As always, thanks to all of my friends for giving me someone to discuss these cool things with, my mother and sister for taking time out of doing great things themselves to cheer me on, and a lady named Andrea whom I asked to dance a few years ago and, to my great fortune, haven’t yet trod on the toes of enough to end that dance.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
M.E. CASTLE is a New York City–raised writer and actor living in Washington, DC. He is the author of the beloved Clone Chronicles, which introduced the world to Fisher Bas and his clones, a flying pig, and a large supporting cast of robots, aliens, and a very proper talking toaster. When not writing, he can be found performing the works of Shakespeare onstage, which has given him the expertise necessary to create this utterly scholarly and serious work. You can sign up for email updates here.
ABOUT THE ILLUSTRATOR
DANIEL JENNEWEIN has been drawing since kindergarten, where he could mainly be found drawing skulls and hooks, to the irritation of some adults. He works as a freelance illustrator and art director in Frankfurt. His picture books include Is Your Buffalo Ready for Kindergarten? (written by Audrey Vernick, 2010), Teach Your Buffalo to Play Drums (written by Audrey Vernick, 2011), and Chick-o-Saurus Rex (written by Lenore Jennewein, 2013). Visit him online at Danieljennewein.com, or sign up for email updates here.
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CONTENTS
Title Page
Copyright Notice
Dedication
Prologue
Chapter 1: The Day that Couldn’t Get Any Worse—So It Got Badder Instead
Chapter 2: Note to Self: When the Doorbell Rings—Run!
Chapter 3: Correction: EVERYTHING Stinks
Chapter 4: Babies May Shift during Flight
Chapter 5: Hisssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Chapter 6: Real Boys Aren’t Afraid to Wear Tights
Chapter 7: Where There’s a Graveyard, There’s a … Ghost?
Chapter 8: Of Accordions and Kings
Chapter 9: Walk Like a Ghost!
Chapter 10: Pee-EW!
Chapter 11: Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, Skunkblossoms Smell—Just Like You!
Chapter 12: A Rustle in the Bushes Is Never a Good Sign …
Chapter 13: The Skull and Crossbones Isn’t a Good Sign, Either
Chapter 14: Okay, Something Evil Is Definitely Happening in Denmark!
Chapter 16: The Return of Prince Hammie
Chapter 17: Caught Rotten-Handed!
Chapter 18: Ghost Attack!
Chapter 19: They All Lived Happily Ever After … Except the Ghost, Who Was Not Alive
Chapter 20: The End?
Acknowledgments
About the Author
About the Illustrator
Copyright
Copyright © 2017 by Paper Lantern Lit
A part of Macmillan Children’s Publishing Group
175 Fifth Avenue, New York, New York 10010
mackids.com
All rights reserved.
Who so taketh this, my book,
And doth not ask, their brains shall cook,
Their eyes shall freeze, and bees shall please
To jab and stab their crooked knees.
Where their story after goes,
The Narrator shall then compose.
Beware his prose.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.
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Imprint logo designed by Amanda Spielman
Illustrations by Daniel Jennewein
First hardcover edition 2017
eBook edition May 2017
eISBN 9781250101587