Withouthesitation,Idid.
IwasmetwiththesameglowingorbthatI'dseenwhenIsawmy parents.Butinsteadofthem,thefigureofafemalefloatedbeforeme, bathinginthegloriouslightsurroundingher.Thesightofherwas breathtaking.
“It'snotyourtimeyet,”shesaidwhileherhandlightlycaressedmy throat.“He'ssendingyouback.”Herhandshonewiththesamewhite brilliancethatpermeatedwhateverrealmwewerein.Theheatitbrought tomywoundwasn'tuncomfortableatall,thoughIhadexpecteditwould be;insteaditwaswarmandcomforting.Myeyeswerehavinggreat difficultyadaptingtothebrightnessaroundme,andIfoughthardtosee theangelofmercywhosoughttohealme.
ButI couldsee.
“Sendingmeback?”Iasked,squintinghard.
“Yes.Hesaiditisn'ttimeforyoutoleaveyet,”shereplied,leaning closertosheltermefromthelight.
“Hewho?”
“Whodoyouthink?”shechuckledwithasmileinhervoice.“You haveajobtodo,Ruby.Yoursisnotyetdone.”
Asmyeyesadaptedintheshadesheprovidedmewith,Itriedto absorbwhatshewassaying. Youhaveajobtodo.... Partofmefearedas towhatexactlythatjobwas.Theotherhalfwashappytosignonfor whatevertaskwasnecessarytoletmelive.
Sensingmyinitialuneaseatherwords,shepressedforwardfurther untilsheblockedouttheradiancealmostcompletely.IstartledatwhatI saw.Herbeautywasethereal,butmoreimportantly,itwasfamiliar.The darkhair,oliveskin,andperfectfacewerenearenoughtoconfirmmy suspicions,buttheeyessealedthedeal.Theysparkledlikefreshspring grass,lightlycoveredindew.Likeglowingemeralds.
Shelookedatmeknowinglyasthoughshecouldreadmythoughts.
“You'regoodforSean.Youbringoutasideofhimthathasn'tbeen seenbefore.Notforalong,longtime.He needsyou,Ruby.”Shewrapped herarmsaroundme,pullingmeintightlyagainsther.Theunadulterated loveandgoodnessthatresonatedfromherbroughttearstomyeyes.
NeveragainwouldIfeelsomethingthatpure,thatheavenly.“AndScarlet needsyoutoo.Theburdenyoucarryisforbothofyoutobear,andbearit youshall. Together.”Withthosewords,Ifeltanabsentbutfamiliar stirringinmymind.
Thebeasthadbeenawakened.
ShepulledawayfrommejustenoughsothatIcouldseeherface.
“Imustleaveyounow,”shewhispered,herexpressionforlorn.“I havefixedthatwhichyoucouldnotmend.Therestisuptoyou.”
IstaredupatherwithemotionsIcouldnotcomprehend.Neverin mylifehadIfeltsuchloveandpeace.Notevenfrommyparents.
“Areyou―”
“Givehimyourlove,Ruby,”shesaidbeforepullingawayagain, floatingoffquicklytowhenceshecame.“Givehimminetoo.”
Ishotofftheground,gaspingforairlikesomeonelongsubmerged underwaterhadjustbrokenthesurface.WhenIopenedmyeyes,Icould seeSeanwaitingatmyside.
“Icouldn'tgettoyou,”hesaidsoftly,caressingmythroatgently.
“Thelight...therewassomuchlight...”
“Anangel,”Iwhispered,stillstunned.“Itwasan angel.Shesaved me.”
Hisfacewentblank.
“Anangel?”heaskedwiththehopeandaweofachild.“Areyou sure?”
“Itwasyourmother,Sean,”Itoldhim,sittingmyselfuptolook himinhiseyes.“Yourmothersentmeback.”
34
Hesaidnothingafterthat.
Afterafewmomentsofstaringatmeblankly,hehelpedmestand, movingtoscoopmeupinhisarms,butIrefusedtolethimcarryme.
AlthoughIwasslightlyweakfromthebloodloss,itfeltgoodtobeable towalkonmyownagain,andIrelishedtheopportunitytodoso.With mysightreturned,thatburdenwasliftedoffmyshoulders.
Butanotherwasputuponthem.SightmeantScarlet,andScarlet meanttroublewithSean.TroubleIwasn'treadytodealwith.Hismother mayhavemendedthatwhichwasbrokenbetweenScarletandmyself physically,butshedidnothingtorestorethetrustthatwaslost―the communicationeither.Scarlet,thoughpresent,wasutterlyhiddenaway, andthistimeitwasofherownvolition.Thegrowingsenseofuneasethat Ifeltwashardtocontain.
Scarletfearednothing―orverylittle,atleast.Whatevershewas hidingfrom,consequencesorotherwise,couldnothavebeengood.I wantedtofindoutwhatshehaddonebeforeSeancouldgettoher.If damagecontrolwasneeded,itwasinmybestinteresttobefully prepared.
AsSeanandImadeourwaytothevehicle,hefilledmeinonthe highpointsofthebattlethatIhadbeentoobusydyingtobeanactive partof.He'dapparentlymadeshortworkofTobias―the realone―once hisbargainingchipwastakenoutoftheequation.Tobyreallyhadbeena cleverlittlebugger,organizingeverythingthathadhappenedtous,from theplannedbattleinBostontotheambushatmyapartmentthatledusto believethatallwassafe.Seandidn'tsaymuchabouthowhegotthat informationfromTobiasbeforehedied,butI'msureitwasbothcreative andexcruciatinglypainful.IwassorryImissedthat,thoughIdoubted Seanwas.Hedidn'twantmetoseehiminaction.Hewasstillsensitive aboutmeseeingwhathewascapableof.
Whohewascapableofbeing.
Tochangethesubject,Iaskedhowmyboysweredoing.Sean becameslightlyguardedatmerementionofthem,informingmethatJay andthebrothershadroundedthemupandtakenthembacktothefirst floorofSean'sbuilding.Theyhadtofigureoutwhatneededtobedone withthem.HavingbeentoonlythesecondandthirdfloorsofSean's place,Iwasalittleconcernedaboutwhatexactlyhehadsetuponthe floorIhadn'tyetseen.
Iwantedtoaskhimoncewegotinthecar,butIfoundmyselfata lossforwords,and,apparentlyhewastoo.Nearlytheentiredrivehome wasspentincompletesilencewithonlythehumoftheBMW'smotorto offersomeauditorystimulation.Icaughthimlookingatmetwiceoutof thecornerofmyeye,butIcouldn'treadhisexpression.Disbelief, jealousy,love―theywereallintheresomewhere,butchangedtoo rapidlytotellforsurewhichonedominated,orwhotheyappliedto.
Aswepulledintotown,Seanwasthefirsttobreakthequiet betweenus.
“Wheredoyouwanttogo?”heasked,eyesstillfocusedonthe road.
Ihesitatedslightlybeforeanswering.Itwasaterriblyloaded question.Turningtofacehim,Iwhisperedthreesimplewordsthattold himeverythinghecouldhaveeverwantedtoknow.
“Whereveryouare.”
Hismouthpressedintoathinlineinresponse.
“ThenmightIsuggestnotdraggingyourthroatacrossabladelike thateveragain?”hesaid,withtheslightestedgeofhostility.“BecauseI cannotfollowyouwhenyouare dead. ”Aninkyblackpervadedhisirises, swallowingwhateverlightwaspresentinthedimlylitvehicle.“Not easily...”
“I'msorry―”
“Iknowyouare,Ruby,”hesaid,takingmyhandinhis.“AndI knowwhyyoudidit,soletmemakesomethingverycleartoyouright now.Never,underanycircumstances,areyoutodo anythingthat sacrificesyourwell-beingformineoranyoneelse's.Doyouhearme?”
Inoddedsilently.
“Sayit.Outloud.”
“Iwon'tsacrificemyselfforyouoranyoneelseIlove,”Imumbled, knowingthatitwasn'tentirelytrue.
“Itwillnevercometothat...”hewhisperedsoberlybeforequickly composinghimself.“Promisemeyouwon't.”
“Ipromise.”
Hisblackeyessearchedmineuntilhewassatisfiedwithwhathe saw,thenturnedbacktowatchtheroadaswenearedhisapartment.
“IhavetodealwiththeboyswhenIgethome.Areyousureyou wanttogo?Youmaynotlikewhatyousee,”hesaidhesitantly.Hewas invitingmeintoPCbusiness―somethinghe'dneverdonebefore.Itwas anolivebranchofsorts,andIwasdamnsureIwasgoingtotakeit.Iwas worriedaboutwhatwasgoingtohappentoTobias'packmembers―if therewereanyofthemstillbre
athing―especiallyJanner,Ali,andBecks.
Ididn'twanttobelieveCooperwasintrouble,butIjustcouldn'tbesure thathewasoutofharm'swayeither.Ineededtoseeformyself.
Weparkedthecararoundbackandtookanentirelydifferentroute intothebuilding.I'dneverknownitexisted.Itledtoanarrow,darkened tunnelthatendedinasmallstaircase.Attheendofthatwasasingledoor madeofthickreinforcedsteel.Theimplicationswerenotpleasantfor whatIwouldfindinside.
Withoutaword,Seanunlockedthedoorwithasecuritycodeand swungitopenforme.IfrozewhenIlookedinside.Rowsofcellsfully equippedwithmetalbars―betterdescribedasbeamsduetotheir extremethickness―welcomedmeintotheroom.Itwasajailforthe supernatural,andoccupyingthosecellswereallthosewhoremained fromtheoldVictorianoutsideoftown.Bythelooksofit,notmanymade itoutalive.
ThatthoughtrattledmeandIquicklysearchedforthefacesI neededtosee.InthecellclosesttomewasJanner,andbesidehimwas Becks.FurtherdownwasamanIdidn'trecognize,thenanother,then Cooper―they'dchainedhimtothefloorforgoodmeasure.Icouldonly imaginethefightheputuponcehesnappedoutofTobias'hold.
Iwrenchedmyheadaround,tryingtolocateanyothersurvivors,but couldn'tseeanyoneelsefrommyvantagepoint.WhenItriedtostepinto theroomtolookmoreclosely,Iwasstoppedshortbyahandaroundmy wrist.
“Notyet,”Seanwarned.“We'renotsurewhat'struthandwhat's illusionatthispoint.Wedon'tknowthattheeffectshavewornoffyet,or ifthey'lleverwearoffatall.I'mnotlettingyounearthemuntilIknow forsure.”
“ButAlistair.Idon'tseehim.Whereishe?”
“Heisn'there,Ruby,”Jannercalledout,hisvoiceassaddenedas theenergythatlazilyfloatedmydirection.Hewasdevastated.
“Where?Whereishe?”Iasked,lookingtoSeanfortheanswersI didn'thave.I'dmissedsomuchwhilebeinghealedbyhismother.
Apparentlytoomuch.
“Hewasreallybadlyhurt,”Seanreplied,hisvoicelowand controlled.“Heisn'there.”
“How?Whohurthim?”
Sean'sgripflinchedeversoslightlyatmyfinalquestion,andmy heartsank.IfSeanwastheonetoharmhim,thenIdoubtedthattherewas muchleftintactwhenhewasthrough.
“Whatdidyoudo,Sean?”Iasked,lookingathimwithtear-filled eyes.
“WhatIhadto.”
Igulpedhardagainstthesobthreateningtoescape.DeepdownI knewthattheboysnevermeanttoharmme.Tobiashadbeenusingthem aspawnsforalongtimetodohisbidding,andcollectingmewasjust anotherplayinhisultimatequestforpower.TheenergyIfeltfromthem thatnightwasasguardedandwalledoffasever.Tobiaswasworking hardtokeepthemincheck.ButIhadfeltthemwhenthatenergywas down,andinthosemoments,Iknewthattheywereauthenticand genuine.ThosewerethemenIfearedfor―themenIcaredabout.
“Sean,”Istarted,tryinghardtokeepmyemotionsincheck.“Where isAlinow?”
“Upstairs.Inmyapartment.”
Notgivinghimachancetosayanythingelse,Iboltedforthedoor, andsurprisingly,nobodymovedtostopme.NotevenSean.
Iflewthroughtheoutsidedoorandtorearoundtothefrontofthe building.Takingthreestepsatatime,Ireachedthethirdfloorinseconds andslammedtheeight-digitcodeintothekeypad.Theseconditbeeped approval,Ifaltered.WhatexactlywasIgoingtowalkinonandfind?
Seanwouldn'thavelefthimthereunlesstherewasnothreatfromhim, andmyguesswasthatifhewasbreathing,he'dhavebeenperceivedasa liability.
IgnoringtherisingpanicIfelt,Ienteredthevastspacetoan unexpectedscene.Jaystood,heavilyarmed,hoveringoverthe couch―anditsbarelybreathingoccupant.
“Ali!”Iscreamed,divingtowardshim.“OhmyGod,you'realive!”
“Easy,Ruby,”Jaysaid,stoppingmejustbeforeIcouldgetto Alistair.“Don'ttouchhim.It'llonlymakeitworse.”
“But...butwhy?Icanhelphimheal,Jay.Ijustneedtobeclose enough.”
“Ruby,”Jaysnapped,spinningmebymyshoulderstofacehim.
“He'sfullofsilver.Nothingyoucandowillstopthis.You'llonlyprolong hissuffering.”
“Thenwhydon'tyoujustputhimoutofhismisery?”Isnapped back,thinkingthatJaywasdoingexactlywhatheaccusedmeofdoing.
“Answers,”herepliedcoolly.“Seanwantsanswers.”
BeforeIcouldevenbegintosharemythoughtsonhisanswer,a voicedistractedme.
“Ruby?”Alistaircalledtome.“I'msosorry.Youhavetoknow that―”
“Iknowyoudidn'tmeanto,”Ireplied,chokingbackmytears.He didn'tneedtoseemefallapart.Heneededmetoholdmyshittogether.
“Justlaystill,please.I'mgoingtofiguresomethingout.Justrest.Save yourenergy.”
IstaredJaydownhard,knowingIwaslikelyabouttostartafight.
“Whyisn'tPeytahere?”Igrowled.
“Seanwon'tlethernearthem.”Hisexpressionwasunfazedbymy mentionofthesprite-likegirlthathe'donceloved.Likelystillloved.
“We'llseeaboutthat,”Isnarledbeforestormingoutoftheroom.
IwasinthebasementbeforeIknewit,rememberingnothingofmy tripthere.Iwasonamission,andmyragewasgrowing.Alistairwasn't goingtodiethatway.NotifI,orPeyta,couldhelpit.
“Sean!”Iscreameddownthenarrowcorridor.
Heemergedimmediately.
“Shecan'tcomehere,”hestarted,knowingexactlywhatIwasabout todemand.
“Ican'tlethimdielikethis,Sean.”
“Iknowit'shard,Ruby,butthere'snothingtobedone.”
“Goddammit!”Ishouted,slammingmyfistintothewall,breaking afewbonesagainstthecinderblockformyefforts.
“I'msorry,”hewhispered,movinginonme.
“NO!”Ispat.“Notnow.Ican'tdealwiththisnow,Sean.You pepperedhimfullofsilver!”
“IdidwhatIhadtodotokeepTobiasfromescaping.Heusedthem likeshields,Ruby,”hegrowled,eyesdarkening.“Itwasachoicebetween takingAlidownorCooper.Wouldyouhavepreferredthealternative?”
Myheartstoppedcold.“Ididn'tthinkso.”
“Letmecallher,Sean,please.Ifshewantstodothis,willyoulet her?Willyouletherhelphimifyou'retherewithher?Jaytoo?Hell,all ofyoucanbetheretokeephersafe,Idon'tcare.Whatwillittake?”
Atsomepointinmyrant,thetearsbrokefree,andItastedthesalty sadnessastheyrolledovermylips.Hisexpressiongrewincreasingly pained.
Isnatchedthephoneheofferedmeoutofhishandlikeagreedy childanddialedher.Sheansweredrightaway.
“Sean?What'swrong?”
“Peyta,it'sme.It'soneofthenewguys,Alistair.He'sdying.They usedsilveronhim.He'llneverhealitonhisown,”Icried,unableto controlmyoverwhelmingemotions.“Canyouhelphim?”
Shepausedforonlyabriefmomentbeforeanswering.
“Yes.Ofcourse.I'llberightthere.”
“I'matSean'splace.”
“Okay.Thereinfive.”
Itwasthelongestfiveminutesofmylife.
35
“He'salive,”IyelledouttoJannerandtheothersbeforepushingpast Seantoseethem.Disregardinghisearlierwarning,Iwalkedstraightinto theprison-likeroomandovertoCooper.Mindcontrolornot,Ihadtosee him.
WhenIarrivedathiscell,hehadhisbacktome,stillsittingonthe floorandshackledtoit.Isatdownnexttothebarsandtriedtoreachhim throughthem,buthewastoofaraway.Andhewouldn'tlookatme.
“Coop?”Icalledsoftly,lettingmyvoicetellhimeverythingwasall right.“Cooper,it'sme.I'mfine.Please...”
Buthewouldn'trespond.Istartedtogetanxiousandevenbacked awayfromthecellslightly,wonderingifmaybeTobias'littleexperiment hadpermanentlydamagedhim.Ormaybehehadn'tsnappedoutofitat all.
“Cooper,answerme. Now,”Iordered,tryingtoquashthefear threateningtoovertakeme.“Ineedtoknowyou'reokay.Thatyou're you again.”
Withhisheadhunglow,heturnedtomeslowly,lookingeverybit asdejectedasheclearlyfelt.HiseyesweresofilledwithsorrowthatI couldbarelystandtolookdirectlyintothem.Thenthewaveofguiltand sadnessslammedintome,andInearlyfelloverfromtheassault.
“Cooper,”Isaid,reachingforhimonceagain.“Iknowitwasn'tyou backthere.YouhavetoknowthatIknowthat.Youneverwouldhurtme orallowmetobehurt.”
“ButIdid,Ruby,”hereplied,turninghisgazetothefloor.“That's exactlywhatIdid.Ifailedyou...”
“Butitwasn'tyourfault.”
Heignoredme.
“Sean.Please.Can'twelethimout?”
“Istillcan'triskit,Ruby.”
“He'sright,Rubes.It'stoochancy.”
Isighed,knowingthatIwasn'tgoingtobeabletobudgeeitherof themontheissueuntilwehadanswers.
“Fine,”Isnipped,lookingbackintoCooper'scell.“ThenI'm comingin.”
IstoodandmarchedtowardSean,hellbentontakingthekeysfrom him,butthesoundofthehallwayentranceopeningwaylaidmycourseof action.
“Peyta!”
Isprinteddownthehalltomeether,whiskingherbackoutsideand aroundtothefront,thenupthestairstoSean'sapartment.Jayheardus comingandopenedthedoortomeetus.IfeltPeytafreezebesideme whenshesawhim.Jaylookedimpassive,butIfeltthesurgeofemotions thatseeingPeytabroughtoutofhim.Hereallydidloveher.
“Thereisn'tmuchtime,”hetoldus,leadingthewaytothecouch.
Jaywasright.Ali'sbreathingwasmoreofashallowandfeeble panting―hiscolorpaleandsallow.Alightdewcoveredhimand glistenedinthemoonlightpouringinthroughthevastwallofwindows nearthecouch.Hehadminutesleftatbest.
Withoutfurtherprovocation,PeytawasbyAli'ssideassessingthe situationlikeapro.Itwasaproudandsadmomentforme.Shewas tryingtoembracehercalling,butIwishedshedidn'thaveto.Theprice shepaidwastoohigh.