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A Flash Of Inspiration; A Collection Of Flash Fiction Stories

Ray Daley

A Flash Of Inspiration

  Raymond Daley

  Copyright 21/2/2012 by Raymond Daley

  A Flash Of Inspiration; A Collection Of Flash Fiction Stories

  By Ray Daley

  Introduction.

  What you are about to read here is a collection of 28 very short stories.

  Some were written as jokes, some were written as personal tests (purely to see if they could be done) but all of them were written to explore a new story format.

  I've discovered that I quite enjoy this new ultra short format, it's quite a challenge to convey an idea in so few words. It's quite good as a creative outlet because sometimes you just don't feel like writing a lot but you still want to write something.

  That's where the flash story comes into its own.

  Most of these stories were originally published on Facebook (because I like to keep my friends entertained with my new ideas) but some of them are exclusive to this particular release.

  There are many different ideas so hopefully they appeal to a wide range of people, I've also decided to add authors notes to each story to explain why I wrote them. I've also added how long each story is as well as when they were either written (as most were written right away) or when they were started.

  I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them.

  21/2/12

  Armstrong's Last Words, A Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley.

  Every human alive is aware of the most famous sentence spoken by astronaut Neil Armstrong.

  Those immortal words heralded a new beginning. Little did we know it was not the bright future we had long hoped for.

  The morning of July 20th 1969 was like any other apart from one thing. Men were approaching the moon for the first time. Human beings were going to step forward onto the surface of another world.

  Capcom radioed the craft as it slowly drew closer, eager to get a better opinion on our closest celestial neighbour from someone who was within visual range.

  "Hey Neil, how's that moon looking up close?"

  There was pause.

  Capcom expected as much due to radio signal delay.

  They didn't expect the response that followed.

  The response that went down in history.

  The last message received from the craft was a warning.

  "That's no moon. It's a space station."

  THE END.

  ______________________

  Authors Notes:- I was hoping to write a much longer story out of this idea but it eventually proved to be too much of a task. This story came from the final line (which is from Star Wars), and was going to be about how our planet came to be invaded by aliens.

  Not including the title it's 151 words long.

  Sun, 08 Apr 2012

  The Treasure

  The woman cried as she searched for what she had lost.

  She raised her empty hands and placed her head within.

  The woman cried for what she had finally found.

  She had lost her mind.

  ______________________

  Authors Notes:- At only 36 words this is one of the shorter works, it came from me writing a couple of stories about mental illness.

  4 May 2012

  Burn, A Micro Flash Fiction Story By Ray Daley.

  The firemen brought the FLIR forward to measure the blaze.

  "How hot?" asked the chief.

  "450 Fahrenheit sir" said the fireman holding the FLIR.

  "Great," said the chief "Another library will survive."

  [And unless you are a sci-fi fan that will go straight over your head.]

  ______________

  Authors Notes:- Another very short one at only 32 words.

  Obviously this was inspired by Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451, it was written shortly before his death. His work has inspired me massively, that and the fact we share the same name as well.

  For those unfamiliar with the word FLIR, it stands for Forward Looking Infra-Red, it's normally a camera used for detecting heat.

  I included that after thought, realising you'd have to be a massive Sci Fi geek to get the joke.

  On the day he died, I republished it in his memory.

  Here's to you Ray, thanks for all the fantastic stories.

  I Took All The Swearing Out (A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Ray Daley)

  The End (Sat, 05 May 2012 15:59:26 GMT)

  ___________

  Authors Notes:- One of the ones I wrote as a joke.

  The title says it all. I'm quite notorious for swearing in my stories.

  This was me taking a dig at myself.

  I guess it's technically only no words long.

  9 May 2012

  The Million Year Trip, A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley

  "Ladies & Gents, this is your Captain speaking. We are now en route to Auriga IV, our estimated journey time will be one million years. Be advised, the first person I hear saying 'Are we there yet?' will be thrown out the airlock. Have a lovely trip."

  THE END.

  ___________________

  Authors Notes:- Everyone hates hearing "Are we there yet?" and I think I'd been watching an episode of The Simpsons where Grandpa was asking this.

  Inspiration comes from strange places.

  This one is 47 words long.

  12 May 2012

  Believe What You Will, A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley

  Jim was arrested by the police for being a Basque Separatist.

  He had cried foul, claiming to be following his political beliefs.

  "Not in the womens lingerie department of M&S." they had told him.

  THE END.

  _________________

  Authors Notes:- Another one of the ones I wrote as a joke.

  When I discovered they spell the word basque the same way as the lingerie item the joke/story practically wrote itself.

  Only 34 words long!

  14 May 2012

  Scary Monsters, A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley

  As always, Billy Melman never solved his own problems. He had to resort to other means. "I'm getting my dad! He'll beat you up!"

  "Get your dad! I'll get mine, he's much scarier than your dad." I told him.

  Billy Melman ran off to get his dad. No way was his dad scarier than mine, I was going to win this one for sure.

  I'd neglected to tell Billy Melman he'd been dead for 15 years.

  Damn right he was scarier.

  Now all I needed was a spade.

  THE END.

  _______________

  Authors Notes:- As a child I always hated those kids who'd say "I'll get my dad on you" because they couldn't fight their own battles.

  This is my revenge on them.

  At 88 words it's one of the longer stories in the collection.

  18 May 2012

  Put Him Back! A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Ray Daley

  They analysed the human.

  Again.

  Just to make sure.

  Errrx turned his three most sensitive tentacles towards his lead probester.

  "You idiot! You bloody stupid idiot! Have you ANY clue who this IS? Put him back! Put him back NOW! We're screwed! Invasion over! He'll tell EVERYONE! This was supposed to be one easy kidnap, one minor target no-one will ever miss - but no. You had to kidnap bloody Isaac Asimov!"

  The End.

  _______________

  Authors Notes:- Sometimes you wonder where other SF authors get their ideas from. This was my thought about what inspired the creative mind of Isaac Asimov
.

  I like to think he'd have found it funny.

  It's 72 words long.

  18 May 2012

  The First Men On... A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Ray Daley

  "Man but that landing was scary".

  I could hear the fear in his voice, even across the suit intercoms.

  This planet looked like a complete shithole but we were here now.

  "Did we decide on a name yet?"

  I wasn't choosing. It was his turn. I named the last one.

  "Nope, you choose. It's a craphole anyway. I don't want to be the man who named a craphole."

  "Fine. I'm scared stiff after that landing. Let's call it Terror. Someone's bound to misspell it in Admin."

  THE END.

  ____________________

  Authors Notes:- Lots of "Earth Origin" stories exist. Even as a gag, I still enjoyed doing this one.

  It's 86 words long and says a lot.

  19 May 2012

  Failure, A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley

  The Admiral faced The President.

  "Sir, I'm sorry to report that our invasion has failed."

  "The Navy wasn't powerful enough?" asked The President.

  The Admiral felt embarrassed at having to correct his President. "It's not that sir. Lichtenstein isn't near any sea."

  The Admiral turned and left, ashamed at both himself for having obeyed such a stupid order and his President for having given it in the first place.

  The End.

  ____________

  Authors Notes:- Eventually America will start to run out of places to invade. On that day, I hope something like this happens. America takes itself FAR too seriously as a super power.

  Frankly it deserved a zinging.

  It's a lot to say in only 69 words.

  30/5/12

  Another Day in the Corp(se) A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley

  Our instructor rises. "What's that maggots? I can't hear you? Show me your war cry!"

  "BRAINS!!!!!!" We shout as one.

  "Drill time! Left, right, left, right. You call that lurching? I've seen deader eyes on soap actors!"

  "On the word of command go, you will lurch, in an arrowhead formation over to this pig carcass we have erected here for you practice feeding on."

  "What is it Horowitz? You're Jewish and can't eat a pig? Does the Torah say anything about being exempt if you're dead?"

  Apparently he doesn't know so we're dismissed until someone can check.

  Another wonderful day in the corpse.

  THE END.

  ______________

  Authors Notes:- Another idea that I hoped would become something longer, possibly a story about an army of zombies.

  Obviously to be in an Army you need training.

  When you read the instructors voice, in my head he sounds like R. Lee Ermey who played Gunnery Sergeant Hartman in Full Metal Jacket.

 

  Next time you read these 103 words, you will hear him.

  31/5/12

  Crash! A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Ray Daley

  The letter was opened.

  Our stocks stood higher than ever, our futures had made our broker almost as rich as us.

  The market showed no sign of letting up.

  "Happy New Year! Here's to another year of record profits!"

  "Here's to a wonderful 1929!"

  The End.

  _______________

  Authors Notes:- A story that sadly only works if you are aware of the Stock Market Crash of 1929, the worst global finance crisis in history.

  Another fairly short one at only 44 words.

  31/5/12

  Mission Briefing, A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley

  On the journey to the front-line we watched a comedy, our ancestors made them so well they were still funny over a thousand years later. "What's this one called again?"

  "Starship Troopers. It's hysterical!"

  Our platoon leader called us to attention. "Listen in, we don't know how but our ancestors left us this combat instruction film against the enemy."

  We watched in amazement, how had they known so much over a thousand years ago?

  "Sir, who was that hero defeating the enemy back then?" a trooper asked.

  "It says his name was Charlton Heston. He sure knew how to kill Apes!"

  THE END.

  ___________________

  Authors Notes:- Sometimes I wonder how people in the future will view what we have done in the name of creativity, this was was quite good fun to have them thinking our movies were actual historical records. I know it was done in Galaxy Quest with tv but this was too much fun to resist not doing.

  101 words say exactly what I wanted them to.

  1/6/12

  The No Show, A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley

  He looked at his watch for the 19th time. "It's been an hour, he's not coming!" he said.

  "Give him 5 more minutes, I promise you he said he'd be here this time." said his compatriot.

  "You said that 10 minutes ago. I'm leaving. Screw him. Screw waiting for Godot. He's a twat, he NEVER turns up."

  THE END.

  _______________

  Authors Notes:- Sometimes a good title can be inspiring. I've never read "Waiting For Godot" so I have no idea if he turns up. Or even what it's about.

  Another fairly short one at 57 words.

  1/6/12

  The Insistent, A Micro Flash Fiction Story by Raymond Daley

  Now, now, everything was now with her. I hated her for it. Then the news broke over the airwaves.

  "The world will end in 10 minutes time." Could she change?

  "No! I don't want it later! I want my Apocalypse now!"

  Bitch.

  THE END.

  __________

  Authors Notes:- Another joke where the penultimate line inspired the story. 42 words exactly, Douglas Adams would be proud!

  1/6/12

  Always End On A Joke, A Micro Flash Fiction by Raymond Daley

  My craft is now stuck in the marshes and I'm surrounded. The situation is bleak, those buggers are well over 20 feet long. They call them Electrophorus Electricus Giganticus and they hit with a charge strong enough to kill a man.

  Right now the cabin is still secure but it's just a matter of when they break through. My drill sergeant always said when faced with a bleak situation, always try to end on a joke.

  The door smashed open and they were on him in seconds.

  Before he died the voice recorder aboard the craft logged his last transmission.

  "My hovercraft is full of eels."

  THE END

  _______

  Authors Notes:- I doubt many people have taken a line from Monty Python (especially one that wasn't a punch line) and written a story around it. I'd done a few status updates around this line, this story is probably the best of them.

  At 106 words its one of the longer ones.

  7/6/12

  No World For Vampires

  When the existence of vampires became common knowledge their power was gone. It became impossible for them to feed on humans, we knew how to kill them, how to protect ourselves. When the Global Elite offered the vampires their own planet, no strings attached they practically bit our hand off.

  So to speak.

  We gave them a ship, computer piloted, course pre-set.

  We wanted them to know how much we cared so it was christened The Van Helsing.

  We cared that much.

  All viewing ports were blacked out, no chance of sunlight accidentally killing any of these brave pioneers of space. Blast-off was scheduled for midnight making boarding easier. We lit the fuse, let them be spaces problem. Bye bye vampires, send us a postcard!

  The journey took a month at full speed. A barren globe known only as HNKV824. They christened it Vampireworld. The craft landed at the peak of darkness.

  We gave them a
planet. We neglected to tell them one thing. It only got three minutes of darkness every day.

  Good day sunshine.

  THE END.