Meryam went alone that night to investigate. With Tulathan shining high overhead, Meryam stared at the surface of the pool. It reflected the stars, mirror-like, and when she touched its surface, she found it to be solid, unmoving, and strangely warm . . . and within its depths was no ehrekh, but Goezhen himself, god of chaos, misery, and all creatures dark and foul. His chest had been pierced. Dark blood spread outward from the wide, open wound, as unmoving as Goezhen himself.
Meryam walked out onto the surface of the pool where she crouched and stared down into Goezhen’s pained eyes. “A god trapped like a fly in amber.” She half expected Goezhen to wake, for him to free himself from his prison and tear her limb from limb. When he didn’t, she wondered aloud, “What happened?”
His boldness became too great, spoke a voice inside her head.
She knew immediately who it was, yet still she shivered when she turned and saw Tulathan in all her glory standing on the pool’s lush, green verge. As she’d been on their first meeting in the Sun Palace, she was naked, her skin and her hair glowing softly silver. There was a different look in her eye, though. The last time she’d seemed almost amused by their encounter. Now she seemed intense, a fury burning inside her, perhaps because her brother god had been slain.
“It was Nalamae who slew him, was it not?” Meryam asked.
Tulathan nodded, then stepped onto the pool’s surface. The scent that came with her was like autumn’s first chill. Thou bearest anger towards me.
“I do not,” Meryam lied.
Tulathan smiled and gestured to the desert around her. I have heard it on the wind, heard thee fouling my name.
Meryam paused. It wouldn’t do to lie again to the goddess. “I was promised the thirteenth tribe.”
The promise made was to grant thee the power to destroy them, and it was.
“No. In the end, it was Rümayesh who gave me what I needed.”
Tulathan laughed, a sound like distant wind chimes. And who dost thou think delivered her to thy doorstep?
Meryam paused, thinking over all that had happened, how close she’d been.
Thy road is not ended, Meryam shan Aldouan. There are choices yet to be made.
“My road is ended.”
Because thy power was taken from thee?
“Yes! My throne is gone. My magic burned from me. What’s left?”
Whilst thou still draws breath, there is time to reach the end. There are wonders still hidden in the desert that one might use. One has but to find them.
“What power could give me what I want?”
Tulathan ambled around Meryam, slowly circling her. In all thy searching, didst thou find no mentions of such? A creator abandoned as thou hast been abandoned? A soul lost as thou art lost?
Meryam thought back. She’d read hundreds of accounts of strange artifacts and creatures of the desert. But none were powerful enough to alter the winds of fate, and even if they were, she had no idea where to find them.
Lost as thou art lost, Tulathan had said. An abandoned soul. What could she be referring to?
But then she stared down, and went perfectly still. Tulathan had used another word. Creator. Who was it that had created the desert gods? The elders. The elder gods had made them.
Seven by seven they came from the heavens. So the legend went. But there were whispers in the old texts of another, one who’d been cast down and left behind, just as the young gods had been left behind. In all that she had read, a lone name had been written in a single text. Ashael. He’d been struck down by Iri and abandoned as too dangerous, too malignant, to bring to a bright new world.
Tulathan’s smile showed perfect teeth. Very good.
Spit formed in Meryam’s mouth. It was all she could do to clear it. Those two simple words were as close to an acknowledgment as she was going to get.
Tulathan came to a stop and crouched, staring at Meryam like a child examining her first dragonfly. Though I wonder if thou possess the will.
“I do,” Meryam said, feeling her old fount of anger and ambition returning. “I do.”
Tulathan’s silver eyes dropped to Meryam’s neck. If what thou sayest is true, thou must look ahead. Thou must leave thy past behind.
Meryam reached up and touched the necklace that rested there. Yasmine’s necklace. “Leave it behind?”
And admit the truth. Admit thy heart’s desire.
Tulathan seemed to be waiting for something. Meryam was almost certain what it was, but she couldn’t take that step. She needed Yasmine’s memory now more than ever. The goddess seemed to sense her doubts. Her smile faded, and she stood and walked away. She’d reached the verge when Meryam cried, “Stop!” When Tulathan turned around, Meryam took off the necklace. “I can do it. I can leave the past behind.”
And the rest?
Admit the truth. Admit her heart’s desire. She felt Yasmine’s cold, judgmental stare. Stop using me as your excuse, she’d said. Let me rest.
Staring into Tulathan’s eyes, Meryam swallowed and nodded. “I did it for myself,” she said. “Everything. It was for me all along. I wanted the power for myself. I want it still.”
Tulathan’s smile returned. If thou speakest from thy heart, thou hast but to offer a token in sacrifice. Her eyes drifted down to where Goezhen lay trapped. The rest will follow.
With that she turned and strode away, leaving Meryam feeling more vulnerable than she’d felt in a long while. She might not understand all that lay ahead, but she knew what Tulathan meant her to do.
She stared down at the necklace, gave it one last kiss. “Goodbye, Yasmine.” Then tossed it onto the pool’s unyielding surface.
There was a sound like breaking glass followed by a stomach-lurching sensation, and Meryam plunged into warm, fetid water. She coughed and spluttered and saw the necklace sink, growing dimmer and dimmer until it was lost to the pool altogether. Goezhen’s yellow eyes, meanwhile, stared up at her.
She swam to the edge of the pool and stood where Tulathan had just been. The body of a god. Tulathan had just given her the body of a god. It was far from everything she would need, but it was a start. The rest lay in Sharakhai, in the countless tomes filled with knowledge. Between those two things she would have all she wanted, all the power she would ever need.
Walking away, Meryam smiled for the first time in a long while. They had thought to take the desert from her, but they didn’t realize: the desert was hers now. Hers. And nothing was going to stop her from taking it back.
Appendix
aba: a loose, sleeveless outer garment woven of camel’s or goat’s hair
aban: a board game
abaya: long-sleeved robe worn by women, often with a headscarf or veil
açal: rattlewings, poisonous beetles
adichara: thorned trees that only spread their flowers in moonlight; their petals grant heightened awareness and strength
Adzin: a soothsayer, a “mouse of a man”
agal: circlet of black cord used to keep a ghutrah in place
akhala: rare breed of very large horse, “widely considered the finest in the desert”; “giants of the desert”
Al’afwa Khadar: a/k/a the Moonless Host; men and women from Sharakhai or the desert wastes, sworn to fight the Kings
Alamante: Ramahd’s second after Dana’il
Al’Ambra: old set of laws the desert tribes had used for thousands of years; precedes the Kannan
alangual: half of a whole (couple), meant to “hold hands in the farther fields”
Alansal: Queen of Mirea
alchemyst: one who works in the ways of chemicals, agents, and reagents to produce magical elixirs
Aldouan shan Kalamir: king of Qaimir, Ramahd’s father-in-law
Alize: one of Okan’s rid
ers in the Traverse
Almadan: capital city of Qaimir
Altan: a collegia student collecting the names of the thirteenth tribe, sent to his death by the blood magi, Nebahat
Amal: Çeda’s best dirt dog student
Amalos: a master of the collegium
the Amber City, Amber Jewel: where Çeda lives, a/k/a Sharakhai
amberlark: a pretty bird with a lonesome call
amphora/amphorae: narrow-necked bottle/bottles
Anila: a necromancer who gained her powers when Davud used her as the source of a spell that went out of control
Annam’s Crook: a peak in the Shangazi
Annam’s Traverse: legendary horse race, held once every three years
araba: a horse-drawn carriage
araq: an intoxicating beverage with a strong smoky flavor
Aríz: shaikh of Tribe Kadri, cousin of Mihir
Armesh: husband of Şelal Ymine’ala al Rafik; “the man who’d done the most to shelter Leorah and Devorah after their parents had been killed”
ashwagandha: a healing herb
Ashwandi: beautiful, dark-skinned woman, sister of Kesaea
asir: individual asirim
the asirim: the cursed, undying warriors of the Kings of Sharakhai, members of the thirteenth tribe
Athel: carpetmonger, father of Havasham
Austral Sea: a large sea to the south of Qaimir
Avam: a cook with a food stall near the spice market
Bagra: physic of Tribe Rafik
Bakhi: god of harvest and death
Bahri Al’sir: a legendary adventurer, musician, and poet; a common figure in mythic tales of the desert
ballista/ballistae: a large crossbow for firing a spear
Behlosh: a male ehrekh, one of the first made by Goezhen
Beht Ihman: the night the Kings saved Sharakhai from the gathered tribes
Beht Revahl: the night the Kings defeated the last of the wandering tribes
Beht Tahlell: the holy day to commemorate when Nalamae created the River Haddah
Beht Zha’ir: the night of the asirim, a holy night that comes every six weeks. “The night the twin moons, Tulathan and her sister, Rhia, rose together and lit the desert floor.”
Benan: son of Shaikh Şelal
Bent Man Bridge: the oldest and bulkiest of Sharakhai’s bridges; crosses the dry remains of the River Haddah
Beyaz: a former King of Qaimir
Biting Shields: a nickname for the people of Tribe Rafik
Black Lion of Kundhun: Djaga Akoyo
black lotus: an addictive & debilitating narcotic
the Black Veils: of Tribe Salmük
the Black Wings: of Tribe Okan
Blackfire Gate: one of the largest gates into the old city; also the name of one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in the city
Blackthorn: Lord Blackthorn: pseudonym for Rümayesh as an opponent of Çeda’s in the pit
Blade Maidens: the Kings’ personal bodyguards
blazing blues: migratory birds that travel in great flocks, considered good luck
Blood of the Desert: bright red mites no larger than a speck of dust
Bloody Manes: a nickname for the people of Tribe Narazid
Bloody Passage: a massacre in the desert in which Ramahd Amansir’s wife and child were killed
the Blue Heron: Ramahd’s family yacht
bone crushers: the large, rangy hyenas of the desert
Brama Junayd’ava: a thief, Osman’s “second story man”
breathstone: one of the three types of diaphanous stones; it needs blood. When forced down the throat of the dead, they are brought back to life for a short time.
Brushing Wing: name of Kameyl’s sword
Burhan: a caravan master
the Burning Hands: a nickname for the people of Tribe Kadri
burnoose: a hooded mantle or cloak
burqa: loose garment covering the entire body, with a veiled opening for the eyes
caravanserai: a small village or trading post built on caravan routes; provides food, water, and rest for ships and their crews
caravel: sailing ship
Cassandra: a collegia student collecting the names of the thirteenth tribe in various records
Çeda (full name: Çedamihn Ahyanesh’ala): daughter of Ahyanesh, a fighter in the pits of Sharakhai, a member of the thirteenth tribe
Coffer Street: See: The Wheel
Corum: one of Ramahd’s men
cressetwing: beautiful moth; also known as irindai (See also, gallows moth)
Dana’il: first mate of Ramahd’s Blue Heron
Dardzada: Çeda’s foster father, an apothecary
Darius: one of the Moonless Host
dasheen: edible roots
Davud Mahzun’ava: one of Tehla’s (the baker’s) brothers
Dayan: shaikh of Tribe Halarijan
Derya Redknife: female rider for Tribe Rafik; “thrice Devorah’s age but also thrice the rider”
Desert’s Amber Jewel: a common name for Sharakhai
Devahndi: the fourth day of the week in the desert calendar
Devorah: Leorah’s sister
dhow: sailing vessel, generally lateen-rigged on two or three masts
Dilara: a blood mage and member of the Enclave, sister to Esmeray
dirt dog: someone who fights in the pits
Djaga Akoyo: Çeda’s mentor in the pits; known as the Lion of Kundhun
doudouk: musical instrument
Duke Hektor I: the brother of King Aldouan, slain by Queen Meryam for treason
Duke Hektor II: the son of Duke Hektor I and the rightful king of Qaimir
Duyal: the shaikh of Tribe Okan
Ebros: one of the tribes; a/k/a the Standing Stones
Ehmel: was to have competed in Annam’s Traverse but broke his leg
ehrekh: bestial creations of the god Goezhen
Emir: the king of Malasan, son of Surrahdi the Mad King
Emre Aykan’ava: Çeda’s roommate, her closest friend since childhood
Enasia: see: Lady Enasia
Esmeray: a blood mage who lost her ability to use magic when the Enclave’s inner circle burned it from her
Esrin: a blood mage and member of the Enclave, brother to Esmeray
falchion: short medieval sword
fekkas: a hard biscuit, can be sweet or savory
fetters: a length of tough, braided leather wrapped tightly around one of each fighter’s wrists, keeping them in close proximity
the Five Kingdoms: a name used to indicate Sharakhai and the four kingdoms that surround the desert
The Flame of Iri: a/k/a the Sunset Stone; a giant amethyst
Floret Row: Where Dardzada’s apothecary shop is
the Four Arrows: one of the oldest and most famous inns along the Trough
Frail Lemi: a giant of a man; suffered a bad head injury when he was young; is sometimes aggressive, sometimes childlike
Galadan: stone mason Emre sometimes works for
galangal: aromatic, medicinal rhizome of the ginger plant
gallows moth: beautiful moth; sign of imminent death but also, to those who know it as cressetwing or irindai, it is considered a sign of luck
Ganahil: capital city of Kundhun
Gelasira: Savior of Ishmantep; former wearer of Çeda’s sword
ghee: clarified liquid butter
Ghiza: elderly neighbor of Çeda & Emre
ghutrah: a veil-like headpiece worn by men; an agal keeps it in place
Goezhen the Wicked: god of chaos and vengeance, creator of the ehrekh and other dark creatures of the desert
golden chalice of Bahri Al’sir: from Tribe Narazid to the winner of Annam’s
Traverse
Goldenhill: an affluent district of Sharakhai
Gravemaker: the name of King Külaşan’s morning star
greaves: plate armor for the leg, set between the knee and the ankle
Guhldrathen: name of the ehrekh Meryam consults
Haddad: a caravan owner from Malasan
Haddah: the river that runs through Sharakhai, dry for most of the year
Hajesh: Melis’s oldest sister
hajib: term of respect (not to be confused with hijab)
Halarijan: the tribe of Sim and Verda; a/k/a the White Trees
Halim: Lord of the Burning Hands (of Tribe Kadri); the tribe’s shaikh
Hall of Swords: where the Blade Maidens learn and train
Hallowsgate: one of the twelve towers spaced along the city’s outer wall; is “due west of Tauriyat and the House of Kings, at the terminus of the street known as the Spear”
Halond: a craftsman, wanders the desert looking for lightning strikes
Haluk Emet’ava: a captain of the Silver Spears, “a tower of a man” a/k/a “the Oak of the Guard”
Hamid Malahin’ava: one of Macide’s men and a childhood friend of Çeda & Emre
Hamzakiir: son of Külaşan, the Wandering King
a hand: a unit of five Blade Maidens
hangman’s vine: a distillation that can make one lose one’s memories
Hasenn: a Blade Maiden
Hathahn: Djaga’s final opponent in the fighting pits before she retired
hauberk: chainmail tunic
Havasham: handsome son of Athel the carpetmonger
Hazghad Road: See: The Wheel
Hefaz: a cobbler
Hefhi: carpet maker
Hidi: one twin fathered by the trickster god, Onondu; brother is Makuo. Hidi is “the angry one”
hijab: Islamic headscarf (not to be confused with hajib)
the Hill: where the Kings live; a/k/a Tauriyat
Hoav: driver who takes Ramahd to the inner docks
House of Kings: a collective name for the House of Maidens and the thirteen palaces on Tauriyat, the home of the Kings of Sharakhai