Lost Love (Lazy Love Book 4)

  Lost Love

  by Kirsten Osbourne

  Trifecta Books

  Book design and layout copyright © 2016 by Trifecta Books

  Cover design copyright © 2016 by Jenni James

  This is a work of fiction, and the views expressed herein are the sole responsibility of the author. Likewise, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are represented fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, or actual events or locales, is entirely coincidental.

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form by any means whatsoever without written permission from the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

  Copyright© 2016 by Kirsten Osbourne

  Table of Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Epilogue

  Author Bio

  Lost Love

  by Kirsten Osbourne

  Chapter One

  Sally Jackson glanced up at the knock on the door of her classroom. Most people didn’t bother to knock, so she was a bit startled at the intrusion. “Come in!”

  When the door opened, she inhaled sharply, surprised by the person standing in front of her. “Jay? Jay Graber?” He looked as good as ever, and she felt butterflies in her stomach at the sight of him.

  “Sally.” He looked at her, pain filling his eyes. He’d been sure the Miss Jackson his niece Alison had told him about was his own Sally, but until he’d stepped into her classroom, it hadn’t really hit him how hard it would be to see her again. “I need to talk to you about my niece.”

  Sally frowned, shrugging. “Your niece?” He wasn’t there to see her? Why would he be? You rejected him, remember?

  “Alison Jolly.”

  Alison was a student of hers, but she’d had no idea of the relation to Jay, the only man she’d ever loved. Alison was in her sophomore honors English class, so she was around fifteen or sixteen. “I didn’t realize she was your niece.”

  He nodded. “Yeah, she is. She says you’re giving her too much homework, and she can’t keep up.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “She’s in honors English. Of course there’s a lot of homework. There needs to be.” She sighed, hating that she was seeing him again this way. “I heard you’d left town.”

  Jay sat down on the chair she kept next to her desk. “I did. After . . . what happened between us, I thought it was best.”

  “Where did you go? The rumors never said.” And she’d listened as much as she could. Of course, she’d had her hands full with raising her niece, who had been just ten at the time.

  “Does it matter?”

  “It does to me.” Sally hadn’t realized he thought their relationship was over. She’d told him that it wasn’t a good time for them to marry because she had gotten custody of her niece, and she didn’t feel like she could divide her time. May had just lost her mother, and her father had disappeared. May had needed every bit of love Sally had in her to give, but it wasn’t supposed to be forever.

  “I went up to Alaska and worked as a ranger in Denali National Park. It’s still rough up there, and they needed young men with no ties.”

  She frowned. “I didn’t want you to leave. I just needed to cool things off between us for a little while.”

  He shook his head. “I asked you to marry me, and you said May had to be first in your life. That told me what I needed to know.”

  She knew she’d hurt him all those years ago, but she hadn’t meant to. “I’m sorry for how things ended between us.”

  Jay simply shrugged. “About my niece…”

  “Do you have custody of her now?” Was that what had brought him back to town? She knew realistically it couldn’t have been her. She didn’t want to let him change the subject, but he’d come to see her for a specific reason, and it obviously wasn’t to rehash their old relationship.

  “Yeah. Her parents were killed in a car wreck right before school started. That’s why I’m back in Wiggieville, living on the ranch where I grew up.”

  “It was good of you to come back for her.”

  “I’m not an ogre, and I’m her last living relative. Anyway, can you ease up on the homework?”

  Sally shook her head. “The only way for me to do that would be to put her into the regular English class and take her out of honors. Is that what she wants?”

  Jay closed his eyes for a moment. He couldn’t believe she was being so unreasonable. “She just needs a few months to get over her parents’ deaths.”

  “Of course she does, but I can’t just make her homework lighter and not do the same for everyone. I know when May came to live with me, she needed the distraction of homework.”

  “You’re doing this to get back at me for leaving.”

  “Doing what? I’ve been teaching the same class for over twenty years. It’s no harder than it was when I started teaching here.” Sally sighed. “What’s happened between us is history. Ancient history. It’s Alison we need to worry about now.” She opened her grade book. “She’s got two essays she hasn’t turned in. If she can get them to me by Monday morning, I won’t mark her down for being late.”

  “You want her to write two essays in one weekend? That’s insane!”

  She shook her head. “It’s really not. She’s a smart girl.”

  “What if she needs help? She said she doesn’t understand the play.”

  Sally frowned. “I’ll work with her on Saturday night if she really doesn’t understand. I don’t mind.”

  Jay raised an eyebrow. “No plans on Saturday night?”

  “I’ve never had much of a social life, and since May married in August, it’s worse than ever.” She didn’t add that he was the only man she’d dated since college. Why bother? He’d already decided she wasn’t worth his time.

  “May got married?” Jay shook his head. “Isn’t she sixteen or something?”

  Sally smiled at that. “She’s thirty-three, and a bestselling author. She’s absolutely incredible.” Her satisfaction in her niece came through strong in her voice.

  “What does she write?” He’d never been much of a reader.

  “Romantic comedy. I’m pretty proud of her.”

  He wrinkled his nose. “Romance?”

  Sally nodded. “I used to laugh at romances, but you know what? May’s as smart as they come, and I’ve read her books. She’s good.”

  “Forgive me if I don’t read one to see if I agree with you.”

  She shrugged. “Do what you want, but don’t discount romance as if it’s not worth reading. I used to, but now I know that for most women, they’re the only form of happily ever after they’ll ever get.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “I offered you a happily ever after, and you told me you didn’t want it. Remember?”

  “I told you I needed some time before I could take it. There’s a difference.”

  “Why would it have been so much harder to raise May with a man there to help you? Did you think I was that terrible with children?” He’d thought that marrying her and sharing her load would make her life easier, not harder.

  Sally rubbed her hands over her face. “The night before you asked me to marry you, I’d gotten home to find May holding an empty bottle of pills in her hand. I asked her what she was doing with it. Do you know what she told me?”

  He shook his head. “No idea.”

  “She told me she wished it w
as full so she could take them all and just escape. She wanted to be with her mother because it was too hard on earth.” Sally felt a tear drift down her cheek. “I knew her father had trouble with depression, and I figured that’s why he’d disappeared. I couldn’t let her go down that road as well. She needed my one-hundred-percent, not only the part of me that wasn’t busy being a newlywed with you.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me that then?” Jay stared at her, wishing that she’d told him with everything inside him. He’d have waited for as long as it took—if he’d known there was something to wait for.

  “Because I didn’t feel like it was my story to tell. He showed up last month, which shocked both of us.”

  “Her father? Are you kidding me? Was that the first time?”

  Sally nodded. “May didn’t want to see him. I talked her into it because I knew that even if she chose never to see him again afterward, she needed the closure.”

  “He didn’t have any right to see her after all that time. Twenty years with no contact? She should have slapped him and walked out.”

  “He tried to kill himself. He spent six months institutionalized, and then he watched her from afar. He knew he wasn’t up to taking care of her, so he left her with me.” She shook her head. “He was there for her valedictory speech, for her college graduation. All the milestones he could be there for, he was. He just didn’t tell her he was there.”

  “Did she forgive him?”

  “Yeah, she forgave him. I don’t think she’ll ever trust him again, though. She’s taking it slowly. I’m supposed to call him as soon as she goes into labor.”

  “Wait—May’s pregnant?” He smiled. “I guess this means you’re going to be a grandmother.”

  Sally’s grin transformed her face to the young woman he remembered. He’d never known her to be carefree because he’d met her as her sister was dying of breast cancer, but she hadn’t always had the weight of the world on her shoulders.

  “Yeah. She and Bob are having a baby. Don’t know if it’s a boy or girl yet, but I kind of hope it’ll be a girl—even if Bob will insist on naming her Bobbette.”

  He wrinkled his nose. “Bobbette? Are you kidding me?”

  She shook her head. “She married Bob Bodefeld.”

  “Why is that name familiar to me? Did he live in Wiggieville way back when I was here?”

  “No, he’s an actor. He’s on the show Lazy Love.”

  Jay shrugged. “I’ve heard of it, but never seen it.”

  “It’s a good show. May has watched it since the first episode.”

  “I see. It sounds like she’s happy. I’m glad.” Even though you gave up my happiness for her.

  “She is happy. And best of all, she’s a good person.” Sally stacked the things she needed to take home into a pile, getting ready to leave. It was already well after five. “I’ll come by around seven on Saturday evening. Does that work?”

  “Yeah, that’s fine.” He opened her door for her, took her books, and walked her to her car just as he had so many times in the past.

  She stopped in front of her small red car, using her remote to unlock it. She didn’t usually drive to school because she lived close by, but it had been raining when she’d left that morning. “Thanks for carrying my books,” she said softly. He had done that for her several times back when they were dating. He’d stop by school after the students left and visit her classroom. Their first kiss had been in the same room where he’d just visited her.

  “You still live in the same house?” he asked, his mind obviously going back to their relationship all those years ago as well.

  She nodded. “Yeah. It was a tight fit for the two of us, but now that May’s on her own, I’m fine there. It’s a good little house.”

  He nodded, giving her books back to her. “I’ll see you on Saturday, I guess.”

  “I’ll be there.” She put her books into the passenger seat and started the car, slowly closing the door. As she pulled out onto the main street of Wiggieville, he was still standing in the same place, watching her drive away.

  Sally opened her front door and walked to the dining room, putting her books on the table. She collapsed into one of the chairs and buried her face in her hands, her mind automatically playing scenes from the past.

  The first time she’d met Jay, they’d been at the hardware store where he’d been buying some nails for fence repair while she’d been trying to decide which tool kit to buy for her new house. He’d picked up a basic kit, without the cute pink case she’d been eyeing, and handed it to her. “You won’t need anything more than this.”

  “Are you sure?” she’d asked. “What about the pink one?” She was really drawn to it, and looked back and forth between it and the one he’d handed her.

  He shrugged. “The tools look cheap, and you’d pay twice as much for less quality. Unless you’re stupid, and I can see you’re not, don’t buy the pink.”

  She smiled. “Thanks. I appreciate your help.”

  “No problem. You just get your own place?”

  She nodded. “I did. I had an apartment in Weatherford for a while, but I just bought a house here in Wiggieville. I teach English at the high school.”

  He’d made a face. “You like all that poetic nonsense, then?”

  She smiled. “Some of it. Not all. I’m not a huge fan of Burns or Wordsworth, but I’ll read Rostand any day of the week.”

  “Rostand? Never heard of him.”

  “The only thing he’s known for is Cyrano de Bergerac. I’d be willing to bet that I’m the only person of your acquaintance to have read the play forty-seven times.”

  He laughed. “Forty-seven, huh? Is it that good?”

  “I think so.” She’d started walking toward the checkout counter, glad to see he was walking with her. “I’m Sally, by the way. Sally Jackson.”

  “Jay Graber. Good to meet you.”

  “What do you do, Jay Graber?”

  He’d rubbed the back of his neck, obviously embarrassed that she was showing an interest in him. “I’m a rancher. My folks retired and moved to Florida. Left me the ranch.”

  “I thought people from the north were supposed to retire to Florida, not people from Texas.”

  “My mom has this obsession with Disney, and they moved out there to be close to the mouse. I don’t get it, but I guess I’m not supposed to.”

  “Well, that’s cool. Do they go often?”

  “Every day, it seems. Dad says if he never sees another Disney Princess, it’ll be too soon.”

  She laughed. “I guess that’s the way it goes.” She set the tool kit he’d chosen on the counter and paid for it. “Thanks for helping me. I really appreciate it.”

  “No problem.” He shuffled his feet for a minute, looking down at his hands. “Do you want to give me your number? You know, in case you need some help fixing something?”

  “If I need help, and you have my number, how will you know I need help?” she asked logically, loving his shyness.

  “I guess I’ll have to give you mine too.” He blushed, obviously embarrassed that she’d pointed out the error in his thinking. “Okay, what I really want to know is if I can have your number and take you out for dinner sometime.”

  She pulled a pen and scrap of paper from her purse and quickly scrawled her name and number. “I’d love to go to dinner with you. Call me.” She’d rushed from the store, feeling bold. She’d never given her number to a man she’d just met before. All of her college friends had called her weird and old-fashioned, but she hadn’t cared. Now, though, she was willing to take a chance because she could tell this man was really special.

  Sally rubbed her hand over her face. She was older now. She didn’t even know if Jay had married since she’d last seen him. Having him walk into her classroom had been a shock. She wished she could say she hadn’t thought of him in years, but she had. Every single day. She’d never been able to get him out of her mind—or her heart.

  She stood and started
to prepare dinner. Another lonely meal. Another lonely night. Just like all the others.

  * * *

  Jay watched as Sally drove away, flooded with memories of her. He was glad he’d had time to prepare for seeing her again because if they’d just run into each other in town, he wasn’t sure he’d have been able to handle it.

  It had taken all his willpower not to lean down and kiss her. Her lips looked as soft as he’d remembered. She’d gained a little weight over the years, but she looked better now. She’d been much too thin before.

  He walked to his truck, sliding behind the wheel and heading to the house he shared with his belligerent fifteen-year-old niece. He knew she’d been through a lot, but she didn’t have to be so snotty to him. He should ask Sally if May had ever gone through a phase of hating her because she was the one who’d lived while her mother had died.

  As he drove, he thought about his first kiss with Sally. He couldn’t get her out of his mind. He never had. All those years in Alaska, sometimes he wouldn’t see anyone for days on end. All those nights dreaming of her.

  He’d gone to her classroom a couple of weeks after meeting her. They’d been on a few dates, but he hadn’t been able to get up the courage to kiss her. He’d spent all day talking to his horse as he’d mended fences, trying to figure out how he was going to get past the milestone. Every time he looked at her, his knees turned to mush. He was surprised he was able to speak coherently in her presence.

  Walking through the empty halls to her class, he almost turned back three times. Finally, he’d mumbled to himself, “Just do it. She won’t bite. Probably. And would it be so bad if she did?” The humor had made him go on.

  He knocked at her door and waited for a moment, entering when she’d called, “Come in!”

  She’d looked surprised but happy to see him. “Hi! I didn’t think I’d see you again till Friday evening.”

  He shrugged. “I just thought I’d come see if you needed someone to carry your books.” His words had sounded lame, even to him, but he’d already lost his nerve. He couldn’t kiss her.