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Conflicted Love

Lola Stark


Page 1

  Prologue

  Trip

  “Scotch on the rocks,” I told the bartender before turning back to the party. Doing a quick sweep of the room, I took in all the crap hanging from the ceiling, streamers, paper bells and bird-shaped shit. The confetti and champagne glasses were strewn across every surface. It looked like cupid had walked in and puked on the place. The lovey-dovey shit was for the birds.

  My eyes fell on Mace and Scarlett holding each other on the dance floor. Scarlett looking up at Mace like he’d hung the stars and moon. Mace looking down at her like she was God’s gift made just for him. The way they were with each other made me wanna poke my eyeballs out with a fork. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy for them. There weren’t two people I knew who deserved to be as happy as those two were, but the thought of being with one person for the rest of my life made me nauseous and claustrophobic.

  Turning back to the bar, I picked up my glass and downed it in one hit. I’d need a good bit of booze to get me through the night, to deal with all the sweet-cutesy crap.

  I scanned the room, again my gaze landing on Teeny sitting quietly on her own in a corner, smiling sadly at the happily engaged couple. As somber as she looked, she was still a knock out, and she still wasn’t speaking to me. Not nicely anyway. One night of stupid, drunken decisions and I’d royally screwed up years of carefully constructed friendship.

  I was an asshole, but I’d warned her I was. In all fairness, I’d been upfront about my one night rule before I took advantage of a liquor-fueled situation. Still, I felt like I’d screwed shit up. Teen looked at me like she wanted to do bodily harm; gone was her usual happy-go-lucky sweet smile.

  Mace and Scar broke away from their lip lock as Teeny stood up and made her way in my direction toward the bar. My eyes instantly dropped to her swelling cleavage and rounded hips. I’d never wanted to bang a chick more than once in my life; it was confusing. On one hand, I figured it was because she was in my life so much. I mean, of course, I would want more; she was without a doubt the best lay I’d had, not to mention she was a great girl. On the other hand, perhaps I was just turning into a pussy.

  Mace’s voice behind me drew me out of my thoughts “You gonna stare all night or do something about it?” he asked as he clapped me on the shoulder, leaned over the bar and ordered a beer.

  My eyes still trained to Teeny’s short green dress. The shoes she was wearing made her legs look unbelievably long. Shrugging my shoulders was the only answer I had for Mace. I couldn’t decide what I wanted to do about the whole cockeyed situation.

  “You look really happy. You’re one damn lucky bastard that woman said yes to your stupid ass,” I told him with a smile. “Though I still don’t understand why you’d wanna be all wifed-up. ”

  “Happy doesn’t even scratch the surface; Scar’s everything I’ll ever need. You’ll get it one day, little brother. ” His face went from the soft expression he held when talking about Scar to a small smile. “Probably the day you can put your dick away for five minutes and look at what’s in front of you,” he answered looking toward an approaching Teeny.

  “Don’t you fuckin’ start too; you sound like Ma. Teeny can’t stand me. Besides, I like my dick outta my pants; it finds all kinds of fun shit to do. ”

  “Who said I was talking about Teeny?” Mace smirked, adjusted his arm in his sling and took a step off to the side leaning against the bar facing the party. No doubt looking for Scar— those two were practically attached at the hip.

  I ordered another scotch and a vodka tonic, and pushed it in front of Teen as she stepped up to the bar. She looked down at it and sniffed. A look of disgust crossed her pretty face as she pushed the glass aside. “Can I have a ginger ale please?” she asked the bartender.

  Sick of her testy attitude, I called her on it. “What the fuck did I do to you?”

  She turned toward me, her face hardening and sneered, “You’ve done enough!”

  “Oh, Princess, I haven’t even started on what I want to do to you,” I told her, the honest answer leaving my mouth before my brain could filter it. Her face crumpled and she turned and raced toward the restrooms.

  Fuck this shit.

  I was gonna find out what her problem was with me if it killed me. I downed the last of my drink and pushed off from the bar. “Hold up, bud, I’ll walk with you. Scar’s takin’ too long. ”

  With a nod, we both made our way across the busy room avoiding grabby aunties as we went.

  The moment I stepped around the corner into the long walkway, I came to an abrupt halt. A mixture of emotions hit me all at once; jealousy, anger, protectiveness and something that made my chest tight.

  Scar’s voice drifted to my ears, “The stress isn’t good for the baby, sweetie. You need to tell him. ”

  Teeny stood there, her back to us, Scarlett holding the tops of her arms. The second Scar lifted her gaze, her eyes flicked around and a whispered, “Oh shit!” escaped her lips.

  Teeny spun around with an audible gasp, tears marking her face. Her hand went to her stomach along with my gaze.

  WHAT THE FUCK!

  I hesitated to move closer; annoyed she hadn’t felt like she could tell me. I mean, she wasn’t seeing anyone but the dude who knocked her up; I’d already decide that he’d better step up and help her, or I’d beat the crap outta him. A shadow of anger at the thought of her being in somebody else’s bed, having somebody else’s hands on her body, those lips around somebody else’s—I shook my head to clear my shitty and confusing train of thought.

  I took a few big strides putting myself in front of her small frame and asked, “Whose is it?”

  Teeny’s body went stiff, her face void of all emotion. Her hand pressed tighter to her stomach. She turned to walk away, but I reached out and gripped her free hand stopping her escape.

  “Whose kid is it?” I asked again as Mace’s hand connected with the back of my head. “What the hell, dude?”

  “Dumbass!” he muttered taking a step toward Scar and Teen. His insult rolled off my back; I didn’t care if I was being an ass. I wanted to make sure Teeny’s guy was gonna take care of her.

  “Fuck you!” she whispered, not looking at me.

  “I never pegged you for stupid, Trip. ” This from Scar.

  “Me stupid? Why? Wait—” My head was spinning like I’d drunk an entire bottle of tequila. The air I was gulping wasn’t getting to my lungs. “Do you mean…?”

  My hand shot out reaching for the wall to steady myself. The room spun out of control as the situation started seeping in. My heart pounded in my chest.

  “Not possible,” I breathed. A million thoughts ran through my head as my eyes slowly moved up to meet Teeny’s, unshed tears glistening in her eyes, her chest heaving.

  Scarlett’s words bounced around in my head. Baby. Teeny was pregnant. Pregnant with a baby, a baby that may be mine. A baby that’s mine?

  How the fuck is this happening? I looked at her hand pressed tightly to her stomach, her very flat stomach where…no. Just no.

  “You sure?” I asked her quietly, my eyes still fixated on her hand. Deafening silence filled the air and I looked back up to her face to see her tough-girl mask firmly in place.

  “No, Trip. No I’m not sure at all. I haven’t had needles jammed into my arms, pissed on sticks and spent most of my days for the last few weeks throwing up for shits and giggles,” she snapped at me.

  Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

  “I can’t—I mean, I don’t know what to say,” I told her trying to sort through the conflicting emotions. I’m too young to be a parent; I wouldn’t even know what to do. Surely I’d do more damage than good. I mean is she sure it’s even mine? I never f
orgot protection, never, not once had I forgotten including that night.

  I realized right away I severely screwed up in more ways than one when Teeny opened her mouth and icily said, “You don’t have to say or do a damn thing. It’s not your problem. ” Barging past me, Teeny took off toward the front door without looking back. Scar kissed Mace and scooted past us with a pat to my shoulder on the way. I slumped against the wall and brought my hands up to run through my hair as Mace stepped up leaning against the wall beside me.

  “Did somebody forget to give you the ‘wrap it before you whack it’ talk? This is…this is big. What’re you thinking?” Mace asked.

  “I don’t have a fucking clue what to think right now. I know I suited up. I never skip that step; it’s ingrained, but Teen isn’t a slut. She never has been. ”

  “Leaves only one conclusion. Congrats, dude. You’re about to be a dad. ”

  “Shit,” I rasped sliding down the wall. I landed on my ass as my head started spinning again.

  A dad.

  Chapter One

  Trip

  Loud banging at the front door pulled me from my fitful sleep. I rolled out of bed and stumbled down the stairs squinting at the bright sunlight as I threw the door open. “What?” I snapped running a hand over my tired eyes.

  “Wake the fuck up, dude. It’s midday and I brought beer. The game starts in half an hour. ” Mace leaned back with a look of amusement on his face. “Get your ass in the shower. You smell like shit. ”

  I cringed at his choice of words. It wasn’t that long ago I had said something similar to him when he’d fucked up his relationship with Scarlett. I figured acting like an asshole was the best way to go; it was my fall back for everything after all.

  “Screw you,” I grouched half-heartedly. “Where’s Scar? Amazing to see you two pry yourselves off each other for a little fresh air,” I grumbled slamming the door after Mace pushed his way past me. Mace had moved out and started living across the road with Scarlett, his fiancée, about the time he was shot in the shoulder by his raving crazy-ass bitch ex-girlfriend. He’d been discharged from the hospital to find all his crap over at her place. Courtesy of me, or rather me following orders from a very determined and equally pissed off Scarlett.

  “Snarky bitch doesn’t suit you,” he gibed. “Have you heard from her yet?” I knew exactly who he was talking about and the reminder spiked my irritation.

  “No. Not a damn word. She hasn’t answered any of my calls, texts or voicemails,” I retorted running my hand through my greasy, unwashed hair.

  “Right, well, it’s only been a week. Give her time to calm down. Scar spoke to her this morning and she’s fine. Just pissed at you,” he informed me as he picked up the remote, flopped down on the couch and dumped the six-pack on the coffee table. “Go shower and we’ll watch the game. Scar’ll be over soon. She’s just finishing up at the parlor. ”

  I turned and stomped up the stairs without another word wondering what I’d have to do to get Teeny to talk to me. I needed to apologize for being an ass. I should have been more careful about what I said to her. I mean, it was a shitty way to find out, and it was kind of sprung on me. What was I supposed to do? Skip around in circles smiling and handing out candy canes while rainbows came out my ass? This wasn’t something I’d ever thought about. Shit, I never wanted to be a parent; it was a huge responsibility; one that people screwed up more often than not. Until a few weeks ago, I’d never even thought about sleeping with the same girl twice. Fuck, I’d never slept in the same bed with a chick until that night. It just wasn’t something I did.