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Text copyright © 2013 by Janet Tashjian
Illustrations copyright © 2013 by Jake Tashjian
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Tashjian, Janet.
Einstein the class hamster / Janet Tashjian ; illustrated by Jake Tashjian.
pages cm
Summary: Einstein, a very knowledgeable hamster, is desperate to
help the students in his classroom win an audition for a televised trivia
game show but, unfortunately, only one student, Ned, can hear him.
eISBN 978-1-62779-288-2
[1. Questions and answers—Fiction. 2. Hamsters—Fiction. 3. Schools—Fiction.
4. Children’s art.] I. Tashjian, Jake, illustrator. II. Title.
PZ7.T211135Ein 2013 [Fic]—dc23 2013018839
First Edition—2013 / Designed by April Ward
Printed in the United States of America by
R.R. Donnellley & Sons Company, Harrisonburg, Virginia
1 3 5 7 9 10 8 6 4 2
To John OvEr—
BeSt. teAcHeR. EvEr.
“I do not like to state an opinion on a
matter unless I know the precise facts.”
—ALBERT EINSTEIN
“Here’s a fact:
Someone needs to clean out my cage!”
—EINSTEIN THE CLASS HAMSTER
CHAPTER ONE
AnSwEr
ThAt
QuEsTiOn!
Hello, out there in television land!
Welcome to the number one show at
Boerring Elementary:
AnSwEr
ThAt
QuEsTiOn!
I’m your host, Einstein the class
hamster, and today we’ve got some
great contestants:
Ned
Ricky
Bonnie
Our contestants will be competing
for some amazing prizes. Tell them
what they can win, Marlon.
Not
this
again.
Sorry about that,
folks. Marlon’s a turtle,
so he’s a bit slow.
“Hey!”
Here’s what our contestants are
competing for today—a shiny new
pencil, a box of mints, and a SHETLAND
PONY! But first, the rules of the game.
I’ll be asking several questions, and
it’s up to our contestants and you in
the studio audience to find the correct
answer before our time is up. Let’s
start with a warm-up question. Ready?
What is the DEADLIEST ANIMAL on
the planet? Our contestants have ten
seconds to answer. Start thinking!
Come on, kids. Let’s get those
brains working!
Still nothing? Okay, here’s a hint:
This animal is deadlier than a shark,
a snake,
or even a lion.
Time’s up, folks!
The answer is the
MOSQUITO!
The mosquito may be small but it
can be deadly, in some areas spreading
malaria, which kills a million people a
year. That is one nasty insect!
We’ll be right back with more
questions after this word from our
sponsor. Stay tuned for lots of fun
and games on AnSwEr . . . thAt . . .
QuEStiON.
“NO . . . NOT AGAIN!” Einstein
shouted.
Okay,
students,
take out your
math books.
“Somebody stop
her!” Einstein said.
“That woman is ruining
my show!”
“We’ll start with the five table,”
Ms. Moreno continued. “All together—
5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40,
45, 50, 55, 60, 65, 70 . . .
THIS IS
MY AUDIENCE,
NOT YOURS!
WHY ARE YOU
DOING THIS?
“75, 80, 85, 90, 95, 100.”
“Bring out the hook! Get her out of
here!” Einstein yelled.
But Ms. Moreno couldn’t hear him.
Einstein put down his microphone
and settled into his cage.
“Take five, Marlon. On second
thought, take six. I now HATE the
number five.”
Ned made sure none of his classmates
were watching before he spoke to the
hamster. “Einstein, you realize you’re
the class pet and Ms. Moreno is the
teacher, right? That
SHE’S the one in charge
and you don’t really
have a game show?
That you keep yelling AnSwEr . . .
tHat...QuEStiON but no one
ever does? That I’m the only kid who
can actually HEAR you?”
“Details, details.” Einstein couldn’t
believe his show had been interrupted
by THAT WOMAN yet again. “Can I at
least do the Tasty Tidbits segment?”
Einstein asked.
Ned couldn’t help but smile. Nothing
made Einstein happier than learning
new, interesting facts, and Einstein’s
Tasty Tidbits was the part of the
show where he shared those fun
facts with his audience to help them
prepare for AnSwEr . . . thAt . . .
QuEStiON.
Einstein loved stumbling on a fun
fact more than he loved carrots or
kibbles or sunflower seeds, which is
why he named the
segment Tasty Tidbits.
Ned wasn’t too sure
about the whole
dressing up like the
fancy women who
worked on REAL TV
game shows, but it was Einstein’s
show, not his.
“Of COURSE you can do a Tasty
Tidbit,” Ned said. “Why do you think I
came over here?”
Einstein looked at Ms. Moreno in
the front of the class. She’s a no-
good ham, Einstein thought. Always
hogging the spotlight. But he was a
professional, and it was time to end
the show.
“You ready?” Ned asked.
When it came to Tasty Tidbits,
Einstein was born ready.
Believe it or not, the highest concentration
of mosquitoes on the planet is NOT in the
tropics but in the Arctic tundra. Because
it’s so flat, when the snow and ice melt, the
water has nowhere to go and forms shallow
pools that provide breeding grounds for
mosquitoes. When y
ou add in the constant
sunlight of summer as well as rising
temperatures, the pools of warm water
make perfect mosquito incubators.
BILLIONS can swarm in a day, filling the
skies—in the Arctic!
But don’t blame the males. Only female
mosquitoes bite because they need
protein from blood for their eggs.
(Regular mosquito diet consists of plant
sugar.) It’s not the mosquito’s bite that
makes you itch. It’s the body’s immune
response to the saliva she leaves behind.
CHAPTER TWO
a lItTlE BaCkGrOuNd
On eInStEiN
Einstein comes from a long line
of class hamsters.
His father,
Aristotle, was a
class hamster.
Knowledge is
power—at least
according to Sir
Francis Bacon.
His grandmother
Banjo was a class
There’s a typo
on page 29 of
your history
textbook.
Even his great-great-great-
grandfather Fuzzy was a class
hamster.
Dig that
groovy Venn
diagram,
man.
Because his family spent so much
time in classrooms, Einstein learned a
lot of facts most hamsters don’t know.
He knows the capitals of all fifty
states:
Montgomery, Alabama
Juneau, Alaska
Phoenix, Arizona
Little Rock, Arkansas
Sacramento, California
Denver, Colorado
Hartford, Connecticut
Dover, Delaware
Tallahassee, Florida
Atlanta, Georgia
Honolulu, Hawaii
Boise, Idaho
Springfield, Illinois
Indianapolis, Indiana
Des Moines, Iowa
Topeka, Kansas
Frankfort, Kentucky
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Augusta, Maine
Annapolis, Maryland
Boston, Massachusetts
Lansing, Michigan
St. Paul, Minnesota
Jackson, Mississippi
Jefferson City, Missouri
Helena, Montana
Lincoln, Nebraska
Carson City, Nevada
Concord, New Hampshire
Trenton, New Jersey
Santa Fe, New Mexico
Albany, New York
Raleigh, North Carolina
Bismarck, North Dakota
Columbus, Ohio
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Salem, Oregon
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Providence, Rhode Island
Columbia, South Carolina
Pierre, South Dakota
Nashville, Tennessee
Austin, Texas
Salt Lake City, Utah
Montpelier, Vermont
Richmond, Virginia
Olympia, Washington
Charleston, West Virginia
Madison, Wisconsin
Cheyenne, Wyoming
He loves to learn about history and
music.
He loves to make graphs and charts
with his food.
He loves helping kids learn about
math and science and geography.
Einstein based AnSwEr...thAt...
QuEStiON on all the study questions
his relatives had handed down through
the years. AnSwEr...thAt...
QuEStiON and Tasty Tidbits were
the perfect study guides. He was the
school’s most valuable resource. SO
WHY WEREN’T THEY USING HIM?
With all these interesting facts at
his hamster fingertips, Einstein didn’t
understand why Principal Decker
insisted on hiring HUMANS to teach
at Boerring Elementary when Einstein
could do a better job at a fraction
of the salary. (Fractions are also
something Einstein knows a lot about.)
Maybe THIS is the year Einstein
gets to make his beloved ancestors
proud.
The capital of Texas—AUSTIN—
rhymes with the capital of
Massachusetts—BOSTON.
I’m fixin’ to
make some
chowda!
CHAPTER THREE
SOmE BACkGrOuNd
ON NEd
one in Ms. Moreno’s class who could
hear Einstein. Maybe it was because
he had twelve animals of his own that
were taking over his house—
2 goldfish
1 golden retriever
3 chickens
1 ferret
3 cats
2 parakeets
Or maybe it was because when he
was a baby, Ned had tubes put in his
ears that affected his hearing in a
way doctors couldn’t explain.
Or maybe it was because Ned didn’t
have a lot of friends and Einstein was
the only one in class who seemed to
care about what Ned thought. Maybe
being such a sensitive kid had an
upside—like being able to understand
hamsters.
Whatever the reason, Ned liked
hanging out with Einstein. Watching
the hamster organize his notes for
AnSwEr . . . thAt . . . QuEStiON
was usually the highlight of Ned’s day.
Now all Ned had to do was make a
few human friends.
Ferrets are one of the most popular pets
in the United States. The word ferret
comes from the Latin word furonem,
which means “thief.” Ferrets ARE master
thieves, able to steal anything they can
grab, so they’re often trained to hunt
rabbits and other small
animals. But they’re only
master burglars when
they’re awake—ferrets
sleep more than
twenty hours a day.
CHAPTER FOUR
The
pRiNcIpAL
There was only one person Einstein
disliked more than Ms. Moreno, and
that was Principal Decker.
The main reason Einstein disliked
Principal Decker was that he didn’t
notice most of what went on in his
own school.
He didn’t notice the ivy covering
the front door that students had
to squeeze through on their way
to class every morning.
He didn’t notice Mr. Wright, the
janitor, playing poker with students
during recess.
He didn’t notice Ms.
Moreno spontaneously
dozing off several
times a day in her
classroom.
The school could be under
alien attack, and the principal
wouldn’t pay one bit of
attention.
Principal Decker only cared
about one thing—
Twinkles the python.
Twinkles was SUPPOSED to stay
in the Science Center, but Principal
Decker carried his tank around with
him all day. Sometimes he even wore
Twinkles around his neck like a scarf.
But Einstein had to give Twinkles
credit:
He didn’t just attempt to
gobble Einstein up; the snake was
creative in the ways he tried to
devour him.
“I’ve got something caught between
my teeth,” Twinkles would say. “Do
you think you could check it out?” As
if Einstein were some kind of rodent
dental floss.
“My uvula’s swollen,” Twinkles said
another time. “Would you mind giving
it a quick look?”
Einstein planned to stay as far away
from Twinkles as possible.
Pythons live in humid areas like Asia and
Africa. They average around fifteen feet in
length, but some types
have grown to be as long
as thirty-seven feet.
Pythons squeeze the
life out of their prey,
usually wild animals