PING:This is a man breathing with another man.
SHI-ZHENG (In Chinese):This is a man breathing with another man.
PING:This is a man
being a brother to another man
breathing with another man
sitting with this other man
eating with this other man
being with this other man
one with this other man.
(The montaged photograph is now clearly shown. It is:)
PROJECTION: Walter Scott and Wong Kee eating together
PING: 1908. Walter Scott and Wong Kee tried to have lunch together.
No one would serve Wong Kee. Walter Scott and Wong Kee sat in the sun instead and ate together.
PROJECTION: 21
ALL: 21.
(Ric and Shi-Zheng begin an abstract movement sequence. Each italicized phrase cues a movement reminiscent of its meaning.)
PROJECTION: From a Chinese-English Phrasebook of 1875
PING:He took it from me by violence. (Claws)
He claimed my gold mine. (Soup)
He cheated me out of my wages. (Kick step)
ALETA: Was Coolie High a film about inner-city Chinese youth?
PING: Can I sleep here tonight? (Peekaboo)
ALETA: “Take me out to the ball game . . .”
PING: An unmarried man is called a bachelor. (Woman thinking)
ALETA: Nigger, kike, chink, wop, gook, spic!
PING: The United States has many immigrants. (Steps)
ALETA: And they’re all so happy.
PING: More Tea? (Teapot)
ALETA: They are all so pleased. (Please)
PING: She is a good-for-nothing hussy. (I like him)
ALETA: I like your shoes. Ferragamo?
PING: The passage money is fifty dollars from Hong Kong to California. (Alligators)
ALETA: “On a clear day you can see forever.”
PING: No one can go to heaven without being a Christian. (Slaps)
ALETA: Some people say no when they mean yes.
PING: The Chinese immigration will soon be stopped. (Cloudhands)
(Michael joins the movement sequence.)
ALETA: Nancy Kwon, Anna Mae Wong, Joan Chen.
PING: Can I have some food? (Zombie)
ALETA: History will be written by the victors.
PING: He assaulted me without provocation. (Windmill)
ALETA: “Everybody was kung-fu fighting—huh!”
PING: More tea, please. (Elbow panhandle)
ALETA: “Those cats were fast as lightning—huh!”
PING: He tries to extort money from me. (Crane)
ALETA: Lung, the dragon smiles its wayward smile.
PING: The men are striking for wages. (Minister)
(Ric leaves the movement sequence. Michael and Shi-Zheng continue to move.)
ALETA: The Vincent Chin murder case united the Chinese community in ways never seen before.
PING: He was choked to death with a lasso by a robber. (Birds in hand)
ALETA: Is there any gunpowder tea left?
PING: I said, is there any gunpowder tea left?
(Sound of multiple cannonball explosions.)
PROJECTION: 22
PING: 22.
PROJECTION: Mrs. Chin
ALETA:My husband serves in the American army
we were happy to come to America
my father say America hard
my husband say America good
and I think so, too.
And lots of Chinese
lots of Chinese
my husband say all American good
he get job in a factory
we go to baseball game
very American
but they kick and curse at us.
I ask my husband
why they do this?
Why they do this?
(Sound of baseball being hit. A crowd roars.)
RIC: I tell you folks, the Detroit Tigers are on a roll! Last night they pulverized the New York Yankees in a 12 to 0 victory. Johnson bashed out two homeruns that probably ended up somewhere in China!!! And you know what they say—if you dig a hole deep enough, you come out on the other side in China!!!
CAST: Chow chow chow . . .
PROJECTION: Photo of Ping’s fifth grade class
(During Ping’s speech, the projection closes in on an Italian girl, the only one among the many Asian faces.)
PING: New York City. 1957.
I am in the fifth grade at P.S. 23 at the corner of Mulberry and Bayard Streets on the border of Chinatown and Little Italy. One day our teacher introduces a new student to our class. All twenty-three Chinese faces look up with jaws dropped to see a Sicilian country girl, her head dripping with sausage curls, dressed in an old-fashioned cotton print dress with white lace frills. Her name is Philomena—she is a vision from another planet. She can’t speak a word of English. We torment her for the rest of the year.
ALETA: Whose history is this anyway?
PROJECTION: 23
PROJECTION: Accessories for Smoking Opium
ALL: 23.
(Music for the “Opium” song starts.)
SHI-ZHENG AND MICHAELRIC AND ALETA
(Singing): (Translating):
Yen Tsiang Pipe or gong
Ow The bowl
Yen Hock Dripping needle
Yen Hop The box
Yen Dong The lamp
Kiao Tsien Scissors for cutting
Sui Dow Sponge for cleaning
Dao The knife
Yen Tar Har The table
Yen Shee Hop Box for ashes
Yen Shee The ashes
Gee Yen The residue
Yen Shee Gon The scraper
Yee You
Shee And
Kwoi. Me.
RIC (Mimes smoking an opium pipe):A friend took me there.
Sixty Annamite boys lay smoking
on two tiers of planks
rows of lamps
one boy was gripped in the heat of a convulsive nightmare.
The smokers were as inert as vegetables
You know . . . isn’t it kinda funny . . . you know . . .
it’s the only vegetable substance
that, you know . . . produces a vegetable-like state in the
user, you know . . .
A person under the influence
does not talk . . . does not sing . . . does not laugh . . .
does not quarrel . . .
and is not prone to . . . what do they call it?
. . . um . . . maudlin fellowship, you know . . .
There is no sexual arousal.
None, whatsoever.
It is a passive experience.
You feel no need to create masterpieces . . . you become
one...
The bliss of misery.
Communication is useless . . . you know . . .
It’d be like saying to paper Shakespeare soils
or quenching the tears of silence broken by Bach.
. . . something like that . . .
I was able to cure myself in 1929. A necessary hell
Je suis Jean Cocteau . . .
(Sound of multiple cannonball explosions.)
PROJECTION: 24
PING: 24.
West meets West.
Macartney briefs his staff.
Scene 8.
MICHAEL: Lord George Macartney.
ALETA: Ambassador Extraordinaire to the Celestial Empire of China . . .
RIC: Former Governor General of British West Indies,
SHI-ZHENG: former Governor General of all India,
MICHAEL: Knight of . . .
ALETA: Etcetera,
SHI-ZHENG: etcetera,
PING: etcetera . . .
RIC: My lords—just a couple of reminders here okay . . . Our objectives on this urgent mission are as follows—
MICHAEL: Open new ports for British trade in China.
ALETA: Obtain the cession of a pi
ece of territory
RIC: or an island,
MICHAEL: as close as possible to the area of tea and silk production,
ALETA: where British merchants can reside year-round,
SHI-ZHENG: make lots and lots of money
RIC: and in which British jurisdiction is exercised.
PING: That means: if you crack open a Chinaman’s head, don’t worry about it.
MICHAEL: Create new markets in China.
ALETA: Establish a permanent embassy in Beijing.
RIC: And last but not least establish an intelligence mission . . .
MICHAEL: However, do not excite any suspicion—
SHI-ZHENG: And don’t forget . . .
RIC: spying is good and misinformation even better.
MICHAEL: History is written by the victors, you know . . .
CAST: Boom boom boom . . .
PING: 25.
East meets West.
Liang meets Macartney.
Scene 9.
MICHAEL: The emperor, the one and only son of heaven,
ALETA: father of his country,
SHI-ZHENG: His Most Highness,
RIC: the pivot of heaven earth and
CAST: humanity,
RIC: etcetera,
ALETA: etcetera,
PING: etcetera . . .
MICHAEL: hereby decrees that the Chinese delegation,
ALETA: the children and servants of the one and only son of heaven,
SHI-ZHENG: father of his
CAST: country—
RIC: etcetera,
MICHAEL: etcetera,
PING: etcetera . . .
MICHAEL: will lead your envoy and adjuncts to the foot of the throne on His Majesty’s eighty-third birthday. The procession will follow . . . as follows . . .
PROJECTION: Will Macartney do the nine kowtows?
PROJECTION: The Emperor has arrived but is waiting in the wings.
(During the following Ric, Shi-Zheng and Aleta perform a very stylized, deep, formal kowtow.)
You will wait for a sign . . . a sign from the emperor to present the gifts and tributes sent by King George III of England. You will then perform nine kowtows—that’s nine as in nuove, as in the whole nine yards, as in nine guys on a team. When these gestures of reverence have been noted and accepted, you will move slightly . . . an itty-bitty tiny bit forward and perform one more kowtow before returning quietly . . . as in “you coulda heard a pin drop,” as in “quiet as a mouse” to your assigned places. Smoking or chewing gum or fat is prohibited during the proceedings of protocol. His Most Highness, the one and only Son of Heaven, father of his country,
PING: etcetera,
MICHAEL: etcetera,
PING: etcetera . . .
MICHAEL: does not like the chewing of gum. In fact, chewing of any kind . . . any kind is forbidden.
PROJECTION: 26
PING: 26.
East meets East.
Palace gossip.
Scene 10.
RIC: Well, the British, they don’t kowtow, lowtow or bowwow for nobody.
ALETA: That entourage is hardheaded and snotty . . . Ya know what they did? Tell’em . . .
RIC: Ya know what they did? Listen to this . . .
ALETA: Well, when the viceroy said that they must . . .
RIC: Ya hear her—must—bowwow to the emperor
ALETA: they went wild!
RIC: Oh yeah! Smoke started fuming out their heads like clouds of...
ALETA: beaucoup opium or like . . . aaah . . .
RIC: . . . a North Korean nuclear plant . . .
RIC AND ALETA: They went ape-shit chow mein!
RIC: Well, Lordy Macartney
ALETA: Lordy Macartney . . .
RIC AND ALETA: . . . and his merry men
RIC: went back to the little chalet the viceroy put them up in.
ALETA: You mean that piece of swamp with a couple of decaying pavilions and some tents?
RIC: First-class swamp, girlfriend!
ALETA: Excuse me . . .
RIC: Well, his oh so Lordy Lordy . . . came up with an alternate plan.
ALETA: Business is business.
RIC: Love, brotherhood and human rights get swept right under the carpet,
RIC AND ALETA: once money rears its pretty little head!
RIC: Forget human rights!
ALETA: I already said that . . .
RIC: Take no prisoners!
ALETA: Uhuhmm . . .
RIC: Money uber alles!
ALETA: Right.
RIC: So.
ALETA: So . . . tell them the plan.
RIC: I tell them the plan?
ALETA: You tell them the plan. (To audience) He’ll tell you the plan.
RIC: So the plan the British came up with was—now get this—so the plan the British came up with was—now get this—to hang a picture . . .
ALETA: to hang a picture
RIC: of King George III
ALETA: of King George III
RIC: behind the emperor
ALETA: behind the emperor
RIC: so that they would be bowing to their king
ALETA: so that they would be bowing to their king
RIC: and only look like they were kowtowing to his
ALETA: toasty-mosty—
RIC: the emperor,
ALETA: etcetera, etcetera, etcetera . . .
GUY (One of the musicians): Who?
RIC: Hello!!! The emperor!
GUY: Aaaaah.
RIC: It all smacks of S&M, doesn’t it?
GUY: Yeah, “sadness & madness.”
ALETA: Stick to the music, Guy . . .
RIC: That’s nothing. Just wait until the Americans get into the picture.
ALETA: Have you seen that soap series, The Chinese Must Go?
RIC: The one set out west?
ALETA: Prospectors,
RIC: gold miners . . .
ALETA: opium freaks—
RIC: Wait a minute . . . Am I supposed to sing something now? Guy, am I supposed to sing something now?
GUY: Yep . . .
PROJECTION: 27
ALL: 27.
(The following is sung to the tune of “Chopsticks.”)
MICHAEL: Give me a roast duck
MICHAEL: or maybe fresh carp
RIC: snap snapper
MICHAEL AND RIC: boiled down in a ginger sauce.
MICHAEL: Give me some string beans
RIC: some snowpeas with rice
MICHAEL AND RIC:I’m gonna cook up a storm
for my man tonight.
He likee chicken and the fish
but he don’t do pork
no he won’t do pork.
He likee string beans
snow peas and rice
but oh no, no pork
he says:
“Tastes like tree!”
GUY: Like what?
RIC: Like tree . . .
GUY: Like tree?
MICHAEL: Like tree.
GUY: Like tree, like tree, like tree!
CAST (Singing):Give me some margarine
scones and some tea
maybe some fish and chips
deep fried in lots of lard
give me a meat pie
a peach pie
a pudding
gonna cook up a storm
for my man tonight!
He loves that British
haute cuisine
so he’ll eat this up
yes, he’ll eat this up.
He likes that bland
and soggy food
and he’ll eat it up
’cause it tastes like . . .
Can’t eat the food they serve
don’t get the customs they have
or the language they speak
so aggressively
won’t give in, can’t give in
shan’t give in, won’t give in
can’t give in
shan�
�t give in
no olay!!
They are the proudest
stubbornest bunch
and I will not budge
no I will not budge.
They are the high
and mightiest bunch
and I will not budge
’cause I am a Brit-Chinese.
GUY: A what?
ALETA AND RIC: A Brit
SHI-ZHENG AND MICHAEL: Chinese
CAST: Olay!
(Sound of a train going by.)
PING:Silent swans.
Spreading their wings, flapping their wings . . .
Whose history is this anyway?
History is the story of men and women, not birds.
Yes, please, more tea.
Yes, please, more tea . . .
PROJECTION: 28
ALL: 28.
PROJECTION: Mrs. Chin
ALETA:Vincent grew up good.
He have many friends.
White, black, Chinese.
He get job
he buy car
he gonna marry
and take care of me after my man die.
A good Chinese boy.
A good American boy.
He came home from work and said
that he’s going out with friends. I say:
“Vincent, why you do this?
You marry tomorrow.”
He say: