Wanderings of French Ed, Page 4

audience the loving words of the song, each word pureand distinct. At times her voice was low and plaintive as ifpleading, emanating sadness to the listeners, then it rose until itsvolume filled the whole building; it was violently passionate for aninstant, and then again the words came with so much sadness that theyseemed to come from the shadow of death. It spoke of unsatisfied loveand despair, and the singer's voice was so true and fascinating, thatwhen the last words had been sung, many in the audience weresurprised to feel tears upon their face.

  Edward was so affected that he could not speak, while the Russian wassaying, "Jerusalem! What a voice!"

  The whole audience seemed mad, and flowers were thrown upon thestage, hats in the air, and they were calling for Nellie'sreappearance.

  When she came again, her face was pale, and her eyes wandered untilthey seemed to rest for an instant upon the box where Edward wassitting; then as a smile passed over her face, she sang in French oneof Albani's favorite songs. It is the song of an exile. It is full ofpathos, and tells of the longings of the exile for his far-away home.Once Edward bad heard the same song in Canada, sung by Albaniherself, but he had failed to be fully impressed by these lines:

  "Rendez-moi ma patrie Ou laissez-moi mourrir. Rendez-moi mon pays, Ou laissez-moi mourrir."

  After the play Edward was in such a state of mind that his friend wasactually unable to get a sensible answer from him, and, arrived attheir room, he wanted the Russian to stay up and speak of the womanwhom he now fairly adored; but Ben, while full of enthusiasm andadmiration for the same woman, was doing some hard thinking, and hecould not bring himself to believe that such a talented person couldbe so taken up with Edward, to be in real earnest in her actionstoward him. When Edward gave him a chance to speak, he said: "Edward,my boy, you have that woman on the brain, and I am fearful of theresults. In you she has found a source of diversion, and her actionsnow, I am afraid, are the result of a fancy which might pass away atany moment, and I advise you strongly not to let your enthusiasm runaway with your heart and common sense."

  "What? Do you mean to say that you believe that Nellie is notsincere?" asked Edward, turning pale.

  "I do not say that; but, Edward, she may be misleading herself. Sheis impulsive by nature, and you came in her life at the proper momentto allow her erratic imagination to create a romance with you as thehero; but you know that there is something else in life besidesromances and illusions."

  "True," answered Edward; "but this illusion, if illusion it is, isworth the reality to me, and every hour that it will last is worth ayear of the life I have lived heretofore."

  When they retired later, Edward could not sleep. He was in thatnervous state that increases the activity of the mind too much. Ashis excitement about Nellie began to subside, a faint picture of hisfirst sweetheart came to his mind. First, it was only like a passingglimpse; but it persisted in coming back, and after a while Edward'smind was impressed with a vivid image of Marie Louise. Every detailwas perfect. Her large blue eyes, so true and so innocent, were fullof a reproachful expression which brought sorrow to his soul, andthen the sad face would vanish and make place for Nellie's picture,whose large brown eyes never failed to set his brain on fire. Hissleep was only a continuation of these emotions, and in the morninghe was tired and nervous.

  After breakfast the Russian went to Dr. McNaughton's office, to makefinal arrangements about his position, while Edward sat in theirroom, trying to fathom the mysteries of the future. Getting tired ofthis inactivity, and knowing not what to do until the afternoon, whenhe was to call on Nellie, he decided to take a stroll and seesomething of the great western metropolis, that immense agglomerationof all nationalities, where men of all colors can be seen, but whereevery one seems to be in a hurry. People in Chicago seem to be alwayson the run; they rush along, knocking each other, sometimes they getjammed, and then they swear, but push their way, and on again theyrush. The millionaire and the gamin who blackens shoes rub elbows.The fakir who is always on the lookout for a victim, and stockbrokers go through the crowd side by side; the African, the Chinese,the Jap--in fact, representatives of almost every nation under thesun are seen in the great flood of humanity.

  Edward drifted aimlessly with the moving mass. No one paid theslightest attention to him, and he felt lost in that human sea. Hewas overcome by a sense of smallness which he had never felt before.The atmosphere was loaded with a dense fog, and his clothes were soonsaturated with a moisture that made him feel heavy. Once he gotcaught in a jam, and when he succeeded in extricating himself, he wasconsiderably bruised and scared, besides having lost his bearings: infact, he had to ask a policeman to direct him which way to go to findhis hotel, where, disgusted, he decided to go, feeling that he couldnever find any pleasure in living in Chicago.

  Arriving at the hotel he was handed two notes. One, from his friendBen, telling him that he was at work, and would not come to the hotelfor lunch; the other was from Nellie, asking him to come and havelunch with her. This invitation was to him like a ray of sunshinethrough a clouded sky. He went to his room and carefully made histoilet, his linen being all soiled from his morning's excursion.

  When he met Nellie at her home she was radiant and made him feel atonce that he was most welcome. The minute he looked into her eyes hefelt the same charm overcome his whole system, and all at once lifeagain was nothing but happiness.

  She spoke of the play and asked him if he had enjoyed the Frenchsong, "Rendez-moi ma patrie," and Edward told her that never in hislife had he enjoyed anything so much. Their lunch was a dainty one,served by a colored maid, and after drinking a small glass of finewine, Edward felt the most happy sensations tingling through hiswhole nervous system. All the poetry of which his nature was capablecame to the surface, and he was surprised himself at the way he couldspeak to Nellie. He spoke of his dreams when he left home, and shetold him that she would help him to realize them, and he believedevery word she said. The whole afternoon was spent in the mostdelightful tete-a-tete, and when darkness came, Edward was surprisedthat it was so late. Upon leaving her it was agreed that on themorrow they were to take up the question of his future life inChicago.

  After holding her hand in a caressing way, he bade her good-by, andthe next instant he knew that the charm had left him. He was seizedwith a chill, caused by the Michigan Lake breeze, and the delightfulintoxication of a moment ago gave way to the feeling of moroseunhappiness. He felt a great shame come over his soul when heremembered that he had sworn to Nellie that never in his life had heloved any one but her; again Marie Louise's image came to him, and hewalked to his hotel, carrying a great load of unhappiness and misery.At the hotel Benjamin was waiting for him, waiting with a satisfiedsmile upon his face, the very picture of contentment.

  "Well, Ed, everything is fixed. My work is not much, and I am given afree course in medicine. I attended the first lecture to-day, and Ican't tell how glad I am, my boy! How about you?" he asked.

  "Oh! I don't know yet--I may not remain in Chicago, Ben," answeredEdward, trying not to appear too discouraged.

  "Why? Can't she help you to get some employment, Ed?"

  "Will see to-morrow," answered Edward, going to his room, where hethrew himself upon the bed, and felt much like sobbing. His head uponhis hands, he remained in that position for a long while, thinkingover the situation. He did not have the fascinating presence of thatwonderful woman, Nellie, to brace him up, and the future seemed verydark indeed. Suppose she could not find him a position? What would hedo? His money was nearly all gone. He would not allow her to supporthim. His manhood revolted at that thought.

  If she did find him employment, he hated Chicago; he could certainlynot be satisfied in that city. His friend, the Russian, had aposition, but his salary was so small, that he knew he could notdepend on him for much help. He knew now that the happiness he sokeenly enjoyed when in the presence of Nellie was only momentary, andalways gave place to excessive depression afterward. His exalted ideaof honor compelled him to realize that his conduct was dishonorabletoward Marie Louise, to whom he had promised to remain faithful. Andwhat would his good and religious mother say if she knew that he wasin love with an actress? These thoughts were not conducive tohappiness or peace of mind, and Edward did not know what to do.

  The next morning Ben went to the clerk of the hotel and settled theirbill. Then he told Edward that he had found a good and cheapboarding-place, where they could both stop for less than one-halfwhat they were paying at the hotel. This change pleased Edward andkept him busy part of the forenoon, because he had to see to themoving of their baggage to the boarding-house, Ben being obliged togo to his duties.

  This new place was one of those many cheap boarding-houses patronizedmostly by poor students and clerks, and as it was in a back street,it was comparatively quiet, a fact that Edward noticed withsatisfaction. It was kept by an old,