Shadows On The Wall

SHADOWS on the WALL

  By

  Mia Tyson

  * * * * * *

  PUBLISH BY:

  Shadows On The Wall

  Copyright © 2012 by Mia Tyson

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  This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or places, events or locales is purely coincidental. The characters are productions of the author’s imagination and used fictitiously.

  She couldn’t believe that he was gone.

  Leah stared up at her ceiling, watching the shadows play. Twisted up in her sheets, she tried to go back to sleep but she couldn’t. She wasn’t even sure if she wanted to because then the nightmares would come back and the nightmares were what woke her in the first place. She missed David terribly. Normally he would be there to stroke her head if she was having a hard time sleeping, though she rarely did when he was lying beside her. Leah was always comforted, crawling into David’s side, molding her body to fit his shape. She would run her cheek across his face, scruffy from his 5 o’clock shadow…

  Leah shook her head, freeing herself from the memories. Groaning, she turned to her side and grabbed her watch off the dresser, squinting into its face. Grumbling at the time, Leah shifted her weight, lying on her back again. The shadows had stopped moving. Her eyes were heavy and they itched; she was exhausted but still she couldn’t fall back to sleep. She wasn't much rest lately and was getting use to the idea. Often she would wake after only two or three hours of sleep, staying awake, staring into the darkness until she cried herself back to sleep.

  She tugged at the neck of David’s shirt that she wore to bed; the heat was agonizing tonight; sweat dripped down Leah’s back. David was supposed to put the air conditioner in.

  “Well, when are you going to put in the air conditioner? It’s sweltering in here David.” Leah stood in the center of the nearly empty bedroom, imagining how she would decorate. David had given her the freedom to do as she please with the new loft they just bought.

  David chuckled, a light, carefree laugh. “I’ll put it in tonight.” He was lying on the lone mattress in a corner of the room, his arms folded behind his head, looking up at the ceiling.

  Leah’s eyes narrowed. “You’ve been saying that for the past three days.” She glanced at David, a small smirk playing on his lips. His usually coifed chestnut hair was uncombed and disheveled; his beard had started to grow in. David hadn’t been to work since they got the loft, taking vacation to fix up the apartment and ‘christen it properly’ with Leah, as he liked to say. Leah smiled at the sight of his scruffiness and walked over to him. She straddled his waist.

  “See? You’re all sweaty because it’s so hot in here.” Leah pulled at the neck of David’s shirt. “Don’t you hate being sweaty?”

  David’s green eyes twinkled as he found a bead of sweat trailing down Leah’s face and wiped it away. He shrugged his shoulders and exhaled a content sigh. “I don’t mind it much, as long as I’m sweaty with you.” Then he smiled brightly and Leah melted. “Look.” David nodded his head up to the ceiling. Leah followed his gaze. “The shadows are dancing.”

  Leah’s eyes snapped open startled by her obnoxious alarm cutting into her dream like a butter knife. She had absolutely nothing to do, nothing planned for the day; there was really no need for an alarm. However, her therapist insisted that she not stay in bed all day. Even if she did nothing but stare at her wall, she said that it was imperative for Leah’s recovery that she not lie in bed. Most days, Leah had a half a mind to break her alarm into pieces, but she couldn’t admit that she enjoyed the dreams and nightmares. At least when she was awake she had some control over which memories crept into her subconscious.

  After a small inner battle, Leah cursed the alarm and her therapist, dragged her body out of bed and stretched, listening to all the muscles in her back crack. She cut the alarm off before scanning her room. A paper thin slit of sunlight was creeping into the bedroom from a gap in her thick curtains. Bothered, Leah squinted at it before she drew the curtains fully close. She pulled her robe from off the floor and draped it around her shoulders.

  She was assaulted with sunlight the moment she opened the bedroom door; the curtains in the living room were pulled completely open. The living room was clean, beer bottles no longer strewn over the floor. Her clothes were neatly folded and pushed into a corner of the room waiting to be washed. The dishes that had been piling in the sink just the day before, were suddenly clean. Leah stood, addled, trying to think back to the night before. Hazy flashes of her mother coming in the previous night and helping a drunken Leah into her bed ran through her mind. Leah had a party last night with her misery and a twelve pack of beer. She vaguely remembered her mother tucking her in and singing a lullaby to Leah, like she use to do when Leah was a child. Leah knew that her mother must have cleaned up after and left out before she could wake up. She made a noise of aggravation and shook her head. Her mother meant well but Leah wished that she wouldn’t come around. She didn’t want anyone to see her.

  Leah sighed and made her way to the bathroom. Looking in the mirror, she barely recognized herself. Leah brought her hand to her face, examining the wrinkles that seemed to appear overnight. They seemed out of place on her twenty six year old face. Her eyes were bloodshot from the constant crying, dark rings coiled around them. She ran her hand over her hair, trying to tame the frizz to no avail.

  “Look at them,” Leah swooned, “Don’t they look great?” David was standing behind her as she looked at the image of them in the mirror. She rested her head on David’s broad chest. He smiled as he looked at his fair haired girlfriend, who wrinkled her nose in response. They did look amazing together. He pushed Leah’s hair to the side and lightly kissed her neck. A content sigh escaped her lips. She turned around to look at her fiancé and could see every shine that seemed to pass through his eyes.

  “I love you,” Leah said simply.

  David smiled and nuzzled his face in Leah’s neck. “I love you so much.” His muffled reply tickled her and Leah giggled.

  It was Saturday morning; neither of them had to work. Everything moved in slow motion on Saturdays for them. They would wake up late and stay in their pajamas all day. Leah would cook breakfast and they would watch old movies and David would cook dinner. Both looked forward to the simplicity of Saturdays.

  “What do you want for breakfast?”

  The warm water hit Leah’s skin, sending a chill through her spine. She stood underneath the shower head, not moving, letting the water cascade over her body. Her form shook as she fought back tears. She held her hand over her mouth, trying to stifle the cry that was about to rip through her body.

  “Why?!” No longer able to hold it back, the question tore through her throat. She wished someone would answer her. Make it all make sense. “I loved him so much.” She muttered out to no one. Leaning her weight against the shower wall, Leah tried to hold her suddenly weak frame upright. Instead she slid down, settling on the shower floor, the water running on her head. She brought her hands to her face, sobbing into them.

  Leah sat on the shower floor for hours; until the water became so cold, she was shivering, her nails turning blue. She dragged her naked body from the tub into the bedroom, trailing water as she walked over to her closet.

  David’s clothes were still hung up as if he was still
around. Leah had to search through all his t-shirt and jeans to find her clothes, putting herself through torture every morning. But she couldn’t bear to throw them away; throw him away, like she was kicking him out; as if he had done something wrong. In fact, David rarely did anything wrong. Occasionally he would leave the toilet seat up or leave his clothes around the apartment.

  Leah walked through the apartment door and tripped over a pair of David’s jeans lying on the floor. She caught herself on the door handle before she completely fell.

  “Damn it David!”

  David poked his head out from behind a wall. “What happened?”

  Leah pulled the jeans off the floor and threw them at him. “How hard is it for you to put your shit in the laundry?”

  Catching the jeans, David laughed. “I’m sorry babe.”

  “It’s not funny. You’re so damn lazy.”

  “Are you really mad?” David asked, confusion etched into his defined face.

  Leah brushed past him and walked into the living room, looking around. “Look! Dishes here, more clothes there.