Jurgen: A Comedy of Justice

  45.

  The Faith of Guenevere

  Very fair was this woman to look upon, with her shining gray eyes andsmall smiling lips, a fairer woman might no man boast of having seen.And she regarded Jurgen graciously, with her cheeks red and white, verylovely to observe. She was clothed in a robe of flame-colored silk, andabout her neck was a collar of red gold. And she told him, quite asthough she spoke with a stranger, that she was Queen Guenevere.

  "But Lancelot is turned monk, at Glastonbury: and Arthur is goneinto Avalon," says she: "and I will be your wife if you will haveme, Jurgen."

  And Jurgen saw that Guenevere did not know him at all, and that evenhis name to her was meaningless. There were a many ways of accountingfor this: but he put aside the unflattering explanation that she hadsimply forgotten all about Jurgen, in favor of the reflection that theJurgen she had known was a scapegrace of twenty-one. Whereas he wasnow a staid and knowledgeable pawnbroker.

  And it seemed to Jurgen that he had never really loved any womansave Guenevere, the daughter of Gogyrvan Gawr, and the pawnbrokerwas troubled.

  "For again you make me think myself a god," says Jurgen. "MadameGuenevere, when man recognized himself to be Heaven's vicar uponearth, it was to serve and to glorify and to protect you and yourradiant sisterhood that man consecrated his existence. You werebeautiful, and you were frail; you were half goddess and halfbric-a-brac. Ohime, I recognize the call of chivalry, and myheart-strings resound: yet, for innumerable reasons, I hesitateto take you for my wife, and to concede myself your appointedprotector, responsible as such to Heaven. For one matter, I am notaltogether sure that I am Heaven's vicar here upon earth. Certainlythe God of Heaven said nothing to me about it, and I cannot butsuspect that Omniscience would have selected some more competentrepresentative."

  "It is so written, Messire Jurgen."

  Jurgen shrugged. "I too, in the intervals of business, have writtenmuch that is beautiful. Very often my verses were so beautiful thatI would have given anything in the world in exchange for somewhatless sure information as to the author's veracity. Ah, no, madame,desire and knowledge are pressing me so sorely that, between them, Idare not love you, and still I cannot help it!"

  Then Jurgen gave a little wringing gesture with his hands. His smilewas not merry; and it seemed pitiful that Guenevere should notremember him.

  "Madame and queen," says Jurgen, "once long and long ago there was aman who worshipped all women. To him they were one and all ofsacred, sweet intimidating beauty. He shaped sonorous rhymes ofthis, in praise of the mystery and sanctity of women. Then a count'stow-headed daughter whom he loved, with such love as it puzzles meto think of now, was shown to him just as she was, as not evenworthy of hatred. The goddess stood revealed, unveiled, anddisplaying in all things such mediocrity as he fretted to find inhimself. That was unfortunate. For he began to suspect that women,also, are akin to their parents; and are no wiser, and no moresubtle, and no more immaculate, than the father who begot them.Madame and queen, it is not good for any man to suspect this."

  "It is certainly not the conduct of a chivalrous person, nor of anauthentic poet," says Queen Guenevere. "And yet your eyes are bigwith tears."

  "Hah, madame," he replied, "but it amuses me to weep for a dead manwith eyes that once were his. For he was a dear lad before he wentrampaging through the world, in the pride of his youth and in thearmor of his hurt. And songs he made for the pleasure of kings, andsword play he made for the pleasure of men, and a whispering he madefor the pleasure of women, in places where renown was, and where hetrod boldly, giving pleasure to everybody in those fine days. Butfor all his laughter, he could not understand his fellows, nor couldhe love them, nor could he detect anything in aught they said or didsave their exceeding folly."

  "Why, man's folly is indeed very great, Messire Jurgen, and thedoings of this world are often inexplicable: and so does it comeabout that man can be saved by faith alone."

  "Ah, but this boy had lost his fellows' cordial common faith in theimportance of what use they made of half-hours and months and years;and because a jill-flirt had opened his eyes so that they saw toomuch, he had lost faith in the importance of his own actions, too.There was a little time of which the passing might be made notunendurable; beyond gaped unpredictable darkness; and that was allthere was of certainty anywhere. Meanwhile, he had the loan of abrain which played with ideas, and a body that went delicately downpleasant ways. And so he was never the mate for you, dear Guenevere,because he had not sufficient faith in anything at all, not even inhis own deductions."

  Now said Queen Guenevere: "Farewell to you, then, Jurgen, for it isI that am leaving you forever. I was to them that served me thelovely and excellent masterwork of God: in Caerleon and Northgalisand at Joyeuse Garde might men behold me with delight, because, mensaid, to view me was to comprehend the power and kindliness of theirCreator. Very beautiful was Iseult, and the face of Luned sparkledlike a moving gem; Morgaine and Enid and Viviane and shrewd Nimuewere lovely, too; and the comeliness of Ettarde exalted the beholderlike a proud music: these, going statelily about Arthur's hall,seemed Heaven's finest craftsmanship until the Queen came to herdais, as the moon among glowing stars: men then affirmed that God inmaking Guenevere had used both hands. And it is I that am leavingyou forever. My beauty was no human white and red, said they, but anexplicit sign of Heaven's might. In approaching me men thought ofGod, because in me, they said, His splendor was incarnate. Thatwhich I willed was neither right nor wrong: it was divine. Thisthing it was that the knights saw in me; this surety, as to thepower and kindliness of their great Father, it was of which thechevaliers of yesterday were conscious in beholding me, and of men'sneed to be worthy of such parentage; and it is I that am leaving youforever."

  Said Jurgen: "I could not see all this in you, not quite all this,because of a shadow that followed me. Now it is too late, and thisis a sorrowful thing which is happening. I am become as a rudderlessboat that goes from wave to wave: I am turned to unfertile dustwhich a whirlwind makes coherent, and presently lets fall. And so,farewell to you, Queen Guenevere, for it is a sorrowful thing and avery unfair thing that is happening."

  Thus he cried farewell to the daughter of Gogyrvan Gawr. Andinstantly she vanished like the flame of a blown out altar-candle.