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Cruel Love

Kate Brian




  CRUEL

  LOVE

  CHECK OUT ALL THE BOOKS IN THE

  NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING PRIVATE

  AND PRIVILEGE SERIES BY KATE BRIAN

  PRIVATE

  INVITATION ONLY

  UNTOUCHABLE

  CONFESSIONS

  INNER CIRCLE

  LEGACY

  AMBITION

  REVELATION

  PARADISE LOST

  SUSPICION

  SCANDAL

  VANISHED

  OMINOUS

  VENGEANCE

  LAST CHRISTMAS

  THE BOOK OF SPELLS

  * * *

  PRIVILEGE

  BEAUTIFUL DISASTER

  PERFECT MISTAKE

  SWEET DECEIT

  PURE SIN

  CRUEL LOVE

  An imprint of Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing Division 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, New York 10020

  www.SimonandSchuster.com

  This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real locales are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2011 by Alloy Entertainment

  All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form.

  is a trademark of

  Simon & Schuster, Inc.

  The Simon & Schuster Speakers Bureau can bring authors to your live event. For more information or to book an event, contact the Simon & Schuster Speakers Bureau at 1-866-248-3049 or visit our website at www.simonspeakers.com.

  Produced by Alloy Entertainment

  151 West 26th Street, New York, NY 10001

  Book design by Andrea C. Uva

  The text of this book was set in Adobe Garamond.

  Manufactured in the United States of America

  2 4 6 8 10 9 7 5 3 1

  Library of Congress Control Number: 2011925963

  ISBN 978-1-4424-0788-6

  ISBN 978-1-4424-0789-3 (eBook)

  For Lanie, from beginning to end

  Contents

  Chapter 1: Unfair

  Chapter 2: Comforts

  Chapter 3: Come Together

  Chapter 4: The Honor

  Chapter 5: What Friends are for

  Chapter 6: Figments

  Chapter 7: Uncle Jazz

  Chapter 8: A Plan

  Chapter 9: The Nomination

  Chapter 10: Benevolent

  Chapter 11: The Wrong Girl

  Chapter 12: Blast from the Past

  Chapter 13: Catharsis

  Chapter 14: The Dungeon

  Chapter 15: A Lock

  Chapter 16: The Coup

  Chapter 17: So Well

  Chapter 18: Heaven and Hell

  Chapter 19: Honor her Memory

  Chapter 20: If not for her

  Chapter 21: Peace of Mind

  Chapter 22: Therapist Past

  Chapter 23: Psychic

  Chapter 24: Former Life

  Chapter 25: The Obligatory Entourage

  Chapter 26: Holding Out

  Chapter 27: Too Easy

  Chapter 28: Mental Health

  Chapter 29: Benevolence

  Chapter 30: Resignation

  Chapter 31: Back on Track

  Chapter 32: Last Meal

  Chapter 33: Happy Birthday

  Chapter 34: Evidence

  Chapter 35: A Promise

  Chapter 36: Almost Everything

  Chapter 37: Stalking her Prey

  Chapter 38: Over

  Chapter 39: Graduation

  Acknowledgments

  UNFAIR

  All around Ariana Osgood, the sounds of the emergency room dimmed to a dull hum. The flashing red lights outside the thick-paned window faded in and out. An ancient coffee machine in the corner hissed as it gurgled hot brown liquid into a mug. A few droplets of fresh, red blood splattered the tiles as someone limped by. A child cried. A mother screamed. Someone, somewhere, begged for help. But Ariana was unaware. For her, time had stopped.

  For her, there was nothing in the world but Reed Brennan.

  She must die … she must die … she must die …

  The mantra pounded at the base of her skull like a drumbeat, a call to arms, a battle march.

  She must die … she must die … she must die …

  Ariana focused on Reed’s mouth. On her lips. The lying, back-stabbing, love-of-her-life-stealing lips, as they babbled away to a police officer. Spewing more lies, no doubt. Explaining things away. Claiming innocence. Poor, poor Reed. Always, always, always the victim. Steadily, the mantra grew faster.

  She must die … she must die … she must—

  There was a slam over by the admittance desk and suddenly the world zipped back into focus. Noise and color and light and pain crashed in on Ariana from all sides.

  “… don’t know what happened,” Reed was saying. She hugged her scrawny arms around her scrawnier waist. “I thought she had a ride home. I was sure he was driving her home …”

  A tear slipped from Reed’s eye and she swiped it away. Ariana tilted her head. It was amazing, really, how unchanged the girl was. Same bland, shapeless clothes, except, oddly, her coat appeared to be a bland Kenneth Cole number rather than a bland Old Navy. Same dirt-brown hair. Same off-putting angular features. Same dull brown eyes. She wasn’t as tall as Ariana remembered. Certainly not as strong. In fact, Ariana was quite certain that if she walked over there right now, wrapped her fingers around Reed’s skinny neck and squeezed, she could have her dead within a minute.

  She must die … she must die … she must die …

  Ariana’s fingers twitched at her sides. Her mouth began to water. This was it. Her opportunity. The moment she’d been anticipating for three long years. It would have been marvelous if she had been able to execute her original plan and shoved Reed off the roof of Billings House those many moons ago. It would have been dramatic and messy and best of all, done. But this … this would be so much more poetic. She would look Reed in the eyes as she died. Watch the light and the life go out of her. Feel her agony, her desperation, her fear. She would witness the very moment that Reed recognized it was over—that Ariana had won. That she had finally, finally won.

  She must die … she must die … she must die …

  “I should really call her roommate. She must be freaking out,” Reed said.

  She tugged a cell phone out of her pocket and began to turn. In half a second, she would be facing Ariana. Their eyes would meet. Ariana couldn’t breathe.

  “Ana. I need to talk to you.”

  Someone grabbed Ariana’s arm. She looked up into the stricken, pale face of her soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend, Palmer Liriano. His green eyes were raw and his brown hair mussed, as if he’d run his hands over it and back a thousand times. Behind him, Soomie Ahn sobbed against Maria Stanzini’s shoulder, her straight black hair sticking to the tears on her cheeks. Jasper Montgomery talked in low tones with Landon Jacobs and Adam Lazzerri, all of them looking fearful and gaunt. Tahira Al-Mahmood cried silently as her boyfriend, Rob Mellon, tried to console her. Everyone she knew was gathered around, looking out-of-place in their formalwear, elaborate hair, and carefully applied makeup as they whispered, blubbered, and prayed. Prayed for Lexa Greene, Ariana’s best friend, who had tried to kill herself by jumping through the glass roof of the greenhouse at Maria’s mansion.

  And just like that, the drumbeat stopped. Ariana’s world snapped back into focus. Her real world. The world in which she now lived. One that didn’t include Reed Brennan. One that couldn’t include her. Reed turned toward Ariana, and Ariana buried her face in Palmer’s ch
est. She took in a few hopelessly broken breaths, squeezed her eyes shut, and closed her hand around her forearm.

  Get it under control, Ariana. Get it under control.

  She gripped her own arm as hard as she could, her fingernails digging into the skin.

  “Ana? Ana? Are you okay?”

  Palmer’s strong hands closed over her shoulders. He pushed her back slightly so he could look into her eyes. Ariana blinked up at him. In her peripheral vision, she saw that Reed was gone. Maybe outside to make her call. Maybe to the bathroom. Maybe back to the Georgetown campus, where Ariana knew she currently lived. Whatever the case, for the moment, the danger was over.

  Slowly, Ariana began to breathe again.

  She nodded shakily. “Sorry. I just … I got dizzy there for a second … thinking about all the … the blood,” she improvised.

  “Okay. You’re all right now?” Palmer asked, his tone all business.

  Ariana looked down at her arm. She was bleeding. Her fingernails had broken the skin. She covered up the wounds with her palm, trying not to wince, and nodded again.

  “Anything new about Lexa?” she asked.

  Palmer shook his head. “No.” Keeping his hands on her shoulders, he ducked his chin to look her in the eye. “Ana, you’ve been spending more time with her than anyone. Did you have any idea that she was thinking about … about doing this?”

  “No,” Ariana said. “I mean, we all know she’s been acting a little off lately, but …”

  Lexa had been acting more than a little off. Ever since Ariana had murdered Kaitlynn Nottingham in front of Lexa, she hadn’t been herself. She’d gone completely OCD and was prone to sudden, unexpected freak-outs and breakdowns. For the past few nights, Ariana had been feeding the girl Valium to help her sleep, and it seemed to have been working, but that evening Jasper had said something about knowing Ariana and Lexa’s secret, and Lexa had assumed the worst—wrongly. Before Ariana could tell Lexa they were safe, Lexa came crashing through the glass ceiling.

  “But if you knew something, you would have told someone, right?” Palmer demanded, his eyes intense. “You know you’re supposed to tell someone? You’re supposed to get the person help.”

  Ariana stared up at him, trying to process his words—his patronizing tone. “Palmer … if I’d thought Lexa was going to kill herself, of course I would have done something.”

  “I mean, you’re supposed to be her best friend, right? You’re supposed to know these things,” Palmer’s voice grew louder with each word. “Or maybe you guys weren’t as close as you were always claiming to be.”

  Ariana’s face was on fire. All her friends turned to stare.

  “Palmer, please. Calm down. You’re just upset,” Ariana said.

  “Of course I’m upset,” Palmer said, bringing his fist to his mouth. “Lexa’s in there clinging to life and you’re telling me there was nothing you could do to stop it.”

  “Palmer, that’s enough,” Jasper said, putting a hand on Palmer’s shoulder from behind. “This is not Ana’s fault.”

  “Get off me, man,” Palmer said, swiping Jasper’s arm away and starting to pace like a rabid animal. “All I know is, Ana and Lexa have spent every minute of every hour together for the past two weeks. How many times have you broken dates with me because you just had to hang out with your BFF?” he said sarcastically. “Well you couldn’t have been such great friends if you’d let her go off and do something like this!”

  “Palmer, stop!” Maria gasped.

  Suddenly, Palmer froze. He looked around at the gaping faces of his friends, as if realizing for the first time that they were there. Then he looked at Ariana. Her eyes burned with unshed tears and her chest heaved beneath her huge diamond necklace. Who the hell did he think he was? She was the one whose best friend was inches from death. He was supposed to be consoling her, not accusing her.

  I should have broken up with you before the party, she thought, clenching her teeth. I should have done it days ago.

  But she had been afraid. Afraid of losing her It-Girl status on the Atherton-Pryce Hall campus. So now, here she was, getting publicly berated on one of the worst nights of her life. One more nudge and she was going to lose it. She could feel it in her hot, trembling veins.

  “Screw you, Palmer,” Ariana said through her teeth.

  His brow knit. “What?”

  “We’re over,” she snapped.

  Everyone stared at Palmer. Ariana could see all the hurt and pain and confusion whirling in his eyes and, for once, had absolutely no idea what he was going to do next. Suddenly, he grabbed his overcoat off his chair and stood up straight.

  “Fine,” he said. “If that’s what you really want, then fine. We’re broken up.”

  He gave her a sidelong glance and Ariana was certain there was something else he wanted to say, but he thought the better of it, cleared his throat, and walked out of the emergency room.

  Ariana looked at Jasper, her true love, and just like that, the tears spilled over. He moved toward her like he was going to take her in his arms, but Maria and Soomie got there first. Which was just as well. No one knew that she and Jasper had been seeing each other behind Palmer’s back, and now didn’t seem like the right time to get into that drama.

  “He doesn’t really blame you,” Soomie said, holding Ariana’s hands as Maria brushed her hair back from her tear-stained face. “He’s just freaking out like the rest of us.”

  “Yeah, but he’s the only one who felt the need to go accusing Ana,” Maria said sarcastically. “Men are bastards,” she said under her breath.

  Ariana rested her head on Maria’s shoulder.

  “You know this isn’t your fault, right?” Soomie said, squeezing Ariana’s hands. “None of us saw this coming. None of us.”

  Ariana nodded. “I know,” she said, her voice thick.

  But I should have. I should have seen what was happening, she thought. And now Lexa’s in there dying because of me.

  She glanced over at the police officers who had taken Reed Brennan’s statement about whatever she had been blubbering about. She breathed in and out, trying to get the tears under control. Trying to make sense of everything that had happened. How was it possible that the one person in the world she would have liked to see dead had just walked out the door, and the one person in the world she would have liked to see live was practically dead in the next room?

  Sometimes, life was just so unfair.

  COMFORTS

  She must die … she must die … she must die …

  Somewhere between the hospital and the front gates of the Atherton-Pryce Hall campus, the mantra started up again. Ariana stared out the window as headlights flashed by and tried as hard as she could to block it out. She sang songs in her mind, she recited all the states and their capitals, she tried to remember the first, middle, and last names of everyone in her class at Atherton-Pryce.

  Nothing worked.

  By the time the taxi she’d shared with Jasper, Tahira, and Rob pulled up in front of the looming towers of Privilege House, she was exhausted in body, mind, and soul.

  “I wonder if everyone already knows,” Tahira said, staring up at the windows as Rob paid the cab driver. “That is not a story I want to tell over and over again.”

  “I say we just ignore everyone,” Rob said, squeezing her shoulder. “It’s what we usually do anyway.”

  He and Tahira exchanged a weary smirk and together, they all exited the car. The night air was frigid and Ariana wrapped her arms around herself, wondering why she hadn’t thought to wear a wrap over her gray gown. Jasper automatically put his arm around her and Ariana flinched. Rob and Tahira were right there. But then she remembered: She’d broken up with Palmer. She and Jasper could do whatever they wanted now.

  “I need coffee,” Tahira announced as they entered the lobby. Her shoulders were slumped, her usually perfectly applied makeup hadn’t been retouched all night, and her strapless black dress was in desperate need of a pulling-up.
But her appearance, for once, was clearly the last thing on her mind. “You guys wanna go sit in the café?”

  Jasper let Ariana go and they exchanged a glance. “No thanks. I’m pretty exhausted,” Ariana said. “I just want to go lie down and pretend this day never happened.”

  “Me as well,” Jasper said, rubbing his forehead. “I could sleep until next Tuesday.”

  “Okay then.” Tahira pulled Ariana into a hug. “She’s going to be okay, you know.”

  “I hope so,” she said flatly.

  “She will. She’s Lexa,” Tahira said with a confident smile. “She’s unstoppable.”

  Ariana ventured to smile, but she couldn’t seem to make it happen. If the last couple of weeks had proved anything, it was that Lexa wasn’t as strong a person as she’d once thought.

  “See you in the morning,” she said.

  Rob lifted a hand to Jasper and Ariana as he put his other arm around Tahira. Together they headed for the café on the far side of the common room. Jasper slipped his hands into the pockets of his suit pants and half smiled.

  “Shall we?”

  He hit the up button on the elevator that served the girls’ tower of the dorm. It pinged and the doors slid open. Together, they stepped inside. As soon as the doors closed, Ariana was in Jasper’s arms. Neither of them said a word as the elevator zipped them to the top floor. Ariana simply breathed in his spicy, comforting scent.

  The volume on the mantra dulled ever so slightly. Dulled to a slight thrum rather than a pounding beat.

  She must die … she must die … she must die …

  Upstairs, Jasper led Ariana back to her room. She paused for a moment at the threshold, looking around at the slight disarray left behind as she’d gotten ready for the fabulous formal Stone and Grave event they’d attended tonight. Tubes of mascara and lip gloss were still set up on her desk. The clutch purse she’d decided against sat at the foot of her bed, and a pair of black Christian Louboutins were upended near the closet. Ariana had agonized all day over which shoes to wear. Just thinking about it now—the awful shallowness of it all—made her want to throw the shoes out the window. Instead she kicked them into her closet, slammed the door, and went right for her dresser. She pulled an Atherton-Pryce Hall sweatshirt on over her head and unzipped her gown, letting it fall to the floor. Then she shimmied into a pair of yoga pants and climbed into bed, her diamond necklace still sparkling around her neck. Jasper undressed down to his T-shirt and pants and climbed in next to her. He put his arms around her and Ariana rested her cheek on his chest. The mantra now was barely audible.