Mommy Is Sick

Mommy Is Sick

  A Short Story

  by

  Julia Wittmann

  Copyright © 2015 by Julia Wittmann

  All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  BEFORE

  Mommy is sick. She has been crying a lot. I know that because I can see those puffy bags under her eyes. Her pretty eyes, they used to shine so bright, and now they are mostly empty. It scares me sometimes when I see that look on her face. It's as if she is looking into another world. Maybe she can see ghosts?

  Today she doesn't seem to notice me at all. I've been standing right next to her for ten minutes, but she doesn't even blink. It makes me sad. I want to cry, but I don't want mommy to be even more sad. So I don't cry, I don't say anything.

  Instead, I watch Rover sleep on his favorite blanket. He is my best friend. We often play outside for hours when the sun is shining. But today it has been raining since the early morning. Rover doesn't like the rain. He always sleeps all day when it rains.

  I wish mommy would play with me again. I don't even remember the last time we played together. I don't think we did since she came back from the doctor that day. That was the worst day of my life. Mommy was crying so much and I didn't know why. When daddy told me she was sick, I felt scared. Because I knew it was different this time. Usually when mommy is sick she coughs and sneezes, but this time she only cries all the time.

  I wish I could help her. When I give her a hug, she smiles at me, but it's a different smile. It's not the same smile she had when we used to play fetch with Rover. This smile is empty like her eyes.

  I feel so sorry for mommy. I want her to get better soon. I want to play hide-and-seek with her and daddy again. We always win because daddy is blind like a mole, she says. It's my favorite game. But it's no fun playing with daddy alone.

  Mommy keeps looking at the calendar. There is a red X two weeks from now. Daddy says that's when mommy goes on a long vacation. I don't understand why that makes her so sad. I love vacations! Our last vacation was to the Grand Canyon! It was so deep! I was a bit scared, but then Rover came over and I grabbed his collar. He always makes me feel safe.

  When I'm sad, he makes me smile because he is so silly. He loves licking my face. His tongue is so wet! He won't stop when I push him away, so daddy usually takes him away, and then Rover licks his face too! Mommy used to laugh at that. Now she doesn't even watch us anymore.

  I don't know why she is sick, but sometimes I think it's my fault. She doesn't kiss my head anymore and she doesn't sing to me anymore either. I hope it's not because I ate all those cookies from the forbidden jar. But I was so hungry! I know I should have asked first. Mommy must be really mad at me. Maybe that made her sick.

  I just hope she starts smiling again. Sometimes I make really silly faces in front of her, but even that doesn't work. So yesterday I had an idea. I went through all our family pictures and took the best ones and glued them into a photo album. Daddy helped me make it look pretty. We wrote only happy things underneath the pictures. Sometimes we wrote "smile," sometimes "we love you, " sometimes "woof" when Rover was in the picture too. I think mommy will really like this when we give it to her. Maybe she will smile again! I really want her to be happy.

  One time my friend from school said that her mommy thinks my mommy looks too skinny. I didn't like that, so I told her that mommy is sick. Then we didn't talk about it anymore. I don't know why it made me so angry. It's true that my mommy is skinny. She has lost a lot of weight in the last few months. Her hair is falling out too. When I asked her why, she only said that she was very busy and that's why she is so thin. Daddy said the same thing. But I know it's because she is sick. I have seen other sick people on TV and they don't look very busy.

  Last week when we went shopping together, mommy did something very strange. We walked past a shop with lots of large wooden boxes. Mommy went inside to pick up a brochure. She kept looking at those wooden boxes for a long time and then she started to cry. I felt really bad for her. Maybe she couldn't find what she was looking for. I get sad, too, when I look for my favorite doll and can't find her. Mommy cried the whole time on the way home. I wanted to say something, but I didn't know what, so I just looked at my feet.

  When we got home, she went straight to the bathroom and stayed there for a very long time. I know because she left the ice cream carton on the table and when I went back to eat some, it was all soft and runny.

  I don't sleep so good anymore. I often think about mommy and then I feel sad. Sometimes I cry before I fall asleep, but I make sure that mommy and daddy don't see me. I don't want them to be mad at me. Rover always comes to cuddle with me when I'm sad. He knows when I cry, even when I hide under the covers. I can't cry for long when he is with me. His fur tickles me so much that I have to giggle. And then he licks my face.

  It's getting late. My tummy is hungry. But mommy is still sitting at the table and staring at the wall. I don't want to say anything and scare her, because last time I did, she jumped up screaming. She must have thought I was a ghost. So I don't want her to be scared again. Daddy keeps saying I'm a big girl now and big girls can make their own sandwiches. I have made it before, but it never tastes as good as when mommy makes it for me. She always makes it taste super yummy. Daddy doesn't know what she puts on the sandwich, and I'm afraid to ask her. Maybe I'll just eat an apple.

  Rover looks at me with big eyes. He must be hungry too. I offer him my apple, but he only sniffs at it and walks away. If I make a sandwich, I can share it with him. I know he likes it because he stole it from me once. Then daddy got really angry and made Rover stay in the backyard until after dinner. But daddy is still at work, so if I share my sandwich with Rover, he won't know.

  The fridge door is heavy. It feels like glue when I open it. I put all the food on the counter and make my sandwich. Mommy still ignores me. But I don't mind as long as she doesn't cry again. I drop a slice of cheese on the floor for Rover. He is so fast! He loves cheese! I give him another slice. He smiles at me with his cute doggy smile. If only mommy would watch us! Rover looks so funny right now. He is drooling and wagging his tail. I love his furry tail! Daddy keeps saying it would make a nice broom. But I think that's mean.

  I eat most of my sandwich and leave a little bit for Rover. He almost bites off my hand! He must be really hungry. He licks the rest of the crumbs from my hand, making it all clean. It tickles so much! His ears suddenly shoot up. He turns his head and gets all tense. His tail is wagging again. I know what that means! Daddy is coming home!

  Rover runs to the door and I follow him as fast as I can. The door clicks unlocked and opens up wide. Daddy is standing in the doorway and his raincoat is dripping. I want to hug him, but he wants to take off his wet clothes first. Rover is jumping from one side to the other and barking happily. I love it when he does that.

  Daddy pats Rover's head and then bends down to give me a kiss on the cheek. His lips are cold and his stubbles are scratchy, but I still like it. Then daddy walks into the kitchen and hugs mommy. Finally, mommy gets up from her chair and hugs daddy back. I watch them from the doorway. It makes me happy to see them together. Daddy kisses her on the mouth and whispers something to her. I don't know what he says, but mommy smiles at him. That's her first smile today! Maybe she would have smiled earlier if I had kissed her too.

  Daddy brought home some take-out food because mommy doesn't like to cook anymore. He puts all the dishes on the table and we sit down together. Mommy still ignores me, but at least she looks happy now. She keeps holding daddy's hand while we eat in silence. Rover is sitting by my side and beg
ging for food. Daddy starts talking to mommy about work, so I use that moment to give Rover a piece of chicken. He sucks it up like a vacuum cleaner, my auntie would say. I would give him more, but daddy noticed what I did. He doesn't like it when I feed Rover at the table. He says it makes Rover beg even more. I don't mind, but I don't want to make daddy mad, so I stop feeding Rover. He is very smart. He understands everything that's going on. Sometimes I wish Rover could talk. Then I could ask him why mommy is so sick and why she doesn't like me anymore.

  I finish my plate and watch daddy and mommy talk. She says something about pain in her stomach and going to the doctor. Daddy seems sad now. He is quiet for a moment and then looks at me. "Why don't you get the little surprise we have for your mom?" I jump up from my chair and run up the stairs to my room. Rover is following me and barking playfully. He thinks it's a game. Silly Rover! I take out the photo album from my desk drawer and take a look inside. I like those pictures! Mommy and daddy smile in every one of them. I'm sure that mommy will love this.

  Rover and I run down the stairs again. I almost fall because Rover bumps into me. Together we race into the kitchen and I put the photo album on the table in front of mommy. I say, "Daddy and I made this for you," and give her a kiss on the cheek. Mommy smiles at me! She even strokes my hair as she opens the photo album. She turns the page and laughs out loud. Daddy is laughing too. It makes me happy, so I giggle with them. Rover finds it funny and wags his tail again. Together we look at every single photo and talk about the happy times we have had. I can tell that mommy is feeling much better now. She doesn't ignore me anymore. We sit close together. It's a nice feeling. I want to remember this moment forever.

  AFTERWARDS

  Everything is different now. Nothing is the same. Daddy is different. Rover is different. I am different. I miss mommy. I miss her very much. Every day I think of her when I get up and when I come back home from school and nobody is there. When I go to bed at night, I miss mommy even more. I keep thinking back to that one night when I gave her my photo album. That's how I want to remember her. I try to forget the days that followed that night when mommy was really weak and tired.

  I remember she left before the day that was marked on the calendar. One morning I woke up and mommy wasn't there. The next time I saw her she was in one of those large wooden boxes, and now I know what they are for. I miss mommy so much. I often cry now. Rover still comes to cuddle with me, but that doesn't even help. I can't stop crying. I feel very lonely. Daddy works a lot. He doesn't talk very much to me anymore. My auntie comes to visit me every other day now. She wants to play games with me, but I don't really want to play with her. I want to play with mommy. I miss her so much.

  Sometimes I still smell her perfume. I don't tell daddy, but when he's not home, I keep playing the answering machine so I can hear mommy's voice again.

  Everything has changed. Even Rover is sad. He doesn't want to play very much and spends most of the day sleeping on his blanket.

  The days seem long. School is boring. I don't know if I can ever be happy again...

  ONE YEAR LATER

  I can't stop giggling! Silly Rover! He is licking my face because I had some ice cream, and Rover loves ice cream!

  I had a good day today. We went to the zoo and I saw my favorite animal. A penguin. Susan was there too. I really like her. She is so funny. She keeps joking around with me and often plays with Rover.

  It's been a year since mommy went away. I think of her a lot. I still miss her, but it doesn't hurt as much anymore. Daddy started smiling again. He seems happy now that he is with Susan. I really like her, but she is not like mommy. The three of us often go out to the museum or the zoo. I'm really glad that daddy is happy again. Last year wasn't easy for us. I think he missed mommy very much too. But after he met Susan, he started making jokes again, more like the old daddy I know. Now he even lets me feed Rover at the table! I think Rover must be the happiest dog in the world.

  Next weekend Susan is going to move in with us. Daddy was worried that I might be against it, but I told him it's okay. Susan often tells me funny stories from her childhood. She says back then life was much simpler and kind of boring, so the children would often think of silly things to do. One time she and her older brother drew a moustache on their mommy's face while she was sleeping. They had to wash the dishes for a whole week after that! I would never do that, of course. I'm a nice girl. Everybody says so. The only bad thing I did was eating those cookies before asking first. For a while I was worried that mommy would still be mad at me in heaven. Daddy told me not to be silly. He said she loves me very much and is not mad at all. I love her too.

  I put a picture of her, Rover and me on my nightstand. Before I go to bed, I always kiss her goodnight. It helps me sleep better. I also keep a diary. Susan said it would be a good idea to write down my feelings every day. I think she is very smart. When I'm sad, I write a few sentences, and that helps a lot. Sometimes I even write two pages! But that's mostly about funny things that Rover did. I could write a whole book about Rover! He is still my best friend. If he weren't a dog, I would marry him one day. Susan always laughs when I say that. So I keep saying it. I think Rover understands what I say because he gives me kisses when I talk about him.

  I'm happy. My teachers say I look happier too. School is also more fun now. My new favorite subject is biology. I love animals! One day I want to be a vet so I can help sick animals. Daddy says mommy would be proud of me. I think so too. I want to be just as good as mommy. So when Rover ever gets sick, I can make him healthy again. I want him to stay my friend for a long time.

  What a silly dog! He won't stop licking me. I love you, Rover. Just like I love mommy. I hope we can be together forever!

  - The End -

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