Scared to Share - Part 1, Page 2

  Charlene threw herself into sorting and filing with renewed vigor determined to prove that she was pulling her weight. She had worked straight through her lunch munching on a granola bar as she worked. She had grabbed a banana from the back lounge around 3:00 and now her stomach was reminding her that the banana was hours ago.

  Charlene slapped a file down on her desk. The purchase orders had been organized by date and would need to be entered into the computer another day after all the other papers had been filed. This was the largest job she had ever helped with and the extend of the work that needed done was intimidating. Thank goodness the IRS was only going back 7 years. She noticed that the office was quiet and looked at the clock. Shocked by the time, she grabbed her cell phone to send a quick text message to Maxwell.

  Chapter 4 - Discrete Diners

 

  Charlene quickly entered the letters into her phone with her thumbs, “On my way.” She snatched up her purse and ran to her car. Shoot! She had no time to change or freshen up or anything. As she approached the park, she saw a little black coupe sitting in the parking lot. Good, he had waited. She slowly eased into her parking spot, jumped out of her little blue economy car and ran over to Maxwell’s car and said into his now opened window, “So sorry I’m late.”

  “Hey, these things happen.” Maxwell said. His mood had quickly improved when he had gotten her text. Now seeing her, his mood was greatly improved.

  “Are you ready to go eat?” She asked.

  “Yes, I’m starved. Hop in.” He replied.

  Maybe it was being flustered by running late or maybe it was the stress of the huge project at work, but Charlene without thinking, jumped into Maxwell’s car. She gave him directions to a nice restaurant in the next town. Nothing fancy, just a pleasant place to enjoy a meal and talk. She realized after she had jumped in the car that it wasn’t a good idea, but she didn’t regret her spontaneity. She felt giddy and excited all at once, taking a chance on her own. Her stomach was all butterflies and she fidgeted in her seat, trying to calm her nerves. She was gaining a friend, that no one knew about and the possibilities were endless. He wasn’t being nice to her because her father was a college professor and he didn’t want to jeopardize his grades. He only knew the adult Charlene and he treated her as such.

  Maxwell saw her fidgeting in her seat and noticed that she seemed tense; not laid back and fun-loving as she had been that morning. Something had changed during the day and it wasn’t pleasant. He tried to stop himself from caring. He was only in this area for a short while and then he was returning to an incredibly full schedule. He didn’t have time for anyone else in his life, but for some reason he wanted to make her life easier.

  As they sat through their meal in the restaurant, Charlene seemed to relax and Maxwell listened as she shared details of her day, her college classes, her job , and her life in general. They were fast becoming friends.

  Charlene grabbed her phone to answer a text. It was her mother. “Where are you?” It read. Charlene didn’t want to have to deal with this right now. She was enjoying her night of freedom and was reluctant to let reality interfere. She threw her phone into her purse intending to ignore it. She turned back to Maxwell and continued their conversation. Her phone notified her of another text. She pretended to ignore it, knowing she would be in for a long lecture when she got home. She tried to continue talking with Maxwell, but when her phone rang with a new call, she found that her ability to keep her thoughts on their discussion had vanished. She yanked her phone out of her bag and answered with a sweet hello, wondering if her mother on the phone or Maxwell in the restaurant could tell that she wasn’t feeling sweet, but annoyed, very annoyed!

  She was embarrassed to be having this phone call in front of Maxwell and could feel her cheeks turning red. She didn’t want him to know how others treated her. What if he started to treat her as the rest of the world did? She liked being treated as his equal; as if her opinions mattered and that she was able to make her own decisions.

  “Charlene! Where are you?” Her mother practically shrieked into the phone.

  “I worked rather late on a large project and then decided to grab a bite to eat.” Charlene said as calmly as she could.

  Maxwell could tell that the conversation was not a pleasant one for Charlene. He had a strange yearning to tell the caller to leave Charlene alone and not to call back again. Whoever it was had quite an earful for Charlene. She ended the call with promises to be home soon. She surprised Maxwell by abruptly informing him that she needed to go and became extremely fidgety as she waited for the waitress to bring their check.

  As they climbed into his car, Maxwell wondered where it was that Charlene kept running off to. Was she married?

  He drove her to her car and they said their quick goodbyes. Charlene double checked to be sure that she would see him in the morning for tennis. Charlene watched Maxwell drive away, and as she began to drive home the events of the day began to catch up with her. She was becoming very tired from awaking early and the long hours she had put in at work. She decided to take a shower and spend extra time primping so she would look her best to see Maxwell in the morning. Then she planned to go right to bed and get some much needed sleep.

  Charlene soon discovered that finding her bed wouldn’t be happening for a long time. It wasn’t just her mother and father she would have to explain her evening to, but the two people she would least like to have seen this evening. Charlene contemplated turning right around and not entering her house, but leaving and not coming back. She didn’t have the backbone for such drastic behavior, so she squared her shoulders, opened the door, and braced herself for the inevitable onslaught.

  Chapter 5 - The Friendship

  Entering her home, Charlene is immediately confronted by her much older sister and brother, Joan and Chuck. Joan, a stick-thin perfectionist immediately starts reminding Charlene what an ungrateful daughter she has been, making their parents worry. Charlene hates the guilt trip and she reminds herself that it is only a guilt trip, but she still feels bad.

  “Was it so hard to pick up your cell phone and make a call?” Joan asks while shaking her own cell phone in Charlene’s face.

  Her brother Chuck sat in the corner shooting daggers at Charlene with his eyes and often shaking his head at her. Charlene didn’t think she needed to explain herself, but she spent a long evening trying to convince her family that she was truly sorry and wouldn’t neglect their feelings again.

  Charlene could tell that they cared for one another, but did they care for her. There was a time when she had felt that she and her father were close, way back when she was little. As the years wore on, she seemed to have become more and more of a disappointment to him. As always, it was her against her family without anyone to champion her cause. No one understood her and she felt so all alone. All she had done was eat out. She was entitled to a few hours to herself every once in a while. But as the accusations continued, she began to doubt herself, feeling like the worst daughter. She determined in her mind to never cause her family unnecessary worry again.

  Charlene took a quick shower and still felt sad. In a desperate attempt to ease her sadness, she picked up her phone and sent Maxwell a quick text. “I enjoyed our dinner.” She sent him.

  Maxwell was surprised to get such a late text. He climbed out of bed and grabbed his phone. It was Charlene and her text made him smile. “I did, too.” He sent back.

  “I am glad that we are meeting in the morning.” Her next text said.

  “Me, too.” He sent back.

  After sending Maxwell a final text of “Goodnight” and receiving a similar one back, Charlene set her alarm and quickly fell asleep with a smile on her face, not feeling so alone anymore.

  Charlene and Maxwell met to play tennis the next two days. They enjoyed dinner together, as well as lunch. Every moment that Maxwell wasn’t in conference, they found a way to be together and talk. He was the friend that Charlene needed.

&nb
sp; As Maxwell heard about the dynamics of Charlene’s family, he shared her annoyance with their constant meddling, but he also found himself missing his own family. He hadn’t talked to either of his brothers in a while and his mother had passed away some time ago. With the demanding work schedule he had adhered to, striving to be the best and work his way to the top, he hadn’t had time to keep in touch with his brothers. He found himself wondering what they were doing with their lives. Work and success didn’t seem as important as it used to. He realized that he may have sacrificed too much to gain the world’s esteem. What good was money and success with no one with which to share it?

  Charlene loved life and people and her positive attitude was wearing off on Maxwell. He enjoyed their time together and their frequent texts throughout the day. Usually itching to get home by the end of the week, Maxwell found himself reluctant to leave. He and Charlene exchanged email addresses with the promise to stay in touch. He stayed so late Friday night visiting with Charlene in his car on a deserted mountain road that he found the need to stay another night in the hotel and drive back the next day.

  Only when Saturday arrived, he desired to return home even less. He stayed another night at the hotel thinking that a good friend was exactly what he needed. It was so novel being with someone who had no idea of the importance of his job and didn’t look at him with dollar signs in her eyes.

  On Sunday Maxwell noticed that Charlene was looking incredibly tired and realized that the busy last few days were taking their toll on her. The long hours of overtime, the sneaking around behind her parents’ back, and the late night texting or instant messaging were too much for her. Maxwell reminded himself of this often as he drove the many miles home.

  The days and weeks that followed found Maxwell and Charlene continuing their electronic friendship. Charlene’s spontaneous texts throughout the day and her frequent emails always brought a smile to Maxwell’s face.

  Charlene kept busy most of the next month organizing ABC Rex’s papers and was delighted to see her bank account growing. She felt sure that her ability to save her money was a sign of her maturity. She knew that she was growing up even if her family was in denial.

  Charlene was happy that her work schedule was diminishing and looked forward to being able to meet Maxwell at a cabin he owned about halfway between their two homes. He had given her very detailed directions on how to get there and even sent her a key to the cabin. She had rushed home every day at lunchtime for several days to check the mail for the key. She kept it on her key ring dreaming of getting away. Maxwell wanted Charlene to meet him at the cabin the first time she came so that he could go over some things with her regarding the heat and maintenance of the cabin. After that she was welcome to use the cabin whenever she desired. The freedom a visit to the cabin would afford her was more than Charlene could wrap her mind around. No one looking over her shoulder, no one questioning her every action, could such a thing be possible?

  As Charlene’s overtime came to an end, two things happened to prevent her from visiting the cabin: her mother’s summer vacation from teaching high school English started and her weekends began to fill up quickly with weddings and reunions. It was at the first wedding of the summer that Charlene discovered her mother’s and aunts’ unpleasant plans for her. She had never missed Maxwell more than at the wedding of her cousin Mary. The torture began as soon as the reception started. Discovering during the ceremony that she had forgotten her cell phone, her lifeline to Maxwell, she had known that this wedding would be a struggle, but she never imaged the extent of the trial that awaited her.

  Chapter 6 – The Wedding

  As Charlene looked around the reception hall at peach tablecloths, yellow balloons, and orange streamers, she felt almost sick. Never had she seen a worse color scheme. Now she loved a good reception with lots of dancing but this wait was becoming unbearable. She sat at a table with her parents, Todd and Annette, her sister Joan and her sister’s husband Dan, her brother Chuck and his wife Rachel, Aunt Olivia and Uncle Fred. The topic of conversation for the last half hour had focused on Charlene and her lack of direction. They wanted to know what kind of job she thought she could get after graduation, not having settled on a major yet. They discussed her lack of a boyfriend and which of her flaws they felt kept her from getting one. They spoke down to her, answering for her as if she were unable to form an educated thought. Her family’s tone was one of pity rather than malice, but it still hurt Charlene’s feelings. She wished that she could leave. She was in no mood to celebrate. This onslaught was incredibly embarrassing for her.

  Unfortunately, she had ridden with her parents. She had preferred to drive herself but her father had thought it was a terrible waste of gas. Rather than disagree with him, she had conceded to his whim. They had left a half an hour earlier than she would have and consequently she had felt rushed, evidenced by her forgotten cell phone. Ugh! She felt so trapped. It didn’t help that when her other aunts had stopped by the table to greet them that her aunts had whispered encouragement to her mother Annette regarding Charlene. They spoke in loud whispers that carried far across the table and probably half way around the room.

  According to the general census, she was too shy, introverted, quiet, awkward, and timid. Oh yes, and she had even heard, late bloomer mentioned as well. She also learned through their actions, that apparently they all thought she was blind, deaf, and dumb. She wanted to yell, “Hello! I can hear you!” but she didn’t want to draw any more attention to herself. Who was she kidding? She didn’t have the backbone to stand up for herself. Thank goodness Maxwell wasn’t here to witness this injustice!

  She smelled the food and wished the bride and groom would arrive so that the meal could start. She didn’t have much of an appetite surrounded by the psychedelic nightmare masquerading as the wedding’s colors, but she hoped the food would occupy her family’s attention and mouths. To her horror, the torture continued as various guests came up to her to introduce young males to her. After she told the guy that it was nice to meet him, inevitably an awkward silence would follow. During one of these uncomfortable pauses Joan actually kicked her. When she looked at her sister, Joan kept tilting her head toward the newcomer. Charlene had no idea what Joan expected her to say.

  Charlene soon realized that these introductions were a forced attempt to find her a date, orchestrated by her meddling mother and aunts. From the looks of things, her sister was in on the conspiracy as well. Charlene desperately wanted to leave. She felt so trapped without her car. From now on she would drive herself. Catching herself in her farfetched plans, she modified her thoughts to a more plausible scenario: next time she would try to convince her father that driving herself was a good idea.

  To make matters worse, when an aunt with another victim approached the table, Charlene actually saw this aunt wink at her mother. Could these women at least try to show some discretion? Regrettably, the table introductions were just a warm-up for the real humiliation that was to come. Charlene was able to postpone more embarrassment for a little while by failing to catch the tossed bouquet disappointing her mother and her mother’s groupies.

  Charlene was relieved when the time finally arrived for dancing. This was her opportunity to escape the overzealous matchmakers. She was ready to spring from her seat as soon as the first fast song was played. Then she remembered that this was a wedding reception and one must play the waiting game in order to arrive at the enjoyable part. So she sat through the bride and groom’s first dance, the bride and her father’s dance, then the groom and his mother dancing.

  Ugh! She needed her cell phone. She was totally going through withdrawal. Maxwell would know the right thing to text her. He would have been able to help her see the humor in this terrible ordeal.

  At last the floor was open for anyone to dance. She was trying to guess how many slow songs before a fast piece, zoning out her mother who was tactfully pointing out different men around the room and asking Charlene what she thought of ea
ch one, when someone approached her. She looked up to see a tall guy in his mid-twenties smiling down at her.

  “Hi, I’m Jack. We met earlier. Would you, uh like to dance, um with me for this uh song?” He asked.

  “Oh yes. That would be nice.” Charlene answered. She wasn’t sure but she thought she heard a collective sigh from the rest of her table.

  Charlene walked to a corner of the dance floor to slow dance with Jack. He wasn’t a bad dancer, but kept trying to hold her much closer than she felt comfortable being held by a complete stranger. He was pleasant and she began to relax feeling that the rest of the reception might not be so bad. She was enjoying the release of built-up stress as she listened to the lovely music when Jack tilted his head down to say something to her. She didn’t know how she missed it before, but Jack’s breath was so pungent that she almost stumbled. Fortunately, she caught herself. She spent the rest of the incredibly long song trying to avoid the powerful blast of Jack’s breath, while at the same time pretending not to notice in an effort to protect his feelings.