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For Bob, Dexter, and Isabel
What you learn today, you can teach another the next day.
—from Ki Sayings by Kōichi Tōhei (1920–2011), founder of Ki Aikido
Chapter 1
SEAT CHANGE: HAN SIX
we draw numbers
picking slips of folded paper
from Ōshima-sensei’s box
matching them
to a map of desks
to find our han—
the group we’ll
sit with
clean with
study with
for the next
two months
I hope for at least
one friend
and by friend
I don’t mean
what I used to mean by friend
before I moved to Japan
before I started here
at this school once called
Dragon’s Mouth
by friend I just mean
anyone who doesn’t
punch me
for using the wrong word
kick me
for having an accent
or call me
stinking foreigner
but this time
I get no friends
I get
Shunta
Gō
Yuki
Naho
and Mika
Shunta being the one
who hurled a chair
out the classroom
balcony door
Gō being the one
who hit my friend Yōhei
above his left eye
requiring stitches
Naho and Yuki
being the girls
all the other girls
are afraid of
and Mika being the one
who cuts everyone down
with her sword-sharp
words
as we push desks
into position
Mika points
to her seat
beside mine
checks the map
says no way!
next to the stinking foreigner?
and they all laugh
she keeps a gap
between her desk
and mine
across from me
Gō slides his desk back
to do the same
kids from all
the other han
point
murmur
stare
I expect Ōshima-sensei to help—
separate my han members
divide them up
spread them out
save me
but he frowns
says
I expect no trouble
from han six
he seems to think
I can fend for myself
since I’m a year older
having repeated a grade
when we moved to Japan
but being a year older
in grade six
in this school
in this out-of-the-way
seaside neighborhood
where hardly anyone
isn’t Japanese
makes me even more different
than I already am
even more the nail
that sticks out
just waiting
to be hammered down
in two periods of science
with Takata-sensei in the lab—
I have ninety minutes to think
on how to survive
nearly two whole months
in han six
Yōhei, Shō, Ken, and I
take plant specimens to our station
slice across stems, set them in water
for observing changes day by day
I laugh with Yōhei like he expects me to
write observations like I’m supposed to do
draw diagrams like we’re told to
watching Shunta and Gō
across the room
waving cutter knives
making nicks in the desktop
and dicing an eraser
into smaller
and smaller
pieces
lunch is in the classroom
back with han six
eating chicken stuff on rice
salad with cucumbers
and a mikan orange
trying to chew
and swallow
surrounded by
Shunta
Gō
Yuki
Naho
and Mika
Naho eats her mikan fast
and wants another
so I give her mine
thinking
maybe I can change her mind
about foreigners
Naho stares at my mikan
sitting on her tray
I don’t like fruit I explain
but she says iyada!—no way!
won’t take it
won’t touch it
tells Mika to remove it
from her tray
which Mika does
with thumb and finger
then throws it to Shunta
who puts it in his pocket
and says he’ll
feed it to his dog
I don’t finish my rice
can’t finish my rice
knowing my day
will only get worse
because after lunch is
cleaning
upstairs in the music room
no teacher
just me with
Shunta
Gō
Yuki
Naho
and Mika
Chapter 2
CLEANING
we’re supposed to
move desks aside
sweep the floor clean
then put the desks back
I take a broom
to get started
but Shunta yanks it
right from my hands
he shoves me
and forces me
and only me
to use the dustpan
here, boy, here they say
Shunta, Gō
Yuki, Naho, and Mika
again and again
making me
and only me
sweep up
tiny piles of dust
I sweep fast with
one quick flick
of the dust broom
while watching my back
when they quit
and sit on desks
I quit and sit on a desk
but they yell
Jason! Move it!
to make me sweep up more
I glare at them
and don’t move
until Gō approaches
then I hop off, start putting
desks back into position
like we’re supposed to
always careful
to keep
a desk
or chair
between me
and Gō
later, walking home
Yōhei, Shō, and Ken
try to encourage me
share strategies
tell me not to
meet their eyes
listen to insults
act scared
tell me to
laugh at their jokes
keep out of their way
and never fight back
I can’t I say
you have to they argue
it’s the only way
but I’ve watched Gō and Shunta
and I know they’re just waiting
to push me too far
at home I kick off my shoes
drop my backpack
head up to my room, planning
to lie down on my top bunk
but in my our room
my sister Cora’s playing teacher
with her second-grade friend
their stuffed animals
lined up in rows
all over the tatami
so I can barely
walk in the door
I holler at her
step on a squirrel
and slam the door
in the living room
I flop down on the couch
my face smooshed
against cushions
and lie there immobile
till Mom shouts from the kitchen
where she’s grading papers
that it’s time to do homework
and put on my aikido gi
and, by the way …
she needs to talk to me
about taking care of Cora
on Wednesdays
since she’s been offered
two more classes to teach
iyada—no way!
I yell into the cushion
nasty
just like Naho said it to me
but suddenly Mom’s hands
are hauling me up by one arm
Jason Parker she says
we don’t talk like that in this house
so go clean up the genkan
then start your homework
I move the stupid shoes
out of the way
and sweep the stupid genkan
then line up the shoes
with toes facing out
all proper
in case some neighbor
stops by
except
I pair the shoes
right shoe on left
and left shoe on right
hah!
Chapter 3
CENTERING
it’s dusk when I leave for the dojo
switch on my bicycle light
and coast downhill toward the temple
where I cross the main road
cut into an alley, cross the bridge
and ride the lane that follows the river
there you can hear the slap
and splash of fish jumping
so I sometimes stop and wait
straining to see fish in the dark
but today I’m late and pedal past
to the house that’s really a dojo
I started aikido
after moving here
in third grade
after I learned
that soccer here
is all afternoon
every Saturday
every month
all year long
with kids like Shunta and Gō
and a coach who did charades
to explain things to me
then tried simple English
and laughed hilariously
like it’s the funniest thing in the world
to speak English
the dojo is different
at the dojo
you start with a white belt
no matter who you are
girl or boy
you do the moves
with everyone else
no matter your age
or size or rank
you take tests
to advance levels
no matter your age
or size or rank
you get respect
you give respect
no matter your age
or size or rank
I was white
then green
then yellow belt
now I’m orange
trying for blue
at the dojo
you bow to enter
and on the mats
you kneel, you meditate
you hold your one-point center
even when Yamada-sensei
pushes your forehead to test you
you chant, you stretch
you roll
across
the mats
forward
and back
you bow to your opponent
you practice holds and moves
you take your opponent’s energy
and turn it to overcome him
or her
and what matters most
through every move and fall
is you keep firm
you stay in control
you hold your center
in aikido
we practice protecting
we imagine attackers
we use mind and body together
our ki energy
to keep calm
perform our best
so we can dare to face
an enemy of millions
but today I picture real attackers
so while entering and turning
and receiving strikes
I’m thinking of
Shunta
Gō
Yuki
Naho
and Mika
I focus hard
make no mistakes
calm and action
as one
Chapter 4
ENGLISH GROUP
being away
from the Dragon’s Mouth
and han six
for a total of
sixty-five weekend hours
makes Monday morning
back at school
the worst—
Mika stabbing me with her words
Gō slamming me every time I stand
Yuki hitting the back of my head
whenever I make a mistake and
Shunta and Naho egging them on
all day long Ōshima-sensei
seems blind to my situation
just yelling about noise
way too much noise
so at the final bell I race
from classroom to school gate
to our car waiting uphill
for Cora and me
I feel like telling Mom
step on it
like we’re in
a getaway car
even though
we’re just driving
the usual route
to English group
English group
is kids like us—
transplants
or hāfu mixes
or Japanese returnees
who lived abroad
a long time
a whole group
of English speakers
from different Japanese schools
who meet once a week
in a public hall in Yokohama
to keep up our English—
not just speaking, but also
reading
writing
thinking
researching
presenting
we’re divided i
nto olders and youngers and in the olders we’re
Will—mom English, dad Japanese
Nenita—mom Filipino, dad Japanese
Erika—mom Japanese, dad Japanese-American
Trina—mom Chinese-Singaporean, dad Japanese
Ami—mom Japanese, dad Ghanaian-Canadian
me, Jason or “J”—mom Polish/Italian-American dad Dutch/English-American
today Trina’s mom is teaching
the olders and youngers together
a new unit on economics
and we’re learning about scarcity
which we get when she tricks us
into thinking there are many bags
of popcorn on the table—help yourselves!
but the popcorn runs out
when only a few have had any
because it turns out most bags
contain only crumpled paper
so Ami’s sister starts bawling
then Trina’s mom asks us how
to solve the problem of limited supply
we suggest sharing the popcorn
but the youngers Ethan and Sophie
already opened their bags and ate half
which leads to a lesson on allocation
and resources and choice and then
we break into olders and youngers
for discussions and exercises
we have to come up with
examples of things
in limited supply
and think of a way
to allocate that good
or resource
Will, Nenita, Trina
Ami, and I list
water
time
manga in English
money for fun stuff
unicycles at school
electricity
then we crack up
when Erika who loves fashion
and spends her allowance
on shoes says shoe closets!
we laugh and joke
and no one
whacks anyone
on the head
Chapter 5
FIRE
on Wednesday
the first Wednesday
for watching my sister Cora
the wind blows wild—
leaves scrape the street
shutters bang
and a Styrofoam box trips past
like it’s out for a walk
bōken—an adventure
Cora says for the fifth time
as she unlocks her bike
I nod like I have a plan
but I don’t
the wind blows so hard
the air tastes of salt
the temple bell rings too loud
and the streetcar horn blasts too close
like the train has left the seaside tracks
to climb right up to our neighborhood
high on the hill
I don’t think you have an adventure planned