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Giggle Book One

BobA. Troutt

Giggle Book One

  By Bobby A. Troutt

  Copyright 2012 Bobby A. Troutt

  Table of Contents

  Frog’s Teeth

  The Ballerina

  The Seedless Watermelon

  Toothless Jack

  You Know What I Mean—Jelly Bean

  Bee Sting

  The Nut House

  Bubbles

  *****

  Giggle Book One

  Frog’s Teeth

  Possum Creek ran along the hills and hollows of Raccoon Tail Road. It ran down by the wet springs, across the meadow and down by Waterview Manor before it crossed over and down by Water’s Edge Lane. Waterview Manor was a home for elderly people. People from miles around came and lived there after they retired. It was a quiet and cozy little place. They played checkers, croquet, cards and other games. They had barbeques, cakewalks and picnics. One of the main things they loved to do was fish along the banks of Possum Creek.

  Bones was probably the oldest resident at the manor. There wasn’t anything he liked better than fishing. Day after day, he would slip off sometime after supper in the dusk of the evening. You could hear him down by the creek having fun. All you could hear was his line hitting the water and the frogs croaking. In the far off distance, just up the way, you could hear the clickety-clack sound of the evening train crossing the tracks.

  Well, it so happened one evening that Lloyd and Guthrie, whose nickname was Beanpole, saw Bones fishing from the bank. Lloyd and Beanpole had lived along the creek for years. Now, those two pranksters loved to play jokes and have fun at the expense of others. They believed that a good laugh was the best medicine.

  Bones had been slipping down to the creek later in the evening for several months. Lloyd and Beanpole had been watching him and had made their minds up that party time had come.

  “Okay, Beanpole, you remember what we agreed on, don’t you?” asked Lloyd.

  “Yeah, man,” replied Beanpole. “I know exactly what to do.”

  “Alright,” croaked Lloyd as he and Beanpole slapped hands, butted elbows and slid their slimy hands together into a slap.

  Carefully, Beanpole slipped into the water as Lloyd eased in behind Bones. All fell silent about the creek. There was no ribbit or croak. There was no chirping of the crickets or even a stir of wind. Cautiously, Beanpole eased his head up out of the water and looked about. He listened carefully and waited patiently. All he could hear was someone snoring. It was Bones; he had fallen asleep. All of a sudden, without warning, Beanpole jerked the fishing line and disappeared underwater. Startled, Bones leaped to his feet. His hands were going every kind of way as he tried to grab the rod and reel; his legs bowed and buckled under him. As he danced along the creek bed, Lloyd jumped up around his neck and onto his shoulders.

  “Croak!” he bellowed out.

  The sound terrified Bones. He fought to get away. As he screamed out into the night his false teeth flew out of his mouth and into the water.

  “Iddddd!” screamed Bones as he fell into the water. “Iddddd!” he screamed as he picked himself up and ran up the bank toward the manor.

  “Can you believe it!” shouted Lloyd.

  “Did you see the look on his face?” laughed Beanpole. “I wouldn’t take anything for that moment.”

  As the two comedians flopped around on the bank, they couldn’t get over their practical joke.

  “I bet that old geezer aged thirty more years,” said Lloyd.

  “Thirty,” replied Beanpole, “more like sixty.”

  They laughed so hard their bellies began to ache. But, Beanpole suddenly stopped laughing and a suspicious smile came across his face.

  “What’s that?” asked Beanpole.

  “What’s what?” replied Lloyd.

  “Look in the water; there’s something white and sparkly,” exclaimed Beanpole as both of them looked down in the water.

  “It’s…it’s,” stuttered Beanpole.

  “It’s what?” shouted Lloyd.

  Slowly, Beanpole eased his hand down into the water, reached over and picked it up.

  “Hey, look,” said Beanpole. “It’s teeth; they must belong to Bones.”

  “But how?” asked Lloyd. “How could his teeth be here and he’s over yonder.”

  “They must have slid out of his mouth,” replied Beanpole, “when he screamed. What are we going to do?”

  “I don’t know,” replied Lloyd. “Maybe he’ll grow some more.”

  Beanpole slipped the teeth into his mouth and smiled real big.

  “Cool, man,” said Lloyd, “real cool. Those pearly whites really accent your smile.”

  All of a sudden, the teeth began to flop about in Beanpole’s mouth. They would slide to the left and then to the right. As Beanpole tried his best to control them, they popped, snapped and rolled over and over in his mouth until the bottom was on top and the top was on the bottom.

  “Here, let me see them!” shouted Lloyd. “I’ll show you how to do it.”

  Lloyd reached for the teeth and Beanpole yelled out, “Yuck, nasty!”

  Quickly, Lloyd dipped them into the water, popped them into his mouth and smiled really big. About that time, Wart the frog came by.

  “Hey, man, what a cool smile,” he said. “Where did you get it?”

  “Oh, they were lying around,” replied Lloyd.

  “I sure would like to have a nice pearly white smile like that,” said Wart.

  “You would,” replied Beanpole.

  “Yep, I would; I’d give anything. Why, I would even give my dragonfly collection to have a smile that nice,” Wart stated.

  “You want them,” said Lloyd, “you got them.”

  Wart shoved the teeth in his mouth. Immediately, a big bright smiled crossed his face.

  “Oh, by the way,” asked Wart, “what are they called?”

  As Lloyd was trying to think of a reply, Beanpole spoke up, “They are…uh…frog’s teeth. Yeah, that’s right, frog’s teeth.”

  “Cool, man. See ya’ll later,” replied Wart as he disappeared upon the bank.

  “That’s it!” Lloyd yelled.

  “What?” Beanpole cried.

  “I have an idea,” replied Lloyd.

  “Uh-oh!” moaned Beanpole.

  It wasn’t long until the word of frog’s teeth spread about Possum Creek. Everyone wanted some; Lloyd and Beanpole were doing any and everything they could to take care of everyone’s needs. They had a ball and accumulated quite a bit of treasure. But, Bones had not forgotten what they did to him. He wanted revenge and his teeth back. He had been sneaking down to the creek every day. He watched, day after day, as Lloyd and Beanpole scared the tenants of Waterview Manor who came to fish.

  “What a life, bro,” said Lloyd. “We are getting down. My man, look at all those smiling brothers and sisters along the creek bank.”

  “Yep, that’s true, Lloyd,” replied Beanpole. “But, there are so many sunken faces at the manor with no smiles.”

  “Oh, don’t worry about that,” said Lloyd. “They’ll grow another set. Besides, look at it this way. They’ll never have another toothache.”

  Yep, sure enough, the prankster frogs, Lloyd and Beanpole, had somehow managed to get all the false teeth from the elderly tenants of Waterview Manor. All the frogs along Possum Creek smiled real big to show off their pearly white teeth; I mean frog’s teeth.

  Bones was determined not to let them get away with it. So, he and all the tenants of Waterview Manor climbed into their boats with flashlights and nets and headed down to the creek. Quietly, they moved in on the frogs. In unison, they shined their flashlights on all the pearly whites. The light was so bright it blinded the frogs and caused them to fal
l into the water. The tenants dropped the net into the water and gathered up all the frogs. Old Bones just giggled to himself as, one by one, the frogs disappeared from the creek that night.

  After that night, everything was quiet on Possum Creek. There were no more croaks or any splashes. Back at the manor, the elderly had their teeth back. They were smiling, playing cards, playing croquet and reminiscing about the big frog-leg supper they had a few weeks ago. But, to this day, no one has ever mentioned seeing Beanpole or Lloyd in the skillet. But, they were never seen around Possum Creek again.

  There are many tales that have been told about Lloyd and Beanpole. The most likely one is that they were so busy getting everyone else frog’s teeth, they failed to get them some. I guess that turned out to be in their best interest. Old Bones, to this day, still sits on the banks of Possum Creek fishing and giggling the day away.