like antelope, monkeys,
caimans, and lizards.
They are constrictors
who coil themselves
around their prey before eating them.
With each breath their victim takes, the
python coils itself tighter until the prey
stops breathing. Then they swallow them
WHOLE, digesting everything except stuff
like eggshells, beaks, fur, and feathers.
Those indigestible items wind up as snake
poop. The bigger the meal, the longer it
takes to digest, so sometimes a python
needs to eat only four or five times a year.
CHAPTER FIVE
a sPeCiAl
gUeSt
Einstein decided his show needed
a remote segment with a special
guest to boost ratings.
He knew none of the students could
hear him, but when he was singing the
song he made up about prefixes and
suffixes a few nights ago, he could’ve
sworn the custodian was humming along.
Maybe Mr. Wright was just waiting
for an invitation to appear on
AnSwEr . . . thAt . . . QuEStiON.
“Ladies and gentlemen, I’d like to
introduce Mr. Wright, the custodian
of our wonderful school. Mr. Wright,
say hello to the people at home!”
But Mr. Wright didn’t say a thing.
“Mr. Wright, since you’re in charge
of the school’s recycling program,
you should be an expert on today’s
segment of AnSwEr . . . thAt . . .
QuEStiON!”
Silence.
“Here’s your first question: If a can
ISN’T recycled, it can sit around and
clutter up the planet for how long?
Take your time, Mr. Wright.”
More silence.
“Any guesses? One year? Two? The
answer is 100 years! That’s a long
time, don’t you agree?”
Mr. Wright continued to mop up the
vomit in the hallway.
“Maybe you’ll have better luck with
this next question. Ready? If an
aluminum can is recycled, how long
before that recycled can is back on
the grocery shelf?”
Silence. Silence. Silence.
“Care to venture a guess?” Einstein
asked. “Well, it takes only TWO
MONTHS to completely recycle a
can into a new, usable one. That is
one fun fact!”
I guess Mr. Wright can’t hear me
after all, Einstein thought. All this
dead air is killing my show!
“I’d like to thank my special guest,
Mr. Wright. I hope everyone at home
enjoyed this segment of AnSwEr . . .
thAt . . . QuEStiON.”
“Tough show today,” Einstein told
Marlon. “Mr. Wright was Mr. Totally
Wrong.”
Marlon shrugged, which is pretty
tough to do when most of your body
is tucked inside a shell. “Do all rodents
talk to themselves, or is it just you?”
Einstein didn’t let Marlon deter
him. He KNEW his show was good. If
only he could get the kids to tune in.
Einstein looked around the class-
room. How could he do Tasty Tidbits
without Ned cheering him on?
“Be right there!” Ned called from his
locker. “I won’t let you down.”
Einstein smiled at his buddy. It was
nice having a reliable friend.
Scientists disagree on whether the large
clumps of sperm whales’ undigested waste
that sometimes wash up on shore are
actually vomit or poop. The mass of waste
is called ambergris and can float in the
ocean for years. If found, ambergris is
worth a fortune. And what is
this whale waste
prized for? It’s
used to make
perfume.
CHAPTER SIX
nEd aSkS eInStEiN
fOr hElP
Ms. Moreno burst into the classroom.
“You wouldn’t believe what I saw on
TV last night! The hit show KIDS KNOW
STUFF is looking all around the country
for classes to compete, and they’re
holding auditions next week—here in
town!”
Einstein usually tried to ignore Ms.
Moreno, but was she talking about a
GAME SHOW?
“The topics they cover on the show
are the same subjects we’ve been
studying all year. I can’t imagine a
better class to represent our town
than this one!” Ms. Moreno did her
little happy dance around her desk.
“How about a class field trip to the
audition? What do you say?”
“We say yes!” Bonnie shouted.
“Absolutely!” said Ricky.
Ned snuck over to the pencil
sharpener to talk to Einstein.
“You’ve got to let me come!” Einstein
said. “No one in this class knows more
about game shows than I do.”
“Ms. Moreno won’t let you go on a
field trip,” Ned said. “There’s no way.”
“Please!” Einstein pleaded.
“I’m sorry, Einstein.” Ned finished
sharpening his pencil and went back
to his desk.
“Okay, class!” Ms. Moreno said. “Take
out your—”
But before she could finish the
sentence, Ms. Moreno fell sound
asleep at her desk.
Bonnie took a pillow from the
reading loft and tucked it underneath
Ms. Moreno’s head. “Looks like
Boerring Elementary doesn’t get a
shot at KIDS KNOW STUFF after all,”
Bonnie whispered.
“Instead of FUN facts, it’s more like
DONE facts,” Ricky added.
Einstein perked up his tiny hamster
ears. They need me, he thought.
This is my moment to shine!
“Don’t get any ideas,” Marlon said.
“Nobody wants help from a hamster.”
“Stop being so negative, Marlon.
You’ll never reach your full turtle
potential that way.”
Marlon tucked his head into his
shell. “You’re on your own, Einstein.”
That whole hiding-in-
the-shell thing is such a
cop-out, Einstein thought.
Einstein climbed on his hamster
wheel and started to run. Faster,
then faster still. If he couldn’t go to
the game show with the class, at
least he could help them study for
the audition. He just had to figure
out a way to get through to them.
Believe it or not, turtles have been around
for 200 million years. They live on every
continent except one. (Can you guess? It’s
Antarctica.) All turtles lay their eggs on
land; baby turtles have an egg tooth they
use to break out of the egg when it’s time
to hatch. Like other reptiles, turtles are
cold-blooded. They may have a reputation
for being slow, but sea turtles swim faster
than any other reptile. And on level
&nbs
p; ground, the smooth softshell turtle can
sometimes outrun a human.
CHAPTER SEVEN
a fEw wOrDs aBoUt
mS. mOrEnO
The students had some theories
about Ms. Moreno’s constant napping:
That Ms. Moreno suffered from
a sleeping disorder.
That her neighbors were incredibly
loud and kept Ms. Moreno up all
night.
That Ms. Moreno was the rare
individual who needed eighteen
hours of sleep each day.
Because Einstein had to stay at
Ms. Moreno’s sometimes, he knew
the REAL reason for her daily
catnaps. Ms. Moreno fell asleep
throughout the day because she
stayed up all night watching
infomercials. Ms. Moreno loved
hearing about the latest gadgets,
weight-loss programs, and skin-
cleansing regimens advertised late
at night. Her wee hours were filled
with juicers and yoga DVDs and
ceramic knives. There just weren’t
enough hours in the day to learn
about all these fabulous products.
It was too bad KIDS KNOW STUFF
wouldn’t be asking any questions
about how to add sparkly beads to
your clothes because that was one
audition Ms. Moreno would ace.
If you’re wondering whether sleep
disorders are real, they are. More than
20 percent of Americans suffer from
chronic sleep loss. And not
getting enough sleep
can have disastrous
effects: More than
1,500 people a year
die because drivers fall
asleep at the wheel.
Cars aren’t the only
place where it’s deadly
to fall asleep. Tired people making
critical decisions contributed to the
Exxon Valdez oil spill, the Chernobyl
nuclear disaster, and the Challenger
space shuttle explosion. It’s important
to get your sleep!
CHAPTER EIGHT
eInStEiN’s
pLaN
“Your class will never pass the
audition next week with Ms. Moreno
asleep all the time,” Einstein said. “So
I’m stepping in as teacher.”
“But no one else in the class can
hear you,” Ned said.
“That’s why YOU have to translate,”
Einstein said.
“How’s THAT going to work?”
Einstein patiently explained his plan.
“I’ll review my notes with you, then
YOU tell the other students what I’m
saying.”
“I can’t tell them a hamster helped
me study—they’ll think I’m nuts!
Besides, no one listens to me.”
“But you’re the smartest kid in
class.”
“You’re just saying that because I’m
the only one who talks to you.”
“Come on,” Einstein pleaded. “You
and I are the best chance this class
has to get on that show.”
When Ned looked over at Ms.
Moreno snoring at her desk, he had
to agree Einstein had a point. “I’m not
sure the other kids will believe the
class hamster not only talks but has
been taking notes,” Ned said.
“Once they realize I can help them,
they’ll TOTALLY believe it.”
Ned knew his classmates liked
having Einstein in the class and liked
taking him out of his cage to hold
him. But Ned doubted any of them
could comprehend a class hamster
who knew more about the solar
system than they did.
“Why don’t I just teach the class?”
Ned suggested. “Don’t you think that
makes more sense?”
“I WANT TO TEACH THE CLASS!”
Einstein cried. “IT’S MY DREAM!”
Ned had never seen a hamster have
a tantrum before. It was NOT a
pretty sight.
“Okay, okay,” Ned said. “I’ll translate
for you.”
“Good! Let me just freshen up
backstage.”
Ned slowly approached Ms. Moreno’s
desk. This was a terrible idea.
“Um...I have a plan for how we can
ace the audition without Ms. Moreno,”
Ned told the class. “But it’s pretty hard
to believe.”
Bonnie looked up from her comic
book. Ricky put away his phone.
“I found someone who can tutor us,”
Ned said. “Someone who’s been in our
classroom all along.”
talking about?
CUPCAKES
ARE NOT
VEGETABLES
“This is it,” Einstein told Marlon.
“The day EVERYONE gets to play
AnSwEr...thAt...QuEStiON.”
Marlon let out a sigh. “You don’t
have a game show,” the turtle said
for the millionth time. “You answer
your own questions.”
But Einstein wasn’t listening. His
moment of fame was finally here.
“You probably won’t be able to hear
him, so I’ll translate,” Ned said to the
class. “His name is—”
Ms. Moreno suddenly snorted
herself awake.
“Is everybody ready to talk about
Mars?” she asked. “There are so many
amazing facts about the planets!”
“NO, no, no!” Einstein cried. “It’s
MY turn to teach, not yours! Go back
to sleep! Let me get you a glass of
warm milk!”
“Ned,” Ms. Moreno said, “since you’re
up here, why don’t you share a few
facts about Mars? They might come
in handy on KIDS KNOW STUFF.”
Ned glanced over at Einstein. He had
never seen a hamster look so sad.
The planet Mars is home to something that
may sound like an alien but isn’t—the
mysterious dust devil. Similar to tornadoes,
dust devils are columns of wind that move
along the surface of a planet when the
ground gets warm. Earth has dust devils
too, but the ones on Mars can be up to
50 times as wide and 10 times as high
as dust devils here on Earth.
CHAPTER NINE
wHaT a
bUmMeR!
“Stop lying there like a lump. You’re
scaring me,” Marlon told Einstein.
But Einstein didn’t answer. Instead
he buried himself in the little cave
of shredded paper in his cage. He
gathered together a pile of food
to play with as he stared out into the
classroom.
Look at them, Einstein thought as
he watched the students. They’re so
lucky—learning new facts about the
world. And I was ALMOST the one
to teach them.
“Here comes someone to break up
the pity party,” Marlon said.
Einstein sat up with a start as
Principal Decker walked into the room
carrying Twinkl
es. He moved several
of Ms. Moreno’s plants and cleared a
space on the shelf for Twinkles’s tank.
When Twinkles slithered to the side
closest to Einstein, the hamster
buried himself deeper into his home-
made cave.
“Hello-o-o-o-o,” Twinkles hissed.
“You look like you need a hug.”
Einstein ignored the despicable
python.
“Just a little squeeze,” Twinkles
continued. “You’ll feel so much better.”
To Einstein’s surprise, Marlon piped
up from his plastic lagoon. “Leave him
alone,” Marlon said. “Einstein’s having
a bad day.”
Twinkles ignored the turtle.
“Just a teeny tiny hug,” Twinkles
said. “I guarantee it’ll help.”
From inside his cave, Einstein
peeked out at Twinkles. He had to
admit a hug DID sound good.
WAIT! What was he thinking?
Twinkles was trouble. Twinkles was
evil.
“Come on,” Marlon told Einstein.
“It’s only a matter of time before Ms.
Moreno falls asleep again. Maybe you
ARE the one to help them.”
Marlon was right. Enough moping.
Einstein had to help the class prepare.
“Are you sure?” Twinkles asked one
more time. “Just a little cuddle?”