“So, you’re not coming with me?”
“Hell, no. You’re going to get caught. And then you’re going to be in serious trouble. There’s no way out of here. Ever.”
Panama went back to her makeup. Kanika wanted to cry. But she held back her tears as she left Panama’s room. She thought it would probably be the last time they would see each other. How did it come to this?
Chapter 17
Witness
Panama’s decision made Kanika sad. But she had to think about herself. When she got back to her room, Ru had her things tossed across the bed.
“What are you doing?”
“You can’t take this stuff, stupid. You can’t take anything that Dragon bought you.”
Ru began placing the clothes back in the drawers. Kanika grabbed a few ordinary rags that she’d bought for herself. Ru put them in the bag.
“And don’t forget your money,” Ru said.
How did Ru know she had money? Kanika forced a puzzled look.
Ru laughed. “Oh, you think I don’t know you have money stashed away? I almost told on you a few times. But I felt sorry for you. You were so desperate.”
“How did you know?”
“That old man always tips big. I’m the only one who knows, though. He always asks for a type. He likes chocolate girls, and the rest of the girls here don’t fit. But, Kanika, it doesn’t take long to catch on to anything around here. If those girls found out, they would run and tell right away. They would be happy to tell Dragon you’ve been stashing money just so they can watch you get your face punched off.”
“That’s why I need to get the hell out of here, Ru. Thank you for helping me.”
“No, this is all you, girl. If you get to Nova Scotia, that’s all on you. And if you get caught, that’s all on you, too. If my name ever comes out of your mouth as having helped you, that’ll be the last word you ever speak. You got that?”
Kanika nodded her head. The last thing she wanted was to get Ru in trouble. She had already opened her mouth to Panama. She prayed Panama wouldn’t repeat Ru’s name to anyone.
Ru was taking a huge risk to help her and Kanika knew it. Ru told her she had convinced everyone she was taking Kanika along to see a trick who wanted two black girls. They slipped out of the house and were soon driving through the city. Ru gave Kanika advice on how to stay safe in the streets.
“I’m going to get out at the next block,” said Ru as they reached a corner. “So you’ll be on your own from here. I’ve done all I can for you. Just remember everything I told you, okay?”
Kanika nodded. All of a sudden she was nervous. Without Ru, she wasn’t sure she would be able to make it out of Toronto safely. She didn’t know the streets like Ru did. And she had no idea how much time she had before Dragon realized she was gone and came looking for her. Soon, the car turned onto the next block. Kanika’s heart pounded.
“You’ll be fine.” Ru smiled as she exited the taxi.
But as soon as Ru stepped out, three men appeared out of nowhere. It was Dragon and the two men who had driven Kanika and Crystal to Toronto. They were standing over Ru. Ru gasped loudly. Kanika screamed as she felt Ru’s body get slammed against the taxi. Ru pounded her fist on the taxi’s roof.
“Go! Go!” she yelled to the driver. But the driver saw Dragon pull back his jacket to reveal a gun. The taxi driver’s hands stopped dead, like they were frozen to the wheel of the car.
“Move!” Kanika shouted at the driver from the back seat. Fear crippled every inch of her body.
Kanika could see through the windows of the taxi, which was still not moving. The balding man grabbed Ru and pulled her into the alley. Ru fought him all the way, but he overpowered her. Dragon and the blond ponytailed man stood with their eyes on the taxi driver.
“Get out!” Dragon growled at Kanika.
Kanika shook as she got out of the taxi. This is going to be where I die, she thought.
“Hey, who the hell is gonna pay me!?” the taxi driver yelled.
Dragon fired a shot in the air. The taxi squealed away from the curb. Kanika realized her bag was still in the back of the taxi. In it was all the money she had saved. She was right back to where she started. She was scared, embarrassed and out of hope. She was too afraid to look at Dragon.
“You want me to take care of this ho, Dragon?” the balding man called from the alley. Ru was still struggling to get free from his grip.
“Yeah, take care of her,” Dragon ordered.
“Go ahead, do it! You crappy piece of shit!” Ru spit in the balding man’s face. He fired a single shot at Ru. Kanika screamed as she watched Ru crumple to the ground.
The ponytailed man grabbed Kanika by the arm and pushed her down the sidewalk. “You’re next!” he shouted.
Kanika looked up at the black sky. Her mother must have felt like this when she was killed in the hotel. She must have felt this horror, this panic. Kanika shook at the thought of her life ending the same way.
“Don’t kill this one,” Dragon said. “She needs to make up for my money she didn’t make while she was faking sick!” Dragon squeezed Kanika’s face so hard she thought her teeth would pop out.
“You let Ru get in your damn head,” Dragon said to Kanika. “So listen to my words carefully. You can never get away from me. Ever. You don’t know who I know, or what I know. And the next time you try to pull shit like this, you can say goodbye to your little brown face.” Dragon pushed her back toward the ponytailed man.
“Mess her up, then put her to work,” Dragon ordered. “I’d do it myself, but I’m too pissed off. If I put my hands on her right now, you’d be scraping her narrow Black ass off the street too. Take her to the hotel. I have a trick lined up and waiting.”
The ponytailed man dragged Kanika around the corner to his car. Just before she stepped in, he punched her in the face. Kanika screamed. Then he jabbed her in the ribs. Kanika could feel the crack of her bones as they broke. While the man was pounding on her, all Kanika could think of was Ru’s bloodied body lying in the alley. That image stuck in her head. It made her refuse to cry. Through her haze, she could see Dragon disappear into the alley where Ru’s body was. Then Kanika passed out in the back seat of the car.
When they arrived at the hotel, the ponytailed man poured cold bottled water over Kanika’s face. It jarred her awake. He yelled at her to clean herself up.
“And don’t try anything stupid,” he added. “Go to room one hundred and one. I’ll be sitting here when you come out.”
Kanika felt trapped. She couldn’t call for help or get to the police. Her body ached as she got out of the car. She thought about what she had witnessed. Does Ru have family? Will they ever know she has been killed in a lonely alley by a monster? she wondered.
Kanika wiped the tears from her eyes and walked into the hotel. Maybe Panama was right. Maybe this hell was for life.
Chapter 18
Last Chance
“Bitches come and bitches go,” Dragon said.
The girls kept asking about Ru, but no one ever got a real answer. Every day, Kanika would comb the papers. She hoped to find an article about a missing woman matching Ru’s description. Or a news story about her body being found. But after some time, Kanika was quietly starting to give up hope.
“You girls know you’re a dime a dozen.” Dragon stood in the middle of the floor. He was finally giving some answers about Ru. “Your girl, she went and got her ass shot off by a trick.”
The girls gasped. Some of them screamed and cried out loud. Kanika shook with frustration at Dragon’s lie.
But Dragon wasn’t finished. He said, “So now I’m on the hunt for two more bitches. I need to replace Brittany and Ru. Both of them betrayed me and left me in a bad spot. You girls need to step up your game until I can get some new fire up in here.”
Kanika watched him walk out.
There was no remorse, no regret. He was cold and uncaring. He was a liar who cared about no one.
Kanika listened as the girls wept and shook their heads, saying, “poor Ru.” If only they knew what really happened. Kanika hated Dragon. She couldn’t stop the tears from pouring out. It was hard to keep the truth from the other girls. But she didn’t dare tell the truth, not even to Panama. Instead, Kanika kept it all inside.
One night, Panama and Kanika had just returned home. They were hungrily munching on leftover chicken. Kanika decided to talk to Panama again about leaving.
“It’s not as easy as that, Kanika,” Panama replied.
“All we need to do is stick together. I know we can make it home.”
“You didn’t learn your lesson from the last time?”
“Are you happy here, Panama? Do you want this life?”
“Of course not!”
“So why won’t you leave?”
“Do you think my parents will love me now? They won’t ever have anything to do with me again once they find out what I’ve been doing here. Be real, Kanika. They can never find out about this.”
“I like to think our families would understand.”
“You think Aunt Becky will take you back? Not my family. Never. So stop talking about going home. Please. It’s not home for me anymore.”
Kanika didn’t know what to say. She was on her own. She would have to try to make her way back to Nova Scotia alone.
Just then, Shay, a new girl, came rushing into the kitchen.
“You guys hear the news?” she panted.
“No,” Panama answered.
“Dragon’s mother was in the hospital for an operation. And she didn’t survive the surgery.”
“Really?” Kanika looked up. She wondered what that would mean for her.
“Dragon and Dawn are leaving in the morning for a whole week,” Shay continued. “They’re going for the funeral.”
“Going where?” Kanika asked.
“Dragon is from British Columbia. That’s where his mother died.”
No Dragon for a whole week, Kanika thought. And no Dawn. She knew the other girls would stay loyal to them. They would be happy to show him how good they could be. They would keep bringing in big dollars in his absence to prove themselves. Even Panama was a part of the rivalry between the girls, all vying for Dragon’s approval.
But Kanika knew she wasn’t like Panama anymore. She wouldn’t conform. She had no desire to please Dragon. She did what she had to do to stay alive.
Now, the chance to get out while Dragon was gone was too good to ignore.
“Poor Dragon. He must be crushed by this,” Shay moaned.
“Dragon hated his mother, you fool.” Dawn appeared in the doorway. “We’re only going because he’s named in the will. He doesn’t give a shit about the funeral.”
Kanika shook her head in disgust.
“Oh, you’re judging?” Dawn challenged her.
“No.” Kanika looked down at her plate of chicken.
Later that night, the girls heard all the threats from Dragon about how they should be while he was away. When he left, they went to bed. Kanika knew Dragon’s minions would be around to keep watch on them while he was gone. She had to be very careful every step of the way.
Kanika decided she would wait two days for the weekend to start. There were conventions going on, and it would be a busy weekend for the girls. They wouldn’t figure out right away that Kanika was gone. They would think she was just out bringing in a lot of cash.
The next day was filled with anxiety. Kanika was alone with her thoughts of escaping. But she felt like every girl in the house could read her mind and see the plans in her head. She and Panama passed the day playing cards and gluing on fake nails.
“Hold your hand still, Kanika,” Panama said as she tugged on Kanika’s thumb. She took her slow time applying the tiny brush of glue to Kanika’s narrow fingernail.
“That’s because I’m doing it right.” Panama looked up at Kanika and sneered.
Kanika realized that if she managed to escape, she might never see her best friend again. Several times she was tempted to tell Panama what she was about to do. But she talked herself out of it each time.
“There!” Panama placed the fake nail across Kanika’s thumb. Then she leaned back to admire her work. “Perfection,” she boasted.
“Yeah, it looks good,” agreed Kanika. “I guess it’s true what they say about Asians and French manicures!”
Both girls laughed.
Kanika went over the plan in her head a million times, thinking about every possible way it could go. She wanted to be sure. This time she could not get caught.
It was nearly an hour before dawn. Kanika knew it was the only time she could slip out without being seen or questioned. She took one last look around her room. She planned to leave as she came — with nothing. She also planned to never come back.
Chapter 19
The Way Home
Kanika’s fear was drowned by the deafening sound of her heart. It felt like it was beating out of her chest. She walked briskly through the empty darkness of Scarborough’s back streets. She kept looking behind her as she walked, afraid she was being followed. Each time a car passed by, she would turn her body away from the road. She tried to be as invisible as she could. She was sweating beneath her clothes and across her forehead. Her breathing was labored and heavy. She prayed she would make it to a safe place before Dragon found her.
Just when she felt she couldn’t go any further, Kanika came across a tiny hiding spot. It was between the dumpster of an abandoned apartment building and a high wooden fence. On legs that could no longer carry her, she stumbled across the overgrown shrubs and slid behind the rusted green bin. The smell of rotting food and strong urine burned her nose. But that garbage bin was her protection for the night. The thick, unkempt grass would be her bed to lie on. The fence would keep unwanted eyes from noticing her. Kanika curled up into a ball and closed her eyes.
Sleep didn’t last very long before the sun burned Kanika’s eyelids. It was early morning. She breathed a sigh of relief that she had made it through the night. But she knew there was still danger. Kanika forced her tired body up against the fence. She felt like she had been thrown from a mountain and banged against the rocks the whole way down. She had to find strength to be able to make it to safety. She didn’t have Panama to tell her she was making a dumb mistake. There was no Ru to help her get back to Nova Scotia. She was all alone.
The thought of that made her heart sink. She just wanted to be free to sleep in her own bed and hang out with her friends and fight with her aunt. Kanika felt sad that her life had come so far from normal. At first, the courage to take the first step away from the dumpster wouldn’t come. Kanika’s feet simply refused to move. Kanika had no plan. She was really scared.
A silent tear slid down her cheek and landed on her sweater. Kanika looked down at it. One tear gave way to another. Then another. Soon, she was bawling. She slid back down to the ground. Snot and tears caked her face. She wrapped her arms around her knees and drew them into her chin. No one back at the house cared where she was. No one from home would be looking for her after all this time.
If her mother was alive, Kanika was sure things would be different. Her mom would protect her from this life, from this kind of fear. “She wouldn’t want this for me,” Kanika said out loud. She wiped the mess of tears from her face. Hearing her own voice gave her enough strength to get moving.
Suddenly, Kanika heard a loud crash. She rose to her feet and peered around the garbage bin. Kanika rubbed her clouded eyes to see two men exit two cars that had collided. They began screaming at each other. Kanika remained frozen and unseen. Then one man swung a blow and knocked the other driver to the
ground. The man who was hit got back to his feet and the two started fighting violently. People began to gather. Kanika knew she had to find a way out before she was spotted. And with her luck, it would be someone who knew Dragon.
With all the power she could muster, Kanika dipped around to the back of the building. There was a path leading into a wood. She sprinted the full length of the long brick building. Once she was safely on the path and hidden by trees, she leaned against one to catch her breath. In the distance she could hear sirens headed to the brawl in the street. She thought of running back. She could grab a police officer and scream for help.
But then she remembered that Dragon had friends in the police. Some of the clients were officers. She remembered the girls coming home crying after being harassed, arrested and released, or assaulted by police. The girls would talk about being treated like a criminal, when they were the ones in need of protection. Kanika decided not to take the chance. She darted off into the woods.
The creepy path led to a busy intersection. Traffic was steady but people on foot were scarce. Kanika tried to blend in with what little walking traffic there was. She felt weird in her skin. Weird in her clothes. She felt as if everyone was giving her a strange look. She felt like they knew where she had been, what she had done and what she had seen. She felt naked and exposed.
As she forced herself along the sidewalk, Kanika noticed a tall sign for Maystone Plaza. She headed for the breakfast place in the corner of the plaza. She didn’t know what she would find there. But she hoped it might be a welcoming face that would help get her home.
Chapter 20
Trusting In Good
The diner was busy with eaters and rushing cashiers. It was filled with noisy chatter. Kanika slid into a booth with half-empty plates of food on the table. A woman with blonde hair in a ponytail skipped over to her with a smile.
“Hi, darling! Good day, isn’t it? What can I get for you this morning?”
Kanika had no purse and no money. “I’ll just have a water for now,” she said.