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Elephant Small Vol 3

Stanski


Elephant Small

  Vol 3

  Stanski

  Copyright©2013 Stanski

  Crawling Distance

  In Decline

  The Night Jasmine

  The Fourth Millennium

  Hotel 27

  A Fetish For Frustration

  Elephant Small Vol 1

  Elephant Small Vol 2

  Cover photo © Stanski

  Elephant Small

  Vol 3

  Contents

  1. A Cure For Love?

  2. Forever Ago

  3. Saturday

  4. Ask Me If I Like Hospitals

  5. Holiday

  6. M14

  7. Occupied Territories

  8. Uppasak Pharsar- Language Barrier

  9. Rain Dance

  10 American Sandwich Blues

  11. Life On Earth?

  12. Final Cut

  13. Front Stabbers

  14. Give Me – Take You

  15. Winter In May

  16. Just Do What It Says On The Label

  17. Underwear

  18. Counting To Ten Doesn’t Always Work

  19. Homework

  20. Road To Nowhere

  21. Resolution

  22. No Oil Painting

  23. Hidden Gem

  24. Whatever

  25. After The Drought

  26. Just A Thought

  27. Influence

  28. Put Everything Together

  29. The Day after Tomorrow

  30. Trinity

  31. Fountain Of Tears

  32. Plans For The Evening

  33. The Climb

  34. Investigation

  35. Noi’s Ninth In f-Major

  36. Digital Display

  37. Unwanted Gifts

  38. Where There’s Life, There’s Hope

  39. Recession Persists

  40. Untouchable

  41. Workaholics

  42. Thanksgiving

  43. Number’s Up

  44. Starter’s Orders

  45. Twennyten

  46. Unworthy

  47. Grow Old Along With Me, The Best Is Yet To Be

  48. Do This Zombie A Favour

  49. Fiction; foul Play?

  50. This Day

  About The Author

  1. A Cure For Love?

  When Doctor Love came to town

  To cure the ‘stood up’, ‘let down’

  He hired a stadium

  And The Palladium

  Such was his world renown

  The tickets were sold out; gone

  No seats for the love-sick; none

  Intended for only

  The sad and the lonely

  It turns out that’s everyone

  2. Forever Ago

  A

  lonely

  man must wait

  At last she comes

  Claims her love will last

  for ever … never fade

  Dreaded vote of confidence

  precedes her planned intention

  Terms, conditions, warnings, threats

  In place of passion – tension

  accusations, denials

  questionable endeavour

  She leaves as dawn announces

  the first day of forever

  Alone again so soon

  a man considers

  How rapidly

  ‘Forever’

  becomes

  a

  distant memory

  3. Saturday

  Kippax, Kop

  Stretford End

  North Bank, South Bank

  Fan-base blend

  Murmur – calm

  Cheer – thrill

  Chant – passion

  Whistle - shrill

  Man to man

  Heart to heart

  Mouth to mouth

  From the start

  Outside Left

  To Inside Right

  To Centre Forward

  Goal in sight

  In the box

  Odds-on bet

  ‘Keeper dives…

  Offside, yet

  Half-time news

  Who’s in front?

  Oohs and Aahs

  Comments, blunt

  Lukewarm Bovril

  Tommy Hall’s

  Greasy Joe’s

  To line the walls

  Second half

  Goals galore

  Rovers, Rovers

  What’s the score?

  (Rovers, what’s the score?)

  Referee’s

  Final blow

  Who’s the best?

  Now we know

  Four-nil win

  Fans depart

  Pundits probe

  Inquests start

  Bus-ride home

  Glad we came

  So much more

  Than just a game

  4. Ask Me If I Like Hospitals

  Don’t ask me if I like hospitals

  Don’t ask me; try asking someone else

  Ask me if you really want to know

  About why I don’t like hospitals

  Overcrowded, congested foyer

  Full of theatre gown clad patients

  Some are in wheelchairs, others in beds

  All of them hooked up to saline drips

  All exhausted, stressed and frustrated

  Nurses (with clipboards) dashing about

  Doctors (with stethoscopes) dressed in white

  Porters follow-my-leader, pushing

  Trolleys laden with medication

  Public address playing pop music

  Every few seconds interrupted

  By hysterical-sounding voices

  ‘Such and such a doctor must report

  To such and such a ward right away’

  This must be why my head is spinning

  This must be why my heart is racing

  It must be time to make my exit

  Atmosphere is intoxicating

  Such a chaotic, surreal scene

  Along with that antiseptic smell

  That lingers inside all hospitals

  Causes me to consider reasons

  Why I’ve always hated hospitals

  The underlying, subconscious fear

  Of faulty surgical procedures?

  The knowledge that so many people

  Enter on their feet; leave in a box?

  I don’t know for sure; I only think

  That hospitals are nasty places

  That it would be good if they were more

  Like in ‘Carry On’ films…but they’re not

  So no wonder nobody likes them

  5. Holiday

  I’m lying on my favourite beach

  Soaking up sun rays, breathing in scents

  My three best friends are absent this year

  Due to other commitments

  We’d holidayed here in Ninety Six

  I remember it like yesterday

  Each morning we’d awake to the cry

  “Surf’s up – grab your boards – let’s play!”

  Never a surfer, so I’d decline

  Though I’d promised to give it a go

  In truth, I was scared of the ocean

  And dangers that lie below

  Closing my eyes, I go back in time

  Reliving those moments of magic

  Trespassing on happy memories

  Images, dark and tragic

  Suddenly, my worst fears were confirmed

  From beneath the surf, Kraken rising

  And twenty subterranean beasts

  Intent on terrorising

  Panic broke out on the crowded beach

  As sunbathers scramble caused mayhem

  I tried to warn
my three surfing friends

  Of monsters, out to slay them

  My pointing and shouting were in vain

  My voice wouldn’t carry that distance

  Oblivious to blood-thirsty beasts

  They offered no resistance

  I could do nothing for those at sea

  ‘Natural’ disaster, so They say

  Dismembered body parts washed ashore

  On that fateful, fatal day

  A backpacker sits down beside me

  He’s travelled for years, I don’t doubt it

  “If it’s your first time at this resort

  I’ll tell you all about it

  The beach is great, and the night-life rocks

  But not as good as it used to be…

  …You should have been here in Ninety Six…”

  “I was…just now…you woke me”

  6. M14

  We were eating seventeen we bought from Thom’s Place (1)

  On the corner where the Princess kisses Greame (2)

  We considered six or seven in the Claremont (3)

  Lights out twelve catch us forty and a dream (4)

  Six black mice guide a carriage through the rust storm

  To ensure on-time express delivery

  Blinking lights, durian sherbet; confusing thoughts

  Waking up in a panic – WHERE ARE WE?

  From thirty three it’s seven on the forty one (5)

  You can do it in about twenty five (6)

  From thirty two it’s five, but it always takes two (7)

  Get two fifty, then get one-o-five

  Or get one-o-three, perhaps choose one-o-nine (8)

  You’ll do the job in fifteen or twenty (9)

  You’ll never be stuck if you’re coming from the south

  If you do it by bus there are plenty

  *Metrolink* will get you to the centre of Town

  Then buses south will go down Wilmslow Road

  Don’t get too relaxed, you know it’s only a mile

  So check out all the landmarks as you go

  **Refuge Assurance clock, now the Palace Phallus

  Past the Universities and MRI

  Whitworth Art, The Curry Mile, then any right turn**

  And the land of M14 meets your eye (10)

  Cocktails are now being served. Today’s special is:

  DURIAN SHERBET

  The order:

  “Durian Sherbet

  Agitated, not disturbed”

  Best drink of the day!

  The ingredients:

  Puréed Durian

  ***Home distilled ‘Isan’ Lao Khao***

  Sun-dried chilli flakes

  1 - Number 17 on the menu (Chicken Chow Mein) at Thom’s Fish Bar (an unlikely name for a Chinese take-away)

  2 - The junction of Princess Road and Greame Street

  (I think it should be GrAEme, but everyone says CREAM anyway)

  3 - Six or Seven in the Claremont – 6 or 7 pints of Holts Bitter in the Claremont Pub.

  4 – In bed by midnight, forty winks (sleep) and dream

  5 – 33 (M33) is the post code for the town of Sale, 7 miles away, 41 is the bus route

  7 – 32 (M32) is the post code for the town of Stretford, five miles away, but it’s a two bus journey

  8 – 250, 105, 103, 109 are all bus routes

  9 - Buses are frequent so the journey only takes 15 or 20 minutes

  *-* - Metrolink is Manchester’s Rapid Transit System/Tram Route

  **-** - The Palace hotel used to be the Refuge Assurance building, its clock tower is a huge Phallic symbol

  You pass Manchester Metropolitan University (formerly Manchester Polytechnic) as well as Manchester University itself, Manchester Royal Infirmary (among other large hospitals) and Whitworth Art Gallery, before hitting The Curry Mile (rows of shops), most of which are Indian/Asian/Halal restaurants

  10 – M14 is the post code for Rusholme/Moss Side, Manchester, UK

  ***-*** - Isan is the north-east region of Thailand - Lao Khao is Rice Liquor

  7. Occupied Territories

  Father had a painfully acute

  Understanding of occupation

  And the scope of its consequences

  His home country having first of all

  Been occupied by the Right wingers,

  The Fascists, who entered from stage left,

  And subsequently by Left Wingers,

  Communists, who entered from stage right

  Another time and another place?

  A temporary situation?

  A one-way ticket out, to the world

  May have been a physical escape.

  Brutal mental torture, however

  Continued, sadly, ever after

  8. Uppasak Pharsar – Language Barrier

  ผม พูด อึก ครั้ง หนึ่ง

  ใน ถ้อย คำ คุณ เข้า ใจ ได้

  ภาษา ต่าง ประเทศ ?

  อุปสรรค ภาษา

  ภาษา ต่าง ประเทศ

  คำ พูด ผม เข้า ใจ ไม่ ได้

  พูด อึก ครั้ง หนึ่ง ครับ

  Phom phoot eek khrang nung

  Nai thoi kham khun khao chai dai

  Pharsar tarng pratet?

  UPPASAK PHARSAR

  Pharsar tarng pratet

  Kham phoot phom khao chai mai dai

  Phoot eek khrang nung khrap

  I’ll tell you again

  In words you can understand

  A foreign language?

  LANGUAGE BARRIER

  A foreign language

  Words I cannot understand

  Please tell me again

  9. Rain Dance

  (A Song)

  It starts raining - Outside

  I start hurting - Inside

  And although I’ve tried

  To hide the tears I’ve cried/denied

  You can see through - My lies

  When you look in - My eyes

  You’re so wise you realise

  The guise I prize/despise

  It’s a love/hate - on/off - yes/no - circumstance

  I blow hot and cold - You admit/deny romance

  Opposites attract

  It’s a well-known fact

  It’s a mystery why we adopt this stance

  Is our freeze/thaw take

  The mistake we make?

  As we learn the lessons that’s how we’ll advance

  It’s still raining - Outside

  You’re still hurting - Inside

  And although you’ve tried

  To hide the tears you’ve cried/denied

  I can see through - Your lies

  When I look in - Your eyes

  I’m so wise I realise

  The guise you prize/despise

  It’s a love/hate - on/off - yes/no circumstance

  You blow hot and cold

  I admit/deny romance

  How do we compare?

  You’re CRADLE; I’m SNARE

  But you put me in a deep hypnotic trance

  Not a PERFECT match

  An unlikely catch

  We both know the value of a second chance

  We don’t count the cost

  Of a fortune lost

  We just pay the price…And get on…with the dance

  It stops raining - Outside

  We stop hurting - Inside…

  10. American Sandwich Blues

  Well I woke up this morning

  body aching

  and my head in a spin.

  Said I woke up this morning

  shaking memories

  from under my skin

  Can’t take it too much longer

  ‘cos your mind-play

  is a game I can’t win.

  11. Life On Earth?

  As jasmine-fragrant shadows ride the breeze

 
; I gaze into the star filled midnight sky

  As deep and dark and fathomless as time

  Or any frozen ocean that exists

  On any planet; any galaxy

  Contained within the vastness of the night

  Sound effects – nocturnal chorus chirp

  In digital surround sound stereo;

  A rustling; almost imperceptible

  Amid the trees and unkempt undergrowth

  …The only clues that I am not alone

  …That other life has walked on planet Earth

  12. Final Cut

  TV network broadcasts

  Capture action at the links

  Live satellite transmission

  Covers thirteenth fairway jinx

  Hex leaves me out of focus

  Forces double-bogey putt

  Fast forward; five straight birdies

  Qualify for final cut

  13. Front Stabbers

  ‘Pacey’s’ doin’ me shed in again

  Said ‘e was sackin’ the blag

  Next thing yer know, ‘e’s givin’ us grief

  Scavvin’ ‘n’ back on the rag

  ‘Sharky Starkey’ grafts as a parky

  Smokes sixty bifters a day

  ‘Undred ‘n’ twenny six quid a week

  Out of his green-keepers pay…?

  ‘Tosser’ Tom sez “Lend us a bluey

  I’ll weigh yer in when I’m straight

  I’m just off up town fer a turn-on

  Man, yer a star; sorted mate”

  ‘Bazza’s’ got forty brick in ‘is bin

  Doin’ a bit fer the crack

  Rakin’ it in an’ givin’ it large

  Taking the piss outta ‘Mac’

  ‘Mac’s’ off ‘is ‘ead because of ‘is bird

  ‘Oo everybody’s bangin’

  She’s getting’ ‘er snatch out fer the lads

  ‘Bazza’ sez she was ‘angin’

  ‘Billy The Beer Monster’s’ skint ‘e sez

  An’ ‘e’s pitchin’ fer a sub

  Give ‘im some shrapnel, ‘e’ll waste it well

  Getting’ leathered down the pub

  Football fan ‘Freddo’ knows all the jibs

  Got it sussed ‘ome ‘n’ away

  Under the turnstiles; over a wall

  Where there’s a will there’s…’Freddo’

  * * *

  That’s me mad muckers; seven sound blokes

  Let me explain just in case