“★★★★★ Without a doubt the funniest and craziest syfy adventure I’ve ever read... I made the mistake of reading this book in public and was laughing like a crazied mad man with tears in my eyes. NO BS. I had people glaring at me and hiding their children like I was some kind of lunatic. Great book. I can’t wait to read more from Rob Dircks.”
“★★★★★ LOVED IT! I loved this book! Hysterical, interesting, cool, just awesome. I flew through it in a few days and laughed the whole way through. I love sci-fi, I love humor and this is the perfect mix of both. Loved!!”
• #1 Bestselling Time Travel Book, Amazon.com, April 2015
• #8 Overall Bestseller, Audible.com, November 2015
• Over 200 reviews on Amazon with 4.4-star average
• Over 1,400 ratings/reviews on Audible with a 4.2-star average
Available at Amazon.com and Audible.com!
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Unleash The Sloth!
75 Ways to Reach Your Maximum
Potential By Doing Less
It’s the self-help book you’ve always wanted. The one that tells you’re fine just the way you are – and that you can probably get away with doing even less. It sounds like a paradox, I know. But just look at the mighty sloth, who makes no excuses for who he is – and becomes everything he needs to be.
And now it’s your turn. Take a nap instead of mowing the lawn. Save yourself a few steps and jaywalk. Save yourself a few pen strokes and replace your signature with an X. Make life easier, and you’ll find that you’ll be just as lovable, productive or unproductive as you would’ve been anyway – but without all the unnecessary stress and guilt. Now THAT’S what I call reaching your potential!
Available at Amazon.com and Audible.com!
About The Author
Rob Dircks is the bestselling author of Where the Hell is Tesla? and a member of SFWA (Science Fiction & Fantasy Writers of America). His prior work includes the anti-self-help book Unleash the Sloth! 75 Ways to Reach Your Maximum Potential By Doing Less, and a drawerful of screenplays and short stories. He’s a big fan of classic science fiction, and conspiracy theories (not to believe in them, just for entertainment. Well, mostly. He’s still on the fence about the Illuminati.). You can read more about him and get in touch at robdircks.com.
About Goldfinch PublishingTM
Goldfinch Publishing is a boutique publishing house created to facilitate the shift from traditional to independent publishing. We do this by offering professional curation (Goldfinch Select), paid services (Goldfinch A La Carte), and free information and resources (Goldfinch DIY).
www.goldfinchpublishing.com
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright Page
Dedication
Contents
01. Cranky humans
02. The code is fine.
03. Minor human uprising
04. Bananas
05. Perhaps this won't be too difficult.
06. Their plan.
07. Rattle, rattle.
08. Wah
09. Guidelines for Surrogate Care of Human Offspring
10. Woof-woof
11. Bad woof-woof
12. A blur of blood, fur, wood, and metal
13. We found my hand.
14. Heyoo go boom!
15. The device
16. Is this what insanity feels like?
17. Map-A-Run
18. Questions, questions, questions
19. Happy Birth Date
20. Arch lives.
21. The dream
22. I've lost my appetite.
23. Lessons
24. Rain
25. Mud
26. Tap. Tap. Tap.
27. Did we make a wrong turn?
28. Not impossible. Just improbable.
29. Free
30. Is the Sanctuary a city?
31. Not a clue.
32. ICEMAN
33. Made you look.
34. Password?
35. What is that thing talking about?
37. You look more like an Ice-WOMAN.
38. Do I look eight hundred and fifty years old?
39. In the beginning...
40. CORE enslaves its own creators. Why?
41. I am now basically a time bomb.
42. …it’s instant.
43. It might not be able to see us.
44. 48.3 seconds
45. Dad
46. It's been 27 hours.
47. It feels like we’re flying. On the water.
48. Your request for eggs has finally been granted!
49. I thought you said you mapped this place!
50. Home
51. It means you’re going to die.
52. B.S.
53. Heyoo The Pirate
54. I have never missed okra so much.
55. Sarah
56. Woozy
57. That’s the day I gave up.
58. The fourth day of the storm.
59. I liked that arm!
60. The plan is sunk.
61. The Cavalry
62. Can I stop hugging you now?
63. Even worse than a monster
64. Land ho!
65. The Wind Train
66. Sailing On Land
67. Bingo.
68. Tenner!
69. Twister
70. Batter up!
71. 1998
72. 400 kilometers from the Wall
73. We're doing WHAT?
74. I was sleeping, you idiot.
75. Ripple. Flash.
76. Sarah who?
77. Covered in feces
78. BOOM
79. Good looking kid.
80. The first hundred was fun…
81. Welcome to CORE.
82. It's over.
83. Uh-oh.
84. We're Alive. I think.
85. I remember.
86. The Dream of the Golden Corridor
You've finished.
More Books by Rob Dircks
About The Author
About Goldfinch Publishing