Fitting In (Is Hard to Do) Semester 1, Page 3

AMBER’S MOTHER TELLS HER to go find, Cam’Ron. He was supposed to have been in the house. Better yet, he shouldn’t have been outside playing. After dinner, he was to take the trash to the dumpster and come right back. He never listens. Amber hoped she didn’t see anybody from school. Her mother had her out there looking for him and looking like a fool. She had on her pajama pants and headscarf. Amber wasn’t about to take it off and have to go through all that to put it back on again.

  Amber walked on the far side of the parking lot and held her head down because she saw Symphony Perkins with her cheerleading squad practicing in the parking lot. She sure didn’t want them to see her. Especially not looking like this. She wanted to look. Wished she could go over and join in but she was too shy to be somebody’s cheerleader. “Bring it on” was one of her favorite movies.

  Push ‘em back!

  Push ‘em back!

  Way Ba—

  Symphony grabs her purse she sat on top of some random person’s car and checked the time on her cell. It read 6:53pm. “Excuse me!” Her WestPoint squad stopped cheering as they directed their attention to a 180 pound, Spirit Sweet, approaching the line.

  “What?” Spirit said still chomping and picking meat from a bone.

  “What? I said to meet me out here at 6:00pm and you walking yo fat ass up here over an hour late that’s what!”

  “Girl, my bad… I had to eat first.”

  “Oh, really? What you eat?”

  “Girl, I had pork chops, mac & cheese, green beans, and cornbread! Oh, and washed it down with some cherry Kool-Aid!”

  Symphony walk up to Spirit, “Can I have some?”

  “Yeah, you can have it, it was my third piece, anyway.”

  Symphony took the pork chop and threw it as far and hard as she could. “All I heard you say was sugar, grease, and cheese!”

  ♥♥♥

  “Hey!” Amber stops some of her brother’s friend’s bike riding past her. “Have you guys seen Cam’Ron?”

  “Nope.”

  “All right. If you see him-”

  Laughter rang out from the group of boys as Amber’s head stung. “What was that?”

  The boy looks down at the piece of meat lying on the sidewalk. “Daaaaang! Is that a pork chop?” They all burst out laughing and pointing at Amber as they rode away. Amber kicks the stupid piece of meat into the parking lot and takes a shortcut walking through some of the houses hoping that Symphony and her friends weren’t having a field day at her expense like the little boys.

  ♥♥♥

  Spirit rolls her eyes at Symphony and smacks her lips. By now, the other girls were leaning on cars and sitting on the curb watching Symphony and Spirit. Symphony heard a few of them talking smack wondering how Spirit got on the team in the first place. Another girl answered because Symphony was team captain and Spirit was her friend. That may have been the case, but truth be told, Spirit can lift that 180 pounds into the air and do a mean Hercules and a split like nobody’s business. By now, they all had pissed Symphony off, so she told them to run two laps around the whole complexes.

  “Two laps! Do you know how big these complexes are?” Keyniesha asks. Symphony looks the girl up and down because she should have known better than to question her. They all take off running with mad looks on their faces.

  Symphony sits on the bench at the park because it’s the best spot to see the girls when they all pass around again without taking any short cuts. Even though Symphony has on her booty cut cheer shorts, she crosses her legs as she sits because that’s what a lady does.

  The part of the bench where Symphony sits lifts a little and startles her. She looks to her left, and it was Spirit sitting next to her. “Um, that definitely goes for you too!” Symphony looks Spirit up and down. “Especially you!”

  “I didn’t want to be on the team no way. Don’t forget you asked me.”

  Symphony lights a Newport and blows the smoke into the air. Spirit was annoying Symphony. Here she was trying to be a good friend and help Spirit lose some weight and have fun and she couldn’t even take it seriously.

  “How come you ain’t running? Better yet, why you always talk this healthy exercise stuff and you smoke like a chimney stack?”

  “Spirit, don’t start with me.” Symphony takes a puff and flicks the ashes onto the ground.

  “Girl! Can you believe Hunter is finally back?” Spirit perches her knee onto the bench and turns her body towards Symphony. She was getting too comfortable so Symphony knew Spirit was about to get into full gossip mode.

  “Yes, Spirit. I can believe it. I knew she was coming back because the only reason she left was to take care of her grandmother while she was on her sick bed.”

  “Yeah I know, but her mom… what’s up with that?” Spirit twists her lips. “Ain’t she a little too old to be having a baby?”

  Symphony backs away from Spirit and looks at her as if she was losing it. She must be having gossip withdrawal, trying to gossip about grown folks. I couldn't care less about anyone’s business who wasn’t in my age range. Symphony thought.

  “Go! Run! Now!” Symphony yells and points her in the direction she should be going.

  Jaylen, Quincy, and Roman walk up to where Symphony and Spirit were sitting. “C’mon bae, I’ll run with you.” Jaylen said. He and Roman were cousin who lived together with their grandmother. Spirit and Jaylen take off running very slow with stops in between before they even make it to the corner.

  “You swingin’ through right quick?” Roman asks Symphony. Symphony just looks at him, takes another puff from the cigarette, and hand it over to Quincy.

  “Maybe.”

  “What kind of answer is, maybe? Either you is or you ain’t.”

  “It’s my answer… take it or leave it.”

  Some girl walks through looking a hot mess. She has a scarf on her head and her face was screaming for concealer. “Hi, Symphony.” Symphony jerks back and look at the guys because she knows that girl didn’t just speak to her like she knew her. Symphony ignores the girl as if she never opened her mouth to say anything.

  Amber has been walking around looking for Cam’Ron for at least a good 15 minutes and backtracks to where she thinks he might be and goes through the yellow park to see if he’s there but instead she sees Symphony, Roman, and Quincy. She speaks to Symphony but guesses Symphony didn’t hear her because she didn’t say a word.

  “Ah, shoot! Look at Symphony makin’ new friends!” Quincy jokes and stomps out the cigarette butt on the ground.

  “Boy bye!” Symphony laughs, “I don’t even know her!”

  “Sym-phony!” Symphony turns to the sound of her mother’s voice. “Here, you have to watch her for a minute, I’ll be right back.” Melody, Symphony’s mother, releases Symphony’s hair from her ponytail and fidgets with it until she fluffs it out. “Appearances Symphony… appearances.”

  “No… I’m busy!” Symphony pushes her mother’s hand away and scoops her hair back into the ponytail.

  “It is not going to hurt you to watch your sister for a minute! You are not doing anything but talking to these little nappy-headed boys anyway!” Quincy laughs, grabs one of his baby dreads, and began to twist while Roman runs his palms across his waves.

  “No… I got something to do!”

  “Okay, that’s fine… remember that next time you want something!” Symphony’s mother takes Harmony to the swing and push her. “Weee! Higher, mommy higher!” Symphony hears Harmony say.

  Symphony directs her attention back to the guys. “I’ll be over after I have these girls finish their laps.” Roman smiles one of his biggest smiles because he knows what’s up.

  “Push me! Sym-phony! Push me!” Symphony looks over towards the swing and Harmony’s swing is at a standstill.

  “O, hell no!” Symphony looks around the park for her mother and she’s nowhere to be found. “Ooooo!” Symphony growls as she stomps over to the swings to push Harmony.

  “I guess there goes our plans, huh?” S
ymphony doesn’t answer she just keep pushing. “Ay, yo Q, man… you wanna babysit?”

  “Hell no! He ain’t watching my lil sister!”

  “I wasn’t goin’ do it noway!”

  “I know you wasn’t!” Harmony hops off the swing to run around the park with her friend.

  ♥♥♥

  Amber stops by Willow’s so she can walk around with her. Amber felt Willow always had to one-up her. There she was in her pajamas and Willow’s lounging in her, as she calls it, “house-shorts” with a red tank top with nothing but cleavage showing. Amber’s A-cups aren’t even big enough for all that. Willow’s hair is never out of place. Its long and bra strap length. She wears it parted on the side and only gets a perm if she’s tired of wearing it curly. Let her tell it, she’s not mixed with anything. Says it’s because she has Indian in her family. Don’t we all? Amber thought.

  At this point, Amber could not care less about where Cam’Ron is. She just wanted to walk back around and see if she can catch another glimpse of Roman. She didn’t want him to see her though.

  “So anyway…” Amber begins. “We need to talk to Sis. Jackie and see if we can start doing some praise dances to Kirk Franklin’s joints.

  “Geesh, Amber.” Willow rolls her eyes.

  “What?”

  “Don’t say joint and you talking about church and gospel.”

  Amber sucks her teeth, “Willow please! It ain’t like I was talking about weed.”

  “Yeah, but still…” Amber waves her off because Willow’s talking foolishness. “Ms. Jackie is going to say no because the Mothers of the church thinks it’s too worldly.

  “That’s stupid! Kirk Franklin is Gospel!” Amber says as Willow shrugs her shoulders as if saying, O’ well.

  Amber tries to change the subject. “I saw Symphony’em practicing in the parking lot.”

  “So… she always be out there practicing.”

  “So, I’m just saying don’t you ever wish we were cheerleaders or a part of something big and important?”

  “We are! The marching band is important.” Willow scrunches her eyebrows together as if Amber was stupid for not thinking like her. “We entertain just like the cheerleaders and football players.”

  “Willow, please! I ain’t never hear nobody giving props to the band! Well maybe, Billy, because he plays the drums. But ain’t nobody ever came up to me and pat me on the back and tell me I played the mess out of that flute! Have they with your saxophone?”

  “No… and I don’t care!” Willow laughs a little and continues. “I don’t play my sax for no one but me. I don’t need nobody’s pats on the backs or good jobs! I carry enough of them within myself.”

  ♥♥♥

  Symphony kept eyeing a black car that sat across the opposite side of the street. The windows were illegally tinted black so she couldn’t see who was inside. At first, she didn’t pay it too much attention because she thought maybe they were going to the mailboxes. Who just sits there at a little kid park and watch? All kinds of bells and whistles went off in Symphony’s head. “Harmony!” Symphony calls to her sister. “Let’s go!” This car was giving Symphony the creeps.

  “Why you leaving?” Roman grabs Symphony’s hand.

  “Because, it’s about to get dark.” The girls were coming around from their first lap and had another round to go.

  “Y’all know whose car that is?” Quincy and Roman turn around to see which car Symphony was referring to.

  “What car?” They both ask.

  “The black one rig— never mind.” The car had snuck off without Symphony even knowing.

  “Dude, you ‘noided.”

  “Do I look like a dude to you?” Symphony gets closer in Quincy’s face.

  The girls were closer now and trying to run pass Symphony huffing and puffing. “Stop! What kind of fool y’all take me for?” They all looked at Symphony as if they didn’t understand the question. “I know the complexes are huge but I also know it doesn’t take this long to run around it, so y’all had to be walking and goofing off! Ya know what? Go home! We will pick it up again tomorrow.”

  ♥♥♥

  After Amber and Willow go to the black park which is on the other side of the complex, Amber’s giving up because she sees her twin nightmares, Ta’Keyla and Tanga’Rae, and decide that her search is over. She turns around faster than her heart was beating before they saw her. Too late.

  “Ugh! I know this ugly ass biatch ain’t walk over here to our park.”

  “Just keep walking, Amber.” Willow says to her as if Amber is stupid enough to stop. Amber wondered why the twins only pick on her all the time and not Willow.

  Amber keeps walking and ignores them. Like her mom says, be the bigger person and walk away. It seems that’s all Amber was good at. Cam’Ron however is a different story. He ain’t scared of nothing or nobody. Amber thinks he just may be a bully like the twins here following them.

  The way their complex were set up, it was like three different ones in one. Up on the hill, sat the big condominiums, those were the expensive ones. They had a parking lot even though the condominiums had garages attached to them. Of course, that’s where Willow stayed… Ryder and Symphony. Then you have the middle complexes. They were made up of ranch style houses and apartments. These looked like a regular neighborhood, a street in the middle, and houses or apartments on each side. That’s where Amber stayed, Roman and Hunter. Then you have the bottom… that’s where the projects are… where Amber and Willow were right now. They were located at the bottom of the hill. Hence the nickname, “The Bottom.” Some of the ranch styled apartment’s backyards were where the projects began. So basically, it was one way in and one way out. Quincy stays there along with the twins and Spirit. Amber wasn’t exactly sure where any of them really lived because all the apartments looked alike and were so close together.

  “We know you hear us! Ugly bumpy-face biatch!

  Ta’Keyla runs up and pushes Amber so hard her head jerks back making her feel as though she might have whiplash. Amber turns around and Tanga’Rae punches Amber right below the eye… right on her cheekbone! Amber sees stars and flashes of light. Then the pain radiates down the side of her face. But them stars ain’t the only thing Amber sees. She sees two against one and Willow’s back as she high-tails it back up the hill.

  “Dafuq off my sister!” Cam’Ron finally shows up and pushes Tanga’Rae to the ground and now Ta’Keyla’s in his face.

  “Oh, I know you ain’t just put yo hands on no girl!” Ta’Keyla points her long skinny finger in Cam’Ron’s face.

  “Yo! You aight?” Amber’s stunned. In shock. And embarrassed at the same time. Roman looks at Cam’Ron and gives him a head nod while looking at Amber for a response.

  “Wait ‘till I tell my brothers… they goin’ whoop dat ass!” Tanga’Rae dusts herself off.

  “Man, goin’ with all that!” Roman interjects.

  “I know you ain’t talkin’ if you don’t hur-rup they goin’ get you too!”

  Amber had no idea what they meant by that. As much as she wanted to be right there in Roman’s presence, her cheek was killing her and so was her ego. Amber’s cheek felt like it was the size of an orange sitting on her face. She could see it too well from the corner of her left eye. Obviously it was noticeable because Roman looked at it and said, “Yeah, you goin’ need to put some ice on that.”

  “We got it…” Cam’Ron seemed to have an attitude and Amber and Roman had no idea why. Cam’Ron pulls Amber along as if he was the big brother and she was the little sister.

  4 CHAPTER FOUR

  SYMPHONY PERKINS

  But First Let Me Take A Selfie