me.

  Denny laughed a little into the receiver. "Uh, and tell your sister sorry for me. I called there first and I'm pretty sure I woke her up. "

  Smiling, I laughed. Anna did not like being woken up early in the morning. "Yeah, I'll be certain to do that. " Kellan's arm under my fingers turned rigid, but he stayed where he was, staring at the coffee pot like it was the most important thing in the universe. I hated that this was bothering him, but it shouldn't. Denny and I were nothing anymore, and he knew that.

  I soothingly stroked his arm with my thumb as Denny laughed and said, "Well, Abby and I are at a party for work, so I should get going. She'll fillet me if I stay on the phone all night. "

  Laughing lightly, I told him, "Alright. Tell Abby hi for me, and have fun. " After he responded that he would, I turned from Kellan, angling my head away from him. "Hey, thank you so much for remembering, Denny. . . that means a lot to me. " Before he could respond, I added, "I'm so sorry, Denny, about everything. "

  He sniffed and was quiet a moment, then, "Yeah, I know, Kiera. Have a great day at school. I'll talk to you later, goodbye. "

  Closing my eyes for a second, I exhaled, "Bye. "

  Hanging up the phone, I kept my eyes closed as I twisted back to Kellan. When I opened them, he was still staring at the dark coffee resting in the full pot. Although his face was blank, a myriad of emotions were shifting through his eyes. He took another long second, then finally looked back at me.

  Smiling encouragingly, I brushed a strand of hair off his forehead. "Hey, you okay?"

  He nodded, a smile seamlessly brightening his face, if not his eyes. "Of course, I'm fine. Denny called to wish you luck, that was nice of him. " There wasn't a trace of jealousy or sarcasm in his voice, but I heard it anyway.

  Sighing, I laced my arms around his neck. "You know that doesn't mean anything, right? You know that I love you, and Denny is nothing more than a friend now, don't you?" I searched his eyes as his smile faltered. "Don't you?"

  He started to look towards the pot again and I caught his cheek, making him look at me. His smile returned, perfectly natural. "Yes, I know, Kiera. " In a softer voice he added, "I know exactly what you and Denny are. "

  Not entirely sure what he meant by that, I decided to just take it at face value. Leaning up, I gave him a soft kiss. "Good. Because, although he's important to me, you're more important, and I don't want me talking with him to hurt you. "

  His eyes widened as he stared down at me, like he really was surprised to hear me say that. It hurt my heart a little that he still didn't understand-I'd chosen him, I loved him. Kissing him again, I whispered, "I know what you're thinking, and you're wrong. You're not second. I could have fled to him, but I went to you. I couldn't live without you. I chose you. I love you. "

  Swallowing, his eyes searching mine moistened. "It still feels. . . unreal. . . I guess. I'm not used to being. . . loved by someone. I keep waiting to wake up. "

  Biting my lip, I shook my head. "Well get used to it. I'm not going anywhere, Kellan. "

  After a leisurely breakfast, Kellan helped me get ready for school. Well, okay, Kellan laid out on his bed and stared while I got dressed. I'd already had to tell him that he couldn't help me in the shower. Firmly pointing at him to stay put on his pillows, I proceeded to slip my bra on under my towel. Kellan shook his head at me, rolling his eyes. "I've seen you naked, you know?"

  Flushing as I turned around, I muttered, "I know, but you just staring at me like that is. . . different. "

  He snorted and I peeked over my shoulder at him as I slipped on some clean underwear, also under my towel.

  Grinning crookedly, he raised an eyebrow. "It's just skin, Kiera. " Sitting up and scooting to the edge of the bed, where he could just reach me, he grabbed my knee. His hand started to slide up my leg. "And it's far too beautiful to keep covered up. "

  Loving the shivers he was sending up my body, but knowing that I couldn't lounge in a bed with him today, unfortunately, I stepped away and again pointed to his pillows. "I don't need to get you any more riled up than you constantly are, by giving you a peep show. "

  Expertly slipping on my jeans while still having the towel firmly around my chest, I watched him chuckle and relax back down on his mattress. "Fine," he muttered sullenly. "I'll just remember that the next time you're staring at my body. "

  I paused in pulling my blouse out of my bag and met his eye. Knowing that I actually did stare at him quite a bit, I sighed and let the towel drop to the floor. His smile was glorious as he took in my plain, cream-colored bra and I looked away, embarrassed and a little turned on by his attention.

  Quickly counting to five, figuring that was long enough for him to have a decent mental picture for the day, I tossed on my fitted, button-up shirt. Pulling my long hair out of the back, the bulk of it still damp, I rolled my eyes at the heat in his expression while he continued to stare at my covered-up chest. Men.

  Clearing my throat finally brought his eyesight up. Locking gazes with me, he smiled devilishly. "Well now I'm turned on and you can't go. You're just going to have to stay here with me today. "

  Laughing, I leaned over the bed to kiss him. He seemed to think that was a green light and grabbed my body, pulling me on top of him. Giggling in his mouth while we softly moved against the other, I was grateful that his mood had improved from the conversation earlier this morning. I really didn't like him down about Denny, especially since he had no reason to be. I understood though. I'd hurt him so many times while I'd been with Denny. Both of them really. I had no desire to ever hurt a man again.

  As our kiss got more intense, Kellan's body started telling me that he really hadn't been kidding about being in the mood. I reluctantly pulled away from his mouth. "I wish I could stay with you. " Frowning, I sulked. "I'm not really looking forward to today. "

  Sighing, he cupped my cheeks and searched my eyes. "Someday, I'll get you to feel like the confident woman who was prancing around in her underwear last night, all of the time. " Running his hand back through my hair, he added. "You are a beautiful, intelligent woman with a boyfriend who adores you. You have nothing to fear. . . ever. "

  Smiling, I blushed and looked away. "Easy for you to say, rock star. "

  Pulling back, I stood and found my comb. Running it through my locks, I watched him laugh and sit up. "I get nervous. "

  I gave him a very wry smile as I stopped mid-stroke. Yeah, right. Kellan Kyle was never nervous. Not around people. Not about his body or his looks. He oozed confidence in nearly everything he did.

  Tilting his head, he shrugged. "No, it's true. In the beginning, I used to get nervous on stage. "

  Scrunching my brow, I finished unsnarling my hair. "Let me guess, you picture the crowd naked now?"

  Chuckling, he stood up. "Nah, I had to stop doing that. . . turned me on. "

  Pushing his chest back as he came up to me, I laughed unintentionally. "You're impossible. "

  Shaking my head, I rolled my eyes; he only grinned and shrugged. "We all have our weaknesses," he muttered playfully, sneaking around behind me and holding me tight. "You will be great and I'll drive you every day if you want. " Chuckling, he added, "Maybe I'll sit in on a class or two. "


  I laughed at the image of him bored beside me during lectures. "I doubt the professor would like you snoring during class. " Chuckling more, he kissed my neck.

  Sighing, I rested my wet head on his shoulder and closed my eyes, letting his peaceful scent wash over me. I'd decided to forgo wearing his t-shirt to school, but maybe I could get his scent to leech into my clothes. Keep him with me olfactorily. God, what was I saying about not being consumed by him? I couldn't help it. He was. . . consuming.

  Much sooner than I would have liked, the time was up for me to go to class. As promised, Kellan drove me to school. His smile was peaceful as he leaned back in his seat, one hand draped across my thigh, the other casually holding the wheel straight. He seemed like someone returning to a favorite activity after a long absence. It made me smile that driving me around was such a pleasant experience for him. I'd think most people would get tired of it after a couple of weeks. Not Kellan though, he never complained about all of the various places that I needed to go. It was just one of the many ways he showed his affection. For never having been a boyfriend before, I was constantly surprised at how good he was at it. Then again, Kellan was good at most things he tried. . . except pool. . . and, as I'd found out last night, poker.

  Smiling at the image of him in black, silky boxers, pizza in hand as he twirled me around the kitchen, I didn't even notice when we finally stopped. I blinked and looked around when he shut off the car.

  The University of Washington. Located on the other side of Lake Union from the heart of downtown Seattle, it was a massive campus, more like a small city. Several of the local businesses surrounding it survived solely on the influx of college kids coming into and out of this school every year.

  I'd gotten to know this area pretty well after my time here. I wasn't really that nervous about knowing where everything was, although my ethics class was in a building that I'd never had to go into last year, it was more walking into a room full of strangers that tangled my nerves. I was not a big fan of being the focus of people's attention. Which made walking beside Kellan both a blessing and a curse.

  It was a blessing, one, because I loved having him around, but mainly because when he was beside me, people tended to look at him. He just had that aura. The face, the hair, the body, the swagger-everything about him made you take notice. And for girls, the notice was usually a long one.

  It was a curse because, now that we were together, he was a fountain of affection. Our light hand holds last year were arms around each other's waists now. As he laughed along to some comment my parents had made last week about him needing to earn a real living, since being in a band was not a viable career for the man their daughter was dating, a lot of eyes flicked from him to settle on me. Much like at the bar, I got the feeling that I was being judged as I walked along, judged if I was worthy to belong to the rock-god. And because Kellan was right about my general lack of confidence, I couldn't help but think that I came up short in their eyes.

  Lifting my chin, I forced it from my mind. What did it matter if a bunch of random people didn't think I was worthy of Kellan? Kellan did, and really, what other opinion did I need?

  Laughing along with him, I nearly ran right into a small swarm stopped in the hallway.

  Kellan pulled me back right before I collided with a man that seemed about seven feet tall. He hovered over Kellan, who was at least a couple of inches over six feet. The dark-haired boy had a huge smile on his face as he pointed at Kellan.

  "Hey, aren't you that guy? The singer of that band? The D-Bags?"

  Kellan's face relaxed from a cautious expression into a natural smile, and I couldn't help but wonder if he'd thought the guy was going to start a fight with him. There was a time when Kellan didn't care too much about other people's relationships. "Kellan, yeah. . . . I'm a D-Bag. " He laughed a little after his comment, amused by his own band's name.

  I shook my head at him, but the man and his small group of similarly tall friends crowded around, eager to talk to the semi-famous man they'd stumbled upon. Reaching out, the imposing fan grabbed Kellan's hand and shook it. "You were great at Bumbershoot, man!" Then the group started in on the compliments and questions.

  They went on and on until I was afraid I was going to be late if we stayed any longer. Kellan answered all of their questions, and said polite thanks to all of their praises, then expertly released himself from the conversation, waving goodbye as he turned us to walk around the group. By the time he'd successfully disengaged himself, Kellan had been invited to at least three different parties.

  Shaking my head as we approached my classroom, I laughed. Looking over at me, he bumped my shoulder with his. "What?"

  Tilting my head, I gave him a crooked grin. "Look at you, finally getting some male fans. "

  Laughing as he opened the door for me, he shook his head. "We've always had male fans, Kiera. " Raising an eyebrow, he added, "You just choose to fixate on the female ones. "

  Brushing past his body as I walked by him, I paused and leaned into his face. "Well, that's because they fixate on you," I whispered, letting my mouth almost touch his.

  Biting his lip, I heard him groan a little. "Look at you. . . becoming a seductress," he whispered.

  I blushed and immediately stepped away from him.

  I heard his laughter behind me, but didn't turn to look. Soft lips greeted my cheek as his hands rested on my hips. "Have fun," he whispered in my ear.

  I wanted to sigh and lean into him again, but female giggling reminded me that I wasn't alone with him in his bedroom. No, I was in front of a classroom, sort of being inappropriate with my boyfriend. Oh well, at least he'd managed to not make me nervous about my entrance.

  With my cheeks flaming red from the embarrassment of our private moment being watched, I gave him a soft peck and told him that I would. Then I made a beeline to a seat in the middle, away from the chuckling women watching my man's backside as he waved and left the room.

  After a rousing debate on the influence of sexism in early feminist literature, I was feeling right as rain with school again. I knew that would happen. Once I was settled, things were always fine. It was just the process of getting there that frazzled my nerves. After lit was my ethics class. Now that I was comfortable, I was looking forward to this one, although, I had a feeling I'd be doing a lot a soul searching in it. Ethics and I had crossed paths recently, and I'm not sure that I fell on the right side of the morality line. No, no I'm pretty sure I'd failed miserably. Kellan and I both. Maybe I could do a paper about it? It would probably be cathartic.

  Walking into the brick-and-mortar building, just as much a piece of art as a functional structure, my eyes swung across someone I hadn't seen in a while, someone I really wasn't all that interested in seeing again. Hovering by the front doors, I watched a familiar redhead with tight, bouncy curls talking to a couple of her friends. I recognized all three-Candy, and her two chatty spy-friends. They'd each bugged me about Kellan before. Candy the most, since she was the one that found sleeping with him an enjoyable pastime.

  Well, that diversion was shut to her now, and she'd just have to get her kicks somewhere else. A small smile on my face, I watched as they laughingly trailed down the hall a few paces in front of me. I sighed when they all walked into the classroom that I also needed to walk into. I'd had a class with Candy before, last spring actually, when Kellan and I had finally gotten together for good. Guess I had another class with her. And, of course, this would be the class I had every day. And an ethics class to boot. Joy. I bet the universe was laughing its head off at the irony.

  Shaking my head and rolling my eyes, I walked into the room amidst a small flurry of butterflies in my belly. They settled quickly once the people already seated looked up, then looked back down. Well, all but three looked back down. Candy and her friends continued to stare as I made my way to a section nowhere near them. I felt the eyes on my back as I sat down and grabbed a notebook, doodli
ng like a mad woman.

  I waited to feel the presence of Candy moving to sit beside me. When I finally felt a body approaching, I cringed and peeked up. It was only some strait-laced guy, though. He gave me a look that said, Good, she doesn't seem like a talker, maybe I'll be able to hear if I sit next to her, then sat down beside me. I resumed my drawing, glad that at least Kellan's ex-fling wasn't going to disrupt my learning.

  No, she left me completely alone. . . all the way until after class.

  Mentally going over the teacher's explanation on the difference between ethics and morals, I didn't notice her approaching at first. I didn't notice her until she and her friends had me sort of surrounded. Looking between the three walking out of the class beside me, I sighed softly and prayed that Kellan was waiting for me by his car, and not right outside the front doors.

  Sidling up close to my side, Candy tilted her head at me. "So, rumor has it that you and Kellan Kyle are a thing now. Like, a real thing. "

  Peeking over at her, I considered stopping and extending my hand in a formal introduction, since we'd never, ever had one. I didn't though, only shrugged and muttered, "Yep. "

  She scoffed, her clone-like friends around her giggling. "So it doesn't bother you that he's a whore. "

  Stopping in my tracks, I glared over at her and wondered if I could slap a girl in the middle of school and not get in trouble. This was college, right? Wasn't it all about the freedom of expression? "He is not a whore. Don't ever call him that again. " I felt the heat in my tone and was a little proud of myself that my voice wasn't shaking at all.

  She put her hands on her hips, her friends moving to stand behind her, like backup singers or something. "Huh, I guess you're right. " She leaned in, an eyebrow raised. "Whores get paid. He does it for the fun of it. "

  I literally had to grab my jeans to not deck her. Seriously? Deciding getting arrested for assault wasn't a good way to start the school year, I stormed off down the hall. She, of course, followed me.

  "What? Can't handle the truth? I just wanted you to be aware that he still gets it on with every girl he can. " She laughed, dryly. "It's not like being with you has miraculously turned him into a good boy now. Men are what they are, and Kellan is a sex addict. "

  Tears of anger stinging my eyes, I twisted to face her. "You don't know anything about him. You don't know anything he's been through. " Leaning into her, I raised my own eyebrow. "I know you've slept with him, but don't confuse sex for intimacy. " Irritated that I'd let her get to me, knowing full well that she was just trying to rile me up, I jerked open the front doors. Luckily, Kellan was not there.

  Right on my heels, she snapped back, "Hey, I'm doing you a favor. You think he's changed, you think he's suddenly a faithful, one-woman man now? A tiger doesn't change his spots!"

  Groaning as I dashed down the steps, I tossed over my shoulder, "A tiger doesn't even have spots. Get your metaphors straight. "

  Prissily she marched beside me. "Whatever, my point is, Tina here," she jerked her thumb at the blonde striding next to her, "saw him after a show on the Square just last week. " Smirking, she yanked on my elbow to hold me in place. "He was shirtless and about get it on with some skank. "

  Tina nodded her agreement, adding, "And in a storage closet too. . . how romantic. "

  Glaring between the two of them, I felt ice pour through my body. He had several shows during the week that weren't at Pete's bar. He got home really late after those shows, because he had to help clean up their stuff. He could have. . . I shook my head. No, not after everything. . . he wouldn't do that to me. A nagging voice in my head added, "Right, just like you wouldn't do that to Denny?"

  Ignoring that voice, I narrowed my eyes at the gossipers. "You didn't see what you think you saw. I trust him. " With that, I jerked my arm away and sauntered off.

  Light laughter followed me, along with, "You know, him having your name across his heart doesn't mean he's not loaning out other parts of his body!"

  My mouth dropped open as I looked back at her. Not many people knew about Kellan's tattoo. He was much more reluctant to strip off his shirt at shows now, like he didn't want the world to see his hidden art. It meant a lot to me that he felt that way. It was private, between the two of us. How did this group of girls know about it? Had Tina really seen him half naked? I didn't want to believe it, but my mind vividly pictured him undressed, panting with desire, with some harlot fan attached to his mouth. Then I pictured him closing the storage room door and doing all sorts of unseemly things to her.

  I felt my stomach rising as I gaped at them. They only chuckled at me, Tina giving me a fake, apologetic smile while Candy shrugged. "Dogs are dogs, Kiera," she said, smiling sweetly.

  I bit my lip and forced myself to walk away from them, and not run. They were lying. . . they had to be.

  When I got out to the parking lot, I spotted Kellan's shiny black Chevelle right away. I also spotted him and instantly understood why he hadn't greeted me outside of class on my first day of school. He was surrounded by a group of about five girls. He was casually leaning against his car as he talked to them. They giggled, tittering like thirteen-year-olds as he spoke. Even from the distance between us, I could see the small, amused smile on his face. After my meeting with Candy, it boiled my blood.

  My hands in permanent fists, I strutted over to him. I tried to calm myself down, but instead I seemed to get angrier with each step. Where had they seen that damn tattoo? Where was he exposing himself? Was I being naive in thinking that what we have is so monumental that he'd never stray from it? Was he still being a whore?

  Laughing at something one of the hussies said, Kellan turned his head and spotted me. His small smile brightened at seeing me approach, then dimmed when he noticed the scowl on my face. The tittering girls didn't back off at all, and I had to elbow my way through them to get to him.

  "Let's go," I bit out, not really in the mood to be around his fans for another second longer.

  He nodded, his brow furrowed as he opened the passenger's door. After shutting it behind me, I heard him say to his adoring entourage, "I'm sorry, but I have to go. It was nice meeting you all. " There were whines and groans of disappointment as he walked over to his side of the car. I rolled my eyes.

  Kellan watched me curiously as he started the car, the roar of the engine matching my foul mood. Cocking an eyebrow, he put the car in reverse. One eye on me, the other carefully tracked the girls, so he didn't run them over as they watched us pull away. "You want to tell me what happened that's got you all ticked off?"

  Gritting my jaw, I glared at the floosies staring after him. Most turned away from my eye line, a couple glared back. "Not really," I muttered under my breath.

  Sighing, he put his hand on my thigh. I instantly wondered where else that hand had been recently. "Will you anyway?" I looked back at him, trying to keep my expression and my mood even. He frowned before turning onto the road. "You're the one that said we should talk things out. . . and you look like you need to talk something out. "

  Grunting, and wishing I'd never said that to him, I crossed my arms over my chest. "I have another class with Candy this year. She made sure to say hello afterwards. "

  I watched him carefully as he studied the road he was driving along. He narrowed his eyes and tilted his head; it was an adorable expression of confusion. "Candy. . . ?"

  I rolled my eyes that her name didn't immediately register with him. Well, when your little black book was as about as thick as the local yellow pages, I suppose it took a while to mentally filter through it.

  A second later, as I was sighing, recognition flared in his eyes and he peeked over at me. "Oh, right. . . Candy. " Twisting his lips, he shrugged. "What. . . did she say?"

  Full on glaring at him, I tightened my hands across my chest. If I didn't, I was sure I'd smack him. "She just mentioned a show that you had last week. You played in Pioneer Square, right?"

  He looked up,
accessing his memory, or was he accessing the creative part of the brain that made up rapid-fire lies. Looking up and to the left meant one, looking up and to the right meant the other. I could just never remember which one was which. "Yeah, yeah we did. " He tilted his head to me. "Was she there? She didn't say hello. " He added that last part quickly, as if he was reassuring me that he hadn't seen her.

  I narrowed my eyes even more as I studied him. Had I just had sex last night with a man that was having sex with a bunch of other people too? God, it made me sick just to think about it. "No, a friend of hers saw you there. . . in the back. "

  I said that suspiciously and he looked at me funny before shifting his attention back to driving. Shrugging, he said, "Huh, well, okay. " Peeking over at me, he raised an eyebrow. "Why is one of her friends seeing me making you look like you sucked on a lemon?"

  Exhaling in a tightly controlled way, I resisted the urge to smack the crap out of him. "Because she says she saw you doing things. . . with someone who was not me. "

  His eyes widened as he stared at me, then he jerked the car over to the side of the road. I had to hold onto the door he moved over so fast. With the car slightly on the curb, he slammed it into park, and shifted to face me.

  His expression deadly serious, he held my eye; I could feel mine stinging as my fears bubbled up to the surface. "I am not doing anything with anyone who is not you. Whatever she said was a lie, Kiera. "

  I lifted my chin, but I could feel the tear building, swelling until it rolled down my cheek. "She knew about the tattoo, Kellan. "

  He cupped my cheek, brushing the moisture off my skin. "Then she saw it somewhere else or someone told her about it, because I'm not fooling around with anyone. " Unbuckling his seatbelt and scooting closer to me, he rested his head against mine. "I'm only fooling around with you. I'm only getting naked with you. I'm only having sex with you, Kiera. " Pulling back, he met my eye. "I chose you. I love you. I'm not interested in anyone else, okay?"

  I nodded, feeling more tears slide down my cheeks. I felt the truth in his words, words that were similar to the words of comfort and reassurance that I often gave to him. I hated that one conniving, jealous bitch had made me doubt him. If she hadn't had such a good point I wouldn't have, but Kellan had a long, sordid history of poor decisions when it came to women. I didn't always feel special enough to stop that cycle of behavior.

  He leaned in to tenderly kiss me and I felt myself relaxing as he poured his heart into his soft touch. Tasting the salt of my tears between us, I tried to let the doubt go. We'd gone through so much. I'd seen a side of him, a vulnerability, that I was positive no other girl had seen before. I was certain that I had his heart, and surely he wouldn't risk losing his heart over some stupid ache his body might be feeling. Not when he could satisfy that ache with me. Not when I would take him into my bed every night, and the brand new bed that he'd just purchased for me the other day, too.

  As our kiss picked up heat, our bodies inching closer as our breaths increased, I wanted to remind him what I could be to him, and I wanted him to remind me exactly what we had together-a bond that no eager fan could break. Knowing that I had a couple of hours before work, and an empty apartment, I dragged my lips up to his ear. "Show me that you want me, Kellan. Take me home. "

  He had the car back in drive and flying down the road a microsecond later.