Somehow, what got played was a cover version of ‘Georgy Girl’, not the original by the Seekers. It was slow and painful and awful. Not at all the sprightly version I wanted. I don’t think most people realised, but I moaned to everyone afterwards, and explained the mistake.
Two days later, Andrew Leverton himself rang – the eighth generation in the family firm – and apologised. To make amends, he said they would give a £300 donation to Marie Curie Cancer.
The funeral tea, at our house, turned into quite a jolly party, with the forty people crammed into our living room, eating and drinking and gossiping, staying most of the morning, getting noisier and noisier.
When they had all gone, it was like suddenly turning off a noisy concert on the radio, or an over-acted BBC drama. The house seemed instantly so quiet, deader and more echoing than it had ever been.
I had been alone in the house since 9 January, when Margaret went into the hospice, so I should I have become accustomed to the silence, got used to pottering around on my own. For over fifty years it had rattled with the noise of children and then grandchildren. Now I was left on my own, in an empty three-storey house. All those years we had manoeuvred and bribed to get the whole house to ourselves. And now I had it all to myself. The last thing I wanted.
I went up to Margaret’s office on the half landing at the back of the house. I looked through her glass door at her desk, where the sheets of her novel lay unfinished, her Waterman pen and ink at the ready, waiting for her return.
I knocked on the glass panel, as I always did, without thinking. It was a little ritual we had somehow got into, knocking before entering the other person’s work place. Having knocked, and realised she would not answer, never again, I then could not face opening the door, and certainly not going inside. Not yet. But I knew I would have to, sometime. Already in my mind I was forming a huge list of things to do, yet none of which I wanted to do. Not now. Not ever, really.
So, is that it? That was the title of a very good autobiography written by Bob Geldof. Some roadie had used the phrase, when they were finally packing up after the first Live Aid concert in 1985. ‘Is that it?’ And he thought he would apply it to his life story.
What am I going to do now? At the age of eighty, I didn’t have much leftover life to kill. That was the title of another good book – by Caitlin Thomas after the death of her husband Dylan.
I came downstairs and looked out at our empty wintery garden and the backyard and the gleaming York stones, not long laid, which in the end Margaret had approved of and enjoyed.
Shall I stay in the house? Should I convert the top floor, get a lodger?
What about our Lake District house? Can I really live up there in isolation in Loweswater on my own for five or six months of the year?
Can I live alone, just by myself, anywhere? I have never lived alone since we got married in 1960, nor ever felt alone since 1956 when I first went out with Margaret.
Decisions, decisions. As I walked slowly down the stairs, I could hear Margaret’s voice from her hospice bed, almost the last words she said to me.
‘You’ll be fine . . .’
LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS
1. Margaret and I got married on 11 June 1960, in Oxford. Just two other people were there – Mike Thornhill and Theo Parfit, standing behind. The wedding snaps were taken in the back garden of Theo’s family home.
2. Also in 1960 I joined the Sunday Times, eventually running the Atticus column. I gave it up in 1967 and had my photo taken with others who had written the column. Left to right: Philip Oakes, me, Robert Robinson, Godfrey Smith, Sacheverell Sitwell.
3. With the Beatles, 29 August 1967, on the train to Bangor with the Maharishi. It was the weekend that Brian Epstein died. Left to right: me, Paul, Ringo, John, the Maharishi, plus the back of George’s head.
4. Paul McCartney and his new girlfriend, Linda, came to stay with us in Portugal in December 1968. Left to right: me, our son Jake in arms, Linda, Paul, Margaret. Note her Vidal Sassoon-style haircut. Linda’s daughter, Heather, is in front and our daughter Caitlin.
5. Ace Sunday Times journalist H. Davies, left, on some exciting job in the Sixties with friend and photographer Frank Herrmann.
6. Some of the authors of the novel I created, I Knew Daisy Smuten, all on the Sunday Times in 1970, when I was women’s editor. I am kneeling. Behind me is Jilly Cooper.
7. Margaret and me at the swings on Hampstead Heath, 1968. Spot Caitlin, aged four, and Jake, aged two, in the pipe.
8. No, it’s not George Best, it’s me taking the children to school, 1970.
9. Groovy colour-mag snap with Margaret looking a bit long-suffering in our back garden, 1972.
10. Dartmouth Park United, the Sunday morning Dads’ team I helped to found, 1975. I am on front row, fourth left. My son Jake, aged ten, is standing rather squashed at the back. Two of our stars later became lords – Melvyn Bragg, back row, fourth from right, and Bernard Donoughue, back row, second on left.
11. Happy Family snaps – Caitlin, me, Margaret, Jake, 1970.
12. Wardington Cycling Club, 1974, where we had for a while a country cottage – me, Caitlin, Flora, Margaret, Jake in front.
13. Our Christmas card, 1972, taken by Frank Herrmann, with us pretending to wear Edwardian clothes. Flora, on Margaret’s lap, had just been born. Me, standing, with Jake, left, and Caitlin.
14. The children grown up, 1990, posing beautifully to please Mummy and Daddy – Jake standing, left, then me; Flora sitting, left, Margaret and Caitlin.
15. Margaret looking pensive on a broken dry stone wall at our Lakeland house, 1989.
16. Me on Hadrian’s Wall, 1974, working on a book and a TV film about walking the wall.
17. Our Lakeland house at Loweswater, which we had from 1987 to 2016. We lived and worked there half of each year.
18. We treated ourselves to the West Indies for my fiftieth birthday, in 1986. Never realised at the time that me and Margaret were wearing matching tops. Such co-ordination.
19. With two of our four granddaughters – Ruby, left, and Amelia, on a family holiday in Crete, 2006.
20. Famous people meeting me, sorry I mean the other way round. With former prime minister Tony Blair, on his election battle bus, 2001. He just happens to be holding up one of my excellent books, which I just happened to have given him.
21. With Wayne Rooney, my literary colleague, working on his autobiography, 2006.
22. The Queen, about to graciously give me an OBE, 2014.
23. Outside Buckingham Palace with Flora, Jake and Caitlin. Margaret refused to come.
24. Margaret was still alive, if only just, for my eightieth birthday party at the Groucho Club in 2016. Not that she would have gone to such a boring, showing-off event anyway . . .
25. One of the last photos of Margaret, taken in 2015 at Loweswater, in our garden with the matching rhodies.
26. Margaret’s gravestone with snowdrops, in Loweswater churchyard, taken on the first anniversary of her death, 8 February 2017.
27. Me, that same day, on our memorial seat on Hampstead Heath. We had it erected with an inscription on 11 June 1985 to mark our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary, choosing the spot carefully and amusingly – with a silver birch behind.
1. Margaret and I got married on 11 June 1960, in Oxford. Just two other people were there – Mike Thornhill and Theo Parfit, standing behind. The wedding snaps were taken in the back garden of Theo’s family home.
2. Also in 1960 I joined the Sunday Times, eventually running the Atticus column. I gave it up in 1967 and had my photo taken with others who had written the column. Left to right: Philip Oakes, me, Robert Robinson, Godfrey Smith, Sacheverell Sitwell.
3. With the Beatles, 29 August 1967, on the train to Bangor with the Maharishi. It was the weekend that Brian Epstein died. Left to right: me, Paul, Ringo, John, the Maharishi, plus the back of George’s head.
4. Paul McCartney and his new girlfriend, Linda, came to stay with us in Portug
al in December 1968. Left to right: me, our son Jake in arms, Linda, Paul, Margaret. Note her Vidal Sassoon-style haircut. Linda’s daughter, Heather, is in front and our daughter Caitlin.
5. Ace Sunday Times journalist H. Davies, left, on some exciting job in the Sixties with friend and photographer Frank Herrmann.
6. Some of the authors of the novel I created, I Knew Daisy Smuten, all on the Sunday Times in 1970, when I was women’s editor. I am kneeling. Behind me is Jilly Cooper.
7. Margaret and me at the swings on Hampstead Heath, 1968. Spot Caitlin, aged four, and Jake, aged two, in the pipe.
8. No, it’s not George Best, it’s me taking the children to school, 1970.
9. Groovy colour-mag snap with Margaret looking a bit long-suffering in our back garden, 1972.
10. Dartmouth Park United, the Sunday morning Dads’ team I helped to found, 1975. I am on front row, fourth left. My son Jake, aged ten, is standing rather squashed at the back. Two of our stars later became lords – Melvyn Bragg, back row, fourth from right, and Bernard Donoughue, back row, second on left.
11. Happy Family snaps – Caitlin, me, Margaret, Jake, 1970.
12. Wardington Cycling Club, 1974, where we had for a while a country cottage – me, Caitlin, Flora, Margaret, Jake in front.
13. Our Christmas card, 1972, taken by Frank Herrmann, with us pretending to wear Edwardian clothes. Flora, on Margaret’s lap, had just been born. Me, standing, with Jake, left, and Caitlin.
14. The children grown up, 1990, posing beautifully to please Mummy and Daddy – Jake standing, left, then me; Flora sitting, left, Margaret and Caitlin.
15. Margaret looking pensive on a broken dry stone wall at our Lakeland house, 1989.
16. Me on Hadrian’s Wall, 1974, working on a book and a TV film about walking the wall.
17. Our Lakeland house at Loweswater, which we had from 1987 to 2016. We lived and worked there half of each year.
18. We treated ourselves to the West Indies for my fiftieth birthday, in 1986. Never realised at the time that me and Margaret were wearing matching tops. Such co-ordination.
19. With two of our four granddaughters – Ruby, left, and Amelia, on a family holiday in Crete, 2006.
20. Famous people meeting me, sorry I mean the other way round. With former prime minister Tony Blair, on his election battle bus, 2001. He just happens to be holding up one of my excellent books, which I just happened to have given him.
21. With Wayne Rooney, my literary colleague, working on his autobiography, 2006.
22. The Queen, about to graciously give me an OBE, 2014.
23. Outside Buckingham Palace with Flora, Jake and Caitlin. Margaret refused to come.
24. Margaret was still alive, if only just, for my eightieth birthday party at the Groucho Club in 2016. Not that she would have gone to such a boring, showing-off event anyway . . .
25. One of the last photos of Margaret, taken in 2015 at Loweswater, in our garden with the matching rhodies.
26. Margaret’s gravestone with snowdrops, in Loweswater churchyard, taken on the first anniversary of her death, 8 February 2017.
27. Me, that same day, on our memorial seat on Hampstead Heath. We had it erected with an inscription on 11 June 1985 to mark our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary, choosing the spot carefully and amusingly – with a silver birch behind.
BIBLIOGRAPHY
By public demand – okay, because I wanted to know the total myself – here, in chronological order, is a list of all of Hunter Davies’ books, of all sorts. To qualify, they must have their own ISBN number and have Hunter’s name on the title page. They cover fiction, non-fiction, children’s books, guides, collections and edited books, but not counting reprints or revised editions.
* Subsequently appeared in new, revised editions
± Copyright given to charity
1 Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush (fiction) Heinemann, 1965
2 The Other Half: Ten Candid Looks into the Lives of Britain’s New Rich and New Poor (non-fiction, social history) Heinemann, 1966
3 The New London Spy: A Discreet Guide to the City’s Pleasures (ed., non-fiction, travel) Anthony Blond, 1966
4 *The Beatles: The authorized biography (non-fiction, biography) Heinemann, 1968
5 The Rise and Fall of Jake Sullivan (fiction) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1970
6 I Knew Daisy Smuten (ed., fiction) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1970
7 ±A Very Loving Couple (fiction) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1971
8 Body Charge (fiction) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1971
9 *The Glory Game: A Year in the Life of Tottenham Hotspur (non-fiction, sport) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1972
10 *±A Walk Along the Wall: A Journey along Hadrian’s Wall (non-fiction, travel) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1974
11 *George Stephenson: A Biographical Study of the Father of the Railways (non-fiction, biography) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1975
12 ±The Creighton Report: A Year in the Life of a Comprehensive School (non-fiction, social history) Hamish Hamilton, 1976
13 The Sunday Times Book of Jubilee Year (ed., non-fiction) Michael Joseph, 1977
14 *A Walk Around the Lakes (non-fiction, travel) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1979
15 *William Wordsworth: A Biography (non-fiction, biography) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1980
16 *Book of British Lists (non-fiction, reference) Hamlyn, 1980
17 ±Beaver Book of Lists (non-fiction, reference, children’s) Hamlyn, 1981
18 The Grades: The First Family of British Entertainment (non-fiction, biography) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1981
19 *Father’s Day: Scenes from Domestic Life (non-fiction, humour) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1981
20 *A Walk Along the Tracks: Britain’s Disused Railways (non-fiction, travel) Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1982
21 Great Britain, A Celebration (non-fiction, culture) Hamish Hamilton, 1982
22 England! 1982 World Cup Squad (non-fiction, sport) Futura, 1982
23 Flossie Teacake’s Fur Coat (fiction, children’s) Bodley Head, 1982
24 Flossie Teacake – Again! (fiction, children’s) Bodley Head, 1983
25 A Walk Round London’s Parks (non-fiction, travel) Hamish Hamilton, 1983
26 The Joy of Stamps (non-fiction) Robson Books, 1983
27 London at Its Best (non-fiction, travel) Macmillan, 1984
28 *The Good Guide to the Lakes: The First Guide to English Lakeland with Real Opinions (non-fiction, travel) Forster Davies, 1984
29 Flossie Teacake Strikes Back! (fiction, children’s) Bodley Head, 1984
31 Ossie Goes Supersonic! (fiction, children’s) Bodley Head, 1986
32 The Grand Tour (non-fiction, travel history) Hamish Hamilton, 1986
33 Ossie the Millionaire (fiction, children’s) Bodley Head, 1987
34 ±Back in the USSR (non-fiction, travel) Hamish Hamilton, 1987
35 The Good Quiz Book to the Lakes (non-fiction, reference) Forster Davies, 1987
36 The London Quiz Book (non-fiction, reference) Forster Davies, 1988
37 Lakeland Towns and Villages (ed., non-fiction, travel) Forster Davies, 1988
38 *Beatrix Potter’s Lakeland (non-fiction, biography) Warne, 1988
39 Saturday Night (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1988
40 STARS OF THE SIXTH: Fit the for the Sixth (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1989
41 STARS OF THE SIXTH: Rapping with Raffy (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1989
42 STARS OF THE SIXTH: She’s Leaving Home (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1989
43 STARS OF THE SIXTH: Party Party (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1989
44 STARS OF THE SIXTH: Ice Queen (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1989
45 STARS OF THE SIXTH: When Will I Be Famous? (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1990
46 STARS OF THE SIXTH: Who Dunnit? (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1990
47 STARS OF THE SIXTH: A Case of Sam and Ella (fictio
n, young adult) Penguin, 1990
48 STARS OF THE SIXTH: The French Connection (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1990
49 STARS OF THE SIXTH: Playing Away (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1990
50 STARS OF THE SIXTH: Let’s Stick Together (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1990
51 STARS OF THE SIXTH: Summer Daze (fiction, young adult) Penguin, 1990
52 My Life in Football (non-fiction, memoir) Mainstream, 1990
53 Snotty Bumstead (fiction, children’s) Bodley Head, 1991
54 In Search of Columbus (non-fiction, biography) Sinclair-Stevenson, 1991
55 Striker (fiction) Bloomsbury, 1992
56 Snotty Bumstead and the Rent-a-Mum (fiction, children’s) Bodley Head, 1993
57 Hunting People: Thirty Years of Interviewing the Famous (non-fiction, biography) Mainstream, 1994
58 The Teller of Tales: In Search of Robert Louis Stevenson (non-fiction, biography) Hamish Hamilton, 1994
59 *Wainwright: The Biography (non-fiction, biography) Michael Joseph, 1995
60 Living on the Lottery (non-fiction, hobbies) Little, Brown, 1996
61 ±Flossie Teacake Wins the Lottery! (fiction, children’s) Bodley Head, 1996
62 Born 1900: A Document of Our Times (non-fiction, social history) Little, Brown, 1998