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    It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Zombies

    Page 3
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      Sung to the tune of “Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer”

      He ate Dasher, then Dancer,

      Then Prancer and Vixen.

      He downed Comet and Cupid

      And Donner and Blitzen.

      Yes, he ate them all, the most

      Famous undead reindeer of all:

      Rudolph, the Zombie reindeer,

      Caught the virus through his nose.

      And if you ever saw him,

      You would even say he’s gross.

      All of the other reindeer

      Tried real hard to get away.

      But they didn’t count on Rudolph

      Eating them anyway.

      Then one foggy Christmas Eve,

      Santa came to say:

      “Rudolph, with your Zombie blight,

      Who’s gonna pull my sleigh tonight?”

      Rudolph instead just ate him,

      Munching Santa’s brain with glee,

      Rudolph, the Zombie reindeer,

      You changed Christmas history!

      ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS TO BE A ZOMBIE

      Sung to the tune of “All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth”

      Every body pauses and stares at me,

      I’m a pile of rotting flesh as you can see.

      It looks like a virus caused this catastrophe!

      But my one wish on Christmas Eve is to be a Zombie!

      All I’ll eat for Christmas

      Is your frontal lobe,

      Your frontal lobe,

      With my two front teeth!

      Gee, if I could only

      Eat your frontal lobe,

      Then more Zombies would spread around the globe.

      It seems so long since I’ve been undead;

      Sister Susie’s a rotting hag!

      Gosh oh gee, how happy I’d be,

      If only there were more brains to be had!

      All I want for Christmas

      Is to be a Zombie,

      To be a Zombie,

      To be a Zombie.

      Gee, if I could only

      Be a Christmas Zombie,

      Then I could eat you

      On Christmas Day!

      ZOMBIE CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

      Sung to the tune of “Santa Claus Is Coming to Town”

      You better watch out,

      You better not cry,

      Better not shout,

      Or he’ll know where you hide—

      Zombie Claus is coming to town!

      He’s eating a wrist

      And chewing it twice;

      A little fresh brain with pepper is nice.

      Zombie Claus is coming to town!

      He eats you when you’re sleeping;

      He bites when you’re awake.

      He chews if you’ve been bad or good,

      So just hide for goodness’ sake!

      O, you better watch out,

      You better not cry,

      Better not shout,

      Or he’ll know where you hide.

      Zombie Claus is coming to town!

      Zombie Claus is coming to town!

      About the Author and the Illustrator

      MICHAEL P. SPRADLIN is the author of several children’s picture books, the novels and manga volumes in the Spy Goddess series, and the Youngest Templar novels. He lives in Michigan with his family.

      JEFF WEIGEL is an author, illustrator, and graphic designer who lives in Belleville, Illinois. He has been a frequent contributor to Image Comics’ Big Bang anthology, and is the author and illustrator of the children’s picture books Atomic Ace (He’s Just My Dad), Atomic Ace and the Robot Rampage, and the forthcoming graphic novel Thunder from the Sea.

      Visit www.AuthorTracker.com for exclusive information on your favorite HarperCollins author.

      ALSO BY MICHAEL P. SPRADLIN

      SPY GODDESS NOVELS

      Live and Let Shop

      To Hawaii, with Love

      SPY GODDESS MANGA

      The Chase for the Chalice

      The Quest for the Lance

      THE YOUNGEST TEMPLAR NOVELS

      Keeper of the Grail

      Trail of Fate

      PICTURE BOOKS

      The Legend of Blue Jacket

      Texas Rangers: Legendary Lawmen

      Daniel Boone’s Great Escape

      Credits

      Cover design by Milan Bozic

      Illustrations by Jeff Weigel

      Copyright

      IT’S BEGINNING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE ZOMBIES! Copyright © 2009 by Michael P. Spradlin. Illustrations copyright © 2009 by Jeff Weigel. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

      Adobe Digital Edition September 2009 ISBN 978-0-06-198602-4

      10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

      About the Publisher

      Australia

      HarperCollins Publishers (Australia) Pty. Ltd.

      25 Ryde Road (PO Box 321)

      Pymble, NSW 2073, Australia

      http://www.harpercollinsebooks.com.au

      Canada

      HarperCollins Publishers Ltd.

      55 Avenue Road, Suite 2900

      Toronto, ON, M5R, 3L2, Canada

      http://www.harpercollinsebooks.ca

      New Zealand

      HarperCollinsPublishers (New Zealand) Limited

      P.O. Box 1

      Auckland, New Zealand

      http://www.harpercollins.co.nz

      United Kingdom

      HarperCollins Publishers Ltd.

      77-85 Fulham Palace Road

      London, W6 8JB, UK

      http://www.harpercollinsebooks.co.uk

      United States

      HarperCollins Publishers Inc.

      10 East 53rd Street

      New York, NY 10022

      http://www.harpercollinsebooks.com

      Table of Contents

      Cover

      Title Page

      Dedication

      Contents

      Introduction, by Christopher Moore

      Author’s Note: I’ll Be Undead this Christmas

      I Saw Mommy Chewing Santa Claus

      Zombies on the Housetop

      We Three Spleens

      The Zombie Christmas Song

      Undead Christmas

      It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Zombies

      Nothing Like Brains for the Holidays

      Zombie Wonderland

      Good King Wenceslas Tastes Great

      Have Yourself a Medulla Oblongata

      Here Comes Zombie Claus

      Snacking Around the Christmas Tree

      Slay Ride

      A Jolly Zombie Christmas

      Deck the Halls with Parts of Wally

      Zombie, the Snowman

      Eat a Toe

      Here We Come A-Garroting

      I’m Dreaming of an Undead Christmas

      Zombie Yells

      Let’s Feast on Merry Gentlemen

      Silver Brains

      I’ll Be Undead for Christmas

      Grandma Got Turned into a Zombie

      It’s the Most Wonderful Time to Feel Fear

      We Wish You an Undead Christmas

      Smash Their Heads with a Rock

      Rudolph, the Zombie Reindeer

      All I Want for Christmas Is to Be a Zombie

      Zombie Claus Is Coming to Town

      About the Author and the Illustrator

      Other Books by Michael P. Spradlin

      Credits

      Copyright

      About the Publisher

     


     

     



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