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Stolen Kisses, Page 8

Ruth Cardello


  Lexi and Willa exchanged a look.

  Lexi said, “You told us all about it when we were in high school.”

  Mortified, Kenzi’s mouth dropped open. “I did?”

  Willa made a face and shrugged awkwardly. “It was when we first met you. You were wasted.”

  “You never said anything,” Kenzi said slowly.

  Lexi moved over to sit next to Kenzi. “We knew you didn’t want to talk about it.”

  Willa sat on her other side. “We were so worried about you when we first met you, but then you seemed to put it behind you.”

  Lexi gave her shoulder a supportive pat. “But it’s why we knew coming home would be hard for you.”

  Kenzi looked back and forth at her two friends. They’d attended college together so they could remain close, but she just realized they’d gone a step further for her. “So you came to Boston with me.”

  Lexi shrugged one shoulder. “We didn’t have a lot tying us to Nova Scotia.”

  “And you’re our family,” Willa and Lexi said in unison. They exchanged another look and both said, “by choice.”

  “I love you two.” Kenzi used a tissue to dab away a tear before it spilled forth.

  “We love you, too,” Lexi and Willa said together.

  With a small smile, Kenzi said, “When you two get like this it’s a little creepy.”

  “Like what?” they both asked, looked at each other, then laughed.

  Willa pointed to her sister then herself. “The twin thing. Most of the time I look at Lexi and think we couldn’t be more different, then when we get excited about something—”

  “We sort of know what the other is thinking. It’s weird,” Lexi finished.

  “I know,” Kenzi said. She’d seen it happen many times over the span of their friendship, but their connection was always a little disconcerting. Would I have had the same connection to my twin? Could we have read each other’s minds? What ifs could drive me to distraction. Fascinating as it was to talk to them about being twins, it wasn’t why Kenzi had asked them over. “Okay, so back to what I was saying. What are my options? I don’t want an all-out family war. I don’t want to hurt my mother, but I want to find my voice. I want to do something that makes up for what I didn’t do. I don’t know. Is it too late? Am I being ridiculous?”

  Willa gave her a hug. “No, you’re being the Kenzi we love. You’re a good person, and you don’t like to hurt anyone. That’s why you never said anything. But what if talking about what happened to you could help someone? What if it could stop someone from putting themselves in dangerous situations?”

  Lexi snapped her fingers in the air. “I know what you should do. Public speaking gigs pay really well. Remember the last one, Willa? Three hundred dollars and all we had to do was talk about dental floss at a conference. You could make money and help people.”

  Willa rolled her eyes. “Lexi, she doesn’t need the money.”

  Lexi plopped back against the couch. “Oh, yeah.” Then she sat forward as another idea hit her. “Do it for charity, then. Same thing, but better.”

  Kenzi nodded slowly as she considered it. “I have heard about speakers who go into high schools and help raise awareness on subjects like this. I never imagined myself as one of those people, though.”

  Willa hugged her. “You’d be perfect at it, Kenzi. Look at how long you’ve kept your silence because you’ve been afraid to say anything. Imagine if hearing you talk about what happened could help another woman face her own fears. Girls in high school need to hear that if they drink, they put themselves in danger. And if they decide to do it anyway, they need to watch out for each other. Or that when something does happen, no matter what they think, they can survive it. You could make a difference that way.”

  Kenzi held one hand of each of her friends and blinked back her tears. “Remember the idea I had for a reality show? I understand why I wanted it now. I was still too afraid to talk about what happened to me, and I thought everything would be better if it all came out—regardless of how. But I was wrong. This is my story, my message, and it’s time for me to control it instead of the other way around. You’re right, I can tell it my way. I refuse to be afraid anymore. Thank you.”

  Willa’s eyes teared up as well. “Should I write this down?”

  Kenzi chuckled. She felt stronger even though nothing had actually changed yet, nothing outside of her anyway. She could hear Dax’s voice in her head telling her that she was in control of what happened to her and always would be. He’d been referring to sex, but Kenzi saw how little of a say she’d had in her life as a whole. She could accept that that’s the way it was, or she could finally take a stand. “No, I’ve got this. I’ll make a few calls. I bet there are organizations who do this and are in need of fundraising. I’m really good at that. I learned from the best.” My mom. She rubbed her hands over her face. “Now for the million-dollar question—do I tell my family now or after I’ve gone public?”

  A few days later Dax met Clay for an evening jog by the Charles River. Clay wasn’t admitting to it, but Dax was reasonably certain he was sticking around Boston in case all hell broke loose. So far each time Clay had brought up Poly-Shyn or Kenzi, Dax had refused to comment on either. Their friendship had survived many years because they knew each other well enough to know when to push and when to wait for the other to work things out on his own.

  When their jog wound down to a walk, Dax wiped the sweat from his face with one hand and took in a long, cleansing breath. “I told my team we’re backing off Poly-Shyn.”

  Clay stretched as he walked. “That’s a wise decision.”

  “It was exactly as you said: the fallout outweighed the potential profit.”

  “So it had nothing to do with that Barrington woman?”

  “Why would it?”

  “Oh, I don’t know, maybe because you’re sleeping with her.”

  “I’m not sleeping with her.”

  “Not yet?”

  “Not yet. Not going to.”

  Clay shook his head in confusion. “Then what are you still doing in Boston?”

  “I do have an office here and other projects I’m working on.”

  “That has never kept you stateside. Listen, you look like shit. You completely dropped the ball on the island sale. I sent you two potential buyers, and you blew them off. I call your office and you’re not there half the time. Are you in some kind of trouble?”

  Dax stopped and watched a woman walk her dog onto the grass beside the path. She put down a small blanket, sat down on it, and called the dog over to sit on her lap. She took out a tablet and started reading something while petting her dog absently with her other hand. He pictured Kenzi in the woman’s place and remembered the conversation they’d had about pets. Kenzi had grown up wealthy but also oddly deprived. In his experience women who were born into money as she had been were shallow creatures who cared more about what they were wearing than anything else. Kenzi was humble and grateful.

  He thought about how she’d been raised, what had happened to her, and how the combination had shaped the beautiful woman she was. He hadn’t called her for the same reason he hadn’t kissed her, she was fragile and he wouldn’t take advantage of that. She hadn’t made that decision easy for him. There’d been times when she’d looked at him and he’d known he could have her in his bed if he wanted, but then what?

  It was that last question that was new to him. Never before had he cared enough to ask—then what?

  Every scenario he ran in his head concluded with her being hurt when it ended between them. And it would end. Everything did.

  The only solution he’d come up with was to not give in to the sexual attraction he had for her. If she called, he’d help her, but that’s all. They couldn’t be more.

  “Dax?”

  “Sorry.” Dax’s attention returned to the present. “I forgot your question.”

  Clay waved a finger at him. “That’s my point. I’ve known you a long time, an
d I’ve never seen you like this. You can tell me it’s none of my business, but what the hell is wrong with you?”

  Dax looked back at the woman on the blanket. “If you wanted a dog, where would you get one?”

  “A dog? Seriously?”

  “Not for me.”

  “For Kenzi Barrington?”

  “If she wants one, she deserves to have one.”

  “Oh, boy. Is Kenzi the reason you walked away from Poly-Shyn?”

  “Yes. No. Fuck, it’s complicated.” Almost as complicated as tracking down the guy who had hurt Kenzi in high school only to discover he’d died in prison. From what Dax could uncover, the man had been convicted of stealing expensive cars from rich kids, but his ultimate punishment had come at the hands of a fellow inmate after bragging about liking young girls. Some crimes were too heinous for even a criminal to stomach. He ran a hand through his hair. “I’d like to see her happy, that’s all.”

  “So she didn’t ask you to back off the Henderson’s company?”

  “No, but Dean Henderson isn’t as bad as I thought he was. He’ll lose the company anyway, but it won’t be at my hands.”

  Clay turned and started jogging in place. “As fascinating as all of this is, I have a date tonight—with a woman I’m going to sleep with. That’s the way it’s supposed to work, Dax. You like a woman, you fuck her. You don’t spare her old boyfriend’s company, and you definitely don’t buy her a puppy.”

  Dax fell into a jog beside Clay as they headed back the way they’d come. “She never dated Dean. I had a complete investigation done. They were friends. Nothing more.”

  Clay asked in a serious tone, “Promise me something?”

  “What?”

  “If I ever get like you are right now, beat the shit out of me.”

  Dax gave Clay a hearty shove. “I should do it now.” He wasn’t serious and they both knew it.

  Clay’s stumbled but laughed more and quickly righted himself. “Hey, be careful when choosing a dog for a woman you’re falling for. Remember, those things live a while. You could end up with it at the end of your bed. Oh, wait, you have no intention of sleeping with her so that’s fine.”

  “Shut the fuck up.”

  Chapter Eight

  A week later, Kenzi stepped out of her apartment in slacks, a blouse, and a blazer. Even though she was on her way to do something she normally would have found terrifying, she felt stronger than she had in a long time. She looked around the hallway and was pleased to see it empty. Although she’d hated doing it, she’d let Parker go. She’d given him a great reference and one of her friends had hired him almost instantly, so there was no guilt.

  There was also no sign that her brothers had replaced him, likely because they didn’t know he was gone. For the first time in her life, Kenzi’s phone wasn’t ringing with calls from her family. She’d gone to see her parents and apologized because it was what her parents expected. Her mother had asked questions, but Kenzi knew she wasn’t ready to hear the answers. Or, rather, Kenzi wasn’t ready for the fallout yet. She asked her parents to give her time to work out a few things on her own. Although her mother hadn’t been happy when she’d left, they’d come to an understanding of sorts.

  Kenzi could think clearer about what she wanted to do once her family was, however temporarily, out of the equation. She contacted a not-for-profit organization that worked to bring speakers to high schools on a variety of social issues. After interviewing her, they thought she would be a perfect fit for their program. They helped her choose the best way to tell her story, light on the details, heavy on how she’d felt and how she’d survived it. Each time she told her story, she felt more empowered, freer. She was ready to share it now with an auditorium of students. At first she’d thought it would only be girls, but the program director had said that boys needed to hear her, too.

  The news media hadn’t been invited, which didn’t mean the story wouldn’t get out, but Kenzi was okay with whatever happened. Part of her thought she should have gone to her parents and told them what she was about to do, but this was for her, and they would have to understand that.

  There was one person she wanted to tell. She’d wavered back and forth if she should. After all, she hadn’t heard from him again. Still, she had something to say that went beyond the physical attraction between them. From the backseat of a taxi she called Dax.

  “Kenzi.”

  “Do you have a minute?”

  “Always.” He made a sound like he was shuffling something around then said, “What’s up?”

  She blurted out that she was speaking at a high school about what had happened to her. She didn’t give herself time to second-guess if she should be telling him. Instead she rushed to the reason she had called. “If I hadn’t met you, I might not have found the courage to do this the right way. I was scared and I was angry, and that muddled my message. I felt out of control because I was out of control. Being honest with you allowed me to be honest with myself. You’re probably praying for the day I stop calling you like this, but I had to tell you thank you. Nothing in my life has changed yet, but I have.” After an awkward silence, Kenzi said, “So, thank you again.”

  Dax cleared his throat. “Kenzi, all I did was listen.”

  “Exactly,” she said softly. “That’s all I needed. Anyway, I’m sure you’re busy, but I feel really good about what I’m doing today. Really good. And I thought you should know.”

  “Do you have anyone going with you?”

  Kenzi clutched the phone. He would have gone if she’d asked him to. No matter what happened between them, it was impossible not to fall a little in love with him for that. “Two of my friends are going. Then they’re taking me to lunch.”

  “Will you be home after that?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good.”

  Kenzi expected him to say he wanted to see her or to ask her somewhere, but he didn’t. She held her breath and waited.

  “I’m in meetings most of the day, but if you need me, call.”

  Kenzi let out a shaky breath. “I’ll be fine. Thanks, Dax.” She hung up before she gave in to the impulse to ask him to come over. They were friends of a sort, and she told herself she’d find a way to be okay with that.

  A few minutes later Kenzi was standing at a podium in front of a thousand high school students. The room was hushed as they waited for her to speak. Once she started speaking, once her story was out there, there would be no turning back. No more pretending. She remembered the director’s advice to speak slowly and prayed she didn’t hyperventilate. She started to introduce herself, stopped, and took a quick sip of water. Just then she met the eyes of a girl in the first row. She didn’t look bored as some of the others did. She wasn’t secretly texting or whispering something to her friends. She was looking at Kenzi with a kind of sad hopefulness Kenzi recognized. She told her story to that girl, and it flowed out of her more eloquently than she could have ever rehearsed it. She spoke of the shame and fear that had followed. She talked about how long she’d tried to keep it to herself, how she’d tried to convince herself it hadn’t happened. How she’d thought for a long time that telling her story would hurt the people she loved, but what she’d discovered was she’d hurt them anyway because a secret like that slowly destroys a person. Her advice was to not wait in fear until you’re almost thirty. You don’t have to tell everyone; tell one person you trust.

  Kenzi thought of Dax when she said that and her voice tightened with emotion. “One good person can change everything.”

  Kenzi met the eyes of the girl in the front as she finished her speech. The girl was wiping away tears. Kenzi hoped her message of hope and survival would give her the courage to share her own story, whatever that story was. When she listed off the confidential services that were available through the school, she prayed the girl found her way to one of them.

  As Kenzi left the stage, there was a light applause, somewhat forced. Many of the students were already talking to their
friends or texting. Kenzi didn’t care. Her message had been heard by someone who needed to hear it. That was all that mattered.

  When the director approached Kenzi and told her she’d done well, Kenzi took her aside and mentioned the girl in the front row. The director nodded sadly and said that she’d noticed her crying, also, and that she’d make sure she connected with a counselor. Kenzi knew well that there was no quick fix, no one thing anyone could say that would right whatever wrong had been done to the girl, but at least now the girl had someone she could talk to. Someone who would hear her the way Dax had heard Kenzi. School budgets had cut many of the counseling services, but the director said she’d follow up with her personally. She asked if Kenzi would speak at another school, and Kenzi agreed to discuss the possibility later in the week. Kenzi wasn’t sure she wanted a public speaking career, but she now saw an area where she could make a difference. For as long as Kenzi could remember, her mother had been hosting fundraisers for a variety of organizations. Kenzi had always looked at them as an excuse for her mother to throw big parties, but it was more powerful than that. Her mother was already making a difference in the world. Kenzi vowed to soon feel the same way about herself.

  Lexi and Willa hugged Kenzi as soon as she walked off the stage. “You were amazing,” Willa said.

  “You really were,” Lexi added as she pulled her aside. “There’s something you need to know, though. We didn’t tell anyone you’d be here, but—”

  “But?” Kenzi asked in a rush. She scanned the back of the auditorium for who she hoped would be there even though it made no sense that he would be. Her stomach did a nervous flip when she saw one of her brothers leaning against the back wall.