"Then what are you saying?"
"That Luke Skywalker could have a hundred children by now. A
thousand."
"That's crazy."
"No---that's the simple truth. There are different rules for heroes
and royalty, and you're seen as a little of both. You can't be unaware
of that."
Luke frowned and looked away. "I don't know how to be a father to one
child, much less a thousand."
"You wouldn't need to know," she said. "Their mothers wouldn't expect
it. They would be grateful enough for the gift."
"I'd expect it of me," he said, and firmly steered the conversation
back on course. "We were talking about my being an honorary member of
the circle--" "Not honorary," she corrected.
"Novice."
"Novice, then. But there's an exception in your oath for people like
me?"
"Every adept has the right to judge and the duty to teach," she said.
"I've made my judgment."
"And the rest?" Luke asked. "We've had many hours together--why
haven't you started to teach me?"
"But I have," she said. "I've asked you to think about what you know
and believe. To go beyond that, the novice must ask for the door to be
opened. But you aren't ready to think of yourself as a student
again--not yet. You run too well and easily to go back to crawling."
"No," Luke said, shaking his head. "To be a Jedi is to be a seeker. A
Jedi is always learning. It's only on the dark side that one becomes
obsessed with knowing, and impressed with doing."
"There's a touch of the dark side," Akanah said slowly, "in the way you
cling to the privilege of killing, and resist the teaching I've offered
you. A hint of a mind that has settled on answers and resents b eing
challenged with new questions."
Luke toyed with the lacing on his longshirt as he considered her
words.
"You may be right," he said finally.
"I found the Force at a time when what I needed was power. I wanted a
weapon to protect my friends, not enlightenment. I was thinking of war
against the Empire, not peace with the universe. Perhaps something of
that lingers in how I see myself. I'll think on it."
"Good," she said. "Your words give me hope. And hope is the beginning
of everything worthwhile."
Luke sat up and turned toward her. "Akanah--I do want you to teach
me," he said. "I want to learn to read scribing. You were able to
help me see it. Can you teach me to see it without your help?"
"Yes. But that isn't the first lesson," she said. "That will come
later."
"Don't you think there's reason enough to change the curriculum?"
"What reason?"
"Insurance," Luke said. "If we're going to follow your way, the marked
way, to the circle, finding and reading the signs left in the Current
is crucial. But if only one of us can read them--" "I won't miss any
signs," Akanah said, shaking her head. "Or misread them."
"What if we become separated? You said that in your mind, I'm
Fallanassi. If that's so, then these signs are meant for me as
well."
"Commitment must be based on more than need," Akanah said. "I'm
sorry.
The time isn't right for what you ask."
Luke frowned. "Are you afraid that I'll go off and try to finish this
journey without you?"
"No," said Akanah. "Would you allow your student's impatience to
dictate the sequence and timing of his instruction? Would you give him
the secret that could most compromise you before he had affirmed the
principles that most define you?"
"Do you want me to take the oaths of the circle, tOO?"
"Yes," she said. "But only when you're ready, and you are not
ready--and only for the right reason, and this is not the right
"Then how can I give you the assurances you want?
How do I show you that I'm ready?"
"Choose to leave your weapon behind when we land at Atzerri," she
said.
"If you do that, you will have shown me something. That would be a
beginning."
Resting his elbows on his knees, Luke pressed a fist into a cupped hand
and stared down over it at the deck.
"I'll have to think about that, too," he said finally, standing. "If I
do it, I want it to be for the right reason--not just to pay a tutor
for my next lesson."
She smiled warmly. "I knew I was right about you," she said. "You
will be welcomed by the circle, when the time comes."
He nodded, lips pressed together, as he edged between the couches and
toward the bunk. But his face must have said something more to her,
for she stood and called after him, "Are you having doubts about me,
Luke?"
Luke paused, one foot in the bunk's step-up, and looked back. "There
are things I don't understand, and things I wonder about," he said.
"Is that the same as 'having doubts'? I don't know."
"It is," she said. "Why don't you ever ask me about these 'things'?
I'm not afraid of your questions. Are you afraid of my answers?"
"Hardly that."
"Of giving offense with your curiosity, then."
"Perhaps."
"I'm not easily offended. Ask me something now, and perhaps there'll
be one less mystery to trouble your sleep."
Luke turned toward her, bringing both feet back to the deck. "All
right," he said. "How is it you came to buy this ship? Why didn't you
go to Lucazec when you'd saved the price of passage? That had to be
far less than the price you paid for this ship. It seems you could
have gone there years ago. I don't understand why you didn't."
"I almost did, six years ago," she said, with a wistful smile. "I had
the price of passage, as you say. I could have gotten myself to
Ialtra. The temptation was almost beyond resisting."
Luke gestured with one hand. "And?"
"If I had gone, I would have been trapped there," she said. "I
would've been on Lucazec, yes, but I would've been poor again. On
Carratos, at least, there were busy ports, and I knew how to earn
enough to keep some. You saw Lucazec--there's not enough wealth there
to take by theft or marriage, much less by honest work."
"So you waited."
"There was really no choice," Akanah said. "I realized I needed to buy
myself more than passage off Carratos--I needed to buy myself freedom
from ever living like that again. I have nothing but this ship, Luke,
and a few credits--but I have this ship. Though with your perquisites
as a hero, you may not understand how much that means to me."
"No," Luke said. "I understand. I remember what it felt like to be
trapped on Tatooine."
"Then have I answered your question? Do you understand now?"
Luke nodded. "All except for this--when you finally got the ship, why
did you come for me first? Why Coruscant and not Lucazec?"
"Because when I dreamed of returning to Ialtra, you were always there,"
Akanah said gently. "Which puzzled me, until I realized what it meant
that I was supposed to take you with me. That I was to bring you to
the circle. That you belong there."
Almost t
o his surprise, though not to his displeasure, Luke found that
he believed her answers. They had the simple directness of emotional
truth.
But for some reason, they did not make it any easier for him to
sleep.
Chapter 8
"-Talos Spaceport, Atzerri."
Akanah glanced sideways at Luke. "May I? she asked.
"Of course," Luke said with an offering gesture, settling back in the
pilot's couch.
"Talos Spaceport, this is Mud Sloth," Akanah said.
"What's your berth price for twenty meters and under?"
"What currency will you be paying in?"
"New Republic credits," she said.
"Nine hundred for the first two days, including landing fees and
topping your consumables. One hundred a day beyond that. But if
you're staying longer than ten days, we can start you with long-term
rates from the third day."
"Talos, you must have mistaken me for a rube," said Akanah. "Because
those can't be anything but rube rates."
"Those are the published rates as of the first of the month," the
spaceport controller said. "Nine hundred to plop and fill, a hundred a
day for the lockup. I don't have any latitude on that."
"Talos, I said twenty meters, not two hundred," said Akanah. "And I'm
only renting the berth, not buy ing it. So why don't you start again,
and this time try not to be insulting."
"Nine hundred to plop, a hundred a day for the lockup," the controller
repeated. "Do you want it, or not? There aren't that many spaces
available."
"Really? I would have thought all your berths would be empty, seeing
as Skreeka is landing the little stuff for six hundred, with five days'
lockup included."
"Skreeka is run by thieves," the controller said.
"Their lockups have the worst security on the continent."
"You'll have to give us a better reason than that not to go there,"
Akanah said. "After all, you've already tried to rob me."
"One moment, Mud Sloth." A yellow light glowed on the comm display.
"Watch," Akanah said to Luke. "He'll come back with a better offer and
say his supervisor authorized it.
But it's all a matter of how much of his margin he's willing to give up
to keep us from going to Skreeka.
Whatever he comes back with, you can be sure it's above the port's
internal rates-he'll make sure he gets something out of this."
"I didn't think you were so well traveled."
She smiled. "I stayed close to the ports on Carratos, and I listened
well."
"When did you get the quote from Skreeka?"
"Oh, I made it up."
The yellow indicator winked out and was replaced by a green one.
"Talos Spaceport. We see this is your first visit here. My supervisor
doesn't want to see you taken advantage of by those scoundrels at
Skreeka. He's authorized a one-time courtesy rate---five hundred to
land and load up, seventy-five a day. That's the very best I can do
for you, and I'd take it, if I were you. Trust me when I tell you,
we're not making a credit at those prices. And I don't care where you
go, anyone who asks you for less is gonna find some way to get the
difference back from you."
"Thank your supervisor for me," Akanah said. "We accept."
"A good decision," the controller said. "As soon as you transmit your
authorization, we'll put you on the beam."
The indicator turned red, then blacked out completely as Akanah turned
her head toward Luke. "All yours, dear," she said, smiling sweetly.
"We have a reservation."
Docking Bay A13 reminded Luke of a smaller version of the Mos Eisley
facility in which he first encountered the Millennium Falcon. The
design was similar, and the amenities were as old-fashioned--hand
umbilicals, a machine shop without a single tool-and-die droid,
mechanical locks, and no storm cover.
"I can't believe I paid them five hundred for this," Akanah said with
disgust, raising her hands wide. "This berth must be a hundred years
old. It's been paid for twenty times over."
"Discount rates," Luke said, securing the last of the umbilicals to the
Adventurer's three propulsion systems.
"Can't expect luxury accommodations."
"Or to be dealt with honestly. We overpaid by half, or more. I hope
they enjoyed their little joke."
"It doesn't matter," Luke said. "This will do. Shall we take a look
in ship's supplies and see if there's a food pack old enough to fit Mud
Sloth's reprocessor?"
"I'll leave that to you," Akanah said, shouldering her bag. "I have to
go."
Luke emerged from under the repulsorlift "wing" of the skiff. "What
are you talking about?"
"I have to do this by myself," said Akanah.
"Why?"
"If the Fallanassi are here, I must approach them alone," she said.
"If I take you with me, they won't let themselves be found. They won't
see you as I see you.
They'll only see you as an outsider."
"What am I supposed to do while you're off by yourself?"
"You can stay here. I'll come back for you if I find them--you know I
will. And I'll come back to you if I don't."
"What if I don't want to stay here?"
"Then do your own exploring in the city. Go where you like. Do what
pleases you. If you're not here when I return, I'll wait for you,"
Akanah said. "All I ask is that you not follow me. You'd only hinder
our purpose here."
"This doesn't feel right to me," Luke said. "Why can't we go together,
like we did on Lucazec, and Teyr?"
"Because I knew that the circle had left Lucazec, and Norika had left
Teyr," she said. "But I do not know that they have left Atzerri."
"I didn't realize you were embarrassed to be seen with me," Luke said
wryly.
"Please understand--if you leave the docking bay, it will be as Li
Stonn. Yes?"
"Yes."
"But the others can pierce that illusion, just as I did," Akanah
said.
"If we're seen together, or you follow me, they'll think you're a
deceiver, a threat. They'll wait for a chance to approach me when I'm
alone. But if you're recognized, I don't know what they will do. They
might decide to stay hidden from me, fearing I've been turned. They
might even decide to leave Atzerri. We can't risk that. I have to go
alone."
A deep frown creased Luke's face. Everything she said was perfectly
reasonable. But everything she said felt Completely wrong. "I don't
like the idea of us being separated. Especially here."
"Do you still think I need your protection?" she asked. "I've been
living around this kind of petty evil for most of my life. I know
them--street bangers, body slavers, drug dealers, turf warriors,
blackmailers, and the cold-eyes who just enjoy making someone scream.
I got caught a few times and hurt a few times, but I learned. I got
stronger, I got smarter, and I became my own protector.
I'll be fine, Luke."
"All right," Luke said, reluctantly surrendering.
"But I should at least know where you're going--in case you don't come
&nb
sp; back. In case you run into something you're not expecting. Something
not so 'petty'."
"That's fair," she agreed. "But give me enough time to do what I need
to. Promise that you won't come looking for me until--let's say until
I've been gone three days with no word."
Luke shot her a disbelieving look. "Three days?
That's long enough for someone to grab you and be halfway to the Tion
Hegemony."
She laughed. "The last man who tried to grab me only wanted to take me
as far as the alley," she said.
"Three minutes later, he knew he'd made a mistake."
"All right," Luke said. "But I still don't understand why you need
three days."
"I shouldn't," Akanah said. "That's why you should come look for me
then. I'm going to the Pem-blehov District, north of the park."