Finding You, Page 24

  But that life feels strangely distant now, and all of the safety and predictability in the world couldn’t lure me back. Here, now, with Tam’s arm around me and a new purpose pumping my heart behind my ribs, I have what matters.

  Tam stops walking again, and the cart drifts on ahead of us. “I love you, you know,” he says, laying his hand against the side of my face and stroking my sore cheek ever so gently with his thumb. I can feel my pulse in the slash marks, racing faster all the time. Then he leans in and kisses me, his lips soft and eager, and my fingers tangle in his hair as my eyes drop slowly closed and my heart soars high.

  acknowledgments

  I lay all the blame for my love of stories on my mother, who read The Chronicles of Narnia and The Arabian Nights and innumerable others aloud to my siblings and me growing up, making magic a part of everyday life. Between the countless hours spent in the library putting holds on Gail Carson Levine novels and Andrew Lang collections, and my own whimsical imagination, I believe I was always destined to pursue storytelling in some form. I certainly didn’t think I’d see my name in print on a novel before I was twenty-five, though. For that great, impossible-seeming gift, I thank the marvelous people at Swoon Reads.

  Firstly, Holly West, my editor. I don’t know how you know what needs to go and what needs to stay, or which characters aren’t necessary, or how to hone my voice. I think it’s an actual gift. Thank you for the ingenious insights and the phone calls to talk me off of panicked editing ledges. For making Finding You what it is, for seeing the heart of my story and working your magic so others can see it, too, I am forever in your debt.

  Lauren Scobell, I think I’ve had a crush on you since we met. Thank you for rooting for Finding You and helming the ship that has brought it to where we are today. You are brilliant and insightful and you love The Night Circus.

  To Jean Feiwel for believing in my book when it was almost double this size and had so, so many troubles. I’m indebted to you for taking it on anyway.

  To Emily Settle for your patience and helpfulness and responses that are much more prompt than my own. To my copyeditors, who made Finding You make sense, and to Rich Deas for the beautiful cover art that made it all feel real. To the Swoon Reads staff for making my publishing dreams come true.

  Also to my readers, who have pushed this book to where it is today—its baby years, chapter-by-chapter on figment.com, and then in the Swoon Reads community, where your kind and constructive words were responsible for this physical book becoming a reality.

  To my stalwart comrades, Savannah, Reagan, Kristin, Janelle, Patrick, Cara, Hannah, and the rest of our Figgies Underground. Thank you for the love and word sprints and virtual pear cheese. To Kim Karalius, the whole reason I’m here today, for texting and calling when I’m lost, for loving my characters more than I do sometimes, and for sharing Swoon Reads with me in the first place. To Samantha, to whom I’ve almost dedicated this entire book a millions times over. Finding You would very literally not exist without you. I am deeply grateful for you, mighty woman of valor; I cannot tell you in words. Isla owes much to you as well.

  And to the people who kept me sane during the last crazy years of trying to figure out who I am and what stories I was supposed to tell—Meghan, for believing in me way too much, calling me when I’m panicking, and loving me when I’m a mess; Brittney, also for your belief, for keeping all of my secrets, for being the big sister that I never had; Rachel, for writing with me via nerdy blogs and long emails; Sarah, for the moral support that reaches all the way to tattoo parlors; Aidan, for earnest encouragements and Keira Knightley imitations; Abigail, for sending writing memes and taking way too many headshots; and the rest of my unofficial support team who I couldn’t do without: Raleigh, Alli, Michelle, Tiandra, Kristi, Autumn, Sharon Duffy, who believed in my writing and really took it seriously years before I did, and the Warner family, for reading my books before they were ready for the rest of the world. To my family at Aletheia Church (especially Donny & Janna, Adam & Hope, Kevin & Kelsey, and Becca), for enveloping me.

  To my grandma and grandpa, who have encouraged me and my dreams at every turn and in every possible way, and all the family who have been telling strangers that I was a writer long before it was close to being legitimate (looking at you, Auntie Sharon).

  And of course to my family—Mum, who taught me to love stories and wouldn’t let me graduate until I stopped procrastinating and finished a novel (unconventional homeschooling win) and has read every one since; Daddy, who never doubted that I could do anything I put my mind to and has always encouraged me and teased me and pushed me; Jake, who made me start writing in the first place so I could be like him and has been my biggest supporter ever since (sorry I stole the name Valentina); Emmy, my best friend in the world, who loves me unconditionally and reminds me I have value and stories to tell; Ben, who reads my books aloud on road trips in outrageous accents and doesn’t let me take myself too seriously but is always proud of me; and Katie, my beta reader, my first and foremost fangirl, who makes me feel like a real author every time she yells at me for something that happens to my characters.

  To close, I have to thank Beatrix Potter, for making me want to tell stories; as a first-grader struggling to learn to read, I thought Tom Kitten was going to be eaten and felt my stomach tighten into knots and thought, “How can she make me feel something real with just words?”

  And more than anyone, my creator and savior, Jesus Christ, who puts stories in all of us—behind us, so we can share, around us, so we can empathize, and in front of us, so we can hope. I’m so glad he decided that I get to tell a few of my own.

  about the author

  Lydia Albano is a (self-proclaimed) Bunburyist living in Cambridge, Massachusetts, where she promotes Oxford commas, spends her money on musical theater, and demands the Myers-Briggs letters of everyone she meets. Finding You is her debut novel. Visit her online at lydiaalbano.com/blog, or sign up for email updates here.

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  Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Notice

  Dedication

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  Copyright

  Copyright © 2017 by Lydia Albano

  A Swoon Reads Book

  An imprint of Feiwel and Friends and Macmillan Publishing Group, LLC.

  175 Fifth Avenue, New York, NY 10010

  swoonreads.com

  All rights reserved.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.

  Our eBooks may be purchased in bulk for promotional, educational, or business use. Please contact the Macmillan Corporate and Premium Sales Department at (800) 221-7945 ext. 5442 or by e-mail at [email protected].

  First hardcover edition 2017

  eBook edition September 2017

  eISBN 9781250098597

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  Lydia Albano, Finding You