Hoist the Jolly Lucas, Page 2

  Anyway, I've decided that I'll always have a foil-pack nearby in case I ever go crazy with love again. She was right about irresistible urges being irresistible, so I learned a lesson, I suppose. I didn't appreciate the Been there, done that comment when she claimed to have had them too. I told her that I definitely was not going to have sex until I was married. Then she did it again. Been there, done that. Why would I care what an old housewife did or didn't do when she was young?

  Yollie had warned me that Yolanda would meddle. She said that I should take the bad with the good. She's right, I suppose. Other than last night, Yolanda has always been very nice to me. But I wish that she hadn't pretended to be something that she wasn't. She doesn't have the faintest idea what I'm going through. How could she? She hasn't been in a war where she could die if she made a single mistake.

  # # # # # # # #

  The planning meeting went well. Yolanda didn't give me any dirty looks and actually talked to me like everything was normal. Yollie was a pain in the butt though; acting giddy the whole time. She calmed down after I reviewed what TG had told us about the new brain-bands. Zzyk was going to have control of everything Albertans did, said, and thought. I had been thinking that we could gradually take brain-bands away from Albertans and replace them with fake bands. That plan won't work if Zzyk installs those new bands. When I asked if anyone had any ideas other than installing fake bands, Hank suggested that our focus should be on stopping Zzyk from installing the new ones. Nobody had any ideas on how to do that. We eventually struck a committee to come up with some options. Will, Wolf and I are on it.

  We also talked about what Zzyk's response to our victory would be. Everyone agreed that he'd attack us somehow, but we couldn't imagine how. Whatever he does, it's going to be nasty. I can smell it.

  Hank handed me an unsealed envelope at the end of the meeting. "Some ideas about how we can punish Zzyk for intruding into B.C. space and help ourselves in the process," he said. "Show it to the man in the gray suit. I'll add details if he likes the potential."

  I said I would, of course. But after reading the note inside, I couldn't make much sense of it. Leverage through intrusions of prison towers and value of the steel; threaten second transmitter Mount Assiniboine; threaten helping Albertans find long-lost relatives. Ask cash; settle land. I'll show it to Franklin Franklin. Perhaps, he'll know what Hank was suggesting.

  I noticed a little interchange between Yolanda and Yollie as we were leaving the ship's main deck. Yollie was brushing by Yolanda and, while doing so, she grabbed her hand and slipped something into it. Yolanda looked down and popped it into her pocket, but I saw a corner of what Yollie gave her. It was a foil packet like what Yolanda had forced on me. I knew that Yollie had been instructed to carry those around with her too. But why would Yollie be giving a foil packet to her mom? She has her own stash in the root cellar. No way that Yolanda would run out of her packets this year, or even the next. Then TG was telling me that he could find out where the new brain-bands were being manufactured. I asked him to join the committee and I forgot all about Yollie.

 

  Back to the Table of Contents

  Chapter 5

  From Izzy's journals: Saturday, September 3.

  I dropped into the compound the next day, thinking that I'd grab TG and perhaps fly-over Prudhoe Bay to see if anything up there had changed. The compound was mostly deserted but I found Winnie and Liset playing in the living room. Winnie was building wooden block towers and Liset was knocking them down and laughing.

  "Where's everyone, Winnie?" I asked.

  "Down at the Henderson's. TG and Liset are going to move into their place. I'm babysitting for another 20 minutes and then I have to peel carrots and cut up carrot sticks for Liset."

  I waved good-bye and wandered over to the square of log houses. I didn't know which one was the Henderson's, but figured I'd hear voices. The neighbour families were all on holidays – otherwise they would have been invited to our Assassination Day party. I saw Yolanda and Yollie through a window and paused. They were hugging. Yolanda was caressing Yollie's left cheek and then, she pulled Yollie's face to her and kissed her right cheek. I had never seen her do that before; had thought that Yollie was having a melt down because their hug was so tight. Both were smiling; obviously not a melt-down.

  I sauntered noisily through the front door. "Anyone here?"

  "In the kitchen, Izzy." Yolanda's voice.

  By the time I got there, Yollie and Yolanda were on opposite sides of the room. Feeling guilty about hugging? "Winnie said that TG and Liset are moving in here?"

  "The Hendersons are not coming back," Yolanda replied. "TG needs his own house and the Aboriginal Nation agreed that he should take over this one. Hank and TG are going through the house and making a list of things they're going to need."

  I had noticed the living room when I came in. Two nice cushiony sofas, even a black leather recliner. A glass topped coffee table on a blue wooly area rug and pictures of mountains on the wall. The kitchen had a table with four chairs, some yellow place mats on the table and painted plywood counters (in yellow) with big Mason jar canisters. Based on what I saw here, the bedrooms downstairs probably had real beds, closets with doors, and even some bureaus for clothes. This was an impressive home! "Place looks full of stuff," I said.

  "The Hendersons took their personal possessions and are going to guard the border further north. They left the Nation's furniture behind. Their children were long gone so there's nothing here now that's suitable for a 2-year old."

  "Thought I'd grab TG and fly up to Prudhoe for a look-see."

  "His schedule is full for the next couple of days, Izzy. He and Hank will be visiting some thrift stores, plus he has to spend a ton of time with Liset so that she'll start to accept him as a parent. Right now, she's only comfortable around Winnie. Perhaps you could try Wolf?"

  "I'll check," I said, but I already knew that I wouldn't. I don't like being bossed around. If I had wanted to go up with Wolf, I would have found Wolf. There was an uncomfortable moment where nobody had anything to say. Y&Y were looking at me. Waiting for me to leave? "OK, see ya." And I left but peeked through the window on my way back. Y&Y were back in a hug. Yolanda with her left hand touching Yollie's cheek; another kiss on the right. The two of them were whispering? Either Yolanda has had a new personality implant or I'm missing something here; went back to the compound. Winnie will know what's going on.

  # # # # # # # #

  I found Winnie still sitting on the floor but Liset was wandering around the living room, touching things. Yolanda's living room seemed empty now. All of her glass vases were gone as were the framed pictures of the kids. Breakables. They'd be hidden some place that Liset couldn't reach. "What'cha doing?"

  "Waiting for Liset to decide what she wants to play with next."

  "Who's taking over the babysitting after your turn," I asked.

  "I dunno. The schedule is on the fridge."

  I wandered into the kitchen. I had figured there'd be a schedule. I didn't expect two. One for Liset; the other for TG. The next three days were all blocked off into 30-minute segments. Yolanda had identified who was babysitting Liset in each interval and, as well, what TG would be doing during this time. I saw the trend – he'd be gradually increasing the time that he'd be spending with Liset. But today, he was scheduled to be with Hank through to 4 p.m. After that, he was with Liset until her bedtime. Tomorrow he was heavily booked with Yolanda, but assigned to Liset for all the meals. Plus he'd be with her for bedtime. I saw Yollie's name sprinkled liberally throughout the three days; noticed that she had babysitting duty first thing every morning starting at 6 a.m. TG didn't become involved until it was time for Liset's breakfast. Hmmmm. Yollie's kind of old for a sleep-over party, isn't she?

  That foil packet that Yollie slipped into Yolanda's hand yesterday? I figured that it was empty and Yollie wanted Yolanda to know that it was empty. I'm guessing that Yollie is going to be spending a
lot of time at TG's house from now on.

  Back to the living room. Winnie was on the sofa with Liset on her lap. They were looking at an old-fashioned cloth book for toddlers. A wooden crate of cloth books was at Winnie's feet. It was true. Hank never does throw anything out. I sat down next to Winnie.

  "These used to be mine. I still remember them," she smiled as I leaned over to see the illustrations. "Liset, do you remember Aunt Izzy? Can you say Aunt Izzy?"

  "Aunt Izzy?"

  "Mom says that children have to learn to address their elders properly."

  "I'm not an elder."

  "Sure you are. You're way older than she is. Do you want to read a book to her? Liset likes hearing the stories and seeing the pictures."

  "Sure, I guess."

  "Mom says that we should read to Liset a lot so that she'll enjoy being around books. Then she'll want to learn to read for herself. You should grab a book, sit down next to us, and pretend to read it to yourself. "

  I did and it worked. Liset started to look over at what I was doing. Winnie slid her own book out of sight.

  "Liset, do you want to sit on Aunt Izzy's lap? She'll read the story to you." Winnie mimed me holding out my hands to lift Liset off Winnie's lap. I did that. Liset shrunk back into Winnie's body and looked at me in fear.

  "Too soon," Winnie concluded. "Mom says that children will be frightened of strangers at this age. She's not frightened of me because I'm not that much bigger than her. We have to get her used to Uncle TG as quickly as we can, Mom says, because she has to see him as her parent. She hasn't had a real parent yet."

  Liset was still watching me closely. I moved away from Winnie. Liset relaxed and started digging for the book that Winnie had slid behind the cushion. "I see that Yollie is going to help TG out too," I said.

  "Mom says that taking care of babies is a full time job. One person can do it, but Mom says it will be exhausting. Yollie volunteered to help. I did too. But Mom says that they can't use me too much or Liset won't bond with an adult. When Liset starts going to Uncle TG when she's crying, we'll know that she has bonded."

  "Yolanda told you all this?"

  I saw Winnie hesitate.

  "Sort of," she said.

  "What does sort of mean?"

  "I heard her say these things to Uncle TG. Mom says that she has to give him a crash course in raising babies because he has to start being her father as soon as he can. Tomorrow Mom is going to tell her as much as she can about raising babies."

  "Does your mom know that you've been listening to her conversations with TG?"

  "Well, I'm in the same room."

  "Are you hiding in the room, Winnie?"

  "Sort of."

  "Are you invisible in your sling in the room?"

  Winnie nodded.

  "You should ask your mom if you could listen in, don't you think?"

  Winnie shook her head. "She'd say, No."

  "So perhaps you shouldn't listen in?"

  "But I want to listen to them talk about raising babies. And Mom hasn't said that I can't, so I'm not breaking any rule."

  "Well..."

  "You're not my mom. You can't tell me what to do. I'm not breaking any rules so I'm going to do what I want to do." With that, Winnie hauled Liset up to her shoulder and stomped away while Liset struggled and twisted to get down. She turned at the corridor to her bedroom and glared at me. "I don't like you any more," she said and disappeared.

  Wonderful. Nobody wanted me around. On top of that, Yollie is having sex when she's not supposed to. For her punishment, she gets kisses from Yolanda and a luxurious furnished house to live in. When I even think about having sex, Yolanda throws me into a root cellar prison and yells at me. What's wrong with this picture?

  # # # # # # # #

  It was turning out to be a great morning; figured I'd be welcome at Doc's. He and Granny were sharing duty on the Wilizy. I glanced at Yolanda's crew schedule that was posted on the fridge as I went by. They'd be here until noon. Then Yollie would take over. Last thing I wanted was to hear her bragging about her sex life, so I had to be out of here by noon.

  "It's me," I said. Saw Doc in the living room and plopped down next to him. Granny was hunched over some papers on the galley table, but when she saw me sit down, she joined us. Doc closed his whittling knife and put it into his shirt pocket; whisked some shreds of wood off his lap and onto the deck. "What's up?"

  "Nothing much. Thought I'd do some dancing. What'cha doing?"

  "Granny's working on her next child rearing lesson and I'm littering the deck. It's a tough job, but somebody has to do it."

  Something in how he said it wasn't right. Like it was another Doc talking. There was an uncomfortable silence – Doc not being his usual chatty self. "Winnie doesn't like me any more," I blurted. Then I had to tell them the whole story about her listening in.

  Granny explained. "Usually Winnie is obedient, but she also has a mind of her own and she has a stubborn streak. She listens in because she wants to be part of the family, but she often is excluded because she's the youngest. That's why she sneaks her way into rooms. Sometimes Yolanda will catch her when she should be in bed or when she shouldn't be listening. Most of the time, Yolanda pretends to be tricked. It's tough being the youngest in a large family. Winnie will like you again by this afternoon."

  I nodded my head. It made sense, I guess. Looked up to see Doc and Granny both looking at me, hands in their laps, smiling gently.

  "Yollie's had sex with TG and she's going to be living with him. Sleeping with him too."

  "Yah, we knew that." Doc this time.

  "She's only 16; way underage. Everybody seems to be OK about that. Even Yolanda."

  "Yollie is happy, so we're happy for her. TG is going to be good for her. She'll be good for him." Granny this time. Tag-teaming me?

  "I got yelled at because I was going to have sex," I said. "Yollie receives applause from everyone. That doesn't seem fair."

  "Yollie's been carrying protection with her for years so she's not going to become pregnant by accident. You've refused, so if you had had sex last night, it would have been far riskier. Plus if you become pregnant, everyone in the Wilizy is under threat of death. Yollie doesn't have the same impact on the family." Granny paused, and looked at me. "You could make things easier on yourself, you know."

  "How?"

  "Cut back on the hockey games," Doc interjected.

  Definitely tag-teaming me. "But I like hockey games. I don't want to cut back!"

  "And nobody has said that you can't, so you're not breaking any rule. We understand, Winnie."

  Granny with the zinger. I had heard that she speaks her mind; hadn't been on the receiving end before. Me behaving like Winnie? Stubborn? Determined to have my own way even though it was wrong. Yah, I guess. I knew that the more we necked, the more I wanted to have sex. Therefore ...

  I glanced up. Both of them were still looking at me, hands in their laps, smiling gently.

  "I don't like you any more," I declared. But I said it without heat. Stuck my tongue out at them and put on a pouting face and stomped my two feet on the deck to emphasize that I didn't mean it.

  Granny stuck her tongue out at me in return.

  "I'm carrying protection now."

  "We heard." Doc taking his turn.

  "I am not going to have sex before I'm married. I'd hate myself."

  "Personally, I'd be happy to see you stick to that goal," Granny said.

  "What do you think of one hockey game a day and not before bedtime?"

  "Discuss it with Will," Doc said.

  "I was going to scout out Prudhoe Bay, but TG is tied up. Everyone's busy." I was hinting and hoping.

  "I'll force myself to be around you, I guess. If I have to." Doc got up, brushed some more wood chips onto the deck, put an arm around me, hoisted me over his shoulder, and hauled me bodily out of the ship. I kicked and screamed in a little girl's voice, "I don't want to go to Prudhoe. I don't want to g
o to Prudhoe."

  On the way up north, Doc told me stories about Granny growing up and what her life was like in her first marriage. I hadn't known that she had married a fire and brimstone preacher. Her husband considered sex before marriage to be a mortal sin and preached that to his flock, to his wife, and to his daughter. That's why Granny had said what she had said to me about personally approving my decision to not have sex. Her husband died when Yolanda was about 6 years old. Granny was a single mother from that point on.

 

  Back to the Table of Contents

  Chapter 6

  From Will's journals: Monday, September 5.

  Izzy and Doc's trip up to Prudhoe Bay had been a waste of time except for one discovery. Doc had identified some high landmarks where we could set up a surveillance post, but he wondered whether it would be better to station some cameras high in the sky instead. Wolf immediately jumped on that idea for watching the DPS military installations in Alberta too. So, Wolf and I spent a couple of days putting invisible cameras high in the sky above DPS installations and over the whole area around Prudhoe as well. We can now see anything coming into or out of that bay. The surveillance posts are almost the same as my repeater stations across Canada, but with slightly different electronics inside.

  We now have lots of surveillance feeds coming into the Wilizy command post where they can be stored and analyzed later. Right now, they have to be reviewed regularly as we have limited storage capacity available. TG can probably help us out on that, but he's been tied up being a dad. I may be able to rig an alarm on each sky camera that will sound when there's any significant movement. I'm not sure how I should define "significant movement" yet. That part of the plan will take some time.

  Doc and Izzy both agreed that it was too dangerous to venture too close to Prudhoe's installations, so they turned around and came home without getting close enough to actually see anything. I thought Izzy would be upset about that but she said that she enjoyed the trip. I'm not sure why she'd say that if it were a waste of time. Have I mentioned that Izzy can be confusing at times?

  # # # # # # # #