Holiday Happenings Part 2 "Can You Imagine...?" Volume IV, Page 3

  And peering into the night, I gazed all around.

  The moon cast an eerie shadow across the chicken farm,

  Strangely, I didn’t feel the need for alarm.

  When what to my blinking eyes did I see,

  An enormous eagle’s nest, but how could it be!

  A buzzard was driving and sat high on his perch,

  He was tilted forward slightly because he had a bad lurch.

  Suddenly soaring, diving and gliding about as they flew,

  Were three quail, two barn owls and a partridge too!

  “Now, Daffy! Now, Donald! Now, Woody and Flitter!

  On, Woodstock! On, Polly! On, Talon and Twitter!

  To the edge of the cornfield, to the chicken coop go!

  Go with worms, go with scratch. Go! Go! Go!”

  Toward the front door they flew the huge nest.

  Not nary a one feathered fowl stopping to rest.

  Flying straight toward me, I moved to one side,

  Yet Cock-a-doodle Doo knew it wouldn’t fit inside.

  Hopping off his roost, his wings all about in a flurry,

  By all the commotion I knew he was in a hurry.

  Dapper and dandy in his bright red cap and suit,

  He was neat as a pin all the way to his boots.

  A burlap sack full of scratch he lugged behind,

  It looked quiet heavy, but he didn’t seem to mind.

  His eyes were beady, black and very keen,

  He was absolutely the biggest rooster I had ever seen!

  His beak was sharp, his feathers they glistened,

  He crowed out orders as all the birds listened.

  A baby chick looked up then tucked his head without a peep,

  The rooster glanced about as if to see if all were still asleep,

  Cocking his head in my direction, not once, but twice,

  He threw cracked corn about the coop like throwing rice.

  Passing the stockings he strutted, stuffing them as he went,

  Studying his work for a moment with head bent.

  Then he gazed at me with a steady black stare,

  I wanted to look away, but I didn’t dare.

  Raising his wings high he called to his flock of birds,

  Out of the coop they flew as a huge feathered herd.

  Flying ahead in a rush to get to his next stop,

  The huge nest was teetering and I thought it might drop.

  Hearing Cock-a-doodle Doo cackle as they soared out of sight,

  “Merry Christmas to all, and to all fowl a good-night!”

  ****

  Previously Owned Gift Wrap

  Column #76 12-20-07

  I’m not going to ask you what you got because all I really want to know right now is…what did you do with all the gift wrap? Seriously, your presents weren’t teeny tiny. If fact, one was nearly half as tall as the tree and wrapped in metallic red and green paper. And you only had two gift bags. Leaving a complete sea of wrapping paper, ribbons and bows scattered across the carpet from the tree to the couch. Sorta like a happy trail of colorful, holiday celebration.

  Minus the few pieces the cat shredded into designer hamster bedding. Also the blue metallic piece used to mop up spilled Pumpkin Spice Egg Nog. Oh, then Uncle Tater called and you used a piece to write down the number for Shoppers Anonymous…again. Shame how Cousin Frank can’t control his holiday spending. But I’m beginning to suspect he enjoys the week at Zero Credit Boot Camp every year. Shoot, who wouldn’t want to be in Las Vegas, even if it meant absolutely no credit cards, debit cards, gift cards, frequent shopper cards or any other form of plastic currency? On second thought, only your Cousin Frank thinks it’s a good idea.

  Okay, back to gift wrap. You know you’re going to re-gift the fondue pot from Aunt Mattie, so why not re-gift the gift wrap. Sure! It’s a completely economical way to get the most out of any wrapping paper. Since you’re a wadder (you may need to talk to someone about suppressed aggression), flatten wadded paper on a large surface…say the dining room table.

  Start by using the palm of your hands, alternating left and right, smooth the paper from the center out to the edges. There shouldn’t be any staples, but you never know what holiday pranks little JP was up to this year, so be careful. For severely wrinkled gift wrap, try ironing with a low setting. Just don’t use steam because the ink on the paper could run. (Nothing like a runny Rudolph to dampen someone’s mood.) Of course, you tore most of the wrapping paper off like it was on fire, so use invisible tape to mend the torn edges. Wa-la! Previously owned gift wrap (POGW)! Just re-roll paper on an empty wrapping paper roll and save it for next year.

  Bet you’ve never thought there were so many other uses for used wrapping paper? Actually, you’ve probably never thought about wrapping paper once you got to your present. Well, reaching far beyond the ordinary to the extraordinary…here are some great suggestions for previously owned gift wrap.

  First, if you managed to receive a large enough gift with scenic paper, you can use the paper to cover your windows. Next time it’s rainy or dreary, look at your window and be magically transported into a beautiful holiday scene. (Okay, no magic, just a better view than the sight of your neighbor’s pink vinyl siding.)

  Or use POGW to line your office desk drawers. What a great way to brighten your day when opening your desk drawer, only to be greeted by colorful dancing snowmen. Guaranteed to bring back memories of that jingle bell tie from little Susie. Got a creative flair? Try wrapping your pencil cup holder, paper clip dispenser and ‘in’ and ‘out’ trays with POGW. Your office will sing with merriment long after the holidays have faded.

  And who wouldn’t love to drop in your bathroom to find Tweedy Bird donning a Santa hat adorning your toilet seat. Why stop there? Frame the bathroom mirror, and cover the commode tank lid too!

  Got wee ones in school? Surprise them by making brightly colored book covers for their text books. What child wouldn’t love to bring Rudolph to school? Or, ladies cover your holiday shoe box lids with used wrapping paper. Then you’ll always be able to find your peek-toe pumps when you need them.

  Men…since you only have two pairs of special occasion shoes, one brown pair, and one black pair. I suppose you could stuff the toes of the shoes with POGW so they’ll hold their shape between special occasions. (Men’s shoes just aren’t fun. Go figure.)

  Hey, if you’re artistically inclined you could use an old picture frame matt and cut POGW to matt holiday pictures. What a decorative way to keep the spirit of the season going. And your pictures will look amazing!

  Wondering what to do with that Origami book Aunt Mattie gave you last year. Shoot, dig it out and make some holiday dinosaurs, frogs or giraffes to amaze your friends and neighbors. (Except the lady in the pink house next door.) May I suggest, however, spraying the paper with “No, No Kitty!” first, so the cat doesn’t try to make hamster bedding again.

  Can you imagine…turning into Martha Stewart?

  “Christmas Spirit” Resolution

  Column #273 12-29-11

  I’m sad Christmas is over because I know that pre-holiday life as we knew it has returned. Gone are the kind words from strangers and sea of smiling faces everywhere. Unfortunately, most of us will again lose ourselves in a vortex of self-satisfaction and instant gratification never to be heard from until the sparkling decorations and twinkling lights temporarily snap us out of our self-absorbed trance for another holiday season.

  Wouldn’t it be awesome though if we kept the Spirit of Christmas on our resolution list, every year, for the rest of our lives. Besides, everyone knows what ‘Christmas Spirit’ means.

  It’s when we smile at each other more; act selfless more; even call, write and visit friends we don’t keep in touch with the rest of the year more. It’s when we go out of our way to do kind things for strangers and remember to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ often.

  And that’s just the icing. The actual cake of it all means the Christmas
Spirit sticks to ribs so much so we’re happy just to be alive. Feeling all warm and fuzzy inside we hug our loved ones more. We hear ourselves speaking kinder about those who have wronged us in the past. We might even ask to be forgiven for doing a wrong to someone else.

  Yes, the Christmas Spirit season should last all year. It’s a kinder, gentler season of living that crosses all boundaries. It’s blind to ethnic labels, social and economic status and all preconceived prejudices. The Spirit of Christmas softens hard edges allowing the warmth in our hearts to spread to others. It even melts icy stares and causes unexplained giddiness. We feel younger, happier and full of joy when we are filled with the Christmas Spirit.

  Therefore, I challenge each of you to add “Keep the Spirit of Christmas going” to your resolution list this year and every year. And since we’ve been smack dab in the middle of the Christmas Spirit for the last month or so, we already know how it’s done. But just so there’s no confusion, adding a few ‘buzz’ words will help keep the Christmas Spirit alive all year.

  Start with respect then consideration and add compassion and thoughtfulness, of course. Don’t forget patience, positive attitude, or saying please and thank you often. And remember, kindness is the gift that keeps on giving, so give kindness as often as possible.

  Remember, aside from material things all we have is ourselves and our actions. So, let your actions carry the Spirit of Christmas all year. After all, the Spirit has never been just for Christmas!

  Can you imagine…keeping the Christmas Spirit alive all year?

  Look for Volume V “Motivation Moments”

  being released early 2013.

  THE END

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