Better Off Friends

  For Erin Black, Sheila Marie Everett, and Elizabeth Parisi because this author is better off having you in her corner

  CONTENTS

  TITLE PAGE

  DEDICATION

  CHAPTER ONE

  CHAPTER TWO

  CHAPTER THREE

  CHAPTER FOUR

  CHAPTER FIVE

  CHAPTER SIX

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  CHAPTER NINE

  CHAPTER TEN

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  ALSO BY ELIZABETH EULBERG

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  COPYRIGHT

  Guys and girls can be friends.

  Way to get right to the point, Levi.

  All I’m saying is that it’s possible for guys and girls to be friends. I’ve never understood what the big deal is. I mean, yeah, we’ve had to deal with all those stupid questions.

  Oh, the questions.

  Are you guys together?

  Why not?

  You’ve hooked up at some point, right?

  Or thought of it?

  Macallan, how could you resist Levi’s considerable charms?

  That has never happened.

  I don’t know….

  Well, I do. And it’s never happened. Ever.

  Okay, fine. But I’ll admit it hasn’t been totally easy. We’ve had some problems.

  Some problems?

  All right, more than a few. But look how everything turned out. I don’t think either of us thought we’d even speak to each other again after my first day at school, back in seventh grade. Especially since you must’ve had a huge crush on me.

  Are you remembering the same day that I am?

  Yes.

  Oh. I’m so sorry. I believe you’re suffering from delusional fantasies.

  I’m not delusional. There are many words to describe me: awesome, stud, male extraordinaire, you name it.

  Fine. You’re awesome. But clearly delusional.

  I was probably the first kid ever excited for summer to be over. There was too much free time that summer, which can lead to too much thinking, especially for a loss-stricken eleven-year-old. I couldn’t wait for seventh grade to start. To dive into schoolwork. To distract myself from the loneliest facts. At one point, I regretted turning down Dad’s offer to spend the summer in Ireland with Mom’s family. But I knew that if I went, there would be reminders of her everywhere. Not like there wasn’t one every time I looked in the mirror.

  So the only escape I had was school. When I got the message that I was to report to the main office before class, I was worried I’d be faced with another year of forced visits with the school counselor, looks of pity from my fellow classmates, and well-meaning but oblivious faculty members who kept telling me it was “important to keep her memory alive.”

  Like I could ever forget her.

  I wasn’t ready for any additional drama that morning. It was already the first day of a new school year since.

  “Do you want me to go with you, Macallan?” Emily asked after I received my summons to the office. A tight smile on her face gave away the concern she thought she was hiding.

  “No, it’s okay,” I replied. “I’m sure it’s nothing.”

  She studied me for a second before adjusting my hair clip. “Well, if you need me, I’ll be in Mr. Nelson’s class.”

  I gave her a reassuring smile and kept it on my face as I entered the office.

  Principal Blaska greeted me with a hug. “Welcome back, Macallan! How was your summer?”

  “Great!” I lied.

  We both stared at each other, neither knowing what to say next.

  “Well, I’m going to need your assistance today with a new student. Meet Levi Rodgers — he’s from Los Angeles!”

  I looked over and saw this boy with long blond hair pulled into a low ponytail. His hair was even longer than mine. He tucked a loose strand behind his ear before he reached out his hand and said, “Hey.”

  I had to give him credit — at least he had manners … for a surfer dude.

  Principal Blaska handed me his schedule. “Could you show him around and take him to his first class?”

  “Of course.”

  I led Levi out into the hallway and started giving him the five-cent tour. I wasn’t in the mood to play What’s Your Life Story?

  “The building is basically in the shape of a T. Down this hallway you have your math, science, and history classes.” I started motioning my arms like a flight attendant. “Then behind you, English and language classes as well as study hall.” I started walking fast. “And there’s the gym, cafeteria, and music and art rooms. Oh, and there are bathrooms at the end of each hall as well as a bubbler.”

  His eyebrows shot up. “What’s a bubbler?”

  My immediate reaction was one of disbelief. How could he not know what a bubbler is?

  “Um, where you can get water. To drink.” I walked him over to it and turned the handle for the water to come out of the spout.

  “Oh, you mean a water fountain.”

  “Yes. Water fountain, bubbler — whatever.”

  He laughed. “I’ve never heard it called a bubbler before.”

  My response was to walk faster.

  As his eyes swept the hallway, I noticed they were light blue, almost gray. “It’s so weird,” he went on. “You could fit this entire school in my old school’s cafeteria.” His voice went up at the end of everything he said, like it was a question. “It’s, like, going to be a lot to adjust to, ya know?”

  I knew this was supposed to be the point where I politely asked him about his old school, but I wanted to get to class as soon as possible.

  A few friends passed by to say hello, everyone checking out the new guy. Our school was fairly small; the majority of us had been together since fifth grade, if not kindergarten.

  I stole another glance at him. It was hard to decipher if he was cute. His hair was practically white in places, probably from the sun. His tan made his light hair and pale eyes stick out even more — but this wouldn’t be for very long, since in Wisconsin we rarely see the sun past August.

  Levi had on a checkered button-down paired with long cargo shorts and flip-flops. It was as if he couldn’t decide whether to dress up or be casual. I luckily had Emily to help me pick out my first-day-of-school outfit that day: a bright-yellow-and-white-striped sundress with a white cardigan.

  Levi gave me an eager smile. “So what kind of name is Macallan? Or is it McKayla?”

  My initial instinct was to ask him if the name Levi came from the jeans his mom was wearing on the day he was born, but instead I behaved like the good, responsible student I was supposed to be.

  “It’s a family name,” I said. Which wasn’t a total lie — it was someone’s family name, just not mine. While I loved that I had a unique name, it was always a little embarrassing to admit it was because my dad liked a certain kind of Scotch whiskey. “It’s Ma-cal-lan.”

  “Dude, that’s cool.”

  I couldn’t believe he’d just called me dude.

  “Yeah, thanks.” I finished the tour at his first class, English. “Well, here you are.”

  He looked at me expectantly, like I was supposed to find him a desk and tuck him in good night.

  “Hi, Macallan!” Mr. Driver greeted me. “I didn’t think I had you until later today. Oh, wait, you must be Levi.”

  “Yes, I’m showing him around. Well” — I turned to Levi — “I’ve got to catch class. Good lu
ck.”

  “Oh, okay,” he stammered. “See ya around?”

  It was at that moment I realized the look he had was fear. He was scared. Of course he was. I felt a pang of guilt but quickly shook it off as I walked to my first class.

  I had enough problems as it was.

  Emily got down to business the second we were in line at lunch that day.

  “So what’s the deal with the new guy?” she asked.

  I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know. He’s okay.”

  She examined a slice of pizza. “His hair is so long.”

  “He’s from California,” I offered.

  “What else do you know about him?” She discarded the pizza and picked up a chicken sandwich and salad. I followed suit.

  I was so thankful that I had a girly-girl friend like Emily. My dad, as much as he tried, couldn’t really help me out with things like hair, clothes, and makeup. If left to his own devices, I’d wear jeans, sneakers, and a Green Bay Packers T-shirt every day, and eat pizza for every meal. And Emily was as girly as you could get. She was easily one of the prettiest girls in our class, with long, shiny jet-black hair, and dark brown eyes. She also had the best clothes, and I was so glad we were the same size so I could borrow them, although she was already way more developed than I was. At least I would have someone to go to once I needed a bra. I couldn’t even imagine how awkward that would be for Dad. For both of us.

  “Um …” I tried to think about what else I learned about Levi. Now, too late, I felt I should’ve made more of an effort.

  Danielle joined us, her honey-colored curls bouncing along as we walked into the cafeteria. “Is that the new guy?” She pointed to Levi, who was sitting by himself.

  “He’s so skinny,” Emily remarked.

  Danielle laughed. “I know, right? But don’t worry, if the ButterBurgers don’t fatten him up, the cheese curds and brats will.”

  The three of us started walking to our regular table. Levi’s gaze followed us. We were used to this. Usually people liked to make little comments like “a blonde, a redhead, and an Asian walked into a …” But I always saw us as “the one you want to sit next to because she’s hilarious, the one you want to cheat off of in class, and the one all the guys have a crush on.”

  I gave Levi a quick smile, hoping to undo some of the rudeness from the morning. He returned with a sad wave. I paused for a second, and in that second, I noticed the look of gratitude on Levi’s face. He was expecting me to sit with him or at least invite him over. I hesitated, unsure what to do. I didn’t want to play babysitter, but I also knew what it was like to be alone. And scared.

  “Guys, I feel bad. Can he sit with us?”

  When nobody argued, I approached Levi.

  “Hey there — how was your morning?” I asked, trying to smile and be welcoming for a change.

  “It was good.” The tone in his voice indicated that it was anything but good.

  “Do you want to sit with us?” I gestured to our table.

  “Thanks.” He exhaled deeply.

  Soon the attention turned toward gossip of the I Really Know How You Spent Your Summer Vacation kind.

  Levi sat next to me and picked at his lunch uncomfortably. He put his backpack on the table and I noticed a button pinned onto it.

  “That’s not —” I stopped myself. What were the chances it was what I thought it was? It’d be way too random.

  Levi noticed I was looking at the KEEP CALM AND BLIMEY ON button on his bag. “Oh, there’s this totally rad BBC show —” he started to explain.

  I could barely contain my excitement. “Buggy and Floyd. I love that show!”

  His face lit up. “No way — nobody knows Buggy and Floyd. This is insane!”

  It was insane.

  Buggy and Floyd followed the zany antics of Theodore “Buggy” Bugsy and his cousin/roommate Floyd. In pretty much every episode, Buggy got himself into some ludicrous trouble that Floyd had to rescue him from. And Floyd was always complaining about the situation, Buggy, and pretty much everything about society.

  I felt a smile start to spread across my lips. “Yeah, my mom’s family lives in Ireland and I saw it when I visited them a couple summers ago. I have the DVDs at home.”

  “Me too! My buddy’s dad is head of development for a production company and he was thinking about adapting it for here.”

  I groaned. I hated it when a perfectly awesome show from the UK got changed for the US. Sometimes British humor did not translate and it would end up dumbed down.

  “They’d totally ruin it,” Levi and I said in unison. Both of us were surprised for a second before we started laughing.

  “Favorite episode?” He was leaning forward, his shoulders no longer up toward his ears.

  “Oh, there are so many. The one where Floyd’s sister is about to give birth —”

  “Blimey if I know where to get boiling water unless a cuppa tea counts.” Levi’s cockney accent was spot-on.

  “Yes!” I slammed my hand against the tabletop.

  “What’s going on over there?” Emily looked inquisitively at both of us.

  “You know that British show I’ve tried to get you to watch?”

  “That?” Emily shook her head at me like she always did when she found my little eccentricities amusing. She turned toward Levi. “You know about that?”

  He laughed. “Yeah, it’s so funny.”

  “Uh-huh.” Emily wrinkled her nose. “It’s adorable that you have that in common.”

  “Common!” Levi crowed. “I know I ain’t the queen o’ England, but I ain’t common.”

  This was another line from the show.

  “A common nuisance, you are!” we both finished.

  Emily looked at us like were aliens. Danielle seemed amused.

  We talked a little more about our summers, and when it was time to go, I made sure Levi knew where he was going next. This time when he said, “See ya later,” I found myself not dreading the idea. It was pretty cool to have someone around here who didn’t like the same things as everybody else.

  Emily laughed as we put our trays on the conveyer belt. “So you and your new boyfriend seem to have a lot to talk about.”

  “Stop it! You know he’s not my boyfriend.”

  “I know that, but everybody else in the cafeteria seemed to notice your little lovefest.”

  She was probably right. People were most likely making comments about our overanimated conversation. But I really didn’t care. It would be a welcome change from everything else people had whispered behind my back over the past year.

  Uncle Adam was waiting for me after school to take me home. He was always excited to see me, even if he’d dropped me off only a few hours ago.

  “How was your first day?” he asked while his arms wrapped tightly around me.

  “Good!” I reassured him.

  “All right.” He grabbed my backpack and started walking me to his car.

  Levi was getting into an SUV with a woman I assumed was his mom. He said something to her and she started to walk over to us. With some reluctance, he followed. A knot began to form tightly in my stomach. I always got defensive whenever anybody met Adam for the first time.

  Uncle Adam is an amazing person and everybody in town loves him. He’s friendly, outgoing, always willing to lend a hand. But he was born with a speech deformity, so when he talks, his speech sounds a little slurred. I’m not exactly sure what it’s called, but the back of his throat doesn’t close properly, so it can be difficult to understand him sometimes.

  When I was little and I asked what was wrong with Uncle Adam, Mom made it clear that there was nothing “wrong” with him, he spoke differently because of a birth defect. So I took it at face value. Then, two years ago, I was walking home from the park when these boys started asking how my “retard uncle” was doing. I yelled, “He’s not retarded, he just talks funny.” I came home in tears and told my dad what had happened. That’s when he informed me that Adam was develop
mentally disabled. My parents thought I already knew. But what did I know? He drives, has a job, and lives in his own house (right across the street from ours). His life isn’t really that different from ours.

  I held my breath as she introduced herself to Adam and me, worried that, like some other people, she’d do something wrong. “Hi, Macallan, I’m Levi’s mother. Thank you so much for being welcoming to Levi today. It’s hard to move halfway across the country and start fresh at a new school.” She had the same long blond hair as Levi, but hers was pulled back into a high ponytail. She had on yoga pants and a hoodie. It looked like she was coming back from the gym. Even without makeup on, she was absolutely gorgeous.

  “Mom,” Levi groaned, no doubt trying to prevent her from telling his whole life story.

  She turned toward Adam. “And you must be her father.”

  Uncle Adam grabbed her hand, and I saw her flinch slightly at his grip. “Uncle.”

  “This is my uncle Adam,” I said.

  “Very nice to meet you.” She gave him a warm smile as he and Levi shook hands, too. I tried to find some hesitation on Levi’s part, but it wasn’t there. He was probably more focused on getting his mom back to the car.

  I found myself nervously overexplaining. “Yeah, my dad sometimes has to work late even though he owns his own construction company, so sometimes Adam leaves the hardware store to take me home.”

  “Well, if you ever need us to take you home or stay with us until your dad or uncle is done, we’d be more than happy to have you.”

  I stood there silently for a few seconds. I was used to Midwestern politeness, but here was a woman who’d just moved to town and I’d just met, and she was already offering her home to me. And she was doing it out of niceness, not because she knew about the accident.

  “Great! Wednesdays are always hard,” Uncle Adam said before I could stop him. He usually worked from seven in the morning until two, so he could pick me up from school. Except on Wednesdays, when he had the late shift. Last year, I either stayed in the library or got a ride with Emily or Danielle after their respective after-school activities.