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Looking for Love

Kathy Bosman


Looking for Love

  The Album Book 1 – Ella’s Story

  A Contemporary, Fantasy Romance

  By

  Kathy Bosman

  Looking for Love

  The Album Book 1 – Ella’s Story

  By Kathy Bosman

  Edited by Zee Monodee

  Cover Design by Kathy Bosman

  This is a work of fiction. Names, places, characters, and events are fictitious in every regard. Any similarities to actual events and persons, living or dead, are purely coincidental. Any trademarks, service marks, product names, or named features are assumed to be the property of their respective owners, and are used only for reference. There is no implied endorsement if any of these terms are used. Except for review purposes, the reproduction of this book in whole or part, electronically or mechanically, constitutes a copyright violation.

  LOOKING FOR LOVE

  Copyright © 2015 KATHY BOSMAN

  Acknowledgements

  To Zee Monodee, whose editing is top class and who’s always there to answer questions, give advice and just be a friend. I couldn’t have done this without you. You also gave me the courage to take the step into the world of indie writers.

  To my family who mean everything to me. Thank you for bearing with my blanked-out look when you speak to me while I’m on a writing roll. Thank you to my husband who’s spent too much money on my writing so far. Thank you to my daughter who listens to my complaints and ideas.

  And a special thanks to my beta reader, Elsa Winckler.

  Table of Contents

  Acknowledgements

  Prologue

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Epilogue

  The Album Series

  About the Author

  Other Books by Kathy Bosman

  Prologue

  Four Years Earlier

  “Ross.” Ella tried to choke back the tears. “Are you home?” She spoke to his voice mail, crossing her fingers, hoping he’d call her straight back. “I really need to speak to you.”

  Ending the call, she flung her Blackberry against the single, patchwork sofa of her bachelorette pad and stared at the room. She’d moved in a couple of weeks ago, thrilled to be independent finally, to be earning her own money. She’d just obtained a receptionist position at an optometrist. A great way to start her working career in her early twenties after a couple of years of Business College.

  But it all meant nothing. Steve had broken it off with her.

  Tears filled her eyes and she blinked them away. Where was Ross when she needed him?

  A knock on her door made her jump. Her heart beat so fast that her chest hurt. What if Steve had come to beg for her back?

  No, I won’t go there. I’ve had enough. I don’t want a relationship for a very long time.

  “Ella, it’s me.” Ross’s voice echoed through the wooden panels of the door. “Are you okay?”

  He sounded frantic. Her heart warmed. Her best friend. He’d arrived.

  “I’m coming.”

  She flung open the door. He stared at her, his gaze washing over her, flooding her with understanding, with acceptance. Without a moment’s hesitation, she leapt into his arms. He cradled her for a long time, allowed her to weep, sniffle, sob, not say anything but blubber it all out.

  Eventually, her toes cramped from standing on tiptoes for so long. “Can you come in for a while?” she asked him.

  “Sure. I just came back from work. Was driving when your call came through. I stopped the car to listen to the message you left on my voice mail. Came right here.”

  “Thank you.” She felt awkward, unable to express the depth of her gratitude toward him. “Can I get you a drink? Something to eat?”

  Not like she had much. She’d been too busy setting up home and adapting to working such long hours. School and college had been a breeze in comparison.

  “Just water for now. It’s so hot outside.”

  Ella nodded. She hadn’t even noticed the weather. Every ounce of her concentration had been to keep it together at work and not bring her personal issues into a new job. Coming home hadn’t provided the relief she’d needed. Things Steve had given her for her house-warming party mocked her all over the apartment.

  “He was my college sweetheart. My coming of age relationship.” The words tumbled out. Ross reached her in a minute and engulfed her in another hug. Some of the pain evaporated through the warmth of touch.

  “The water can wait. Come sit,” he said.

  He pulled her to flop down next to him on the couch. The tears had been spent so she just sat in his arms, drinking in his strength and comfort. Her head rested in the crook of his neck and a measure of peace took over her, easing her heart rate and the ache in her chest.

  “Tell me what happened,” he said after a while.

  Ross had instinctive timing. He seemed to know when to hug her, when to say nothing, and when to ask questions. She could trust him a hundred percent. Well, so far.

  She sucked in a breath. Ross needed to know but she didn’t want to relive the memories of the past few weeks. But the concern in his gaze and his patient stance gave her the courage to speak. “You know I told you we’ve been fighting lately? Well, I really didn’t think he’d break it off. There wasn’t any sign he wasn’t happy, except for our disagreements. Well, they had gotten quite heated.”

  Her cheeks throbbed, the blood rushed in her ears.

  “What were the arguments about?”

  “He wanted more, wanted to move in here. You can see this place. I can barely fit. And I was so looking forward to being alone after living with my mom for years. I wanted to learn to be independent, to survive on my own. Yeah, it sounds silly when you’re in love, but shouldn’t every young woman feel that way? We want to know that we can survive without a man, that we’re not totally helpless on our own.”

  He stroked her head. “I’m sure you’re pretty tough. I know you’d do magically on your own.”

  Wish Steve could be so kind. Suppose romantic relationships mess up logical thinking.

  “Thanks. I felt like I was pushing him away physically all the time. It’s not exactly healthy, I suppose. Yet, I do love him, well, I did. Now I hate him.” She fisted the sofa, imagining his face there, then looked away. She could never hate anyone, knew she’d take the hurt inwards.

  “I’m sorry.”

  Ross sounded so sincere that she blinked back tears.

  “It’s not your fault. I just need to get over the shock. Maybe once it’s worn off, I’ll be relieved.” I hope!

  “I don’t know if the pain ever goes away. Remember how I felt after you know who? It still hurts when I think about it.”

  Ella moved away from his embrace and looked into his eyes. She could see the hurt lingering in the depths. Her heart squeezed for him, for the fact that he’d kept it all inside and that he’d also suffered. “But that was at least two years ago. I thought… You said it was good that you broke up eventually.”

  “I’m not denying that. But hey, it still hurts. The memory of the breakup always brings a bitter taste in my mouth.”

  “We’re so similar, it’s scary.”

  He stroked her cheek. “It’s nice.”

  “You’re nice.”

  Close up, he really had the best face in the world—a face that brought her the most comfort.
>
  He bent toward her until his lips touched hers, only a brush. She jerked back. “No, Ross.”

  What just happened? Did I give him the impression I…?

  “Ella, I…” He moved forward again as though she hadn’t just said no.

  “Ross, please.” She stopped him on the chest with her palm, closing her eyes to block out the sight of his mouth close to her. “Leave the kissing out of it. We’re friends. We’ve never had anything romantic.”

  “I can’t see why not.”

  “Do you have feelings for me?” She opened her eyes as the ache in her chest expanded again. She didn’t know how she would handle it if he did.

  “I don’t know. I care about you. You just looked kissable. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry.”

  “Okay, you scared me there. The last thing I want is another boyfriend. I’ve had my fill of relationships for a century.” She rolled her eyes. Although her tone came out light-hearted, the fear he’d want more had paralysed her for a second. She could have lost everything—except her besties and new job—in one week.

  Ross nodded. “I can relate to that.”

  “I seem to keep on attracting the wrong guys, or rather ones who don’t understand me.”

  He patted her on the knee, once again his normal, kind self. “One day, you’ll find someone.”

  “Yeah, one day. But not today. For now, I’m concentrating on building a life for myself. We’re still friends, right?” She’d hate to lose her precious friendship because of an attempted kiss.

  “Of course. We’ll always be friends. My partner in crime.” He knocked his knuckles against her fist in a fun gesture. Phew, he didn’t seem at all offended at her pushing him away romantically. Truly a saint, he was.

  He opened up his arms and she rested back into them. After reaching for the remote, he switched on her TV, about the only appliance she did have. They watched some shows, the comfortable friendship and commenting on the characters’ actions adding to her sense of ease. She began to breathe normally again. Maybe, just maybe, she would get over Steve, after all.

  While they watched a romance, her mind wondered to the potential kiss between Ross and her. She shuddered. Only last week, she’d read her daily fix from the psychology magazine. It had touted the dangers of a woman building a romantic relationship with a man she looked up to as a kind of father figure. Many women who’d had absent fathers or troubled relationships with their fathers, especially as teens—Ella fit that mould perfectly—found a man they looked up to as a father figure. Usually a dependable, kind male figure in their life. She hated admitting that Ross took on that role. He’d been with her since high school, held her hand in the difficult times, soothed her heartbreaks, exactly like a good father should do. He’d been there when she’d hated her mother and wanted to run away to her dad in Durban. Every rant about her parents’ divorce had been piled onto his listening ears. And he’d shared his own heartaches.

  Argh, she could never kiss him. It would be dysfunctional. They’d be messed for life. She’d destroy him. They would ruin a good friendship forever if they went down the romance route. Her friendship with Ross and her three best girly friends were the foundation of her existence. She wasn’t about to risk losing his portion for the taste of his lips, no matter how curious she was at how the kiss would have felt. Nah, no way. No way, Jose.

  Pressing the pause button on the cable TV, she sat up and looked pointedly at her guy friend. “This is the deal.”

  He nodded, his eyes wide, a small smile gracing his mouth.

  “No romance between us. Ever.”

  He shrugged.

  “It will mess up our friendship. What we have goes deeper than romance. I don’t want to mess it up.”

  He nodded.

  “Ever.”

  “Okay.” He sounded defensive.

  “You promise?”

  “I promise.”

  “Shake on it.” She held out her hand. He took it and shook formally, his eyes mock serious, seemingly battling to hold back a laugh.

  “I mean it.”

  “I know. I promise.” He kept on shaking. “Sorry, Ella. You’re just so cute, the way you say it. But I understand fully. I don’t know what came over me wanting to kiss you just now. Just an impulse thing; I wasn’t thinking. We do best as friends. Friends forever.”

  He gave one last vigorous shake and they went back to watching their movie.

  Ella propped her legs up on his lap and leaned her back against the bumpy sofa arm. She yawned. Staring at his profile as he focused on the TV, she smiled. He was such a rock. The best in the world.