mouth.
19
Her breasts were small, but the nipples were quite large.
20
Though darker, they had the same multicoloring as the 21
rest of her skin. The nipples were very hard against my 22
tongue. I worked my hand down between her legs and 23
flicked my finger against the moist flesh under the mound 24
of hair.
25
“Oh God!” she hissed. “Oh no.”
26
I continued to tease and nibble until her hissing turned S 27
into a shout.
R 28
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“Oh God, oh no. Stop! Please. Too much.”
2
“You want me to stop?” I asked while still licking her 3
nipple.
4
“Please.”
5
“First I’ll count to five,” I said.
6
“Oh.”
7
“One . . .”
8
Narciss raised her head between her extended arms to 9
look down at what my hand was doing.
10
“. . . two . . .”
11
She grinned and then grimaced . . .
12
“. . . three . . .”
13
. . . and then slammed her head back on the mattress.
14
“. . . four . . .”
15
“I love you,” she whispered.
16
“What?”
17
“Please. I can’t take it.”
18
“Five.”
19
I released her and moved my teasing hand away. I stood 20
above her and she turned over on her stomach, inviting 21
me to lie down on her back.
22
23
24
“Do you hear something, Charles?”
25
I had just awakened in the dark room. Narciss was 26
standing at the window, cupping her ear toward the 27 S
pane.
28 R
I got up and went to her. It pleased me that she was still 202
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naked. I put my arm around her slender waist and she 1
draped her arm on my shoulder.
2
“Listen,” she said.
3
In the silence of night, you could barely make it out.
4
No more than a murmur, it was only audible due to the 5
proximity of my mother’s window.
6
“It’s that man again,” I said.
7
“What man?”
8
“The man who lives out in these woods some summers.
9
It’s a hobo or something. Now and then someone calls the 10
police, but they never find him. He’s crazy, and some-11
times when he drinks too much wine, he gets pretty loud.
12
He keeps his distance though. You have to listen closely 13
just to hear it at all.”
14
“Have you seen him?”
15
“No, never.”
16
“Then how do you know all of that?”
17
“I’ve found his camps and empty bottles of cheap wine.
18
Some people have seen him too, but not me.” My lies 19
were becoming too large. I knew I should let it go, but I 20
couldn’t. “We called him the Padre when I was younger, 21
because some folks said that he was preaching to the trees.
22
He seems harmless enough.”
23
I kissed Narciss and she forgot about Anniston Bennet’s 24
shouts and my lies.
25
Narciss needed to talk. She was very nervous about sur-26
rendering so completely to a man she hardly knew and S 27
told me so.
R 28
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1
“The last time I fell for a man so fast, it was all wrong,”
2
she said as I was rubbing body oil into her shoulders. “It 3
felt wonderful, but he wasn’t the man for me.”
4
“But he was right for a moment,” I argued.
5
“He was awful. He would take things from my house.”
6
“Really?”
7
“Yeah. A pearl ring, twenty dollars that I kept in a 8
cookie jar, even large things like a toaster that I kept under 9
the sink. At first I thought I was going crazy. But then one 10
day I set a paper clip on the back of my jewelry box. He 11
must have lifted the lid without noticing the pin. I knew 12
immediately that he’d taken my zircon earrings. He did it 13
three more times after that, and I broke up with him.”
14
She pulled away from my massage and lay on her back.
15
I reclined, resting my head on her small stomach.
16
“Why did you wait?” I asked. “Why didn’t you get rid 17
of him after the first time?”
18
She sat up, pushing my head down into her lap. I kissed 19
her stomach. I remember because she had a ticklish reac-20
tion and then grabbed my hair to make me stop.
21
“It was weird,” she said. “Like The Twilight Zone. I 22
knew he was doing it, but he didn’t know that I knew. I’d 23
leave money in my purse or an earring on the night table 24
and then he’d come in and do that love thing he did.”
25
“It was that good?” I asked.
26
“He was a wonderful lover,” she said. “But that wasn’t 27 S
why I kept him on for so long. It was like he was my shy 28 R
prostitute, you know? He didn’t want to feel like a whore, 204
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so I would let him steal from me and pretend that I didn’t 1
miss it.”
2
I kissed her stomach again. This time she didn’t grab 3
my hair.
4
“So then why did you finally decide to break it off ?”
5
“Because I started to change,” she said.
6
“Change how?”
7
“I don’t know if I should talk about it. I mean I don’t 8
even know you.” Narciss stroked my head then, but I re-9
frained from any more kisses.
10
“That’s okay,” I said. “I understand. We all have our se-11
crets.”
12
Really I didn’t care about Narciss’s secret sex life with 13
her gigolo. I was thinking about the man in my base-14
ment, about what the consequences might be after he got 15
out of his cell.
16
“It’s not any kind of big secret or anything,” she said.
&nbs
p; 17
“It was just that I was acting like some other person and I 18
didn’t like who that person was.”
19
“And who was that?” I asked, sitting up.
20
“I was aggressive. I made him do things and I asked him 21
questions while we were . . . were doing it. I started calling 22
him names and doing things that I never did before.”
23
“What kind of things?”
24
She had finally caught my interest.
25
“I have to go to the bathroom.” She stood up and 26
walked out of my mother’s door.
S 27
I went to the window and cupped my ear to the pane.
R 28
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1
It could have been a moose, maybe five miles distant.
2
That’s what I could have said.
3
I was tired and almost scared of what I had done to An-4
niston Bennet. I wondered if he had a strong heart — if 5
the stressful time in my basement might kill him. I wanted 6
to run down while Narciss was in the toilet and make sure 7
that the prisoner wasn’t dying. But then I thought that 8
Bennet’s death would make everything easier. No one 9
knew where he was, he said. I could just put him in the 10
ground in my family’s plot. If no one was looking for 11
him, he’d never be found. For a brief moment I consid-12
ered leaving him down there until he died of starvation. If 13
he died he couldn’t get back at me.
14
When I realized that I was contemplating murder, I 15
backed away from the window.
16
“Did you see him?” Narciss said from behind.
17
“No. No.”
18
“Then why’d you jump away from the window like 19
that?”
20
“I just remembered something. I have to go into the 21
city tomorrow for a meeting. I thought it was the day af-22
ter, but I just realized that I got confused.”
23
“Oh.” There was disappointment in Narciss’s voice.
24
“How will I get back to my car?”
25
“Don’t worry about that,” I said. “I’ll give you a ride to 26
your car when we get up.”
27 S
“Oh.” She hesitated. “I thought you were trying to get 28 R
rid of me now.”
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“Why would you think that? You think I’d kick you out 1
of my house in the middle of the night?”
2
“You’ve been so restless,” she said. “I thought you 3
wanted to be alone.”
4
It was then that I realized what had happened to me.
5
Really, what had happened to the world around me. Be-6
fore Anniston Bennet had come into my life, I was invis-7
ible, moving silently among the people of the Harbor. No 8
one wondered about me; no one questioned me. Even my 9
best friends simply accepted what they saw. The card-10
player with a sharp tongue who couldn’t back up half the 11
things he said. The petty thief, the man across the street, 12
dead Samuel’s son. I might as well have been a tree at the 13
end of the block. People saw me well enough to walk 14
around, but that was just about it.
15
And for my part I treated everything and everyone 16
around me in the same way. I could put a name on 17
them, maybe. But I rarely touched or spoke a meaning-18
ful word to a soul. Weeks could go by and not one worth-19
while piece of information would pass between me 20
and another human being. The only chance I had at inti-21
macy was with Clarance and Cat, but 90 percent of 22
my time with them was spent under the influence of al-23
cohol.
24
But now everything was different — half different, 25
really. Still nobody saw me. The people at Curry’s bar in 26
East Hampton, people on the street in the Harbor. Bethany S 27
and Narciss saw something that was like me — an image R 28
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Walter Mosley
1
of what I thought I wanted to be — but they had no idea 2
what was on my mind.
3
What had changed was what I saw. It was as if 4
everybody had become like a mirror, and I saw reflections 5
of what they saw instead of what it was they were trying 6
to show me or tell me. Narciss had become a mirror and 7
an echo chamber, giving me back every word uttered and 8
gesture made. And when I saw or heard something I 9
didn’t like, I had the chance to alter my behavior.
10
“No, baby,” I said. “Not at all. I want to see you. I want 11
you here. It’s just that there’s been so much on my mind, 12
and I feel so comfortable with you that I kind of sink into 13
it, if you know what I mean.”
14
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
15
But her nipples were tightening again, and I was feeling 16
the beginnings of another erection.
17
“Let’s go to bed,” I said. I could have been an actor in 18
an old black-and-white movie. An airplane ace or inter-19
20
She was in the movie too, and happy with her role. Arm 21
in arm we walked back to the bed, moving together like 22
choreographed dancers. Every kiss hit its mark and every 23
breath was on cue.
24
25
26
27 S
28 R
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1
2
3
4
25
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
Anniston Bennet stopped shouting sometime the next C 14
morning. After driving Narciss to her car, I went down to 15
the hatch and listened, but there wasn’t a murmur or 16
sound. At first I thought about going in and checking on 17
him, but then I decided that I should stick to my guns 18
and make him wait the full ninety-six hours. I figured 19
that he was still going to be mad no matter what, so I 20
might as well do something worth him being mad.
21
I spent almost all of the next three days away from the 22
house. The first night I hung out at Curry’s bar, lying 23
about my business and drinking up a storm. In the morn-24
ing I got up early and started worrying about the sergeant 25
that Bennet had slaughtered in North Vietnam.
26
But we aren’t in Vietnam, I said to myself.
S 27
R 28
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1
But he is a killer, I answered.
2
That morning I had made a date to go horseback riding 3
for the first time in my life. I’d met a young white couple 4
named Jodie and Byron. They were wealthy and invited 5
me to come riding with them. I said that I’d never ridden 6
before, but they promised that they’d show me how.
7
They had a girl they wanted me to meet. Extine was her 8
name. She took me, along with Jodie and Byron, on a trip 9
in woods around Southampton that I had never seen.
10
Every inch of those woods is etched in my memory by the 11
pain that saddle inflicted.
12
Jodie and Extine were cousins. Byron was Jodie’s hus-13
band. They lived in the Hamptons every summer and fall 14
and then spent the rest of the year between Aspen and 15
Maui. Their money came from their parents. Who knows 16
where it was before that?
17
Extine had big blond hair and big teeth that she pre-18
sented in a permanent smile.
19
Extine loved horses. She told me that she had ridden 20
every day of her life since the age of twelve.
21
“I love horses’ hair and teeth and eyes,” she told me two 22
minutes after we met. “When I was a girl I’d sneak out of 23
the house at night to sleep in the stables with my mare.”
24
“It’s great that you had something like that,” I said. “I 25
know a lot of people who never had something that they 26
loved so much.”
27 S
I was thinking about myself — about how I had wan-28 R
dered in and out of the same front door for thirty-three 210
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years without ever knowing which way I should have been 1
going.
2
“Boy just like a housefly,” Uncle Brent used to say. “So 3
busy buzzin’ he don’t see the wall till it smack him upside 4
the head.”
5
“You don’t think I’m crazy?” Extine asked with a sort of 6
wonderment in her voice.
7
“I guess you could say that you were crazy,” I said. “I 8
mean crazy basically means that you’re different from 9
everybody else, and since you know what you want and 10