“Rainy…” He murmured her name, silently pleading with her to look at him.
She didn’t respond but just drew a ragged little breath that sounded as if she were near tears. Oh, God, he thought, not that. He was terrified at the idea that he might have caused her to cry.
“Honey, please … look at me.”
She bit her lower lip, then slowly turned her head until she faced him. Her eyes opened and he could see the glistening of tears there.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me …”
She astonished him then by giving him a wavery smile. “It’s okay,” she whispered. “It’s okay.”
He groaned, a sound more like a helpless laugh. “Nothing is okay now.” Groaning again, he rolled off her, landing on his back on the floor with a thud. Staring up at the ceiling that had become a no-man’s-land of strange events, he clasped his hands behind his head and drew calming breaths.
“I lied,” he said finally.
“About what?”
“What came over me. I know exactly what came over me.” It seemed like the time for bluntness. “I was out of my head with wanting you. My brain exited the room right about the time I felt you against me. I’m sorry. I usually have more control than that.”
She rolled onto her side and looked down at him. Her eyes were dry now, and he wondered what she was feeling. “You weren’t the only one who lost control,” she said gently.
That doesn’t make what I did any more excusable.” He gave her a rueful smile. “I don’t usually come on like gangbusters.”
A small smile curved her mouth. “I don’t usually give in quite so fast.”
Suddenly concerned that she not think he was misjudging her, he reached up and touched her cheek. “I know you don’t.”
“How could you know that?”
“Because I know you. At least a little. Well enough to know you don’t give yourself cheaply or easily.”
That eased a subtle tension in her face and told him he had managed to ease at least a part of her distress. Relief allowed him to relax.
“But I gotta say,” he admitted frankly, “not once in my entire life has a woman gone to my head as fast as you did.”
Another blush stained her cheeks, but she smiled.
“You don’t have to soothe my ego.”
“I’m not trying to. I’m trying to soothe my own. Losing control is not something I’m proud of, so naturally, it has to be your fault.”
“Oh.” A little laugh escaped her, and at last her smile reached her eyes. “I can live with that.”
“I figured you might be able to.” He gave her a grin. “You know, when I was sixteen and acted like an animal, I didn’t feel quite so embarrassed.”
“Ah, but when I was sixteen, I didn’t feel quite so flattered when a guy acted like an animal.”
A laugh exploded out of him, then faded away. He looked at her seriously. “I want you more than I’ve ever wanted a woman. But it’s not enough, is it?”
Looking almost sad, she shook her head.
“I didn’t think so.” He returned his attention to the ceiling. “You know, Joe’s handiwork is kind of interesting from this angle.”
She readily accepted the change of subject. “How so?”
“It makes me feel like I’m floating, to lie here and look at furniture. Try it.”
So she lay on her back on the couch and looked at the chair, table, and lamp on the ceiling. “You’re right,” she said after a moment. “It feels like I’m lying on the ceiling.”
“Neat, huh?”
Silence enveloped them for several minutes, and the last tension seeped out of the room.
“Rainy?”
“Hmm?”
“Do you feel Joe now?”
A few seconds passed before she answered. “Yes,” she said finally. “I do.”
“I thought so. Crazy as it makes me feel to admit it, sometimes I can feel him. And right now I get the feeling he’s pleased.”
“Yes, I think so.”
“Well, I guess I’d be pleased, too, if I were a ghost and I’d managed to put three pieces of furniture on the ceiling.”
“It is spectacular.”
He hesitated, afraid to ask, afraid of the answer. “But what does he want?”
Rainbow was silent for a couple of minutes that seemed endless. “There’s something he wants you to know,” she said finally, her voice sounding almost dreamy. “It’s important. But I’m sorry, Jake. I don’t know what it is.”
He sighed. “Well, I guess he’ll get around to letting me know when he’s ready.”
“I imagine so.”
They lay there for a long time, staring at the furniture, neither of them realizing what an amazing conversation they had just had.
“They’ve been up there too long,” Roxy said.
She, Dawn and Gene were sitting with Mary Todd, Ted Wannamaker, and Nellie Blair in the lobby at an octagonal table covered in green baize. Gene had suggested playing rummy, but no one else had seemed interested. Most of the others had drifted off to follow their own pursuits when they realized that nothing exciting was likely to happen for a while.
“Who?” Gene asked, knowing perfectly well to whom she referred. “The Dustbuster Brigade?”
“No, of course not,” Roxy said impatiently. “I’m talking about Rainy and Jake. They’ve been up in his apartment entirely too long.”
“It’s none of your business, Mother,” Dawn said.
“Of course it’s my business! She’s my daughter and she left me here while she went up to a man’s apartment. A man who, I might point out, is still a virtual stranger. For all any of us knows, he could be a serial killer. I hear they’re very charming.”
“Oh, Mother,” Dawn said in disgust, while Gene sent an amused look to Nellie, and Ted and Mary exchanged humorous glances.
Roxy straightened her purple turban, which was tilting precariously over one ear. “Well,” she said to Dawn, “how do you know he isn’t some unsavory character?”
“I’m sure he’s exactly what he says he is.”
“But how are you sure?”
Nellie spoke. “He’s exactly what he says he is, Roxy. I knew his uncle for years, and Jake has come to visit from time to time.”
“Mmph,” said Roxy, unwilling to be soothed. “I can’t believe she just walked off like that, after I interrupted my cruise to come to her aid!”
“Mother, you were looking for any conceivable excuse to get off that boat,” Dawn said drily. “Although telling the cruise company that your daughter had been in a terrible accident was going a little far, don’t you think?”
“Well, they wanted to know what kind of emergency it was. I could hardly say she was working on a haunting. They never would have understood that.”
“Probably not,” Gene agreed gravely.
“Oh, do be quiet, Gene! You’ve been impossible ever since you got out of diapers!”
Roxy looked toward the elevators again, drumming her extravagantly manicured nails on the table. “She’s going to get into trouble,” she said in a doomsday tone. “Even if he isn’t an ax murderer, nothing good can come of this.”
“He seems very nice,” Dawn said.
“He is,” Gene agreed.
Roxy clucked her tongue impatiently. “You hardly know him any better than I do. After Walter—”
“He’s not Walter,” Dawn said flatly. “And what’s more, Walter never looked at her the way Jake does, and Rainy never looked at Walter the way she looks at him.”
“That’s what worries me! I’m not blind. Walter was a mere thunderstorm in Rainy’s life. This young man could well turn out to be a force five hurricane.”
No one seemed to have any easy reply to that. Several minutes passed while Roxy tapped her toe impatiently and drummed her fingers. Finally she said, “I’m going up there.”
Mary spoke. “Don’t be ridiculous. The gal is thirty-something, which ent
itles her to make her own mistakes.”
“You don’t understand! You’re not a mother—”
Mary snorted. “It doesn’t take a mother to understand that you’re doing the gal absolutely no good if you feed her distrust of men!”
“Hear, hear,” said Gene, clapping his hands in approval. Nellie beamed at him.
“Traitor!” Roxy accused her brother. “Have you no heart? Don’t you care what happens to Rainbow?”
“Of course I care,” Gene replied. “I care every bit as much as you do.”
“You couldn’t possibly. You’re not her mother!”
Gene sighed. “You know, Roxy, I held that little girl when she was an infant. I babysat her for weeks at a time while you were off—what was it you called it? Oh, yes, doing your own thing. How many times did Dawn and Rainbow stay with me when I was able to take vacation? I’ll readily admit that I didn’t spend as much time with the girls as you did, but I also lay claim to some very parental feelings where they’re concerned. I was certainly the only father figure they ever had.”
Roxy sniffed. “Are you saying I was a bad mother?”
“Nothing of the sort! I am saying, however, that I’m the closest thing they ever had to a father, and that gives me some rights. Mary is quite right. Don’t feed her fear. If you do, you’ll only turn it into a prison.”
“It’s already a prison,” Dawn said. “She’s terrified of Jake. Terrified of even allowing him to be a friend.”
“That’s good,” said Roxy. “I don’t want her to be hurt.”
“None of us wants her to be hurt,” Gene said. “But sometimes that’s the price you pay if you don’t want to live in a cage.”
“It’s true,” Nellie said. “Years ago, when my husband had his first heart attack, I absolutely panicked about losing him. I was living in terror of something that hadn’t even happened yet. One afternoon, I was talking to my daughter, and said how awful it was to know I had nothing left to look forward to except losing him. And you know what she said to me? She said, ‘Mom, if we’re to be perfectly honest, that’s all any of us has to look forward to at any time in our lives.’ “
Gene reached out and took her hand, squeezing it gently. “Did it help?”
Nellie nodded. “It was a surprising help. Because she was right, of course. That’s all any of us has to look forward to, and if you let that cloud whatever days you have left, then you might as well give up right now. You have to risk the pain in order to find the joy. And as it happened, Mort and I had another twenty years together.”
“But this is different,” Roxy complained.
“No, it isn’t,” Mary said. “No pain, no gain.”
Gene chuckled and Mary winked at him.
But Roxy had apparently given up any thought of chasing her daughter down. Though she kept staring disapprovingly at the elevators, she made no move to get out of her chair.
“You don’t understand,” she said presently. “Rainbow hasn’t been the same since Walter walked out on her.”
“No, she hasn’t,” Gene agreed. “She’s become cautious.”
“She’s afraid,” Dawn said. “She hasn’t really let anyone get close to her since then.”
“So I’m worrying needlessly,” Roxy decided.
“Actually, you’re worrying about the wrong thing,” Gene argued. “You should be worrying that she won’t take risks anymore.”
Roxy frowned at him, but said nothing.
Just then Colonel Albemarle and his Dustbuster squad emerged from the elevators. The colonel marched over to them and touched his swagger stick to his pith helmet. “We’ve completed our sweep of the hallways and public areas,” he assured them. “If there was anything there, we’ve got it.”
Mary Todd arched an eyebrow at him. “And whatever are you going to do with whatever you’ve got, Colonel?”
He gave her a courteous nod. “Sergeant Fields will take the vacuums to an isolated area in Manatee County and dispose of the contents.”
“Mm. And how do you suppose the residents of Manatee County will feel about that?”
“As I said, Miss Todd, the contents will be disposed of in an isolated area.”
“One hopes.”
“I promise you, we are endeavoring to ensure that no one else will suffer from these rascals.”
“That’s good to know,” Mary said drily. “Well, don’t let us detain you.”
“My pleasure, ma’am. I just wanted to assure you that the public areas are now safe.”
Mary fluttered her eyelashes. “I do declare, I feel ever so much better!”
Beaming, the colonel and his squad departed.
“Mary,” Ted chided gently, “how could you tease him that way?”
“I did no such thing, Ted. All I was doing was playing along. What did you expect me to say? That he’s totally nuts and he and his Dustbusters need to be locked up?”
“You didn’t have to turn all southern belle on him.”
“I am a southern belle, Ted. Age hasn’t revoked my license to act like a ninny to inflate some poor male’s ego.”
Gene grinned at Ted. “You’d better look out.”
Ted shrugged. “I’m immune. She hasn’t treated me like a stupid male in years, anyway.”
Mary gave him an arch look. “Are you sure?”
He gave her a crooked smile. “You certainly haven’t tried to inflate my ego in at least fifty years.”
“Your ego has always been hardy enough. You don’t need anyone to inflate it.”
“I think I’m wounded.”
“Ha!” said Mary, unsympathetically.
Ted looked at Gene. “You see? But I suppose this is all a man can expect when he dangles after a woman for fifty years.”
“Fifty-four years,” Mary said.
“And I am letting you take me out to dinner tonight,” she reminded him.
“Yes, of course. How could I have forgotten? I am so honored.” But his eyes were twinkling as he looked fondly at Mary. “A southern belle must have her southern beau, after all.”
And surprising everyone, Mary actually blushed.
Rainbow found it surprisingly peaceful to lie on Jake’s couch, staring up at nothing in particular, letting the quiet wash over her, while he lay on the floor beside her. A sense of Joe’s presence was still there, but it was gentle and faint, troubling her not at all. To her psychic self, there was a sense of vaguely heard voices in the ether, but nothing that made any particular sense, something like the babbling of many voices in a faraway crowd.
She felt as if she could stay like this forever.
Jake stirred. “I guess we’d better go downstairs. The gossips in this building already have enough to talk about.”
“I guess so,” she agreed reluctantly.
She sat up and swung her legs to the floor. Jake was sitting cross-legged, looking at her with a smile.
“Reality intrudes,” he remarked.
“Always,” she agreed, with a touch of unusual bitterness.
His smile faded. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.”
With effort, she shrugged away the mood. “I’m fine. Just tired, I guess.” What she didn’t want to do was admit just how discontented she was feeling. It was hard now to remember that only a short while ago she had been perfectly content with her life as it was. Now all she seemed to be aware of was what it lacked.
And that was foolish. Happiness came from making others happy, not from seeking it for oneself. She knew that.
She found a smile somewhere and offered it to Jake. “Really,” she said again. “I’m fine.”
In one smooth movement, he rose to his feet and offered a hand to help her up. “Well, let’s go face all the knowing looks. Maybe we shook take separate elevators down.”
His wry suggestion drew a laugh from her. “My mother’s probably annoyed over the way I left her in the lobby.”
&nb
sp; He shrugged. “She’s grown up. She’ll get over it.”
“You don’t know my mother.”
He grinned. “Ah, but I know your Uncle Gene. He’ll calm her down.”
When they emerged in the lobby, they saw that almost everyone had disappeared, except for the group gathered at the octagonal card table. Six pairs of eyes fixed on them as soon as the elevator doors opened and there was no mistaking the curiosity in them.
“I suggest,” Jake said under his breath, “that we take the tack that you were seeking psychic impressions.”
“Easy enough to do.”
Fixing a smile on her face, hoping she didn’t blush, Rainbow walked forward, aware that Jake was right behind her. Somehow, knowing that made her feel able to face anything.
“Well?” said Roxy, looking suspiciously from her to Jake.
“I get a faint impression that Joe is hanging around Jake’s unit,” Rainbow answered easily, “but I can’t tell why.”
Roxy looked surprised, as if she wasn’t expecting to hear that at all. Good, thought Rainbow. There were some things she didn’t want to share with her mother.
But Roxy was never one to let a conversation get out of her control. “I still think we need to hold a seance.”
Rainbow hesitated. She was coming to that conclusion herself, but for some reason it made her unhappy.
“Mother,” said Dawn, “I told you, it has to be Rainbow’s decision. Besides, if your guides are being silent on this issue, a seance is hardly likely to do anything except give them an opportunity to play their games with us.”
“They play games?” Mary asked.
“Oh, yes,” said Roxy. “Sometimes they act like a bunch of mischievous children. Red Feather takes particular pride in being difficult.”
“He’s still trying to get even with white people,” Dawn explained. “He never misses an opportunity to remind us how we wronged the Indians.”
“Oh,” said Mary, at a loss for one of the few times in her outspoken life.
“And Mustafa just refuses to talk at all,” Dawn continued.
“I never realized that it could be so difficult,” Mary said.
“Oh, you just don’t know,” Roxy said, sensing a sympathetic audience. “Most people have absolutely no idea just how difficult it is to communicate with the spirit world!”