Praise for The Leap of Your Life
“A must read for anyone who knows there's a larger life out there for them and is ready to create it!”
—Mark A. Lack, TV Host and Speaker
“There's a lot of noise out there telling you what to do, and how to do it. Unfortunately, few people out there are living it. Tommy Baker is, and The Leap of Your Life will give you permission to take ownership of your life and never look back.”
—Ryan Michler, Founder of Order of Man
“If you're ready to make that change, that shift, that decision that you know will change your life, but you don't know where to start, Tommy Baker is your answer. Tommy will guide and direct you through The Leap of Your Life. Stop waiting for your success, grab this opportunity to be guided by one of the best in the business. Leap!”
—Jay Nixon, Founder, Thrive Fitness
THE
LEAP
OF YOUR LIFE
HOW TO REDEFINE RISK, QUIT
WAITING FOR “SOMEDAY,” AND
LIVE BOLDLY
TOMMY BAKER
Cover image: © technotr/iStockphoto
Cover design: Wiley
Copyright © 2019 by John Wiley & Sons, Inc. All rights reserved.
Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.
Published simultaneously in Canada.
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ISBN 9781119552536 (Hardcover)
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ISBN 9781119552437 (ePub)
For both of my incredible grandmothers, Marjorie and Pepita. For
giving me the gift of knowledge, and the belief of possibility.
CONTENTS
Cover
Praise for The Leap of Your Life
Introduction
Part I Leaning on the Edge Chapter 1 Daring to Dream The Dream of a Lifetime
You Have a Quest to Take, Too
December 31, 2014—10:36 p.m. New York, New York
The Edge Is Your Invitation
How You Get There Matters Less Than Getting There
You’re Here for a Reason and It’s Time to Unleash It
Insight Is Overrated—You Already Know What to Do
Notes
Chapter 2 What’s Holding You Back? Fear Has Taken Control of Your Life
Stop Trying to Eradicate Fear
Release the Conditions
Pull Up a Seat, Fear Is Here to Stay
The Unknown Is Calling, but You’re Not Listening
Reframe: The Unknown Is Where the Magic Happens
Reframe: Judgment Is a Mirror
Notes
Chapter 3 Life, Unlived The Greatest Price You’ll Ever Pay
Understanding Regret
Don’t Miss Your Window
Using Regret as Leverage
Flip the Script and Choose Something New
There Is No Loss in Going for It
Notes
No Risk, No Magic, No Riveting Story
Flip the Script and Change the Rules
The Greatest Risk of All
Notes
Part I Turning Point: Letting Go
Part II Before Your Journey Chapter 5 Know Yourself Ignorance Isn’t Bliss; It’s Painful
Step 1: Cultivate Your Life Philosophy
Step 2: Identifying Your Core Principles (or Values)
Step 3: Developing Emotional Intelligence and Resilience
Step 4: Radical Self-Assessment
Step 5: Examining and Reframing Your Stories
Your Leap Is the Direct Path to Know Yourself
Note
Chapter 6 Release the Noise You Already Know What to Do
You Don’t Discover Anything . . . You Allow It
Less Is More
The Closet Principle
Step 1: Take Inventory
Step 2: Delete, Delete, Delete
Step 3: Examine Your Environment
Step 4: Tune into the Signal
Tuning Out to Tune Back In
Notes
Chapter 7 Light Your Life on Fire Step 1: Create Clarity Around Your Purpose
Step 2: Identify What Lights You Up Inside
Step 3: Take Inventory of Your Key Skills
Step 4: Examine the Marketplace and Their Needs
Step 5: Construct Your One-Liner
Mastery Creates Meaning
Your Skill Game Plan
Putting It All Together
Notes
Chapter 8 Crafting the Vision The Voice on the Inside Must Be Loud
Plant the Seed and Let the Universe Do Its Thing
Vision Boards Don’t Work, or Do They?
Vision Pillar 1: Relentless Clarity
Vision Pillar 2: Undeniable Belief
Vision Pillar 3: Consistent Action (Collapse Reality)
Vision Pillar 4: Intense Focus
Vision Pillar 5: Cultivating Patience
Vision Pillar 6: Total Surrender [–$137.67 Available]
Your Vison Is Your Compass
Notes
Chapter 9 Embrace Your Moment Chronos, Kairos, and the Feeling
Other Key Ingredients to Define Your Moment
My Moment (Back in New York)
Don’t Let Your Moment Become a Video Game
Step 1: Declare Like Your Life Depends on It
Step 2: Commit with Mind, Body, and Spirit
Step 3: Execute Immediately or Else
Step 4: You Are All In, Act Like It
Don’t Miss Your Moment (It
May Never Come Back)
Tomorrow, Everything Changes
Bridging the Gap
Notes
Part III The Leap of Your Life Chapter 10 The Business Leap (Purpose, Unleashed) Your Business Leap Will Impact Your Entire Experience
The Strongest Anchor Out There
The Excitement Test
Types of Business Leaps
They’re Waiting for You
Eradicate Your Excuses … Start Now
Business Is an Endless Series of Leaps
Notes
Chapter 11 The Physical Leap (Vitality on Fire) Who It’s For
Waking Up to a Health Crisis
A Deeper Reason for a Powerful Result
What Your Physical Leap Will Reveal
The Spirit of Kokoro
Types of Physical Leaps
How to Create Your Own
If You Do This Right, You May Never Be the Same
Notes
Chapter 12 The Spiritual Leap (Disconnect to Reconnect) Destination Nowhere (Except Inward)
Who It’s For
The Greatest Quest
I Don’t Have Time for This Stuff
Types of Spiritual Leaps
What’s (Always) in the Way
Practical Tools for Your Spiritual Leap
Your Spiritual Leap
Notes
Chapter 13 The Connection Leap (Love Out Loud) Not All Sunshine and Rainbows
Who It’s For
Waking Up Alone
Self-Love Is the New Black
The Benefits
Types of Connection Leaps
What Gets in the Way
Be the Leader with Vulnerability
Put Yourself on the Line
Notes
Part III Turning Point: The Leapof Your Life
Part IV Coming Home Chapter 14 Brave New World You Will Never Be the Same (Act Like It)
Learn to Love Duality
Make Your Success as Automatic as You Can
Leap Habit 1: Reaffirm Your Vision Daily
Leap Habit 2: Take One (Purposeful) Step
Leap Habit 3: Create Space to Reflect
Leap Habit 4: Cultivate Faith and Trust
Leap Habit 5: Practice Deletion
Ask the (Right) Questions
Bulletproof Your Leap
Notes
Chapter 15 The Evolution of You The Oasis Is a Myth (but Life Is Still Amazing)
Breakthrough Isn’t the End, It’s the Start
Always Sit in the Front of the Class of Life (Leaders Are Learners)
The Beautiful Dance
One Year’s Worth of Results in 90 Days
“You’ve Changed.”
Find Your People
What Not to Do (and What to Do)
You, Inc.
Note
Chapter 16 Your Declaration The Time Is Now
June 11, 2018,San Sebastian, Spain, 10:09 a.m.
Your Declaration
The Leap of Your Life
The Pen Is Full of Ink, Now Go Write Your Story
Resources
Acknowledgments
Index
End User License Agreement
List of Illustrations
Chapter 2 Figure 2.1 Fear is your compass.
Chapter 3 Figure 3.1 My favorite “Today I F****d Up” post on Reddit.
Chapter 7 Figure 7.1 Purpose, passion, skills, and marketplace needs come together to create your on...
Chapter 8 Figure 8.1 Framework for making decisions about your future.
Chapter 10 Figure 10.1 The key of alignment.
Introduction
What are you waiting for?
There’s a leap in your life you’ve been putting off, and it’s killing you. Maybe not literally, but it’s killing your spirit. It’s killing your belief, your enthusiasm, and the thrill of this one experience we call life. It’s killing your energy, vitality, and hope for the future. When those are gone, you might as well be the walking dead.
It’s draining your life force, and every day you put it off, you’re reminded of how it hasn’t happened for you yet. And now you’re questioning if it ever will.
The consequences of not taking your leap are real, and they stare back at you every morning in the mirror. They’re reflected in bank statements. They’re felt in your body language during time with the people you love. They’re wrapped in not on long exhales as you aim to keep it all together.
But worst of all, they’re reflected in this tireless voice in the back of your head that won’t shut up, asking:
“Is this it? Is this all that’s meant for me?”
Now, does this mean I’m certain your life isn’t working? No, not at all. Our lives can be working, and we can still have a leap we know we must take. Sometimes, this can be the most precarious circumstance of all: we have everything we’ve been told we should want, yet something is still missing.
And I’m here to tell you what’s missing is your leap. But before we get into it all, let’s define what a leap is.
The Ingredients of the Leap
You may be wondering: What exactly constitutes a leap? You may be thinking it’s abandoning Western life and moving to an ashram in the Himalayas, quitting your accounting gig, launching the new app or parachuting out of a perfectly good airplane at 15,000 feet.
Although all of those sound like fun to me and could be leaps, they don’t have to be yours. Sometimes, the leap we have to take seems inconsequential to others and yet leads to a bold moment of no return: reaching out to a recruiter with the hopes of transitioning out of our job, having the tough conversation with our partner, launching the side hustle or finally clicking record and spreading a message with the world.
What matters, then is not necessarily the magnitude of the leap. It’s simply that it matters to you, and includes the following:
You feel a pull. You can’t explain it, but you feel pulled toward your leap. Much like a magnetic charge, you can try to avoid it, but it comes back stronger than ever.
There’s a decision. Your leap involves a decision you’ve been putting off and will require you to make a bold choice.
The stakes are high. Your leap matters. There are real consequences to not making it. There are also endless possibilities by stepping into it.
There’s an element of risk. Your leap has a degree of risk, and for now you’ve chosen to play it “safe” at the expense of your own fulfillment.
Not doing it will hurt more than doing it. Lastly, even though you haven’t taken your leap yet, not doing so hurts more than any consequence or perceived failure of taking it.
So, again—what are you waiting for?
If you’re here, I already know you’re waiting for something. Every day you put it off, a part of you withers away, knowing your dreams are on hold as you attempt to live someone else’s life. (I use the word attempt deliberately, because no matter how hard we try, it’ll never quite pan out.)
Playing It Safe Means a Lifetime of Regret
As we begin this adventure, I want you to treat it as such. I’m going to take a wild guess you’ve read books with similar themes, but you haven’t read this one. Finishing this book will drive you toward a decision, which won’t be shared only between you and me.
There are a few reasons why you may be here right now, and I’m going to tell you why you should stick around:
First, you feel a calling for something bolder and bigger for your life, and you believe it may be possible, but you’re finding yourself stuck.
Second, you know if you continue on the same path you’re on today, you’re going to look back and feel the sinking feeling of regret.
Third, you’re tired of playing everyone else’s game. For too long, you’ve done what others told you to do and ignored a part of you that knew without question what was right.
Last, there’s a voice whispering to you during the silent pockets of life slowl
y begging you to put yourself on the line and do it now.
This voice comes to you when the intensity of life has slowed down. When it can no longer be drowned out in noise, bills, and an unrelenting breaking news cycle, it comes to you. Sometimes it whispers on those long car rides when you’re running on autopilot and have the ability to think, during those early mornings right before the chaos of the inbox hits. Or when you’re in those in-between moments on the airplane and the perspective of being at 37,000 feet invites some deeper questions.
As long as you fit one, two, or all of those descriptions—you’ve come to the right place.
By the end of our time together, one of two things will happen:
You’ll think everything I said sounded nice, but you won’t make the commitment I’m daring you to make—so this might as well be a video game. Except there’s no fantasy land, and I’m not nearly as entertaining.
Or, you’ll have the spark, the insight, the push required to create something so powerful that the current version of yourself can’t imagine it. You’ll be brought to your knees (except this time, in an is-this-really-happening way.)
You’ll finally take the Leap of Your Life and you’ll never be the same.
But I’ve Already Taken a Leap . . . Is This for Me?
You may be saying to yourself: but I’ve already taken the leap. You launched your business, you moved cross-country, you took the big chance. This can’t be for you, right?
Wrong. The fastest way to slide back to mediocrity is to believe life and business are about one leap. The truth is, life and business are a series of leaps and micro-leaps as you continue to expand on your journey. Most people assume if they already did a leap, they’ll be better prepared for the next one, right?