Lonesome Hearts

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  _Mjly is Yljm's love life. She is her sisters, her mothers, herselves and her ancestors. But poor old Yljm can never be a mother or a sister--just himself!_

  _lonesome hearts_

  By RUSS WINTERBOTHAM

  Illustrated by Kelly Freas

  It seems unnecessary to say that my story began a long time ago, but Ido not intend to be subtle. I am not clever and my lying is unpolished,almost amateurish. So I certainly could not be subtle, which requiresboth cleverness and an ability to tell the truth and a lie in the samebreath.

  Let us turn back the clock a few ages. I was lying in the sun thinkingof love. I understand that you human beings have an aversion tobiological discussion, so I will not go into detail. But I must remindyou that my love life is quite different from yours, for I am fromanother planet. At the time under discussion, I was most deeply in love.

  My heart's desire had no shape, the lovely creature. She had nointelligence, the divine soul. But she was the greatest bit ofprotoplasm in any galaxy you could name. By our standards, I probablymight be called handsome. I was young and healthy. I had all of my genesand chromosomes. My color was the dirty green that is associated withbeauty.

  The sun warmed my body and the tidal undulation of my planet's surfacerocked me gently. And then she came into my life. She floated gently inthe breeze, her dainty figure held aloft by a mere hint of levitation.Sparks of static electricity shot from her tender cilia so brightly thatI was forced to exude a layer of protective fibre to protect my visualbuds. She sucked a deep breath of cyanic gas into her pulmonary pouchand spoke to me sweetly with a voice like distant thunder.

  "My dear Yljm, the world is coming to an end."

  I could not believe her, for she had no intelligence. She only loved totalk. "Perhaps," I said, "but not today."

  "Very soon, then," said she. Her name was Mjly.

  I watched her with patronizing amusement. The static electricity showedthat she was nervous and upset, but people often get nervous and upsetover trivial matters. "Now, how," I reasoned, "could our world come toan end? The other planet has gone on for thousands of years withoutcolliding with us. We circle it, in fact."

  "No," Mjly said, "that is not our doom. Actually our world will notcease to exist. Life will end here, that is all."

  "Ah," I said. "Our atmosphere is escaping into space." I sucked air,viciously. True, the air was thin. True, the atmosphere was escaping.But there would be breathable amounts for many thousands of centuriesyet to come.

  "Not the air. The food is all gone. Things we eat have ceased to exist."

  I levitated myself and looked out over the throbbing land. A few yearsago, this land had been covered with vegetation. I had come to takevegetation so much for granted that I'd ceased to notice it. Now it wasgone. There were no round fruits growing from tender grasses, no tubersdangling from the fungus trees, no legume vines sprawling over therocks. Everywhere lay desert, barren dunes shaking their crests withtidal motion.

  I lowered myself to the ground and dug my big fibrosities into the sod.No green leaves grew there beneath the surface. The soil was dead. "Thiswill seriously interfere with our future, Mjly," I said.

  "We might eat each other," she replied, "but then there would be no oneleft."

  "No one? There are many others here."

  "The others are dying," said Mjly, blinking her otic nerves eerily. "Wesoon will be the only ones left."

  It was indeed a senseless thing to do, to die just because there was nomeans of going on living. But I must admit that I was tempted for amoment. But I hung onto myself, for there was Mjly, and as long as shelived, there was a reason for me to live too.

  "It's not a cheerful prospect," I said, "but I suppose death bystarvation is the best way out. We will face death as we have lived,cheerfully and fortuitously."

  "And why should we die, when there is another world so close?" sheasked.

  "Are you suggesting interplanetary flight, my dear?" I was amused again,even though there was little enough left to be amused at.

  She crinkled her sense of smell in reply, and I realized I was not beingamused at the right time. Anchoring herself by magnetic processes, shebegan to weave the atmosphere delicately with her taste-bud tendrils.Quickly she hollowed the air molecules into a reflective mirror, andbrought it to focus on our neighboring world. I levitated myself into aposition so that I could look into the mirror.

  The near planet was quite satisfactory. It was the one you know as theearth. It was young. It was green. Huge fern-like plants grew abundantlyon its surface. It was full of food. And near.

  "The trip could be made by levitation," Mjly said.

  I hung back. "Animals might live there. We'd be devoured."

  "I am not afraid," she said.

  "We might not get hungry for a time. Let us linger here awhile. Laterwhen we get desperate, there will be time enough for interplanetaryflight." I hated the thought of stuffing myself full of air enough tolast for the long trip.

  Mjly lowered her visual buds. "I am going to become a mother," she said.

  "Go then, and become a mother. I'll stay here till I get hungry and thenjoin you."

  Mjly unflexed her sense of touch and I felt sorry for her. "If I couldbe sure," I said, "that no wild animals live on the earth, I'd gosooner."

  She snapped her sense of balance in happiness. "I will go first," saidshe. "If everything is pleasant and safe, I will return and let youknow."

  I nodded my otic nerves and off she went.

  As you human beings are doubtless aware, space levitation is quitecomplicated, but not beyond accomplishment. Once you are able to reachthe speed of escape the rest is easy. But Mjly was young and strong andsoon she had disappeared from sight traveling at a tremendous velocity.I followed her as long as I could with the telescope and then I loweredmyself to the tidal crest of a nearby sand dune and lost myself inmetaphysical thoughts.

  Almost half a year later I realized that Mjly had been gone longer thanI expected. Either she had been eaten by wild animals on the earth, orshe had forgotten me.

  I was beginning to get lonesome and in a few more months I would gethungry. At the thought of enduring two such excruciating pains at asingle time, I decided to risk my life. I would travel through space tothe earth and try to find my beloved.

  As you may have guessed, the planet on which we had been living is theone you now know as the Moon, and the distance to the earth iscomparatively small. The sand dunes now have hardened and the tidal swayof its surface can be felt only slightly. The moon no longer turns onits axis and it has no sweetly scented cyanide in its atmosphere. It hasno atmosphere of any sort. But it stands now as it did when I left it,glorious in death. Since I departed, no living thing has trod its soil.

  My scientific sense instinctively came to the rescue as I approached theearth. I felt a strong gravity wrenching at my vitals and so instead oftrying reverse levitation, I spread my processes so that the atmospherecaught in the folds of my skin and I came floating gently down to theground without harm.

  The earth was much as it had appeared through the molecule telescope. Itwas covered with green vegetation, good, rich, nourishing stuff. Andthere was enough to feed Mjly and me for a million years.

  There were no animals of any sort. Again I went to my scientific sensefor the answer. I realized that while vegetable life was far advanced,animal life had yet to appear. Mjly was the first of this type of lifeever to set foot on terrestrial soil.

  But where was she? On the moon, I could often locate her a thousandmiles away by a simple radio call. Although the earth was much largerthan the moon, I did not doubt that she was within a tho
usand miles. SoI generated power and issued a call.

  I waited for the response. It came feebly to my antenna.

  Using my sense of direction, I pushed through the vegetation in searchof her. I did not levitate, because the feebleness of her call indicatedshe might be hurt and on the ground. Besides, levitation is much moredifficult on the earth than on the moon.

  The reply came stronger to my next call and I sensed through seven of mysenses that she was near. She was on the ground, probably injured, whichexplained why she had not returned as she had promised.

  I came to a patch of wilderness, a great marshy plain. In the middle ofthis swamp was a crater, like those caused by meteors, a deep, ugly scarin the mud. I shuddered at the thought that my darling Mjly might havelanded there. Her weaker scientific sense might not have given her thecue to use her skin as a parachute and she might have made the fatalmistake of trying to reverse-levitate.

  "Mjly!" I called, speaking aloud now. "Mjly! Where are you?"

  "Yljm! I am here!"

  Yes, the voice came from the crater. Gliding to its rim, I looked down.A pool of water lay on the bottom. A greenish scum covered the surface.The scum moved with a million tiny wriggles.

  "Yes, Yljm," came Mjly's voice. "It is I. But I am no longer one being."And her voice sounded like a million tiny chirps joined together. "Ilanded with such force that I came apart. Now each of my body cellslives a life of its own. And now and then each cell grows fat andbecomes two. I am my sisters, I ..."

  Let's not be subtle about it. Mjly was a microbe, the beginning ofanimal life on the earth. She lives today, she is and always will be hersisters, her mothers, herselves and her ancestors. But there are fewancestors, for microbes do not die--just part of themselves die.

  And I do not die. For I crept away into a hole in the ground, where Iwill live forever. I do not starve, for roots reach me here. But I missmy love life with Mjly. I can never be a mother or a sister. I willalways be me, a lonesome old bem.

  ... THE END

  Transcriber's Note:

  This etext was produced from _If Worlds of Science Fiction_ July 1954. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed. Minor spelling and typographical errors have been corrected without note. Two occurrences of the word 'visory' have been amended to _visual_.