tell him mine really was bigger than his. I knew he wasn’t doing it
on purpose, but sometimes I hated how much girls flocked to him.
Couldn’t he just be normal for one day, so the girl would follow me
instead of him? Did I need to take off my shirt? Belt out a song? Get
down on one knee? Oh shit, I just said knee, which meant proposal,
which meant marriage. Why were my hands sweating? I glanced at
Alyssa. Okay, it was more of a stare, a stalker stare that had me
watching every breath that escaped her perfectly bow-shaped lips.
God, I wanted to taste her again. Would I ever get enough? I
adjusted in my seat and cursed the fact that I was a guy.
Mrs. Miller came with our drinks. Alyssa closed her eyes
and took a sip. Damn, what I wouldn’t do to be hot chocolate right
now. Chocolate ran down the side of the white cup. Her pink
tongue darted out and licked the liquid as she moaned to herself. I
take everything back. I just want to be a cheap ass cup. That’s what
I want to be.
“I can tell taffy flavors by smelling the wrappers,” Alyssa
said, interrupting my ceramic daydream.
“No way!” Nat slapped her own leg. “I bet that comes in
handy.”
Alyssa rolled her eyes and took another sip of her hot
chocolate. She needed to be done with that drink before I threw
caution to the wind and mauled her. “Not really. I mean, I was able
to guess what type of taffy Demetri was eating, but that’s it.”
“Let me guess.” Alec leaned forward. “He makes you sniff
all the wrappers after he eats them to see if you’re right?”
“Every time.” Alyssa winked in my direction. My arousal
just jumped into overdrive. Watching her joke with Nat and Alec,
the two most important people in my life and then be so easy-going
while doing it. I wanted her so bad. I wanted to throw the hot
chocolate to the ground, jump onto her lap, and have my way with
her.
She sighed and tucked a piece of fallen hair behind her ear,
giving me full view of her lips and a tiny drop of hot chocolate that
was at the corner of her mouth.
I needed a cold shower stat. Desperate, I looked around for
something to distract me. Anything really. My eyes fell on Mrs.
Miller kissing her husband. He swatted her ass. She wiggled in his
arms and then did a dance I can only describe as something that
should be outlawed in every state. And arousal gone. Good. That
was easy. I cleared my throat and tried to relax. This was supposed
to be fun. I was supposed to be bonding; instead I was resorting to
staring at old people in order to keep my pants on. Hi, my name’s
Mighty, and yes. Yes, I have so incredibly fallen.
“So what else is going on? My mom says you’re leading
group therapy?” Nat asked, sufficiently changing the subject,
which I was thankful for, considering I had just thought of at least
seven different ways I could kiss Alyssa’s neck. Apparently
watching old people wasn’t as good of a distraction as I thought.
“Yup.” I leaned back in the chair. The smell of steak filled
the salty air. “I’ve only led group once. Actually our next meeting is
in a few days I don’t know. I mean, at first I kept saying no. I hate
to admit, I finally said yes, because I wanted to see Alyssa again,
but then… I don’t know. I feel like a chick saying this, but I liked it.
I mean, I liked feeling like I was helping people.”
Nat shrugged. “Demetri, you’ve always been that way, you
just never saw that about yourself.”
“Probably because you were high most the time,” Alec
interjected.
“Thanks, man.” Always good to know I had his support. He
smirked in my direction while I gave him the finger. I glanced back
at Nat and took another sip of coffee. “Anyway, it’s been really
good.”
Alyssa was silent next to me. Crap, I had totally outed her in
front of Nat and Alec. I reached for her hand. She squeezed it and
then winked at me. I didn’t realize I’d been holding my breath until
she did that. Relaxing, I leaned back again and listened to the
waves.
“I like it here.” Alyssa sighed. “It’s peaceful.”
“No autographs,” Alec said.
Nat laughed. “Or panty throwing.”
“Or taffy jingles.” I lifted my cup into the air. “Cheers,
everyone.”
silence, where I’m happy to announce Justin Bieber and One
Direction did not make a musical appearance, Mr. Miller came out
with a huge platter of food.
My stomach growled on cue.
“Okay, boys, got some steak here for you. Rare, just how you
like it. The missus cooked up some potatoes, carrots, and of course,
chicken, just in case the girls don’t want red meat.” He set the
platter down while Mrs. Miller came around and put the plates on
the tables sitting next to each of our chairs.
“Oh.” Mr. Miller held up his finger. “I almost forgot the
applesauce, I’ll be right back.”
“Applesauce?” Alyssa asked.
“Yeah, for the steak and potatoes.” Duh, it was a staple! Like
ketchup or mustard.
“Not following.” Alyssa laughed and looked at Nat. “Is he
being serious?”
Nat shook her head. “Don’t knock it till you try it. I
remember the first time Alec introduced me to applesauce at
dinner. I thought he was crazy, but it’s pretty good.”
Mr. Miller returned with a huge bowl of applesauce. I threw
it onto my plate and gave Alyssa a wink.
She scrunched her nose. “Are you really going to eat that
with your meat and potatoes?”
“It’s tradition.” I acted offended, but really I knew it wasn’t
that normal for people to put applesauce with dinner. “Actually, I
blame our Dutch friends from Canada. They used to always eat like
that when we were kids, and it just kinda stuck.”
“Hmm.” Alyssa took a spoonful of applesauce and tossed it
onto her plate. “If I hate it, I’m blaming you guys.”
“Fine.” I chuckled and cut up my meat.
“No way!” Alyssa yelled. I dropped my fork.
“What? What’s wrong?”
Her eyes lit up with astonishment. “That’s amazing!”
I took a large bite and shrugged. “So from here on out you
should just take my word for it. Demetri is always right.”
“And Demetri shouldn’t refer to himself in the third person.
It’s weird,” Alec interjected.
“Also true.” I thrust my fork into the air. “So what movie are
we seeing?”
“Romance,” Nat answered. “And before either one of you
argue with me, just know that I had to go to not one, not two, but
three movie premiers when I was with Alec, and they were all gory
action movies that made me want to bang my head against my own
hand.”
“They were pretty rough,” Alec agreed. “But he’s a cool
dude, so I wanted to support him.”
“He?” Alyssa asked tentatively.
; Alec grinned. “Jamie Jaymeson. He’s from England. Girls
love him, but he sports an American accent in all his action movies.
Anyways He’s good people.”
Alyssa nodded. This was the part that made me nervous.
Everyone knew who Jaymeson was. I mean, next to Robert Pattison
he was the biggest thing to cross the Atlantic since Twilight. Did it
freak her out to know we were all friends? That it was part of our
world and would soon be part of hers too? It scared the hell out of
me when I thought of merging my life with the one in Seaside. It
didn’t fit. I wanted it to, but it was like two puzzle pieces that
weren’t cut to go together, and I didn’t know how to fix it. I looked
down at my food and sighed.
We ate the rest of our food in silence. I was too hungry to
talk, and then when I was finished I couldn’t help but stare at
Alyssa. Everything about her was sensual. The way she ate bread
was freaking sensual. I really needed to get a hold of myself if I was
going to be in the same room with her without dying.
Pretty sure I read somewhere that it could happen to a guy.
It seriously felt like it now. I cleared my throat and looked away,
even though all I wanted to do was be the creepy dude that
watched her cut her meat.
Yes. I wanted to watch her cut her meat. That was how hard
I had fallen. I dug out a piece of taffy from my pocket and popped
it into my mouth.
wouldn’t do for a joint.
“Movie?” Alyssa asked once the plates were cleared.
“Let’s do it,” I said, this time watching her as she stood and
stretched her little arms above her head, giving me an amazing
view of a tight little stomach. God, I was going to die this way.
Chapter Seventeen
Alyssa
The drive to the small movie theatre wasn’t too bad. The
closer we got to the narrow roads of Seaside, the easier it was for
me to remain calm about the fact that for the first time in years I
had traveled outside my tiny little hole of a town.
My chest still hurt, but I swear it was like Demetri could tell
when I would start to panic. He’d squeeze my hand, and then it
was like by squeezing my hand, he somehow pushed the fear
away.
I sighed in relief the minute we rolled back into familiar
territory.
The movie theatre wasn’t crowded, which was a double
bonus. I didn’t do crowds, and I knew Demetri and Alec would be
irritated if there were lots of teen girls running around screaming
their names and sobbing their eyes out.
They were normal guys, right? I mean, it wasn’t as if
anything about them was any different from any other guy in this
world.
I stole a glance at Demetri as he got out of the car and
stretched his arms out in front of him. Seriously, how did that
sweatshirt even fit him? It hugged every muscle in his arms. I had
no idea guys even had that many muscles in their arms, and I used
to hang out with football players all the time.
He looked my way. I felt myself blush. Caught. Crap I was
totally caught ogling the hottest guy I’ve ever seen. My mouth was
even open. Perfect. He sauntered, yes, sauntered, as in slowly
walked toward me with his hips swaying slightly back and forth. I
looked down at the ground. My eyes were screaming at me to look
at him, but I swear, in that moment I felt like if I did I would melt
into a puddle, efficiently ruining one of the best days I’ve ever had.
“Lyss? You okay?” He chuckled, tilting my chin toward him.
His smile was my addiction; it was too bright, too beautiful not to
respond to. His deep set dimples made his face light up into what I
think every woman in my position would refer to as perfection.
“Yup,” I croaked. “Just awesome.” I felt my eyebrows lift as
if to prove how totally fine I was, when really on the inside my
heart was racing like crazy.
“Mmm…” His mouth descended.
Forget what I said earlier about him being like any other
guy.
Other guys don’t kiss like that.
What do they do in Hollywood? Give kissing lessons? Teach
the art of seduction?
His tongue tasted like the Jack Daniels taffy I had given him,
sweet with a bit of salt. I opened my mouth to him as his warm
hands braced my lower back, reaching lower than what was
probably appropriate in public. He pushed me against the car and
moaned into my mouth. I wrapped my arms around his neck and
tried to press harder against him. It was as if I couldn’t get enough
of him.
“Dude,” Alec ground out. “We’re going to miss the movie.
You can make out later. You’re going to kill her if you keep
sweeping in like that with no warning whatsoever. She can barely
stand straight!”
Demetri pulled back chuckling. I was that girl. The girl that I
swore I’d never be. The one that would literally stalk the object of
her affection and never look back. His kiss did so many things to
me. Things that, the minute Brady died, I thought too painful to
experience again. I waited for the all too familiar stab in my chest.
But it didn’t happen. Demetri held out his hand and smiled at me.
Being with Demetri wasn’t the absence of pain. It was the
added presence of peace, making it easier and easier for that little
part of my heart to heal again.
“Your call.” Demetri smirked, kissing me softly across the
neck. “Movie or make out?”
“No. No skipping out.” Alec approached us. “Don’t listen to
him, Alyssa. He’s using his Jedi mind tricks on you. Look away!
Look away!”
I bit my lip and closed my eyes.
“Or that,” Alec said.
“Movie,” I squeaked. I hadn’t been to see in one in over a
year. I just rented everything and sat alone at my house.
No wonder I’d lost all my friends.
Demetri grabbed my hand and led me into the theatre.
It suddenly dawned on me how disappointed Brady would
be in my behavior. He’d always said I would change the world one
day with my constant cheerfulness and positive attitude.
How did I go from that person — a person I don’t even
remember being — to someone my parents put on suicide watch?
The smell of buttered popcorn bombarded my senses as we
made our way past the ticket counter. The boys wouldn’t let Nat or
me pay. Which was weird for me. The only person I’d ever dated
before was Brady. We were such good friends that I never wanted
to take advantage of him. We always went Dutch. Until now, I’d
never understood how good it felt to have someone treat me.
My smile was huge. I couldn’t help it. Demetri walked up to
the candy counter and scanned the glass. “One box of Swedish
Fish, a bag of Gummi Worms, two bags of plain M&M’s and three
sodas.”
“Are we feeding an army?” I nudged him as he paid for the
candy and pop.
He grinned and nudged me ba
ck. “Nope, just a recovering
drug addict with a very serious candy addiction.”
“Thanks, bro.” Alec swiped the Swedish Fish away from
Demetri and opened the bag, dangling a fish in front of Nat. She
blushed and kissed him before tossing it into her mouth.
“Never mind them. Swedish Fish are kinda their thing.”
Demetri smirked and wrapped his arm around me.
“And worms are yours?” I asked.
“Worms, taffy, soda, Alyssa…” His voice trailed off.
“Too bad I don’t fit in your pocket and give you a cavity.” I
sighed.
“You’re short enough to, let’s be honest. And while you
couldn’t give me a cavity, you make me want to taste you every
second I’m with you.” He licked his lips and grinned.
“Oh.” I felt my cheeks heat as I looked away. Thankfully the
movie theatre was somewhat dim, thanks to the crappy lights they
used. Otherwise, I would have been embarrassed over the fact that
I was blushing like a fool.
We found the right theatre and went to the back. The
previews started just as we sat down.
I should have known my perfect day would end horribly.
The screen went green, and then the first preview started.
My chest tightened as I watched the preview unfold. The
story so similar to my own. Girl and boy fall in love. Boy dies, but
not before getting girl pregnant, and then she’s shunned by her
friends until the new boy in school takes her under his wing.
The new boy is a football player.
I smiled at the relationship between the two.
And then that guy gets in a horrible accident, leaving her
wondering if she would be left alone again without her love. My
breathing was erratic, that much I knew. I tried to close my eyes,
but the screeching of metal hitting metal was suddenly too much
for me.
I ran out of the theatre, tears streaming down my face. Crap.
Why did I have to cry now, when everything finally felt normal? As
if it was going to be fine.
I ran right into Sam, who was standing with Aaron. “Hey,
you okay, Alyssa?”
“Fine,” I mumbled then pushed past them. My vision
blurred as I tried to get to the women’s restroom in time. I felt like I
was going to pass out. The sound of the crash played over and over
again in my head.
The way I held his broken body, the way my hands looked
so tiny trying to do compressions against his chest.