Pippi Goes on Board, Page 3
Astrid Lindgren whole class."
"Alas!" said Pippi, biting one of her braids. "Alas! And of course
I can't come just because I don't go to school. Seems as if people
think they can treat you just any way if you haven't been to school
and learned pluttification."
"Multiplication," said Annika emphatically.
"Yes, isn't that what I said?-'pluttification.'"
"We're going to walk about seven miles-way, way out into the
woods. And then we're going to play there," said Tommy.
"Alas," said Pippi once again.
The next day was so warm and beautiful that all the school
children in the little town found it very hard to sit still in their
seats. The teacher opened all the windows and let the sun come
streaming in. Just outside the school window stood a birch tree, and
high up in it sat a little starling, singing so cheerily that the
children just listened to him and didn't care at all that nine times
nine equals eighty-one.
Suddenly Tommy jumped up in amazement. "Look, Teacher," he cried,
pointing out of the window, "there's Pippi!" All the children turned
to look and, sure enough, there sat Pippi on a branch of the birch
tree. She was sitting very close to the window, for the branch
reached almost down to the window sill.
"Hi, Teacher!" she cried. "Hi, kids!"
"Good morning, little Pippi," said Teacher. Once Pippi had come to
school for a whole day, so Teacher knew her very well. Pippi and
Teacher had agreed that Pippi might come back to school when she grew
a little older and more sensible.
"What do you want, little Pippi?" asked Teacher.
"Oh, I was just going to ask you to throw a little pluttification
out of the window," said Pippi, "as much as would be necessary for me
to be allowed to go to the picnic with you. And if you have
discovered any new letters, you might throw them out at the same
time."
"Don't you want to come in for a little while?" askedTeacher.
"I'd rather not," said Pippi honestly, leaning back comfortably on
the branch. "I just get dizzy. The knowledge in there is so thick you
can cut it with a knife. But don't you think, Teacher," she continued
hopefully, "that a little of that knowledge might fly out through the
window and stick to me-just enough so that I could go with you on the
picnic?"
"It might," said Teacher, and then went on with the arithmetic
lesson. All the children thought it was very pleasant to have Pippi
sitting in a tree outside. She had given them all candy and toys that
day when she went shopping. Pippi had Mr. Nilsson with her, of
course, and the children thought it was fun to see how he threw
himself from one branch to another. Sometimes he even hopped down
into the window, and once he took a long jump and landed right on
Tommy's head and began to scratch his hair. But then Teacher told
Pippi she'd have to call Mr. Nilsson because Tommy was just going to
figure out how much 315 divided by 7 is, and you can't do that when
you have a monkey in your hair. But anyway, lessons just wouldn't go
right that morning. The spring sunshine, the starling, and Pippi and
Mr. Nilsson -all this was just too much for the children.
"I don't know what's got into you, children," said Teacher.
"Do you know what, Teacher?" said Pippi out in the tree. "To tell
the truth, I don't think this is the right kind of a day for
pluttification."
"We're doing division," said Teacher.
"On this kind of day you shouldn't have any kind of 'shun,'" said
Pippi, "unless of course it's recreation."
Teacher gave up. "Maybe you can furnish some recreation, Pippi,"
she said.
"No, I'm not very good at recreation," said Pippi, suddenly
hanging over the branch by her knee joints so that her red braids
almost touched the ground. "But I know a school where they don't have
anything but recreation. 'All Day: Recreation' is what it says on the
school program."
"Is that so?" said Teacher. "And where is that school?"
"In Australia," said Pippi. "In a little village in Australia. Way
down in the southern part." She sat up on the branch again, and her
eyes began to sparkle.
"What kind of recreation do they have?" asked Teacher.
"Oh, all kinds," said Pippi. "Usually they begin by jumping out of
the window, one after another. Then they give a terrific yell and
rush into the schoolroom again and skip around on the seats as fast
as ever they can.
"But what does their teacher say then?" asked Teacher.
"She?" said Pippi. "Oh, she skips too-faster than anyone else.
Then the children usually fight for half an hour or so, and the
teacher stands near and cheers them on. When the weather is rainy all
the kids take off their clothes and rush out into the rain and dance
and jump. The teacher plays a march on the organ for them so that
they can keep time. Some of them stand under the rain spout so that
they can have a real shower."
"Do they indeed?" said Teacher.
"They certainly do," said Pippi, "and it's an awfully good school,
one of the better ones in Australia. But it is very far down in the
south."
"Yes, I can imagine so," said Teacher. "But I don't think we'll
have as much fun as all that in this school."
"Too bad," said Pippi. "If it was only a matter of skipping around
on the seats I'd dare to come in for a while."
"You'll have to wait to skip until we have the picnic," said
Teacher.
"Oh, may I really go to the picnic?" cried Pippi, and was so happy
that she turned a somersault backward right out of the tree. "I'll
certainly write and tell them about that in Australia. Then they can
keep on with their recreation as much as they want to. Because a
picnic is certainly more fun."
4.
Pippi Goes to the School Picnic
THERE was a tramping of many feet on the ground, and much talk and
laughter. There was Tommy with a knapsack on his back, and Annika in
a brand- new cotton dress, and their teacher and all their classmates
except one poor child who had the misfortune to get a sore throat on
the very day of the picnic. And there in front of all the others was
Pippi, riding on her horse. Back of her sat Mr. Nilsson with his
pocket mirror in his hand. Yes, there he sat, making "sun cats" with
the mirror and looking extraordinarily pleased when he managed to put
a sun cat right in Tommy's eye.
Annika had been absolutely sure it would rain on this important
day. In fact, she had been so sure of it that she had almost been
angry at the weather in advance. But just think how lucky you can be
sometimes-the sun continued to shine just as usual, even if it was
picnic day, and Annika's heart almost jumped for joy as she walked
along the road in her brand-new cotton dress. For that matter, all
the children looked happy and eager. Pussy willows were growing
everywhere along the roadside, and in one place there was a whole
field of wild flowers. All the children decided to pick big bunches
 
; of pussy willows and bouquets of yellow wild flowers on the way
home.
"Such a glorious, glorious day," said Annika with a sigh, looking
up at Pippi, who sat on her horse as straight as a general.
"Yes, I haven't had so much fun since I fought with the champion
boxer in San Francisco," said Pippi. "Would you like to ride a little
while?"
Annika would indeed, so Pippi lifted her up onto the horse's back,
and there she rode, right in front of Pippi. When the other children
saw her, of course they all wanted to ride too. And Pippi let them,
each in turn. But Tommy and Annika were allowed to ride a little
longer than most of the others. There was one girl who had a blister
on her heel. She was allowed to sit behind Pippi and ride all the
way. Mr. Nilsson pulled her braids whenever he could get hold of
them.
The picnic was to be held in a wood which was called the Monsters'
Forest-probably Pippi thought because it was so monstrously
beautiful. When they were almost there Pippi jumped out of the
saddle, patted her horse, and said, "Now you've carried us for such a
long time that you must be tired. It isn't right for one person to do
all the work."
And she lifted the horse up in her strong arms and carried him
until they came to a little clearing in the woods and Teacher said,
"We'll stop here."
Pippi looked around and screamed, "Come out now, all you monsters,
and let's see who is the strongest."
Teacher explained that there were no monsters in the woods, and
Pippi was much disappointed.
"A Forest of Monsters without any monsters! What will folks think
of next? Soon they'll invent fires without any fire and a
Christmas-tree gift party without any Christmas tree-just out of
stinginess.. But on the day they begin having candy stores without
any candy, I'll go and tell them a thing or two. Oh, ,well, I'll have
to be a monster myself, I suppose. I don't see any other way out of
it."
She let out such a terrific roar that Teacher had to hold her
hands over her ears and several of the children were scared almost to
death.
"Oh, yes, we'll play that Pippi is a monster," cried Tommy,
enchanted, and clapped his hands. All the children thought that was a
fine idea. The Monster then went into a deep crevice between the
rocks, which was to be its den, and all the children ran around
outside, teasing and yelling, "Stupid, stupid Monster, stupid, stupid
Monster!"
Out rushed the Monster, bellowing and chasing the children, who
ran in all directions to hide. Those who were captured were dragged
home to the den in the rocks, and the Monster said they were to be
cooked for dinner. Sometimes they managed to escape while the Monster
was out hunting for more children, although in order to get away they
had to climb up a steep rock and that was hard work. There was only
one little pine tree to get hold of, and it was difficult to know
where to put one's feet. But it was very exciting, and the children
thought it was the best game they had ever played.
Teacher lay in the green grass, reading a book and casting a
glance at the children every now and then. "That's the wildest
monster I ever saw," she mumbled to herself.
And it certainly was. The Monster jumped around and bellowed and
threw three or four boys over its shoulder at once and dragged them
down into the den. Sometimes the Monster climbed furiously up into
the highest treetops and skipped from branch to branch, just as if it
were a monkey. Sometimes it threw itself upon the horse's back and
chased a whole crowd of children who were trying to escape through
the trees. With the horse still in full gallop, the Monster would
lean down from the saddle, snatch up the children, place them in
front of itself on the horse, and gallop madly back to the den,
yelling, "Now I'm going to cook you for dinner!"
It was such fun the children thought they'd never want to stop.
But suddenly everything was quiet, and when Tommy and Annika came
running to see what was the matter they found the Monster sitting on
a stone with a very strange expression on its face, looking at
something in its hand.
"He's dead. Look, he's absolutely dead," said the Monster.
It was a little baby bird that was dead. It had fallen out of the
nest and killed itself.
"Oh, what a shame!" said Annika. The Monster nodded.
"Pippi, you're crying," said Tommy suddenly.
"Crying? Me?" said Pippi. "Of course I'm not crying."
"Yes, but your eyes are all red," insisted Tommy.
"My eyes red?" said Pippi, and borrowed Mr. Nils-son's pocket
mirror to see. "Do you call that red? Then you ought to have been
with Father and me in Batavia. There was a man there whose eyes were
so red that the police refused to allow him on the streets."
"Why?" asked Tommy.
"Because people thought he was a stop sign, of course. And there
was a dreadful traffic jam every time he came out. Red eyes? Me? No
sir-ee, you needn't think I'd cry for a little scrap of a bird like
this," said Pippi.
"Stupid, stupid Monster! Stupid, stupid Monster!" From all
directions the children came running to see where the Monster was
hiding. The Monster took the little scrap of a bird and laid it down
very carefully on a bed of soft moss.
"If I could, I'd bring you to life again," she said with a deep
sigh.
Then she let out a terrific yell. "Now I'll cook you for dinner,"
she shrieked. And with happy shouts the children disappeared into the
bushes.
One of the girls in the class-her name was Ulla- lived right near
the Forest of the Monsters. Ulla's mother had promised her that she
could invite her teacher and her classmates-and Pippi, too, of
course-for refreshments in the garden. So when the children had
played the monster game for a long time, and climbed about among the
rocks for a while, and sailed their birch-bark boats on a large pool,
and seen how many of them dared to jump off a high stone, then Ulla
said that it must be time to go to her house and have their fruit
punch. And Teacher, who had read her book from cover to cover,
agreed. She gathered the children together and they left the Forest
of the Monsters.
Out on the road they met a man with a wagonload of sacks. They
were heavy sacks and there were many of them, and the man's horse was
tired. All of a sudden one of the wagon wheels went down into the
ditch. The man, whose name was Mr. Blomsterlund, became terrifically
angry. He thought it was the horse's fault. He got out his whip and
immediately began to beat the horse fast and furiously. The horse
pulled and tugged and tried with all its might to pull the load up
onto the road again, but it couldn't do it. Mr. Blomsterlund grew
angrier and angrier and beat harder and harder. Then Teacher noticed
him and was almost overcome with sympathy for the poor horse.
"How can you bear to beat an animal that way?" she said
to Mr.
Blomsterlund.
He let the whip rest a moment and spat before he answered. "Don't
interfere with what doesn't concern you," said he. "Otherwise it
might just happen that I'll give you a taste of the whip too, the
whole lot of you."
He spat once more and picked up the whip again. The poor horse
trembled through its whole body. Then something came dashing through
the crowd of children like a flash of lightning. It was Pippi. She
was absolutely white around the nose, and when Pippi was white around
the nose she was angry. Tommy and An- nika knew that. She rushed at
Mr. Bldrnsterlund, caught him around the waist, and threw him high up
in the air. When he came down, she caught himand threw him up again.
Four, five, six times he had to take a trip up into the air. He
didn't know what had happened to him.
"Help! Help!" he cried, terrified. At last he landed with a thump
on the road. He had lost the whip.
Pippi went and stood in front of him with her hands on her hips.
"You are not to hit that horse any more. You are not to do it, I tell
you. Once down in Cape Town I met another man who was whipping his
horse. He had on such a beautiful uniform, that man, and I told him
that if he ever whipped his horse again I'd scratch and claw him so
that there wouldn't be one single thread left whole in his beautiful
uniform. Just imagine, a week later he did whip his horse again.
Wasn't it too bad about such a nice uniform?"
Mr. Blomsterlund was still sitting in the road, completely
bewildered.
"Where are you going with your load?" asked Pippi.
Mr. Blomsterlund, still frightened, pointed at a cottage a little
way down the road. "Home, over there," he said.
Then Pippi unhitched the horse, which stood there trembling with
weariness and fright. "There, there, little horsie!" she said. "Now
you'll see another kettle of fish!"
With that she lifted it up in her strong arms and carried it home
to its stall. The horse looked just as astonished as Mr. Blomsterlund
did.
All the children were standing with Teacher, waiting for Pippi.
And Mr. Blomsterlund stood by his load, scratching his head. He
didn't know how he was going to get it home.
Then Pippi came back. She took one of the big, heavy sacks and
hung it on Mr. Blomsterlund's back.
"There now!" said she. "Let's see if you're as good at carrying as
you were at whipping." She picked up the whip. "I really ought to
give you a few whacks with this, since you seem to be so fond of
whippings. But the whip is beginning to wear out," she added and
broke off a piece of it. "Completely worn out, sad to say," she
continued, and broke the whole whip into tiny, tiny pieces.
Mr. Blomsterlund with his sack was trudging along the road without
saying a word. He only puffed a little.
And Pippi took hold of the wagon shafts and pulled the wagon home
for him.
"There, that won't cost you a cent," said she when she had
deposited the wagon outside Mr. Blomsterlund's barn. "I was glad to
do it. The trips up into the air were free too."
Then she went away. Mr. Blomsterlund stood staring after her for a
long time.
"Three cheers for Pippi," cried the children when she came
back.
Teacher too was much pleased with Pippi and praised her. "That was
well done," she said. "We should always be kind to animals-and to
people too, of course."
Pippi sat on her horse, looking perfectly satisfied. "Well, I
certainly was good to Mr. Blomsterlund, anyway," she said. "All that
flying in the air for nothing!"
"That is why we are here," said Teacher, "to be good and kind to
other people."
Pippi stood on her head on the horse's back and waved her legs in
the air. "Heigh-ho," said she, "then why are the other people