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    Yellow Mini

    Page 2
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    Her hands dance

      across the keys

      And I always wonder what she sees:

      a forest of silver trees

      or a frosted moonscape

      of sparkling craters,

      the perfect place

      for her music to soar

      above the galaxy?

      Con Forza

      With force

      Mary

      My piano teacher is pushing me

      to audition for the Talent Show.

      It’s like a conspiracy,

      everyone wanting me to play.

      He says:

      It’s a shame not to share

      your music with the world.

      It’s like a painter

      never showing her art

      or a poet never reading her words.

      My mom says:

      Why did we pay for all those lessons

      if you won’t play in public?

      My dad says:

      Listen to your mom!

      I say:

      When I’m not playing

      parts of me drift, like notes

      lifted off the bars, floating

      aimlessly in space.

      Isn’t it enough that I feel best

      when I’m playing, that playing

      makes me feel most like the me

      I was meant to be?

      Isn’t that worth your money, Mother,

      or would you rather see me

      in pieces, lost, with nothing

      to make me whole?

      Lucky

      Stacey

      I know I’m not Mark’s first girlfriend,

      but I think he likes me best.

      The rest were all too clingy, always wanting

      him to call and take them to the mall.

      They didn’t understand that Mark

      needs to keep moving

      and only he can decide

      where he wants to go.

      Sure, he wants you beside him

      but you’ve got to be willing

      to bend in and buckle up

      and put up with his moods,

      ride them out with him,

      no matter where they lead.

      Sometimes, we drive all the way

      to the border, where

      he’ll park and stare

      as though he’s plotting

      his escape.

      At moments like that

      you have to sit still, keep

      your mouth shut and wait

      until he’s worked it out.

      Then he comes back

      and sees you

      and remembers

      how lucky he is

      to have you there,

      all pretty and sexy

      in your tightest clothes.

      You can feel him shift

      toward you, his eyes

      glossy, his pants straining.

      You’ve waited hours for that look

      because it makes you feel

      a thousand feet tall,

      even though he still hasn’t

      said a single word.

      Just Because

      Christopher

      My friends tell me

      to forget it.

      Girls like her

      don’t go out

      with guys

      like me.

      They say it

      like I have

      a disease,

      Just because

      I’m shy

      like them

      And good at school

      and belong to

      the AV Club

      like them

      And have acne

      like some

      of them.

      None of those things

      mean I don’t

      have feelings.

      Even Galileo

      knew that all things

      fall at the same rate

      Whether they’re

      light as

      feathers

      Or heavy

      as stone,

      like me.

      Social Action Group

      Annabelle

      I’ve been seeing signs for their meetings

      since school started: kids

      at sewing machines, kids

      outside tin shacks, kids

      weaving carpets, kids

      bent over in fields; underneath,

      the words Do you care?

      Yesterday, I finally found the nerve

      to go to the meeting

      in the small room

      with no windows

      behind the boiler

      in the basement.

      Mr. Dawe wears cargo pants

      with a hundred pockets,

      sandals, and t-shirts

      with slogans like Ban the bomb

      and Make love, not war, and

      his gray hair is a skinny ponytail

      down his back.

      When I walk in, he says

      Welcome, comrade,

      and the five kids sitting

      in a circle on the floor

      laugh and say hello

      and I have never felt

      so welcome in my life.

      Mr. Dawe talks with his hands,

      waving them around

      like he is conducting

      an orchestra; we are

      the musicians, rehearsing

      a score, making plans

      for a booth on child labour

      and the war in Iraq.

      Why not plant two flowers

      with one seed? Mr. Dawe asks

      and I think how, if my mom

      had said that, she’d have used

      the one about killing birds

      with a single stone.

      These kids

      Mr. Dawe

      These kids turn me on—Hey,

      get your minds out of the gutter!

      I mean in an intellectual way:

      the way they think, the things they care about.

      It’s not all Hollywood superstars

      and fashion and fast cars.

      Well, at least not for these committed kids

      who come to the weekly meetings in that crap room.

      If the school really cared about education, as in

      the Latin educere, to lead, they’d put their money

      Where their proverbial mouths are and give us some cash

      for a better space and a computer.

      They just don’t get that these kids might be

      the Kings, the Ghandis, the Mandelas, the Suu Kyis

      Of their generation; it has been a complete

      privilege for me to work alongside them.

      I’d rather be with them and their energy and spirit

      than sit through protocol and curriculum meetings

      With my colleagues. Some of them are more burnt

      out than lava and haven’t had a new thought

      In their heads since they rolled off the assembly line

      at college, diplomas in their fists, forty years ago.

      It’s like there’s some fascist policy up there that says

      IF IT TURNS KIDS ON, IT’S GOT TO BE BAD FOR THEM.

      When John Lennon said, Whatever gets you through the night

      he meant night as a metaphor for any hard place, like school.

      I know that. These kids know it. Why not get through

      AND change the world in the process?

      MY STEEL SHELL

      Mark

      When I drive to school

      I always hope

      people are standing around

    &n
    bsp; because no one can help

      looking at my yellow Mini.

      It’s bright as the sun,

      speedy and slick.

      I weave it in and out

      of those concrete pillars

      meant to slow cars down

      on school property.

      We’re supposed to brake,

      but I just twist around them

      smooth as a snake.

      Sometimes people clap,

      but not the principal.

      When she sees me

      she calls me in

      and gives me

      a lecture

      on safety

      on being responsible

      on how a car isn’t a toy

      but a machine that has the power

      to kill, as if I don’t know that.

      She sounds like my mother

      warning me about speed:

      Haven’t I lost enough already?

      Mom always says.

      Don’t they know that when I’m in

      my yellow Mini I’m safe,

      impervious?

      The car is my thick skin

      and when I’m

      in it nothing,

      nothing,

      can sink

      in.

      My Dad

      Annabelle

      I can’t help wondering what he

      was like, or is like, because he’s not dead,

      he’s just not here, in my life.

      My mom tells me I don’t need

      to know him, that knowing him

      wouldn’t change who I am.

      But how does she know that? It’s like

      the one about the tree falling in the forest

      when no one is there to hear it. Doesn’t it still fall?

      I guess I’m kind of like the tree, only

      my father isn’t around to see me.

      Maybe I’d grow differently if he were.

      My mom grew up near here, so I might

      have passed my dad a million times,

      maybe even handed him a flyer at the mall.

      If I did, I wonder what he did with it: did he read it,

      or ditch it? Is he the type of guy who cares about things

      like child labour? Does the world keep him up at night

      Or is he the type of guy who only cares about hockey

      and football, watching TV with a beer in one hand,

      a cigarette in the other, swearing at the screen?

      Either way, I’d like to know because it might help me

      figure myself out, it might help me see what kind

      of life I’ll have when I’m older, not that I expect

      To become exactly like my mom or dad, but

      it would be nice to know that I inherited some traits,

      instead of feeling everything about me starts at zero.

      Ostinato

      Persistent

      Mary

      I hear her, tip-toeing

      down the stairs,

      crouching

      In the stairwell, like

      an intruder,

      trying

      To figure out what’s keeping me

      down here for

      hours.

      It’s like she thinks I can’t

      hear her

      breathing

      Or scratching her hair, or tapping

      her fingers on

      her knees

      Like she’s a human metronome

      decoding my music

      in the dark.

      Things She Doesn’t Want to Know

      Annabelle

      My mom says:

      Why don’t you hang out

      with Stacey anymore?

      You used to be over there all the time

      and now, nothing. Has something happened

      that you’re not telling me about?

      She thinks I put Stacey off by telling her

      things she doesn’t want to know

      about the clothes she wears.

      As if I would.

      I don’t even speak to Stacey anymore,

      but I can’t help it if she reads our posters.

      It’s the type of info my mother thinks

      I should keep to myself because

      it won’t win me any friends.

      My mom says Mr. Dawe is a leftover hippie.

      She can tell by the fluff between his toes

      that he shows off in Birkenstocks, and

      by his shirts that never smell clean

      but are rumpled and musty.

      She says he shouldn’t encourage us to protest

      like that in public, that it might harm

      our image, prevent us from

      getting summer jobs.

      I say some things are more important

      than money.

      The school agrees with my mom

      and they’ve told Mr. Dawe not to

      take us off school property,

      as if we belong to the school, like

      the gym mats or desks.

      Don’t they know we have

      our own free will?

      Sure, Mr. Dawe led us there, but now

      we are ready to go ahead,

      even without him.

      Poem

      Christopher

      I need to send her

      a sign to tell

      her

      How I feel because

      until I do

      I am

      Just some guy she walks by,

      blended in,

      instead

      Of a guy who is bursting

      with feeling

      for her.

      I need to put myself

      in her sphere, her

      orbit

      Like one of

      Jupiter’s

      small moons.

      I could write a poem

      comparing her to a

      flower,

      The perfect rosy petals

      of her cheeks

      blushing,

      The delicate stems of her

      fingers waving when

      she talks

      About things she really

      cares about,

      fiery

      As a rose in full bloom,

      each velvet petal

      folding

      One on top of the other

      the way I’d like

      to fold

      Annabelle

      in my

      arms.

      This New Guy

      Annabelle

      On Saturday, this new guy

      shows up and he doesn’t know

      how to persist when people

      reject the flyer.

      I tell him:

      You have to

      stick it under an arm

      or on top of a bag.

      You have to

      act like it’s the most

      important paper ever printed.

      You have to

      push when pushing

      is against your nature.

      You have to

      smile even when someone

      is cursing you.

      You have to

      stay hopeful even when you see

      your flyers crushed

      Under the wheels

      of a thousand

      cars,

      Which is not

      always easy

      to do.

      Trying to Change the World

      Christopher

      I can’t get the hang

      of standingand handing

      out the flyers.


      I feel I am

      being rude

      when I say:

      Do you know this store

      buys from suppliers

      who use sweatshops?

      I can’t stand

      seeing people’s eyes

      hit the ground,

      or the way they

      tuck in their chins

      and skulk through

      the doors,

      some grasping

      the flyers, others

      waving them away

      like wasps.

      I try to study

      Annabelle

      to see how she

      does it, her technique

      as smooth as honey,

      always pleasant,

      like she is handing

      out candy

      and not bad news.

      Once or twice she smiles

      at me, nods

      to encourage me,

      and it makes the day

      worthwhile,

      makes me glad

      to be standing

      in the October cold

      trying to change

      the world.

      Watching her flick

      her hair

      out of her eyes

      and blow the tips

      of her fingers

      to keep warm

      makes me want

      to wrap

      myself around her

      like the fuzzy blanket

      my mom bought

      at this store

      last week.

      At the end of the day,

      frozen, we all stop off

      for hot chocolate.

      When Annabelle

      blows a hole into

      the whipped cream,

      a dab of it clings

      to her upper lip.

      I want

      to lick it off.

      The Truth

      Annabelle

      My mom says people don’t always want

      to know the truth.

      She says if everyone knew the truth

      about everything

      In the world, no one would ever

      get out of bed.

      But what if knowing just a piece

      of the truth

      Changes one little thing that a person

      does or thinks?

      Like the challenge Mr. Dawe

      just gave me

      For our Hallowe’en info-booth

      in the lobby.

      This is one piece I’ve discovered

      so far:

      Factories in Bangladesh

      are full of kids whose fingers

      bleed. They sleep

      on planks in dorms,

      their stomachs rumbling.

     


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