They walked out into the morning, past Cocteau, who was still talking to his spellbound friends.
Paris didn’t seem like a city of darkness to Archie.
It seemed wonderful.
Epilogue
But . . . it never happened!” said Peter van Diemen.
“It might have.”
“Well, anything might have. But where’s your evidence?”
“Cocteau was in Paris. He went to places like Le Chat Qui Fume with Morand and other friends. . . .”
“But we don’t know that your grandfather was ever even in Paris. Let alone that he met Cocteau.”
“I’m not saying he met him.”
Peter’s expression showed how little he thought of such hair-splitting. “You can’t simply invent things.”
“How do you account for his behavior then? The decision to volunteer. The fascination with Paris. The refusal to return to his wife.”
“I don’t have an explanation. A few speculations, perhaps.”
“Like what?”
“Well . . .” He laid a postcard on the table. “This was in the documents you gave me.”
The photo side showed a naked baby, facedown on a rug. I turned it over. Someone had written in a studied, looping hand, “To My Daling Dady From his Darling little daughter Stella Baxter 74 Catherine St Leichhardt June 10th 1917 Send me a big doll dad.” It was addressed simply “Private W A Baxter on active Service abroad.”
“This must be my aunt then,” I said. “Dad’s little sister. We always called her Mary.”
I tried to square this infant with the bulky lady who’d been a fixture of my childhood and adolescence.
“Do you know when she was born?” van Diemen asked.
“No idea. From the look of this card, about 1916.”
“1917. February 6, to be precise.”
“So?”
“This would mean that, assuming a normal pregnancy, she was conceived in May of 1916. Archie volunteered in May 1916.”
“Meaning . . . ?”
“Getting your wife pregnant doesn’t suggest a man who wanted to cut all ties with his family. Quite the reverse, in fact. He would have sailed in October knowing she was expecting.”
He sorted through the papers.
“Another thing . . . I found this.”
It was a smudged copy of a three-line death notice from a newspaper.
BAXTER. June 2, 1913, at his parents’ residence, 11 Catherine-street, Leichhardt, Claude Hector Robert, dearly-loved infant son of Mr. and Mrs. Archie Baxter, aged 5 weeks. “A bud In heaven.”
“The house number is wrong.”
“How many Archie Baxters can there be on one street?”
“So my grandfather lost a son, almost at birth?”
“Not one. Three.” Another paper. “This is his death certificate. He was sixty-one. Cause of death—auricular fibrillation, myocarditis, and hypertension. And look; under ‘children of the marriage,’ it lists John, your father; Neville, your uncle; and Stella Mary, your aunt, as living and ‘3 males, deceased.’ ”
He laid his hand on the papers.
“You know what I see here? A man who suffered a great deal of loss. Three sons dead in infancy. From what you say, a difficult domestic situation. A job he didn’t like. I see a man with a tendency to high blood pressure; probably inclined to mood swings; not an easy man to get on with.”
“My cousins tell me the same thing. My father too. He had to move away from home as a boy, to live with another family.”
“Some men respond to stress and loss by remaining and accepting. Some grieve and brood. Some run away. I would guess Archie belonged to that last group. He left his father’s farm for the city. He left his wife for France . . .”
“And when he came back, he left her again, to try running his own business.”
“I found out something about that too. You said he made condiments? Remember the branch of your family that set up a successful business in Scotland making canned goods and preserves? Look at this.”
It was a printout from the Wikipedia entry for the Baxter company.
Baxters is an international food company, based in Fochabers, Moray, Scotland. It has its roots in a grocer’s shop opened by George Baxter in 1868. Baxter’s shop became known for supplying pickles and preserves in the early 20th century, when Baxter’s son and daughter-in-law began preparing their own beetroot and selling it to other grocers.
“Pickles and preserves. Not far from condiments.”
I remembered that someone told me Archie made very good pickled onions.
“You think he was trying to repeat what his . . . uncle? cousin? . . . achieved?”
“Don’t you think it’s possible?”
“Yes, it’s possible. But what about la cité des ténèbres and San fairy ann?”
“Things he read. Things he heard. Who knows? Every life is a mystery. Sometimes one has to embrace the inexplicable.”
When I got home, I walked out on our terrace and looked across the roofs of Paris toward Notre Dame.
Archie had never lived in France. But here I was, two generations later, with a French wife and daughter and an apartment in the heart of Paris—a city in which I had never meant to settle but to which I had been drawn from the other side of the world.
Drawn by what? A gene? A fragment, lodged somewhere in the genetic record, of my grandfather’s need for another and better life in a country far from his own?
I might never know what Archie hoped to find in Paris or what he had found here. If it was to forget his life and family, to start again as his own man, he had come to the wrong place. In the city of Cocteau and Proust, the past was as real as the present. This is a city that remembered. Far from rejecting pain, it embraced it, transformed it. I loved it for that—loved it as one preserves the memory of lost loves and remembers with nostalgia rather than regret the illusions of youth. I loved it as had Rimbaud. He spoke for all us newcomers when he wrote in “The Drunken Boat”:
If there is one water in Europe I want, it is the
Black cold pool where into the scented twilight
A child squatting full of sadness, launches
A boat as fragile as a butterfly in May.
Acknowledgments
Our family is typical in having preserved too little of its past. What has been saved is due to the efforts of my brother, Philip, and my sister, Virginia, without whom it would not have been possible to write this book. Thanks are also due to Robyn Lopes, my cousin on my mother’s side, for her meticulous documentation.
In London, Mary Troath was, as always, the most creative and indefatigable of researchers. I’m grateful to Neil Hornick for the generous access to his archives and for his cordial elucidation of the complexities of British society. In Australia, Michael Caulfield was unstinting with his time, expertise, and friendship. I’m particularly grateful to the Australian War Memorial and the National Archives of Australia, Canberra, for assistance and advice. In Paris, Dr. Barbara Santich, by inviting me to her lecture at the Australian embassy in Paris, brought this book a giant step closer to fruition. Simon Gallo at the American Library in Paris kindly arranged access to its files of Stars and Stripes. Thanks to my longtime editor at HarperCollins, Peter Hubbard, and to my agent, Jonathan Lloyd. I’m also grateful to the many others at Harper who have labored on my behalf, among them: Cole Hager, Amy Baker, Cal Morgan, Milan Bozic, Julie Hersh, Fritz Metsch, Gregory Henry, and Sarah Woodruff. And to “Peter van Diemen,” as he prefers to be known, my most heartfelt thanks. Ein Gespenst ist noch wie eine Stelle, dran dein Blick mit einem Klange stößt.
Index
The pagination of this electronic edition does not match the edition from which it was created. To locate a specific entry, please use your e-book reader’s search tools.
Page numbers in italics refer to illustrations.
Adams, Franklin P., 360
Aeneid, The (Virgil), 66
Aeropolis (Kistemaeckers), 101
–2, 102
Agence Iris, 260–61, 263
Aix-les-Bains, 247–48
Alain-Fournier, 64
A la Recherche du Temps Perdu (Proust), 33
Albaret, Odilon, 207
Albert, Prince, 175, 277
alcohol, 152–53, 230, 306–7
absinthe, 84, 229–30
wine, see wine
All Quiet on the Western Front (Remarque), 14–15, 149–51, 150
Alsace, 45, 47–49, 48, 99, 105, 134, 143, 144, 172
American Civil War, 25, 347, 361
American Expeditionary Force (AEF), 160
American Library Association, 354, 355
American Library in Paris (ALP), 355, 359
Americans, 313–19, 355–57, 360–61, 363
doughboys, 42, 148, 247–48, 255, 268–69, 314, 353
American Volunteer Corps, 158–59
Angel of Mons, 325
Annales des Maladies Vénériennes, 181
années folles, les, 362
Antoninus, 37–38
ANZAC (Australian and New Zealand Army Corps), 30, 76
Anzac Day, 72, 169
apaches, 316
Apollinaire, Guillaume, 292, 296, 298, 374
Aragon, Louis, 296
Armstrong, W. Watson, 191
Arnoux, Guy, 313–14, 316
Around the World in Eighty Days (Verne), 290
artists, 146–47, 151
art nouveau, 57–58, 59
Arwr, Yr (Hedd Wyn), 303–4
Assiette au Beurre, L’, 283, 284
Auric, George, 292
Austra-bloody-laise, The (Dennis), 163
Australia, 106–7, 114, 118–19
Australian Imperial Force (AIF), 18, 111, 167, 173, 242, 270, 271
Australian volunteers, 163–74
Australian War Memorial, 119, 203–4
aviation, 100, 101–2, 102
aviators, 285–86
Bach, Johann Sebastian, 177
Baïonnette, La, 146, 180, 180, 195, 196, 210, 234, 238–39, 244, 254, 264, 313–14, 315
Balaclava, 25
Ballets Russes, 32, 85, 217–19
banks, 155
Banque de France, 142
Barbier, George, 231–32
Barbusse, Henri, Under Fire (Le Feu), 212, 213–14
Barney, Nathalie Clifford, 83–84
Bateau-Lavoir, 63
Battle of Dorking, The: Reminiscences of a Volunteer (Chesney), 101
Baudelaire, Charles, 84, 336, 364
Baxter, Archie, 13, 18, 38, 67–69, 71–78, 72, 75, 87, 90–91, 107–8, 110–11, 112–14, 117, 118, 163–66, 174, 185, 193, 199, 221–22, 227, 229, 300, 305, 306, 339, 345–52, 378–83
documents on, 163–64, 202–6, 379, 380
in London, 267–68, 270–71, 277, 279–81
in Paris, 364–77, 378, 383
varicose veins of, 206, 227–28, 308–9
wedding photograph of, 108
Baxter, James, 109–10
Baxter, Stella Madden, 72, 73, 75, 77–78, 108, 108, 109, 110, 202
Baxter family, 66–67, 109–10, 381
Beach, Sylvester, 153–54
Beach, Sylvia, 83, 154
Beaumont, Edith de, 236, 292, 339, 340, 356
Beaumont, Etienne de, 9–11, 12, 292, 339, 340, 356
Beethoven, Ludwig van, 177, 182–83
Begbie, Harold, 274
Belgium, 181, 182, 216, 277, 323
Bell, Clive, 330–31
Bell, J. X., 331–32
belle époque, la, 57
Bellows, George, 234–35, 235
Berlin, Irving, 71
Binyon, Laurence, 139–40
Birdwood, William, 272–73
Biron, Gaston, 215
Bismarck, Otto von, 44
black French soldier guarding German prisoners, 346
Black Sun Press, 154, 333
Bleak House (Dickens), 278
Blighty, 268
Boer War, 24, 35, 171–72
Bohème, La (Puccini), 82
Bonnot gang, 63, 64
boulevardier style, 287–88
bouquinistes, 121–22
“Bowman, The” (Machen), 325–26
Boyle, Kay, 333–34
Brancion, 122–28, 129
Braque, Georges, 63, 297
Breton, André, 89, 296
Brewer, Hector, 294–95
Bridges, Robert, 24
Brittain, Vera, 204–5
brocantes, 194–200
Brooke, Rupert, 22–24, 22, 30
Brophy, John, 20
Brown, “Panama” Al, 32
Bruyere, Georges, 55–56
Bullard, Eugene, 153, 159, 285, 286
Bulletin, The, 115
Burrawang, 190
cafard, 259, 263
Cap de Bonne-Espérance, Le (Cocteau), 302, 340–43
Carlton, Harry, 194
Carlyon, Les, 115
Castellane, Paul Ernest Boniface “Boni,” Marquis de, 81
Catton Hall, 306
Cavell, Edith, 30, 234–36, 235, 243
Céline, Louis-Ferdinand, 282
Ceramic, 164, 165, 167, 172, 205
Cerne Abbas Giant, 225
Chabanais, Le, 82–83
Chanel, Coco, 33, 209–10
Chaplin, Charlie, 219, 307, 356
Charters, Jimmie, 288, 314
Charters, John, 325
Chauvel, Harry, 203
Chekhov, Anton, v
Chesney, George Tomkyns, 101
Chinese embassy, 155–56
Chronique Médicale, 182
Churchill, Winston, 1, 35
cigarettes, 230–31, 231, 360–61
Cinderella (Perrault), 258
Civil War, 25, 347, 361
Clare (friend), 311–12, 320
Clemenceau, Georges, 98
Cocteau, Jean, 9–11, 10, 15, 29, 31–38, 42, 62, 86, 138, 143, 207, 208, 215–16, 238, 289, 290, 339, 344, 374, 377, 378, 383
Le Cap de Bonne-Espérance, 302, 340–43
opium addiction of, 60–61, 61
Parade, 217–19, 289–99
Codford, 205, 224, 225–26, 226, 228, 229
Cody, Buffalo Bill, 316, 356
Cohan, George M., 310
Colette, 240
Colonel Blimp, 30
Conan Doyle, Arthur, 201, 321–22
The Land of Mist, 321, 322, 328
condoms, 199–200
“Congo, The” (Lindsay), 357
conscientious objectors, 275–76
Coolidge, Calvin, 141
Coward, Noël, 191, 221
Cowley, Malcolm, 25–26, 35, 37, 161–62, 217
Crane, Stephen, 7
Crosby, Caresse, 154, 333, 335
Crosby, Harry, 154, 332–35
cummings, e.e., 154, 241–42, 292
Curran, James, 166, 248–49
Danton, Georges, 45
Darmon, Pierre, 284
Debussy, Claude, 57
Denis, Saint, 323
Dennis, C. J., 107–8, 163
Départ des Poilus, Août, Le (Herter), 137–38, 137
Deserted Village, The (Goldsmith), 185
Diaghilev, Sergei, 85, 217, 219, 289, 290, 292, 296
Dickens, Charles, 278
diggers, 114–15, 116–17, 120
d’Indy, Vincent, 331
Dingo Bar, 288
Dishonored, 234
Disney, Walt, 154
Doctor Zhivago (Pasternak), 111
Dos Passos, John, 154, 214
doughboys, 42, 148, 247–48, 255, 268–69, 314, 353
“Dreams of France” (Gellert), 174
Dreyfus, Alfred, 43–44
Drosso, 335
drugs, 84–85, 336
opium, 60–61, 61, 84, 335
“Drunken Boat, The” (Rimbaud), 282, 383
Dunne, John Gregory
, 58
Edward VII, King, 83
Edward the Confessor, 83
Elgar, Edward, 177
Eliot, T. S., 92, 124
Enormous Room, The (cummings), 154
Entertainments National Service Association (ENSA), 308
Esperanto, 64–65
espionage, 179, 180–81, 180, 312, 314–16, 336–37
Esquire, 363
Europe, James Reese, 247, 296, 356, 358–59, 358
Evans, Ellis, 303–4
Exploits d’une Petite Française, Les, 291
Fairbanks, Douglas, 216
faiseuses des anges, 266
Fall-In (Begbie), 274
Falls, Charles Buckles, 353
Farewell to Arms, A (Hemingway), 154, 238
Farjeon, Eleanor, 113–14
fashion, 208–14, 209, 211, 216–17, 287–88
Feu, Le (Under Fire) (Barbusse), 212, 213–14
Field of Dreams, 110–11
Figaro, Le, 177
Finnegans Wake (Joyce), 87, 333
Fitzgerald, F. Scott, 288, 357
Flament, Albert, 337–38
Flanders, 19–20, 21, 38, 227
flâneur style, 287–88
Folies Bergère, 252–53, 294–95
food shortages, 300–302
Foreign Legion, 113, 153, 158, 159, 331–32
“For the Fallen” (Binyon), 139–40
fourbancier, 149
Fournier, Henri-Alban, 64
Franco-Prussian War, 25, 39, 47, 101
Franz Ferdinand, Archduke, 103–4
fräuleins, 178–81, 180, 314–15
French 75, 6
froussards, 142
Fuchs, Leonhart, 176
Gaines, Ruth, 330
Gallant, Mavis, 253–54
Gallieni, Joseph-Simon, 8, 14, 30, 49–54, 51, 152, 323
Gallipoli, 30, 118, 272
Gallo, Simon, 359
gambling, 168–69, 238–39
Gammage, Bill, 227
Gare de l’Est, 130, 131, 133, 134, 135–37, 148
Garros, Roland, 31, 216, 340–42, 340, 344, 375
gas poisoning, 204–5, 305–6, 351
Gaudier-Brzeska, Henri, 151–52
Gay, Noel, 39
Gellert, Leon, 173–74
Genet, Jean, 32
Geneviève, Saint, 323
George, Saint, 325–26
George V, King, 175, 277
Germans, 146–48, 175–78, 181–82, 216, 323