“Sorry,” I whisper, fighting tears of my own. “That’s all I wanted to hear: sorry.”
She nods briskly, her lips sealed in a firm line. “If it’s okay with you, I’d like to fly down there next week and say it in person.”
My heart races, my hands once again shaking as I lock the phone in a vise-grip. “I … I guess.”
So much going on that I wasn’t prepared for. So much.
“I’ll make arrangements and let you know.” She smiles. “I know this is hard, Dagne. Hell, I’m sweating bullets. So, I’ll let you wrap it up and deal with things one step at a time, huh?”
“That would be good.” I chuckle. “I just wasn’t expecting this … at all.”
“I know.”
We say our goodbyes and Mom disconnects first. I smile at Hooch, his expression mirroring mine.
“Why?”
“Because you deserved an explanation at least.” He stands and crosses over to me as I rise to my feet also. “You know I love you, right?”
“I’ve got no doubt now.” I lean into his embrace, relishing the feel of his arms around me. “But I’ve got something to share, too.”
He pulls back, his arms still looped around my sides as he frowns in confusion. “What?”
“I visited Dr. Phillips yesterday while you were busy in church.” He cocks his head, confused, and it’s all I can do not to blurt it all out in one incoherent sentence. “He gave me a check up, after, you know.” I nod, gesturing to my feminine parts. “I’ve had regular periods, and there’s no pain or scarring, so …”
Hooch’s eyes light up, his face frozen in anticipation.
“I thought we could try for that family you said you’d like.”
“But we aren’t even married?”
I laugh, pressing up on my toes to give him a chaste kiss. “Baby, I don’t care. What’s in a name, anyway?”
I’m with a man I love, one who’s proven his feelings for me over and over through his actions. His heart is in the right place—a little dark at times, but in the right place. He’s incredibly devoted, loving, and loyal.
He’s everything I could want for the father of my children. Why wait when I’m not looking for anything more?
A year ago I was drifting in a sea of indecision, unsure where the winds would blow me next. But out there in that vast nothingness was an island, a sanctuary waiting to be found.
His name is Josiah, and he’s the place I’ve been searching for, the forever home that calls to my heart.
“Let’s get home and start making babies,” I say with a chuckle.
He sweeps me off my feet, growling as he buries his face in my neck. “Hope you’re not too fond of daylight, baby, ’cause you ain’t gonna see it again for a while.”
Perfect.
NEED HELP?
If you, or somebody you love, struggle with mental illness, remember:
It’s okay to say you’re not okay.
Reaching out for help isn’t a weakness, it’s one of the bravest things you can do to admit you have a problem that can’t be ignored. Illnesses such as depression and anxiety have a great way of making you feel as though your problems are inadequate, that nobody cares because they’ve got issues of their own to deal with (trust me, I know this first hand.)
But depression is a liar.
People do care. Maybe it’s somebody close to you, or perhaps it’s a complete stranger on the other end of a helpline, but I promise you,
somebody does care.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, like there’s no possible way this storm can pass, or that you can’t see how things will get any better,
MAKE A CALL.
AUSTRALIA:
Lifeline: 13 11 14
Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636
UNITED STATES:
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
CANADA:
Alberta Crisis Line – All Ages: 403-266-4357
British Columbia Crisis Line – All Ages: 1-800-SUICIDE
Manitoba Crisis Line – All Ages: 1-877-435-7170
New Brunswick Crisis Line – All Ages: 1-800-667-5005
Newfoundland and Labrador Line All Ages: 1-888-737-4668
Nova Scotia Crisis Line – All Ages: 1-888-429-8167
Ontario Crisis Line – All Ages: 1-866-531-2600
Prince Edward Island Crisis Line – All Ages: 1-800-218-2885
Quebec National Crisis Line – All Ages: 1-866-277-3553
Saskatchewan Crisis Line – All Ages: 1-306-525-5333
Yukon Crisis Line – All Ages: 7 pm-12 am (PST) 1-844-533-3030
NEW ZEALAND:
LifeLine NZ: 0800 543 354
UNITED KINGDOM:
CHILDLINE: 0800-1111
Family Line: 0808-800-5678
Papyrus Hopeline: 0870-1704000
The Samaritans: 08457-90-90-90
HAVEN’T MET THE REST OF THE FALLEN ACES?
Then grab your copy here, at a special price for a short time only. All three full-length novels in one handy box set.
99c or read with Kindle Unlimited.
ALSO BY MAX
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FALLEN ACES MC SERIES
Unrequited
Tormented
Existential
COMING SOON
Redundant
Misguided
BUTCHER BOYS SERIES
Devil You Know
Devil on Your Back
Devil May Care
Devil in the Detail
Devil Smoke
BANJAXED SERIES
Pistol
Loaded
Recoil
STANDALONE
Malaise
COMING SOON
Tough Love
OTHERWORLD DESIRES (Paranormal)
Battle to Become
Methods for Mayhem
THE MUSIC
Listen to the songs that inspired the book here: http://spoti.fi/2p3w9Ys
“Wanted Man” - The Last Internationale
“Open My Eyes” - Rival Sons
“Hater” - Korn
“Hell's Bells” - Cary Ann Hearst, Butch Walker, Jake Sinclair
“Waiting Around to Die” - Quiet Life, Jim James
“Tear Away” - Drowning Pool
“The Day The Word Went Away” - Nine Inch Nails
“Family” - Noah Gundersen
“Paralyzed” - Failure Anthem
“Waiting All Night” - Rudimental, Ella Eyre
“Rooms on Fire” - Stevie Knicks
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
As always, foremost my family. Love you all so much <3 Here’s to finding that balance :*
Thank you to everybody who fell in love with Hooch from his introduction back in the Butcher Boys series. He’s a complex soul, one who I feel a connection to, and I knew he’d deserve his own story.
To the team that makes this possible: from finding the perfect cover image by Ian Pettigrew of Travis Cadeau (Everyone agrees you make a perfect Hooch), to the design by Sara Eirew, through to the edits by Ellie McLove (cheers for the short notice ;) ), and the beta read by Abbey Neil-Clark. Every step of the process is an important one, and I thank you all for your part.
To the bloggers—thank you as always for your support and donating your time to share the word. Your effort doesn’t go unnoticed, and I’m truly grateful.
If you are a blogger, and would like to be a part of any future sign-ups and exclusive content shares, then hop on over and join my Blogger only group on Facebook here.
As always, I’m behind on sleep and probably forgot the kids had to take something special to school today, so until next time, happy reading <3
Onto the next . . .
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Born and bred in
Canterbury, New Zealand, Max now resides with her family in beautiful and sunny Queensland, Australia.
Life with two young children can be hectic at times, and although she may not write as often as she would like, Max wouldn’t change a thing.
In her down time, Max can be found at her local gym, brain-storming through a session with the weights. If not, she’s probably out drooling over one of many classic cars on show that she wished she owned.
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