Dirk Rapier's A Hole in One, Page 2

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  A Note to my Dear Readers:

  When Dirk Rapier’s A Hole in One was first serialized in Cottage Lass Today, International Edition, I was touched by the warm reception the first chapter received, and I fielded dozens of enthusiastic letters from women of many ages and heritages. To be honest with you, Dear Reader, although it might not be discernable to many of you, I am not terribly knowledgeable about the Emerald Isle. In fact, truth be known, I have never actually visited the homeland of Shaw and Wilde! Rather, using the cunning tools peculiar to writers, I simply recalled old films and picture books from my youth and painted Georgette’s world with the ensuing memories that came to me. I trust Ireland has not changed much since those magical days. My deepest apologies for any slight errors I may have made in depicting these simple people and their charming, antiquated and peaceful land.

  In the light of the overwhelming success of Chapter 1: Birdie in the Hand, the editors of CLT International Edition suggested that I solicit letters from my fans in order to incorporate ideas for further plot development for Dirk Rapier’s A Hole in One. I at first objected, feeling that writing is a solitary pursuit and that the artist should not be forced against his or her nature into a collaboration that might in any way influence the direction of the narrative. However, the editors assured me that such ploys are commonplace in these days of computers and internetted mailings, not to mention the confusing but apparently desirable phenomenon they referred to as “hits”. It was also strongly suggested that the magazine might rethink publication of the subsequent chapters if I refused. And so I agreed it might be an interesting exercise.

  I will not pretend it was an enjoyable experience. Some fans, it seemed, had developed not only certain feelings for my characters - but even for myself! I will not go into details, Dear Reader, as I fear you might take offense at some of the rather off-color suggestions made as to what should happen with Georgette, Perry, and the oafish Tad.

  In the end, a letter was chosen by the editors more with an eye to my safety - which I appreciated - rather than for the quality of the suggestions within. Here then, is the junior editor’s note in the following issue of CLT International Edition, and the letter of the “winning” entrant.

  Yours Sincerely,

  D. Rapier

  Well, the last of the hundreds of letters has been read and the judging has been completed. Thanks to all who submitted ideas for chapter 2 of “Dirk Rapier’s A Hole in One” to Cottage Lass Today, International Edition. There were so many wonderful entries that it was very hard to choose.

  But we have a winner! Miss Iphigenia Swoon of Wichita won the all expenses paid trip to Dublin and the full set of Irish Rover luggage. Congratulations, Ms. Swoon!

  We have reprinted her letter below in its entirety:

  Dear Mr. Rapier,

  I really like your new story, Dirk Rapier’s A Hole in One! Where you come up with these titles and stories I can’t imagine! It must be your creative mind! Anyways, I think Georgette is spunky and brave – and of course she’s beautiful, too! She’s just super, and I think she deserves to marry Perry Chinthrust at the end. I don’t know if that’s what you have in mind – and far be it for me to interfere in the creative process! – but I just think it’d be real nice if she did.

  I hate to say so, but you wrote one story I really didn’t care for a few years back. It was called, Love Struck about that pretty girl boxer? I was so disappointed when she didn’t marry her handsome coach, Granite Limbcrush. Really, really, really, really disappointed. I can’t even tell you how disappointed I was.

  And then, I was so happy to see you were back to your usual greatness in the next book, Pitch Perfect. It was so romantic how you had everyone get married - even the umpires! By the way, I was real sorry to hear about your dog, Bangles. It’s great you got him back – after your stories got good again. It’s so funny that he was left by your back door. No note, just a pink bow with certain initials on it... Believe me, I know.

  Anyways, like I said, I just love this new story so far. And I wouldn’t change a thing – not a blessed thing. But I guess I’d like to know what exact shade of blue Georgette’s eyes are. I am wondering if they’re my favorite color. Can you guess what that is?

  So get back to work, Mr. Rapier! I can’t wait to see the next installment. I am such a huge fan!

  Sincerely,

  Iphigenia Swoon

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