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    Don't Poke a Worm till it Wriggles


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      For Charlotte

      in memory of many charming worms

      Contents

      Book Worms

      Don’t Poke a Worm

      Hey Wiggle Wiggle

      Sing a Song of Squiggling

      What is a Worm?

      Tweet Tweet, Blackbird

      If I Could Choose

      Wonderful Worms

      Wormy, Wormy, Oh So Squirmy

      Through a Window

      Ark Anglers

      Reliable, Pliable Worms

      The Worm that Turned

      Weeny Worm Wuffet

      One Famous Worm

      Another Famous Worm

      Late Worm

      Small Robin Horner

      If Worms Were Wishes

      News Item

      Flexi-Worms

      Vermicular Olympics

      Elf and Safety

      A Wriggly Dip

      Everyday Worms

      Racing Worms

      A Nonsense Worm

      Why Wrinkle Your Nose?

      Charming Worms

      Wiggle, Worm, Wiggle

      Mixed Worms

      Cat’s Trophy

      A Close Call

      The Worm who was Afraid of the Light

      Squirmy Wormingham

      The Wise Old Worm

      A Prickly Task

      Mary Had a Wiggly Worm

      More Charming Worms

      Mr Mole

      Incey Wincey Wormy

      Simple Squirmy

      Hickory Dickory Dee

      Wormy Warnings

      More Wormy Warnings

      Weather Worms

      Worms on Ice

      Worms in Winter

      Dreams in a Drought

      Two Little Worms

      The Ghost Worm

      Wee Willie Wormy

      A Worm’s Prayer

      Rock-a-bye Wormy

      Book Worms

      If this book wriggles

      and squiggles and squirms,

      that is because it’s a

      book full of worms.

      Curl up like a worm

      and enjoy all the rhymes,

      a hundred, a thousand,

      a million times.

      Don’t Poke a Worm

      Don’t poke a worm till it wriggles.

      Just joke with a worm till it jiggles

      and breaks into chuckles,

      goes bendy and buckles

      and giggles and giggles and giggles.

      Hey Wiggle Wiggle

      Hey wiggle wiggle

      The worm had a wriggle,

      He squirmed right over the mole.

      The little mole gaped

      To see he’d escaped

      And the worm wriggled into his hole.

      Sing a Song of Squiggling

      Sing a song of squiggling,

      A garden full of worms,

      Four and twenty sneezes

      Cover them in germs.

      When I dig the flower-bed

      The worms begin to squirm,

      Why am I allergic to

      The humble garden worm?

      What is a Worm?

      A string with a wiggle

      A rope with no knot

      A ribbon with nothing to tie

      A finger-sized soil-bag

      A root with no pot

      The gleam in a blackbird’s eye

      Tweet Tweet, Blackbird

      Tweet tweet, blackbird,

      Have you any worms?

      Yes, sir, yes, sir,

      My beak squirms:

      One for the robin,

      One for the thrush,

      And one for the nightingale

      That sings in the bush.

      If I Could Choose

      If I could choose what I might be

      I’d like to be a worm.

      And no-one would say ‘sit still’ to me

      If I could choose what I might be.

      I can’t sit still, you must agree:

      I wriggle and I squirm.

      If I could choose what I might be

      I’d like to be a worm.

      Wonderful Worms

      Anna Worm is acrobatic,

      Bertie Worm is brave,

      Charlie Worm is cheerful,

      a daring worm is Dave.

      Elspeth Worm is elegant,

      Freddie Worm has fangs,

      Gertie Worm is simply great,

      Harvey Worm just hangs.

      Ivy Worm’s inspiring,

      Jasmine Worm, she jives,

      Katy Worm is kindly,

      Lucy Worm saves lives.

      Mary Worm’s magnificent,

      Nasreen Worm is neat,

      Oliver Worm is odd at times,

      a popular worm is Pete.

      Quentin Worm is quiet and quick,

      Richard Worm is wriggly,

      Sanjit Worm’s surprising,

      Tamsin Worm is tickly.

      Ulrica Worm is upside down,

      Vikram Worm is vexed,

      William Worm is witty and wise,

      a secretive worm is X.

      Yolanda Worm likes yellow sand,

      Zoe Worm has zest.

      Ask any worm, “Are you wonderful?”

      and all worms answer, “YES!”

      Wormy, Wormy, Oh So Squirmy

      Wormy, Wormy,

      Oh so squirmy,

      How do your segments coil?

      Through eating clay

      And sand each day

      And forty sorts of soil.

      Through a Window

      One day a worm looked through a little window

      and saw a starfish, far from sea or sand,

      But the window was the glass of a jam jar,

      and the starfish was a small boy’s hand.

      Ark Anglers

      Noah let his sons go fishing,

      only on the strictest terms:

      “Sit still, keep quiet and concentrate:

      we’ve only got two worms!”

      Reliable, Pliable Worms

      Worms are dependable

      stretchy and bendable

      always extendable

      never expendable

      garden befriendable

      completely commendable:

      Give that worm a medal!

      The Worm that Turned

      O

      here is

      the

      worm

      that

      turned

      but

      not

      the other cheek,

      this

      worm

      wrapped

      himself

      around

      the

      early bird’s

      fat

      beak.

      Weeny Worm Wuffet

      Weeny Worm Wuffet,

      Squirmed on a tuffet,

      Eating her soil and clay.

      A hedgehog appeared

      With a prickly beard

      And frightened Worm Wuffet away.

      One Famous Worm

      My name is so famous that, maybe, you know it:

      I’m William Wormsworth, a classical poet.

      Another Famous Worm

      Leonardo da Vormi, an Italian wormy,

      could writhe his name backwards, the teaser!

      One of the cleverest worms on earth,

      he painted the Squirma Lisa.

      Late Worm

      When my worm snuffed it

      somebody stuffed it:

      Taxidermy

      can be wormy.

      Small Robin Horner

      Small Robin Horner

      Sat in a corner

      Eating his fresh worm-pie.

      He stuck in his beak

      And flew into next week

      When a worm whipped him right in the eye
    .

      If Worms Were Wishes

      If worms were wishes

      I’d dig every day

      and fill up a bucket

      of worms on the way.

      I’d pick up each one

      and, worm after worm,

      I’d make lots of wishes

      to make people squirm:

      For Tommy (who pushed me

      and trod on my toes)

      I’d wish he had worms

      hanging out of his nose.

      For Polly (who stuck out

      her tongue at me earlier)

      I’d wish her tongue longer,

      and thinner and curlier.

      But for Mum (who has loved me

      since the day I was born)

      I’d wish extra worms

      in her lovely green lawn.

      News Item

      “The scientists know everything about me,”

      said the worm, as it wove down one more hole,

      And its five tiny hearts beat faster,

      “But they still don’t know about my soul.”

      Flexi-Worms

      Twenty soily centimetres underneath the ground

      flexi-worms are exercising, writhing round and round,

      strengthening their muscles in gymnastic pursuits

      as they wiggle-weave and zig-zag in between the roots.

      Tiptoe on the grass, now – don’t make a sound;

      mustn’t wake the worms up deep underground:

      worn out with work-outs, they’re curling up to sleep

      thirty dirty centimetres underneath our feet.

      Sssshhhhh!

      Vermicular* Olympics

      Ploughed field events:

      Long stretch

      High stretch

      100-segment wriggle

      Squiggle, wiggle and curl

      Pebble-put

      Puddle events:

      Back squirm

      Saddle squirm

      Caterpillar squirm

      (*of worms)

      Elf and Safety

      If you’re a worm never visit the home

      of a fairy, a pixie, an elf or a gnome.

      They’ll ask you to stay, in fact, they’ll insist.

      And how will they use you? Consider this list:

      As …

      a beetle’s lead – for walkies,

      a skipping-worm – for play,

      a worm to tie their hair up

      if it’s getting in the way,

      a guard-worm, in holly leaves,

      or, laid out on the floor,

      a living draught-excluder

      shoved up against their door,

      a worm that’s slung between two sticks

      for washing to hang on – a worm in a fix!

      Tied to a flower, a vertical worm,

      for fairyfolk to climb –

      so, worms, be wary of elf and fairy;

      they’ll give you a very hard time!

      A Wriggly Dip

      Dip, dip, earthworm, in the sand,

      Who’d like to hold you in their hand?

      Wriggle little earthworm,

      Wriggle-me-ree,

      Will it be the next one?

      No,

      not

      he!

      Dip, dip, earthworm, in the sand,

      Who’d like to hold you in their hand?

      Wriggle little earthworm,

      Wriggle-me-ree,

      Will it be the next one?

      Yes,

      it’s

      she!

      Everyday Worms

      rough

      worms

      tough worms

      soft and

      sentimental worms

      funny

      worms

      sunny worms

      cool, calm and

      gentle

      worms

      worms in the garden

      worms in

      the park

      worms in

      the daytime

      worms

      after

      dark

      squiggling

      wriggling

      every

      little squirm

      just as

      individual

      as

      every

      tiny

      worm

      Racing Worms

      Humble Worm and Slightly Soiled begin a squirmy race.

      They’re heading for the compost heap for each to fill their face.

      “Last one there’s a centipede!” cries Humble, with a grin.

      “I’m the fastest worm there is,” says Slightly Soiled. “I’ll win!”

      Humble Worm gets tangled in a labyrinth of roots.

      Slightly Soiled surfaces and off the young worm shoots.

      Yet wormly pride, the saying goes, comes before a rise:

      A blackbird grabs poor Slightly Soiled and lifts him to the skies.

      But Slightly Soiled knows stories of what fortune flattery brings;

      He keeps his cool and tells the bird how beautifully he sings.

      “Of course, I do sing wonderfully!” the foolish blackbird calls:

      The plan succeeds – an open beak means Slightly Soiled falls.

      This time he wriggles underleaf, quite safe, but not too deep,

      And in no time at all he’s reached the garden compost heap.

      A second later, who arrives, but Humble Worm: “I reckoned

      I could beat you, Slightly Soiled, but now I see I’m second.”

      The worms shake tails and wriggle in the compost for a feed.

      “The race was close,” says Slightly Soiled, “and I must concede

      That you squirmed pretty quickly for – ahem – a centipede!”

      A Nonsense Worm

      How many worms in a wriggle?

      How many wriggles in a squirm?

      How many squirms in a flower-bed

      if you’ve only got one worm?

      Why Wrinkle Your Nose?

      Why wrinkle your nose at poor worms?

      They’re good creatures, not horrible germs!

      They’re the gardener’s friend,

      Turning soil. In the end

      Plants grow better because of their squirms.

      Charming Worms

      I don’t mean worms are charming

      though, of course, they’re rather sweet

      and if you’re a mole or a hedgehog

      then you’ll find them good to eat –

      no – to ‘charm’ worms is to tempt them

      to come up – let me explain:

      you encourage them to surface

      when you make them think you’re rain.

      The poor worms quickly panic

      when they feel their ceilings shake,

      so they’re up and in the sun before

      they realise their mistake:

      No rain to flood their tunnels!

      No worms about to drown!

      Just a human with a bucket

      who is stamping up and down!

      Wiggle, Worm, Wiggle

      Worm wiggled under the weeds:

      Wiggle, Worm, wiggle.

      Worm wiggled back again.

      Well wiggled, Worm.

      Mixed Worms

      The garden worm is homely,

      he likes bedsock, book and tea.

      The field worm is much bolder,

      she plays wormball; learns to ski.

      The mountain worm’s a cool one –

      an amazing head for heights!

      Woolly sheep and bracken

      are among his chief delights.

      The seaside worm builds castles

      on every sandy shore,

      with heaps of curly corridors

      but never once a door.

      The riverbank worm’s bravest,

      she’s never heard of spud

      or carrot, swede or turnip,

      all she’s ever known is mud.

      Worms are all so different

      and yet so much the same!

      Let’s all applaud the gentle worm,

      salute
    its squirmy name.

      Cat’s Trophy

      When cats go out hunting

      they’ll bring in the house

      a frog or a blackbird,

      a shrew or a mouse.

      When my cat was a kitten

      he started out small

      and caught a live earthworm

      to brighten our hall.

      A Close Call

      When Hedgehog saw two worms in love

      her appetite diminished.

      The worms were tangled in a hug

      and, when their cuddle finished,

      the hedgehog said, “Keep calm, young worms,”

      (the worms were looking frantic),

      “I cannot eat two worms in love.

      I’m just an old romantic.”

      So if you spot two tangled worms,

      locked in a strong embrace,

      the chances are you’ll also see

      a hedgehog’s gentle face.

      The Worm who was Afraid of the Light

      “I don’t like it out here on the surface,”

      Said a worm to her mother one day.

      “It’s far too bright. I’m afraid of the light.

      Can I please burrow home now and play?”

      “Oh, dear! Oh, dear!” said her mother.

      “I don’t like little worms that wail.

      It’s a shame that you haven’t a house on your back;

      You should have been born a snail.”

      But that gave the worm an idea:

      She dressed up in a snail’s old shell.

      “Look, Mum,” called her echoey voice,

      “I’m a snail. (But I don’t like the smell.)”

      Now if you find a shell, listen carefully.

      If you hear a small voice saying, “Pooh!”

      Then you’ll know that there’s no snail inside it;

      It is occupied by You Know Who!

      Squirmy Wormingham

      Squirmy Wormingham

      Squirmed to Birmingham

      In a shower of rain.

      He went for a paddle

     


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