Bowser, Page 2

the can. My problem, I was head first in the can unable to right myself. The more I fought to raise my head the deeper into the pile of garbage I sank. I had to stop and take a breath at the bottom. I was curled up head to rear and after a life or death move raised my head looking up at the stars. I thanked the dog gods and sniffed around for some burgers. No burgers were found only paper that smelled like burgers. I was hungry so I licked the mustard and ketchup off a few papers and climbed out vowing that would be my last time I went garbage can diving.

  We, I and Red never slept together. He was always a little secretive about where he spent the night. I would meet up with him around noon on the boardwalk. One day he never showed and I asked around about him and one particular scraggy dog told me he left town. If the truth was known he probably was caught doing some guys girlfriend and paid the price.

  After the nice chicken sandwich and ice cream it was time for a new flea collar. Along the way he had to hide under a truck as the dog catcher drove slowly by hunched over the steering wheel looking for an unsuspected homeless critter. He watched until the truck turned the corner, but he continued to lay there. ‘I’m no fool,’ he thought as a few minutes later the truck came back down the street hoping to catch a fool dog or two.

  He sidled up to the door of the pet shop. The door was open on hot day and the sounds of puppy dogs waiting for an easy mark to stop at the window and say, ‘Oh how cute they are.’ Bowser sat there waiting for someone to come into the store. Finally, his tongue dripping from the heat of the day, a mother and daughter came by and stopped at the window. He put on his act scratching his side like a frustrated motorcycle rider trying to start his bike with no gas in it.

  The little girl noticed him and said to her mother, ‘Mommy that dog has fleas. He needs a new flea collar. Let’s buy him one.’

  Mother looked at him and turned her nose up and said, ‘I’d buy him one honey, but who would take the old one off and put the new one on such a dirty old thing like that.’ The little girl nodded her head and they moved off. He stopped pumping his leg and thought to himself, how to get the old one off and the new one on. He decided it was too much trouble and headed back down the street.

  He stopped at the crosswalk and waited for the light to change before crossing. The light changed and he headed across the street. Half way across a car came roaring down the street and ran the red light hitting Bowser in the back end sending him flying up onto the sidewalk. The car stopped and four girls piled out and ran back to see how he was. He was hurt bad. The girls picked him up and put him in their car and drove him to the vet. The vet turned his nose up at the smell of him, but set his broken leg.

  The driver was crying and said, ‘It’s all my fault and I will take him home and take care of him.’ Bowser’s ears perked up and through the pain, smiled at her through yellow teeth.

  Comfortable in the back seat he rode to his new home. The car was a convertible and the wind was fresh blowing through his matted coat. ‘I might even get a bath out of this deal,’ he thought. The pain was tolerable knowing he would get some good food and sleep without one eye open. Arriving at her house in the mountains, they carried him to the deck with a breath taking view of the city and ocean. They made a soft bed for him and when they placed him in the bed, he moaned a little to touch their hearts. He knew how to play this game.

  By the next day he was feeling much better. This morning, much to his surprise, when the sliding door of the deck opened, out walked his girlfriend from the park. She was regal as she pranced around the deck not looking at him being coy. His tail thumped the bed and he put on his best smile. She made two laps around the deck and went back inside as the girl came out to check on him. The mother of the girl followed her out. Mother turned her nose up in the air and said, ‘Gloria you must take this dog to the vet and have him bathed.’

  I looked up them both and wondered what a bath would feel like as having never had one of those before. Before he knew it, he was carried off to the car and off to the vet he went.

  The vet did a cursory look at his leg and took the cast off. He tied the leg so when the dog washer started up he would not injure his leg. They wheeled him into a stainless steel room where a table with two large stainless steel dish washer type boxes stood on the table. One was marked ‘Wash’ and the other ‘Rinse.’ They placed him in a large plastic tray and put a mask over his face for breathing. Ready to go they slide him in the washer and closed the door. Immediately a sprinkler system came on and I started to panic. No place to go, so I tried to relax while the sprinkler went off and then like a car wash brushes came down and started to soap and wash my matted coat. I could breathe fine and soon came to enjoy the soft washing of the circular brushes. Then the brushes stopped and the sprinkler system started again. Three times and I were clean as whistle.

  After that they transferred me to the other box on the table and without a mask I was blow dried and a sweet smell of perfume was applied. My formally matted hair now stood up and blew in the wind. A few minutes later the door opened and out I came smelling good and clean.

  Then a white clad serious looking person came in with a tray in her hand. I was placed on another table and then my mouth was forced open and an instrument of some sort placed on my bottom to top mouth so I couldn’t close my mouth! The next thing I heard was a buzzing sound. Twenty minutes later the instrument removed and water from a hose sprayed into my mouth, I coughed and gagged and shook my head. I licked my lips and felt my teeth now kind of sticky to my tongue. Away I went to the see the vet again and a new cast on my leg. Not long after that, with a new flea collar around my neck and a chain and tag with my name on it, I felt proud as any dog could feel, as I rode back to my new home with the wind blowing through my clean coat.

  Back in my spot in the shade on the deck, my girlfriend came out and sniffed me out; but this time her beautiful eyes locked onto my twitching eye and she opened her mouth to say something as I waited anxiously for her to speak. Straining my ears to the max to look good, she turned her back to me showing me her cute back side. She turned her head to me and with a smirk on her face trotted back into the house playing hard to get.

  The nice girl came out and gave me some dry dog food to munch on. With my newly cleaned teeth I made short work of the goodies and lay back to take a nap from a very busy morning. I had a very bad dream as I was locked in the dog washer and the brushes were tossing me every which way. Water and soap flying and I couldn’t breathe. Then instead of transferring to the blow dryer, the blow dryer came on three times the force of before. Like a hurricane I was blown dry and when it stopped, I was stuck to the side of the box. I woke up in a sweat as I heard the sliding door slide open and my girlfriend came back out. This time she walked over to me and sniffed my nose. I could smell her scent and my heart started to pound. She sniffed all over and licked the dry food crumbs from my bed licking her lips and turning me on! Mother came out the door scolding her to no end. Grabbed her collar and drug her into the house. I was deflated and sad to see her go.

  Next day I could hop on three legs so I could make it off the deck where the girl showed me where to make a deposit. Proud of my big job I made it back to the deck for a little rest and for the first time really looked at the panorama from the deck high in the hills, overlooking the city to the west, on out to the ocean. I liked it up here, but missed the big city action. I told myself there was no hurry and to relax and enjoy the view and attention I was getting. I wished I had a mirror to check myself out in, but alas, that would have to wait till another day.

  A week went by and then another week. The end of the week saw me back on the vet’s table being examined and a new smaller splint type affair placed on my broken leg. The vet told us that in three weeks the cast could come off and I would be able to walk on all fours again. Good news for me as my girlfriend kept teasing me at every opportunity away from mother. I was determined to seal the deal when the chance came my way. Ever the guy to take advantage of an opportunity, I b
ided my time to make my move.

  A few days before I was to get my leg free, we had a visitor. A big male Standard pranced his way out the sliding door followed by my girlfriend. At first he ignored me and then passed by with a glare in his eyes. I glared back with a twitch in my eye and thumbed my nose at him. He made sure I saw his intention of mating with my girlfriend as he rubbed his nose on her face and sniffed her back side. I was jealous as all get out. My girlfriend saw my anxiety and played it for all its worth. I got a little mad and turned my head in disgust. The two mothers were talking about the two Standards having pups and soon my face turned beat red at the news of my girlfriend mating with that uppity French Poodle. Now I was more than ever bent on spoiling the plan.

  Splint off and back on all fours I raced around like a new model. I made a few twists and turns as I was yelled at to take it easy. My girlfriend accompanied us for her annual check up for a pap’s smear and I was showing off a little bit.

  Back home I prowled the estate putting to memory every square inch of the place. I checked for an escape route if necessary and going and coming in the car I watched for