Home Tears

  No doubt.

  “So, what’s so special about these mussels?” If she was going to lose her secret spot, she might as well know what the sacrifice was for. If it was worthwhile.

  Trenton flashed another blinding grin, and Dani remembered why he’d been their prom king, but he remained silent, letting Jonah do the explanation.

  “There’s a few different benefits from this find.” Jonah started out, and Dani realized how truly excited he was. He really did love this river. “The first is that this mussel was thought to be extinct, and this bed is the largest bed of mussels I’ve ever heard about. That’s huge for Falls River because it means it’s pretty damn healthy considering the dam blocks up the water’s travel. The more mussels, the healthier the water system. Plus, they have a natural grey pearl inside. The financial market’s going to go crazy over the grey pearl.”

  It was a bit astounding how one piece of shell could ensure a river’s safety. Dani lifted one of the mussels out of the bucket and held it up.

  “It looks disgusting.” Its shell was slimy, black, and repulsive. A dead fish hung off the side of it.

  Jonah and Trenton laughed.

  Trenton piped up, “That’s its decoy for fish. Fish bite onto it, thinking they’re about to have a meal. The glochidia are released inside, and voila, the mussel just landed itself a plane ride for its little babies. The female mussel has her eggs transported into this glochidia stuff. The fish carries it downstream until they drop and form little baby mussels.”

  “Smart little buggars.”

  “Nah—they’re just another part of nature.” Jonah stood up and kicked off his diving fins. “Nature’s pretty damn miraculous if we wouldn’t stop killing it.”

  Dani glanced up, a little startled at the vehemence in his tone. Jonah had always been charming. A good ol’ boy who drew the ladies in like bees to honey. She’d heard of his ruthlessness in business dealings, but she’d never seen him angered. She heard it now, laying just underneath the bitterness.

  “I never would’ve thought the two of you would become nature lovers.” She asked, “What do you need to help this research study go faster?”

  “What?”

  “You said you only had two months. What do you need? Volunteers? Money?”

  “This needs to be as quiet as possible.” Jonah held up a hand. “We don’t even know if this is the mussel we’re thinking about. The research team is going to identify it, no matter what species it is.”

  “Why wait a month? Why can’t they be here before then?”

  “That’s as soon as we can get the funding for their travel arrangements. They’re coming out on our request, but getting the okay for their travel and hotel accommodations takes a while. Red tape can be a bitch.”

  “How much money?”

  “I don’t know. Probably twenty thousand, at least. More like fifty thousand.”

  “I’ll pay.” Dani wanted to help. In that moment, she needed to do this. Forget all the damn tragedies that happened in her past. This was her way of helping. This project could potentially mean more than their whole town. She wanted on board.

  “No, Dani, we can’t take your money.”

  She had money. They just didn’t know how much, or where it came from. Both stories she wanted to keep quiet about, too. “I want to help. Consider this an investment.”

  Jonah studied her, gauging her commitment. Dani knew what he was doing. He wanted to make sure this was a clear-headed decision, not an emotional one. There was emotion underlying, but Dani clamped down and let her professionalism shine through. Boone always said there was no room for emotion in the boardroom.

  “I’m single, young, and I’ve already got a home. I can invest my money how I choose. This is one of them, and this is a good investment.”

  “This might not be a profitable investment.”

  “Nonprofit grants are great tax write-offs.” She had no clue.

  Jonah hid a smile, but Dani saw it. She won and she held her hand out. Another second pause, but Jonah reached out and shook on it.

  “I’m going to be swimming with you guys, at least some of the times. Part of the deal.”

  “Fine by me,” Trenton added, slipping back into the water. “We need all the help we can get.” He took the bucket, saying, “I’m going to swim these out to the boat. It’s almost quitting time anyway.”

  Dani studied Jonah, as Trenton left. “So this is what you do on the weekdays.”

  “My job description is flexible. I’m supposed to protect the river. Science is slower than business deals. Weekends are an easy sacrifice if it means what I think it’ll mean.” Jonah checked his watch and murmured, “Aiden informed me to inform you, that you have to be somewhere tonight. They’re emceeing a talent show, and your presence is required.” His eyes traced her face and slowly slid downward.

  Dani’s mouth was suddenly parched.

  “I won’t push you right now, but I can’t help but wonder what other secrets you got hidden?” His eyes darkened, lingering on her lips.

  She’d been right. He hadn’t bought the lie.

  Kate and Aiden were dancing a jig on the stage.

  Dani skimmed the crowd. Robbie was waving his arms, seated at a round picnic table. As she neared, Dani saw Jonah at a nearby table with Hawk, his arm around a woman with pigtails, and another two guys who Dani recognized from high school.

  “Hey, Dani! We saved you a seat.” Robbie kicked out the empty chair on his left. Stilts was on her other side, with his arm around another girl. Lori sat on Robbie’s right with both their chairs turned toward the center stage.

  Kate was saying, “…we were given an announcement to make from the baking committee. They wanted to let you know that due to the sale on lemon pie filling at our wonderful sponsors, Deano’s Supermarket, there has been an influx of lemon meringue pies for the pie contest.” As the crowd started to laugh, Kate kept on, “So they’re going to divide the contest into two sections. One section will be just the lemon meringue pies while the other will be the general pie contest. They will award two winners because of this event.”

  Aiden laughed, dipping closer to the microphone. “Please still bring lemon meringue pies next year.”

  Kate commented as she tried to muffle her microphone, but the crowd still heard, “My pie’s one of those. I’m so embarrassed.”

  The crowd went wild.

  Kate blushed while Aiden patted her friend on the back. “Don’t worry, Kate. There were twenty lemon meringue pies this year. We hit a record!”

  Another scream filled the air. At the same time, Kate began to announce the next act, but Aiden’s microphone caught her. “Bryant, you will drop your sister’s hair now!”

  Kate started laughing in the middle of pronouncing the act’s name.

  Aiden flushed this time and murmured to the crowd, “Sorry.” She left the stage, and everyone heard, “Leave your brother alone! Or no pizza tonight. I mean it!”

  Kate shook her head, still grinning, as she departed on the opposite side.

  Dani sat back and listened to their fantastic attempts at a high E, but she saw Jake and Julia on the opposite side, surrounding a similar table to their own. Kelley Lynn and the rest filled the other seats next to them.

  Jake had been watching her and nodded. Dani waved.

  Julia frowned.

  That bothered her, and without thinking, Dani got up. She began to walk around the crowd. Julia’s eyes widened when Dani kept walking her way.

  She stopped right in front of her. “Can I talk to you? Just you and me?”

  “No crowd to cheer you on?”

  Dani flinched. “You and me? Please?”

  Julia stood, and Dani led the way.

  Why was she doing this? She wasn’t sure, but it felt right. They were center stage. All eyes were on them, but Dani didn’t care. She was starting to care less and less, and when she found a private corner between two horse trailers, she turned around.

  “When
did we become enemies? Sometime in our childhood? When Mom died? When?”

  Julia looked down at her hands. She was fidgeting with her shirt. “Why are you doing this?”

  “I don’t know,” Dani admitted. “Maybe because I’m tired of hating something, but not knowing what I’m supposed to hate. Maybe because I’m tired of this supposed ‘fight’ between us. I don’t hate you, Julia. You’re my sister.” Her words hung in the air. She repeated them, “You’re my sister. We share so much.”

  “Like what?” Julia snorted.

  “We both lost our mother. We both lost a sister. We both weren’t taught how to love each other. And we both loved the same man.”

  Julia looked away and turned her back. Dani saw her wrap her arms around herself. It took a second, but she heard, “I love him. Present day. I love him now.”

  “And I remember my love for him.”

  Julia’s shoulders arched upward. Dani heard the soft sniffle from behind. Her sister was crying. Her supposedly heartless sister was crying.

  “I don’t want Jake back.” Dani took a breath. “I left that night and he and I, we haven’t gone through the process of seeing each other again when we weren’t together. Does that make sense? I’ve thought about him with someone else, but now I’m back. We have to go through that process of seeing each other not together for closure, but I don’t want him. I don’t love him anymore.”

  “But you used to.” Julia turned back, her hand to her face, as if just waiting to swipe another tear before it trickled down.

  “I did.” She had loved him so much. “It took an entire year before I didn’t think about him when I woke up in the mornings. A year.”

  “You left us.”

  Dani stiffened.

  Julia lifted her chin up, challenging her. “You didn’t tell anyone. You have no idea what you put us through.”

  “Put you through what?” Dani narrowed her eyes. She must’ve heard her sister wrong. The sister who never wanted her around. The sister who always took Erica’s side in every fight. The sister who barely talked to her, even when they were children. She would come in the house, laughing, and look around for someone to share whatever had made her laugh. She’d see Dani, and that light would dim in her eyes. Every time. She’d find Erica or Kathryn to tell, and Dani would hear them laughing together from the next room.

  “Ten years, Julia.” She closed her eyes. “I went through twenty-two years of torture from you and Erica. Twenty-two to your ten?” She shook her head. There was no comparison.

  “It was a selfish, thoughtless act that you did. You have no idea what you put Erica through—”

  “What I put Erica through? Erica?!” Dani cocked her head to the side. Maybe her hearing was actually going? “Erica was probably the first to celebrate I left. She wasn’t this perfect little princess everyone pretends she was. She might’ve changed at the end, but she wasn’t perfect. She was far from it.”

  Julia paled. “You don’t even dare—”

  “She stole boyfriends.”

  Julia gasped.

  “She cheated on her boyfriends.”

  “Shut up.”

  Dani pressed, “She lied. She backstabbed. She called the cops on at least six of her friends’ parties. She stole money from you, Aunt Kathryn, and me—she probably stole from friends. She sent one girl to a psychiatric hospital. Erica wasn’t a saint, and I’m tired of you acting like she was.”

  Julia refused to look at her. She turned to the side, and raised her head even higher. If she’d been looking at Dani, she would’ve been literally looking down her nose at her. “You shouldn’t say those things, not about Erica. She’s not here to defend herself.”

  “She doesn’t need to be.”

  “We all know why you left. Stop blaming Erica for everything. So what? Yes, she stole Jake. Well, I have him now. Are you going to talk about me how you’re talking about Erica? I’m alive, Dani. What are you going to say about me when I die?” A shrill laugh slipped from her.

  “I just told you that I’m not here for Jake.”

  “Then why’d you come back?” She whipped back around to face Dani fully. Her nostrils flared. “Why are you here? We were fine without you.”

  Dani felt slapped in the face. The real Julia just stepped forward. “Not even thirty seconds ago, you were saying how could I have left and put you through…what? What did I put you through? You’re mad I’m back, not that I left. That’s the truth. Isn’t it?”

  “Stop it, Dani.” Julia hissed. “You know what I meant.”

  “Yeah,” She bit out. “What I just said. You’re mad I came back.”

  “This isn’t your town anymore.”

  This wasn’t her home.

  “Jake’s mine.”

  Not yours.

  “Aunt Kathryn wants nothing to do with you.”

  She never had.

  Julia’s eyes were irate. Her skinny arms and hands pressed against her side. If she’d been a violent woman, Dani would’ve braced for a slap. She was wary, waiting for it, but Julia started crying again. She didn’t sniffle this time, or make a sound. The tears slid down and Julia didn’t react. Dani wondered if her sister even knew they were there. And in that moment, she felt farther away from her sister than when she’d been on the other side of the ocean.

  There was a river of secrets, lies, and alliances between them. One stood on one side, the other across from her.

  Dani saw it all, and felt an undercurrent of exhaustion sweep underneath her. It pulled her down. “I asked to talk tonight because I don’t want to be your enemy.”

  Julia’s eyes twitched. Her lips pressed together. She said nothing.

  “But maybe that was wishful thinking?”

  The crowd clapped in the background. Whatever act had been performing, must’ve been a hit, and the crowd roared again in approval. Her lip curved in a sad smile. Maybe that was her cue to walk away.

  Dani raked a hand through her hair. “Look, you have my word.”

  Julia turned back to her.

  “I do not want Jake. I can’t promise that we won’t talk, but I can promise that we won’t be friends. We won’t hang out together. We won’t be anything. All we’ll be is two people who grew up together, and two people connected through you.” And Erica, the silent ghost still haunting them. Dani didn’t mention her. “And for what it’s worth, I did tell someone.”

  Julia didn’t ask, but her eyes sharpened.

  “I told Kathryn I was leaving. It was her choice not to share that information.”

  The show went off without a hitch.

  A few acts stumbled, but Kate and Aiden covered for them, a smart joke delivered with tongue-in-cheek. The last act finished with a bang, a literal bang of the cymbals. One of the lemon meringue pie winners marched onto the stage banging a pair of cymbals together. Kate asked her to stay as the rest of the winners were announced, and each time the cymbals led the applause.

  When the last winner was called up to the stage, Dani wanted to avoid any conversation so she moved through the animal barns. She hadn’t had the time to visit the night prior amidst the beer and angry outbursts.

  Heading into the beef barn, she saw Jake at the opposite doorway. He stood, leaning against the doorway, hands shoved in his pockets. He was in plain clothes, and he looked good. As she walked to him, slowly, Dani saw why each O’Hara had fallen for him.

  It wasn’t just his outside. His heart was on his sleeve, and he gave it wholeheartedly.

  The straw crunched underneath her feet as she stopped before him. The fans whirred in the background, shooting streams of air