Stink and the Incredible Super-Galactic Jawbreaker, Page 3

  Stink got to school early and slipped the letter inside Webster’s desk. He watched Webster read it. Webster looked up. He looked over at Stink. “You mean you didn’t miss my birthday on purpose?”

  “No way,” said Stink. “Just like I didn’t sucker-punch you on purpose. You gotta believe me.”

  Webster grinned from ear to ear.

  “Friends?” asked Stink.

  “Friends,” said Webster. “So what’s the big surprise, huh? What’s C.G.? C’mon! Tell me! I can’t wait!”

  “My lips are sealed,” said Stink, zippering his lips.

  “Does it stand for Card Game?” asked Webster.

  “Cinderella’s Glass slipper?” asked Sophie of the Elves.

  “Cucumbers and Grapes?” asked Webster. “Crazy Glue?”

  “No, no, and nope,” said Stink. “You just have to wait. My dad’s bringing it. But Mrs. D. said not until the end of the day.”

  Waiting was harder than writing letters. Harder than punctuation. Harder than spelling sincerely.

  At the end of the day, Mrs. D. read eleven pages from Sophie of the Elves’ favorite chapter book about a brave mouse and an evil rat.

  Finally! At last! An announcement over the PA system.

  “Special Delivery for Class 2D! Stink Moody to the front office!”

  “Wow! Cool! Hey! What? Huh?” everybody buzzed.

  Stink walked-not-ran down to the office and came back to class with Dad, a rainbow-bright rooster piñata, and 21,280 jawbreakers. Not to mention all sorts of candy bars, microbots, and monkey pencils.

  “Candy-Gram!” Stink announced. “I repeat. Candy-Gram for Webster Gomez.”

  Webster was already at the door. He had never ever seen so much candy in his whole entire life. “For me? WOWEE!”

  “To celebrate your birthday,” said Stink. “With the whole class!”

  “Piñata party!” everybody was saying.

  “A Candy-Gram!” said Sophie of the Elves. “C.G. is for Candy-Gram!”

  “I never got a Candy-Gram before. It’s like a telegram, only better.”

  “Where’d you get all the candy and stuff?” asked Sophie.

  “I got it FREE. Sort of by mistake on purpose.”

  Dad and Mrs. D. filled the piñata with candy and goodies. Dad got to stand on the teacher’s desk! He hung the piñata from the ceiling.

  “Who wants to go first?” asked Dad, pointing to the bright red rooster.

  “Webster!” called Stink.

  Dad asked Webster to close his eyes and handed him the stick. “Stand back, everybody,” Dad called.

  “On the count of three!” said Mrs. D.

  Webster swung the stick. It sliced the air, this way and that. Whoosh! Swoosh!

  “Go, Webster, go!” everybody yelled. “Over this way. You’re getting warm!”

  Bam! Webster finally hit the piñata! Nothing. Class 2D was super-quiet.

  “Let’s try again — in French,” said Mrs. D. “Un, deux, trois . . .” Bam! Webster hit the piñata again! Still nothing.

  “That rooster doesn’t want to crow,” said Dad.

  “I’ll help!” called Stink. “Let’s swing the stick together.”

  “Three’s a charm,” said Mrs. D. “Give it your best try. In Spanish, everybody! Uno, dos, tres . . .”

  Ka-POW! Webster and Stink hit the piñata again. Bam! Bam! Bam! Crack! They cracked open the piñata.

  Cock-a-doodle-doo! The rooster let out a loud sound, for real! Everybody screamed. A flood of candy rained down. Jawbreakers and Tweezlers, Milk Dudes and Peanut Butter Yucks. The kids raced to the front. They grabbed candy from all over the floor, under desks, behind the bookcase, even in the trash can.

  “It’s raining cats and dogs!” said Stink. “Kool Katz and Scottie dogs!”

  “We really hit the jackpot!” said Webster.

  “That was more fun than a barrel of monkeys!” said Sophie of the Elves.

  “Marvelous! I can see we’ve really learned our idioms,” said Mrs. D. “Now let’s divide up all the treats fair and square. Share and share alike!”

  Stink stared at his own sweet pile of treats and treasures on his desk. It was a lot smaller than 21,280 jawbreakers. But when he saw Webster’s face, and a whole classfull of grins, he felt good inside. UN-rotten to the core, like the sweet, gooey bubblegum center of a jawbreaker.

  “I’m proud of you, Stink,” said Dad. “I think you proved a leopard can change its spots.”

  “I like the way you and your dad worked together,” said Mrs. D., smiling. “Two heads are better than one.”

  “And friends are better than all the free stuff in the world,” said Stink.

  “Is that another idiom?” asked Webster.

  “No, it’s a Stink-iom!” said Stink.

  • kid in a candy store

  • get up on the wrong side of the bed

  • rotten to the core

  • sour grapes

  • strike a deal

  • finger-lickin’ good

  • down in the dumps

  • A leopard can’t change its spots.

  • Two heads are better than one.

  • You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.

  • Practice makes perfect.

  • When it rains, it pours.

  • Put your thinking cap on.

  • Knock on wood.

  • jaw dropped open

  • free as a bird

  • green with envy

  • Don’t let the bedbugs bite.

  • out of the blue

  • just my luck

  • cute as a bug’s ear

  • mad as a hornet

  • cost an arm and a leg

  • double trouble

  • make a mountain out of a molehill

  • lost his head

  • cross my heart

  • feel like a heel

  • grin from ear to ear

  • My lips are sealed.

  • You’re getting warm.

  • Three’s a charm.

  • It’s raining cats and dogs.

  • hit the jackpot

  • more fun than a barrel of monkeys

  • fair and square

  • Share and share alike.

  “McDonald has perfectly pegged elementary school, second-graders, and the dynamics of family life. . . . These tales of the Moody family will hit the spot for beginning chapter book readers.” — Chicago Sun-Times

  “Like big sister Judy Moody, Stink sports a mem-orable name and a talent for self-expression. . . . With large print, an attractive format, and an eye-catching cover, the second book in the Stink series will attract readers who are just getting comfortable with chapter books.” — Booklist

  “Reynolds’s familiar illustrations keep the mood light.” — Kirkus Reviews

  “P.U.!” said Judy, coming into Stink’s room. “Did you take a bath in that stinky perfume or something?”

  “Or something,” said Stink.

  “Then I hate to tell you, but you have a UFO in your room.”

  “Do not,” said Stink.

  “Not the alien kind of UFO,” said Judy. “An Unidentified Flying Odor. I can smell it from my room.”

  Stink kicked his sneakers under the bed.

  “Stink, it’s those sneakers. You’re stinking up the whole house with those yucks. You have to get them out of here.”

  Stink tossed his sneakers into the hallway.

  “That’s even closer,” said Judy. “I can already smell them up on my top bunk! Even Mouse is about to pass out from the fumes.”

  Stink went back to his desk and scribbled on a piece of paper. He came out into the hallway and tacked up a sign over his sneakers:

  Beware! Hall of Fumes!

  “Ha, ha, very funny. Like that really helped,” said Judy, pinching her nose closed and talking in a funny voice.

  “Then just shut your door,” said Stink. “Like this!” He slammed the door on purpose.<
br />
  Stink heard Judy stomp into the bathroom. Stink heard Judy slam the medicine cabinet door. Stink heard Judy rattle around in the hall.

  Stink could not concentrate on drawing comics. He could not read the T-for-Toads encyclopedia. He could not hear himself think with all that stomping and slamming and rattling.

  Stink opened his door.

  A cloud of white dust attacked him. He coughed and waved his hand in front of his face. Stink could hardly see his sister. Judy had powder in her hair and on her face and all the way down to her shoes. She looked like a human marshmallow. She looked like the Abominable Snow Girl. She looked like a cumulonimbus cloud.

  “What’s with all the powder?” Stink asked, still coughing. Then the cloud cleared. The dust settled. And Stink saw it.

  “OH, NO!” screamed Stink. “My sneakers! My beautiful super-smelly sneakers!”

  “It’s okay,” said Judy. “The powder will help. It’ll soak up the smell and they won’t stink so bad.”

  “NO! You don’t get it!” said Stink. “I was stinking them up on purpose, so I could enter them in the All-Time, World’s Worst, Super-Stinky Sneaker Contest. How could you not know that? How could you forget?”

  “Oops!” said Judy.

  Stink did not know what to do. Now his perfectly smelly sneakers were not perfect at all. They were perfect for winning an air-freshener contest. They were perfect for winning a not-stinky perfume contest. No way were they going to beat Sophie now.

  An excerpt from Stink and the World’s Worst Super-Stinky Sneakers

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